Jokes For Retards

Mysterious occurrences loom; the entire world dramatically changes. The fate of individuals and nations becomes bound to AnalogHorror (rule kaidan), and once the chosen of destiny fail, it means countless people in their corresponding nation will be slaughtered by the strange phenomena. The entire world falls into unrest, panic, and despair. Until an absolutely unexpected individual joins the AnalogHorror game. Xiao Yiwang glanced at the weird world before him and then at the examination admission ticket in his hand. "Have middle school entrance exams always been this complicated? Well, it does prove my intelligence!" "I am retarded, but selected to join the analoghorror game?!"

Heartbroken after catching her boyfriend cheating with his colleague on Valentine's Day, Anya impulsively proposes to a stranger in a fit of rage. The stranger, a charming and enigmatic man, accepts her proposal without hesitation. As Anya grapples with the consequences of her impulsive decision, she discovers that her "husband" is not just a random passerby, but someone with a mysterious and powerful connection to her life. He's not just a stranger; he's her boyfriend's boss, a man known for his wealth and influence, but who has kept his true identity hidden from Anya. Now, trapped in a web of lies and deceit, Anya must navigate the treacherous waters of her unexpected marriage while uncovering the truth about her "husband" and his hidden agenda.

Like any 18 year old high school student, Kim Ji-Hye was just busy struggling with expectations and exams. The biggest worries? Overbearing parents and college entrance exams. That, of course, was the case until she accidentally found herself in an unexpected circumstance that led straight into the glowing gates of death! One moment, she was zoning out on an empty school corridor. The next? She was smack in the middle of a field that was way too over dramatic with the moon lighting up the surrounding and to add to it all, questioning all her life decisions. “What the hell? Where the HELL AM I?" Before she managed to figure out whether she had been taken hostage, sedated, or was indeed deceased, the reality had another surprise in store for her. The field evaporated. She was now in a never-ending white void. “Ah right, that is just brilliant. Another case of teleportation. Is my life really that boring that I actually find this exciting?” “Why do you think so?” a deep, unbothered voice replied. Ji-Hye screamed. Floating, there in front of her was a god that was the epitome of ‘a literal god.’ “WHO ARE YOU?” The God sighed. “Welcome Ji-Hye. I do not really know how you made it here, but… yeah, this is awkward.” Ji-Hye blinked. “Am I dead?” "Is that your final guess?" "Nope." “Then where am I?” "Alternate reality." “And how did I get here?” "Because your universe's God did an ‘oopsie’ and misplaced you." “Excuse me?” Apparently, some celestial treasure named Ezekiel was supposed to keep her safely in her time screwed up so badly that she ended up in a reality she wasn’t even supposed to exist in. THANKS EZEKIEL! "So what now?" Ji-hye asked, still trying to process the fact that divine beings are capable of making stupid mistakes The god who introduced himself in a head-turning fashion as Kashigami sighed once more. “Well, I need to send you back… but the thing is, I have no clue which universe is yours. So it might take some time.” “And how long is ‘some time’?” “Perhaps 500 years.” Ji-hye’s eyes had never been so wide. “WHAT IN THE FU–” And there started the journey which I (the author) could describe in many different ways, but for Ji-hye, it was undoubtedly the most unhinged. ✨ READ NOW TO FIND OUT: ✔ How does Ji-hye handle being an anomaly? ✔ Will Kashigami ever be useful? (Spoiler: Probably not.) ✔ Will she ever return home, or is she stuck in this SPACE WARP forever? 5K VIEWS CELEBRATION! JOIN THE DISCORD SERVER https://discord.gg/9Y2KUg3e code is "Ji-hye"

An adult gets sent back to the past to become a substitute teacher for like, what, four (and more) of the worst kids he's ever met? It was initially a favor, but Arel finds himself in deeper mud than he'd thought. His boss was far too different from the future, and this weird girl keeps acting like he's not even supposed to be here. Of course he isn't! But why? Everything collides and he's not even the one to stop it? Why is he even here, then?!

