Fatty And Skinny Jokes

"It's better to rely on oneself than Buddha, better to become a god than to worship one. If this war needs a god, I will be it." His name is Ji Xinghe. At the age of 65, he went to the alien battlefield to avenge his son. From a mechanic to a mecha warrior, from a private to a five-star general, from an ordinary man to the mentor of generations. He has walked a path of revenge. Looking back, he has become the War God. In his final years, he has the ambition to build an unparalleled mecha. Using Xinghe as a sword, he can shatter the might of the empire. This is a story of a mecha and a sword.

As fire rains from the sky and the world collapses around him, Kain rushes to find his brother Danté—only to discover him lying lifeless in a pool of blood. Before Kain can process the horror, a masked intruder emerges, delivering a fatal blow that leaves Kain dying and the world crumbling into chaos. But when Kain opens his eyes, he’s somewhere else entirely—alive, unscathed, and in a strange new world far removed from the fiery destruction he left behind. Struggling to understand his new reality, Kain stumbles upon a mysterious town and crosses paths with Elara, a powerful young woman with a dark legacy. Their meeting seems fated, but what secrets lie in this unfamiliar land? And could the answers Kain seeks about his brother and his own survival be tied to Elara’s hidden past?

The fragile order struggles in chaos, and the arrogant empire brings back the disasters of the past. The soul that does not belong to this era opens its eyes again: castles, towers, desire and killing, war and magic, mysterious cards awaken the power of the past, and the destined doomsday slowly approaches...

A Boy who gets betrayed by his parents, needs to survive in the wild of an dangerous Forest. Running through the world to see and know it better. His companions on his side. he will face the Sun-Believer and The Moon-Believer, Some are kind some will try to kill him. He will get Strong as he runs through the world but does he need to make sacrifices? (If you are interested into more detailed Characters from the novel? then check out my X/Twitter: Qicklyyy to see some art i will do for the characters and world reddit:https://www.reddit.com/r/t5_dacvxc/s/zhi4itdNfN )

Omer has a knack for finding humor in the most unexpected places. From his witty comebacks to his lighthearted pranks, Omer's life is a whirlwind of laughter and surprises. But behind his sharp sense of humor lies a deeper story—one of resilience, self-discovery, and connection. "Joke With Omer" is a heartwarming tale that weaves comedy with moments of introspection, as Omer navigates the ups and downs of friendship, love, and the challenges that life throws his way. This book invites readers to see the world through Omer's unique lens, where every situation holds the potential for a laugh and a lesson. Whether it's turning everyday chaos into comedy or uncovering joy in the darkest moments, "Joke With Omer" is a celebration of the healing power of humor and the importance of never taking life too seriously.

Xoxo

Guys here is my pitch..... In the sprawling world of fantasy, we’ve often been treated to tales of heroes reincarnated with divine blessings, legendary powers, or cheat-like abilities, thrust into magical lands as shining saviors—or chaotic terrors. But what happens when the very concept of reincarnation becomes a curse? When the divine boon is a big fat joke, and the "cheat system" doesn’t quite… cheat? Enter John, the unluckiest reincarnate. Blessed by a god and thrust into a fantasy world, he dreams of glory, power, and adventure—only to wake up as a normal, utterly powerless bird. Not a mythical phoenix, not an ancient thunder eagle. Just… a bird. To make matters worse, this world is no ordinary realm. It's a land scarred by the devastating legacies of past isekai’d heroes and villains, whose reckless exploits piled skeletons into mountains and turned their cheats into harbingers of chaos. Fed up with these unruly intruders, the ancients of the realm banded together to create a world-shaking seal: all reincarnated souls are trapped in the bodies of harmless animals, confined to isolated sanctuaries that function more like fantasy zoos. Here’s the twist: this isn’t mercy. It’s a resource grab. The powerful beast tamers of this realm have turned these reincarnated souls into exotic pets, prized for their cheat-like potential. John finds himself at the bottom of the food chain in every sense. His cheat doesn’t work. His human form is gone. And his world is filled with predatory cultivators who see him as either a snack or a tool. But John isn’t one to give up so easily. What starts as despair quickly turns into cunning survival. With wings and wit as his only tools, John must navigate layers of misfortune, dodge fate’s sharp talons, and cheat his way through a world determined to keep him grounded. Get ready to join John on a wildly unconventional journey—one where reincarnation isn’t a ticket to greatness, but a death sentence he’s determined to rewrite. His story is one of humor, wit, and persistence, as he explores a world where he is the joke and his survival is the punchline. Main tags: reincarnation/isekai, beast taming cultivation system, comedy, action, adventure. Of course No-harem!

