The Heavenly Miss Xiulan (Who Is Most Definitely Not a Boy)
In the 3,476th year of the Celestial Calendar, the Heavenly Emperor—whose divinity was rivaled only by his boredom—rewrote the Immortal Code of Gender Assignments during a particularly uneventful spring.
According to Clause 89, Subsection Moonlight, Paragraph Absolutely-Not-Optional, any being born with an overwhelmingly high-yin spiritual constitution could only, by universal decree, be classified as female.
It was simple. Efficient. Divine.
Except… someone made a mistake.
A mortal child was born deep within the darkest stretch of the Eternal Spirit Forest, surrounded by mist, mystery, and mushrooms that sang lullabies. He was bright-eyed, soft-voiced, high-yin… and very, very male.
The thunder cracked the day he laughed.
A white wolf howled. A snake offered him venom like warm milk.
The trees whispered ancient songs. And the heavens? Well, they began preparing lightning bolts on standby—just in case someone down there got too clever and said something like:
“Wait… is that a boy?”
Boom.
Thus began the most unusual cultivation tale in ten thousand realms.
A tale of a child raised by beasts, mistaken for a goddess, blessed with yin that could stop hearts, and cursed with thunder that would smite anyone who dared question the Heavenly Code.
This is the story of Xiulan.
Or as the forest calls him:
“Our beautiful, powerful, emotionally unstable daughter.”
Or as heaven calls him:
“ERROR 404: Gender Not Found.”