Warning! Mature Content Hernia is his to care for and he doesn’t care what the world thinks of that. >>>>>>> “We could date instead,” Hermia suggested, her voice laced with uncertainty. “I don’t date,” Niklaus replied coldly, his piercing gaze unwavering. Hermia blinked, caught off guard. “So it has to be marriage?” she asked, her tone laced with disbelief. “Yes,” he deadpanned, not a hint of hesitation in his voice. Her frustration bubbled over. “But we don’t even know each other!” she whined, throwing her hands up in exasperation. Niklaus leaned forward, his dark eyes gleaming. “I don’t need to know you, Mia,” he said, his voice dipping into a deep, dangerous tone. “When I can feel you… that’s enough for me.” She inhaled sharply, her heart hammering in her chest. “That’s not enough for me,” she countered, her voice firm but trembling slightly. His expression softened, and his next words wrapped around her like a promise. “I would forever cherish you, adore you, and treat you like the rarest gem. I would never let you shed a single tear of pain.” Her resolve wavered, but she shook her head and pushed back. “We’re not getting married, Shark. Just go.” But instead of leaving, he smirked, leaning back with a confidence that rattled her. “I’ll be waiting.” Hermia groaned, exasperated. “Nik, you’re hardly doing any waiting. You’re all over me! We live together, work together, eat together—you’re always here!” Niklaus’s voice dropped to a whisper, raw and pleading. “Then just keep me forever, Mia.” She froze, his honest, vulnerable eyes piercing through every defense she had built. Her heart quivered as she felt the weight of his words sink in. She didn’t know what to do. >>>>>>>> To the world, Niklaus Hathaway is ruthless—a man who takes what he wants, no matter the cost. But for Hermia, the girl who’s lost everything, he’s something else entirely: her unlikely savior whom she couldn’t blindly trust. He’s ruthless to everyone—except her. Niklaus Hathaway doesn’t date. He doesn’t waste time. He only wants what’s his. When Hermia steps into his life, he makes one thing clear: if she won’t marry him, she’ll work for him. Keeping her close is his only goal, and no amount of gossip, jealousy, or family betrayal will change that. But Hermia’s life isn’t as simple as working for the powerful CEO who’s claimed her as his. With an evil stepsister and manipulative parents determined to ruin her happiness, Hermia must fight for her place in a world that seems determined to push her out. Niklaus declared her his from the beginning—and he’ll stop at nothing to protect her, no matter the cost Love has never been this dangerous.

Sitting in class Lenna can only think about how much she wants to rip someones heart out. People have red orbs in they're chests. An unquenchable hunger folows her. She is throughed into a world full of questions and mysteries were she is one of them.

In a world ruled by billions of superhumans, one young man stands out—not for his power, but for his lack of it. Born without any abilities in a society that worships strength, Arin has always been labeled as insignificant. After the heartbreaking loss of his beloved grandfather, the last anchor in his life, Arin finds himself utterly alone—an outcast drowning in the harsh realities of a world that mocks his simplicity. But when all seems lost, fate intervenes. A mysterious system awakens within him, offering him a chance to rewrite his destiny. -[Welcome, Host. The path to power begins now.] -[Complete this quest to increase your power.] -[Failure will result in death.] -[Warning: The weak have no place in this world. Adapt, or perish.] Driven by the system’s high-stakes challenges, Arin embarks on an extraordinary journey, battling monsters, defying expectations, and shattering the limits placed upon him. As he rises from the shadows, Arin must navigate a dangerous world that once rejected him, learning not only to survive but to thrive. Can he prove that true strength lies not in abilities, but in determination and heart? Or will his newfound power drive him down a darker path, leaving him more isolated than ever? Join Arin’s epic tale of redemption, courage, and self-discovery—a story where being different is the ultimate power.