Elements is a story about two elementals, Nesaku and Kayin, as they try to protect Earth from the invasion of the chronolokians. As their the story progresses, they become stronger as more threats arise with the problem of Nesaku's fragments, portal breakouts across the omniverse, inner conflict between Earth's races and the secrecy of the Exo Organisation. Will this war end with the victory of earth, or will earth push through and survive.

Wishes are subjective, and those who are reborn are nothing but hypocrites unworthy of the first. Words crumble to ashes, and memories of their origins resonate within fractured bodies. Amid a dream that is no mere illusion but a radiant illumination, shadows grow deeper, and the truth reveals itself, a child’s dream begins. I woke up in a world of uncertainty, a realm twisted and cruel, where swords clash, blood stains the ground, and monstrous beasts stalk the living. Flying ships drift above boundless chains that shackle the sky, while wars rage endlessly with weapons both ancient and unknown. It’s a place where beauty and terror coexist, where joy flickers like a fragile flame before being consumed by shadow. I am Celm, a man whose memories feel like shards of glass, fractured, distant, and painful. I don’t know who I truly am or why this world feels both alien and hauntingly familiar. The forsaken lands around me pulse with disasters and despair, as people endure a cycle of torment they cannot escape. And yet, hidden within this chaos lies a haunting beauty, a world that shifts and bends under the weight of forgotten truths. In this labyrinth of suffering and wonder, whispers of the Forsaken World linger, a place where the truth is absolute, where the laws of other realms erode, and where even gods lose their divinity. Every step I take feels like a descent into something deeper, a dream interwoven with reality and riddled with secrets. What is my place in this nightmare? What lies at the heart of a dream so vivid it burns brighter than light itself? I don’t know where the path leads, but I do know one thing: the truth, however unbearable, cannot be avoided forever.

(Rebirth + Business warfare + Pampering spouse + Dog food) Investing today? I've got more important things to handle. Financial crisis? Not my problem; anyhow, I won't be losing money. Huh? This stone of yours is pretty nice, wait for a call at home! Xiao Ming closed the door, turned around, and took out a fist-sized diamond: "Honey, let's grind this into a ball for the kids to play with!"

First of all, don't expect anything very good. This is the first time I write such a novel and I use translation because English is not my native language. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- After the death of his parents, young Kael is sent to the palace, where he struggles with loneliness. Even though he is ostracized and despised in the palace where he was educated, the anger and determination within him make him stronger. One day, he encounters a secret conspiracy to save the princess and learns that she has been kidnapped by a shadowy organization. Kael sets out on a dangerous path to both save the princess and pursue the betrayal in the palace. However, this journey will not only offer him the opportunity to defeat his enemies, it will also lead him to find a lost piece. Can Kael win his battle for the throne, or will he forever lose a part of himself that was lost on his path to power?

En un mundo donde la compatibilidad del usuario con el Aetherium y la destreza despertada, puedes llegar a ser una persona con poder que te permita estar en la cima. Kael tiene dificultades para despertar su destreza, y junto a sus amigos, se vera involucrado en un lio que lo obligara a volverse fuerte para proteger a los suyos de quienes los persiguen.

Every Cultivation transmigrator would begin their journey with ignorance. Ye Chen, who was originally from Earth, unexpectedly transmigrated to the Fantasy world after crashing with Truck-Kun. Of course, like every Protagonist, he had a gold finger with a female seductive spirit in an ancient ring. But he also had many mysteries hidden beneath him, as he discovered on his great adventure. This was our protagonist's first journey: every attractive female fell over him with simply his sight, but there was another person. This pig-featured man was maliciously reincarnated into this fantasy world with the appearance of a third-rate villain, and he snatched all of the heroines as our protagonist flirted with other females. This story will be the epic clash between the Transmigrator and Reincarnator....... Tags- #Netori #Dark

In a world divided by power and blood, love is the deadliest game of all. Princess Seraphina has spent her life trapped within the gilded walls of royalty, a pawn in political alliances she never agreed to. Desperate for freedom, she dreams of a life beyond the throne—until one fateful night changes everything. Lorenzo De Luca, the infamous mafia heir, is a shadow feared by kings and criminals alike. Ruthless, enigmatic, and cold, he lives by one rule: loyalty above all.

“No matter what, never fall for the vampire king.” Kiara Whitman always knew her fate was twisted because she is the first hybrid, but things took a drastic turn when she was offered a contract marriage with the ruthless Valerian King. There was just one clause on the contract: "Falling for Adriel Valerian is equivalent to death.” But how could she follow such a clause? Her heart raced under his gaze, and when he spoke, her thoughts became foggy. It was clear as day that if the clause was meant to keep her alive, she wouldn’t survive. Unfortunately, Adriel, the vampire king, didn’t feel the same for her because he had his own plans for the hybrid princess; she was the key to everything he craved—his ultimate freedom from hell. He had sworn never to let himself fall for her because it would be messy; he had to be smart, vigilant, and stay in control. What will happen when Kiara finds out the real reason behind the contract marriage? Or when she discovers that she was just a tool for survival all along, just a possession to the vampire king and nothing less? Will she decide to leave for good or stay to find out her purpose? Or at least seduce the vampire king, if at all that’s possible.

Andrew and Holly didn’t know what they were getting into when they tried to use a demonic ritual to spice up their sex life. Now anyone they have sex with dies! and what’s worse is they have to kill someone this way once every thirteen days or they die. Do they value their own lives above the lives of countless others or will they accept their fate and spare the lives of countless people?

Shreedha, a formidable gangster who runs business in twelve countries , is at the pinnacle of power when someone her own stabbed her back. In a shocking twist , she transported to a different world completely different from her ethnicity. But a queen is queen no matter the situation or world. What kind of challenges does she face? Would she be able to adapt to this new world while hiding onto the core of who she really is or will the trials of the new reality forces her to undergo a profound transformation? Join Shreedha on her journey of self discovery where she finds out what does it truly mean to be a queen unbound.

Kys, Tsu, athex, art, demon, noob, failed, zahard, akkuzz, and ESCPECIALLY chocolates. And btw, ily my dear pookie why do i exist...

Eleanor Cecil life takes a wild turn when she meets the billionaire Maximum Griffin as her newly wed husband. a lot of tragedy starts to hit the couple before they could cultivate their love for each other. will they fall out of love Or will they survive it together?

There will be a point in one's life when an individual reaches rock bottom; where every path leads to nowhere, every dim light fades into nothingness; an overwhelming loneliness. It may arrive early; it may come late. The line of fate reaches all physical and non-physical beings. Everything is affected. There will come a time when one's too far deep into the mantle. The pressure crushing; shattering. Hot; the magma burning, seething. Then there's the core. The singular point of utter failure. A white magma of negativity; degradation; mental strain. A swirling heat of pain, loss. Self-destruction, end. It's pointless. Lost. At that point, that individual has nothing to lose. It will now solely depend on the individual and how they will respond to the situation they reside in. Will they attain glory from the fall, or die from the fall? It's an imminent doom every being created must face. An inevitable event that must take place.

|13X FEATURED · 2024 NANO WATT/ONC 2024 LONGLIST · AMBASSADORS' PICK| Two years after her older brother's tragic death, anxiety-stricken Maisie and her emotional support cat, Milo, attend the Disney College Program, where they must discover a new life meaning in the most magical place on Earth. *** The death changed everything. Milo, an orange tabby, has always wanted a little sibling, but after the tragic loss of his owner's older brother, adoption was put on hold, and he became her Emotional Support Animal. Now, two years later, Maisie's determined to grant Milo's long-overdue wish; however, she's still grieving and overthrown with anxiety, leaving Milo to tag along with her for the famed Disney College Program. Nevertheless, when heartbreak catches him, too, Milo must push past his grief to save himself and his wish. Maisie Claire is ready to move on but not prepared to leave her family after two years for the DCP. She would've never accepted that offer letter if it hadn't been for her parents helping her get an ESA. Now trapped in an unfamiliar world, Maisie must find a new life meaning while still keeping her brother's memory alive. It starts with discovering the courage to befriend her mysterious suitemate and thanking Milo for everything he's done. After all, sometimes moving on just takes a little bit of courage. *** *Prompt Used: #24-"A desperate wish, made from the heart, is always answered. Sooner or later.* *Based on a true story.* *Contains a subtle, LGBTQ+ subplot because of Disney's Inclusion Key, but it's not the main focus. However, please be respectful.*