For as long as Leah can remember, Brian has been her anchor—her best friend, her safe place, her everything. Through late-night beach talks, whispered dreams, and a lifetime of memories, they’ve always had each other. But one summer night changes everything. Brian leaves with no goodbye, no text. NOTHING. Heartbroken and confused, Leah is left with nothing but unanswered questions and a phone that will never ring. Why did he leave? Why didn’t he tell her? And most painful of all—was she not worth a goodbye? As the summer heat fades, Leah is forced to confront the truth: sometimes, the people we love the most leave without warning. But what if this isn’t the end of their story?

[Warning : This book contains Mature content ] 'You never know when you fall for the most unexpected person, in the most unexpected way. ' What would you do if you suddenly married to a cruel but handsome Vampire King? Shy away? Fear away? But our princess here planned to scare him to be docile to her! "Hah! you cruel King, if you want to hurt me in any way thinking that now you are my husband, DREAM ON! " But what she didn't know is, he will rather skin himself alive than to even think about hurting her. . . . . And here starts the sweet love story of Princess Eiana and King Darius. But wait! What Is our king hinging there? Why does it smell of mystery?! . . ... King Darius of Veleris, do you take Princess Eiana of Cenia, to be your wedded wife, to have and hold from this day onwards, for better and for worse, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish her till death do you apart."  Darius looked straight into Eiana's blue eyes and smiled, then said , " Yes, I do. Even after death does us apart. "  And that was it. Eiana froze.

Jake was a guy who just graduated and was a great strategist. On his way to see his parents he was caught In a freak accident where a pole was launched in his chest, and now finds himself in a crypt as a skeleton.

After 3 years of frustration in New Atlantis, Ithri finally says, "F*** it." He’s done. The city's suffocating rules, corrupt nobles, and self-righteous royals have pushed him to the breaking point. Its oppressive bureaucracy and hollow ideals have left him disillusioned. Deciding it’s time to play his hidden cards, Ithri unleashes his potential, plunging headfirst into a dangerous, chaotic world filled with ancient mysteries, ruthless adversaries, and revelations that force him to confront the darkest corners of his soul. The deeper he delves, the more secrets he unravels not only about the world but about his own past.

Born into privilege, Francesca Arginti was promised power from the moment she drew breath. As the sole heir to the dukedom of Argintis, she possessed more wealth than one could ever spend and magic that surpassed any of her peers. Revered as the most beautiful woman in the Empire of Peremza, her suitors were numerous, each eager for her favor. But Francesca was not interested in adoration or love; her sights were set higher. As the Empire’s only Archmage, she wielded unmatched power—both feared and revered. Yet, for all her beauty, wealth, and strength, Francesca was not content. She saw the world around her as a chessboard, and every person, from the lowliest servant to the Crown Prince himself, as mere pawns. Her ambition was boundless, and the throne was the only prize worth pursuing. As she gazed over the city below, Francesca knew one thing: power births power—and she would stop at nothing to claim it.

in the instant of it all there is something which remains is it the memories within? or the yearnings without? Tell me, oh tell me when sacred flaming eyes meet in the twilight zone, what with those searching looks, unsettled until the match is met? is it the undecided pat doing the rest In pure insanity? or the varying whispers that ceases in mid silence? Tell me, oh tell me now what to expect certainly when eyes are evaded and a smiling lip curves solely, what should I really expect? within the minute's pause there dwells possibilities for something to wilter without cause or maybe to spring with abilities!

Don't plagiarize my story! That twilight was the beginning of an unexpected meeting, as if fate indicated that she was the Savior for the Western Knights. Her heart was moved to provide help to the figure of a man who was covered in red spots all over his body. If he didn't immediately run away, perhaps that meeting would never have happened. An encounter that triggered endless raging emotions, disturbed his mind and disturbed his soul. Very noisy! Genre: Fiction, Kingdom, Romance, Drama. The story is set in the Middle Ages. Author: Navee/Lekha Raveena The book cover image is not ours, we just edited it a little.