Sophia Laurent is the secret heiress to one of the world’s wealthiest families, living a life of isolation and control under her father’s oppressive reign. Tired of being a pawn in her family's power games, Sophia escapes into the real world, adopting a fake identity to experience life as a normal woman. But her attempt at freedom takes an unexpected turn when she’s mistaken for a gold-digger during a blind date with Alexander "Xander" Hayes, a wealthy and cynical businessman. He believes she’s after his money, and his vulgar, dismissive attitude makes her want to walk away—fast. In a story filled with sparks, secrets, and unexpected twists, will love triumph over wealth, or will the past prove too strong to overcome?

Synopsis: On his 15th birthday, Aris’s peaceful life is torn apart when a mysterious fleet attacks his village. After narrowly escaping by diving into the cursed Lake Cyrus, a place where no one survives, Aris emerges in a dangerous and unfamiliar land. There, he discovers a hidden power that allows him to grow stronger with each battle. With a burning desire to become the strongest and master the path of cultivation, Aris embarks on a journey to transcend his limits and carve his own fate. In a world where power defines everything, Aris must navigate treacherous lands, face unimaginable threats, and uncover the secrets of the mysterious forces that shattered his world.

In the mysterious city of Berlin, where shadows hide more than secrets, the Stillburg family’s legacy is both a blessing and a curse. When a dark force tied to their bloodline resurfaces, a battle begins between loyalty, power, and survival. As alliances shift and betrayals cut deep, one question looms: how far would you go to protect what’s yours—when the cost might be your soul? Dive into a tale of mystery, power, and the haunting choices that shape destinies.

Embark on an exhilarating journey through a realm of swords and sorcery in "Cursing My Way Through The Heaven." When Xiao Han, a simpleton from 2024 Earth, unexpectedly transmigrates to a fantastical world dominated by immortal cultivation, he finds himself amidst a society driven by the relentless pursuit of celestial ascension. Raised in the slums of Beijing, Xiao Han was instilled with the strict family principle of refraining from profanity. Despite his efforts to adhere to this code, his inner thoughts often betrayed him. However, a fateful encounter with his high school peers leads to an alcohol-fueled outburst, breaking his long-held restraint with a string of expletives. "Shut... the... heck... up, you lot!" He swore at the top of his lungs. And suddenly, a strong suction force enveloped him from the sky and sucked his soul into it along with his voice and he lost consciousness. In the blink of an eye, Xiao Han awakens to find his soul inhabiting the body of a prince in the Han State, marking the beginning of an extraordinary odyssey. Gifted with a unique cheat system, he discovers that his curses, infused with genuine emotion, unlock potent rewards and abilities. As Xiao Han navigates this treacherous new world, readers will be swept into a gripping narrative interwoven with elements of intrigue, adventure, and self-discovery. --- Author's Note: While rooted in the context of China's Seven Warring States period, "Cursing My Way Through The Heaven" offers a captivating tale accessible to all, regardless of familiarity with historical events. Join Xiao Han in his quest for power, redemption, and transcendence. --- Key Elements in the Story 1. Full Action Pack: Prepare for thrilling and fast-paced sequences that will keep you on the edge of your seat. 2. Kingdom Building: Dive into detailed and immersive world-building with the rise and fall of kingdoms. 3. Deep Politics: Experience intricate political maneuvering, alliances, and betrayals. 4. No Harem and No Strong Censor Words: Focus on plot and character development without explicit content. 5. Slice of Life: Enjoy moments of everyday life that add depth and realism to the story. 6. Adventure: Embark on epic journeys and quests that take characters across varied landscapes. 7. Humor: Find light-hearted and funny moments to balance the intense action and drama. 8. Academy: Explore settings that include learning and training, likely with magical or combat elements. 9. Competition: Witness contests and rivalries challenging characters and driving the plot. 10. Dragons and Other Legendary Magical Beasts: Encounter mythical creatures that add a sense of wonder and danger to the world.

"Therefore said some of the Pharisees, This man is not of God, because he keepeth not the sabbath day. Others said, How can a man that is a sinner do such miracles? And there was a division among them." (John 9:16).