Omer has a knack for finding humor in the most unexpected places. From his witty comebacks to his lighthearted pranks, Omer's life is a whirlwind of laughter and surprises. But behind his sharp sense of humor lies a deeper story—one of resilience, self-discovery, and connection. "Joke With Omer" is a heartwarming tale that weaves comedy with moments of introspection, as Omer navigates the ups and downs of friendship, love, and the challenges that life throws his way. This book invites readers to see the world through Omer's unique lens, where every situation holds the potential for a laugh and a lesson. Whether it's turning everyday chaos into comedy or uncovering joy in the darkest moments, "Joke With Omer" is a celebration of the healing power of humor and the importance of never taking life too seriously.

Unhappy and unfulfilled, Sirius is murdered. Instead of passing on, the boy is given another chance at life. He wakes in an unfamiliar world where the inhabitants despise humans. A strange, old man gifts Sirius a mysterious stopwatch slowly counting down to zero. When asked what it is ticking down to, the man replies: "Your memories." Will Sirius find a way to keep his memories while dealing with the struggles of his new life? Will he stay alive long enough to get the chance? Does he even want to keep his memories? Or will he break down crying... begging for more time?

Love is blind as well as it sees clearer than any eye can, it is kind on one side and ruthless on the other it is the best thing to happen to loving heart but the worst nightmare to a broken soul

If two people love each other, there will be a happy first love. but me as the first side love, can I find happiness in this love

A long time ago, all the world's lived peacefully. Although not all the worlds knew about each other, everyone lived as peaceful as they could in their respective worlds. And in one of these worlds, almost everyone had supernatural abilities which were powered by substances called rubidstones. Each rubidstone lived inside it's wielder and revealed itself when the wielder wanted it to. Rubidstones only chose people who are pure of heart and a new rubidstone was created once a worthy person was born. And because of it, that world was the most peaceful among them. But one day, a wicked ruler at the far end of all the worlds rose up and decided to broke the peace which the world was living in. He went to that universe with his army of tundumons. Unknown creatures which looked like wolfs but had hands and stood on their hind limbs. Lots of lives were lost that day. But one man was able to change everything. He took the rubidstones he had gathered and escaped to a different world (earth) and spread it across the earth hoping to fulfill a prophecy that was told a long ago. And it said; "One powerful and evil person will rise up and disrupt the peace which all the worlds are living in. And when he's close to victory, one man changes everything. He won't be the one to bring back the peace though, but through him new heroes will be born. And among these heroes, a young boy will take up the responsibility and restore peace once more. He will fight with a motto that said, 'fight for peace'"

Jade Thorne was a successful woman in the prime of her life. But her friends and family won't stop hounding her about getting married and finding someone to live the rest of her life with. Well tough, she was happily single. Her perfectly happy life suddenly went off-kilter when a blond and green eyed someone decided to walk back into her life. Five years had passed but those green eyes are still haunting her dreams and are still the star of a few of her fantasies. An online romance that lasted for 8 months that scarred her far more than she would like to admit. But the tension between them continues to rise with every meeting. She theorized that she never got over him because they never got to meet in real life. For the sake of closure, a quick fun fling would get this out of her system. She was sure she would get bored of him and he would be just another lover she’d kiss goodbye after a few months. Or would that way lie another heartbreak?  

Coraline Hugues is facing major backlashes against the business she's been trying to build up since she was seventeen. In an effort to save face, she goes through with a contracted marriage but her plans go to the ground when people speculated her having an affair with a son from an esteemed noble family. But, Coraline's savior isn't the man everybody thinks it to be. ___ Updates every 3 months

Join Jade Williams on a journey of self discovery and his search for his lost to time friends, travel to the new and different worlds and explore how it feels to be, all powerful yet not strong enough!