Funniest Yo Momma Jokes Of All Time

# CALM # DECISIVEKILLS After “Renegade Immortal”, “Pursuit of the Truth”, “I Shall Seal the Heavens”, “A Will Eternal”, and “A World Worth Protecting”, this is Ergen’s sixth long-length novel, “Outside of Time”. Xu Qing’s world sank into deathly silence after the descendence of “God”. Master cultivators brought the human race and escaped the continent, and the remaining people struggled to survive. Every place that was met by “God’s” gaze had nearly all life forms wiped out. Young Xu Qing was lucky enough to survive. But in a world where ferocious beasts roamed and infighting was rampant within the human race, it was difficult to survive. “If cultivation doesn’t give me the power to fight against God, then I shall become God myself!” This is a story of how a human teenager became a god, step by step, to survive.

Stefania Hayden es una mujer de 25 años con una vida aparentemente tranquila y feliz, pero con muchos secretos que provienen de un pasado tormentoso. Un pasado que volverá a su vida, gracias a su proyecto más codiciado pero que luego llegara con más fuerza, cuando ella comience a recordar cosas que había olvidado por culpa del accidente que sufrió hace diez años atrás. Recuerdos que la llevaran a investigar para descubrir verdades que le fueron negadas desde su infancia y que la llevaran hacer justicia, una justicia que no tuvo ni ella ni su madre en su momento y que gracias a la posición que tiene ahora podrá intentar conseguirlo. Pero su camino no será nada fácil, porque tendrá que enfrentar sus más profundos miedos y enfrentar a las personas que más le hicieron daño, en especial su verdadera familia. Dándose cuenta de que nadie es lo que parece, pero aún así, estará dispuesta hacer lo que sea necesario para que los culpables caigan sin imaginarse tampoco que el amor de su vida que conoció desde pequeña volverá a hacerse presenta y que al igual que ella, él sentía lo mismo o lo siente aún después de creerla muerta por diez años...

Reborn into something new and in a new world, Morgana found herself with no memories about her past. She lost them when a powerful entity took pity on her and offered her the chance to be reborn in her own primitive world. A letter left by her past self told her about... well, nothing really. The old Morgana was glad when she learned that she would lose her memory due to being reborn as part of this deal. She accepted without hesitation, especially after the powerful entity explained everything in detail. “WHAT!” Morgana exclaimed, reading the letter. “We’re both BIG perverts! And what do you mean by spreading my legs and pushing out many babies?” “EXPLAIN!” Reborn with stunning silver hair, crimson eyes, and a Futa, Morgana now belonged to a new race called Breeder. Follow the journey of Morgana as she tries to survive in this primitive world, with a LOT of Breeding. … [Warning: This story contains heavy R-18 sexual content, including pregnancy, futanari, Incest, breeding, and more. Read at your own risk.] Support: patreon.com/Midnight_Paradox Discord: https://discord.gg/NBqGDtmxnp

"Everyone has their own story to tell. From trauma to triumph, there is always an experience that defines how a person acts. There is nobody in this world who we can truly say has nothing to tell about themselves, after all, what are we defined by if not the tales of our greatest moments, the remembrances of people who created our childhoods? When we look at our pasts, often we think from our own perspectives. We talk about the mistakes we made, the things we didn't know, but even if we look back on what we did with regret I don't think we can truly say that we made the wrong choice. We simply don't understand our story anymore. This is something I've only learned recently." - The Third

Guardian of Time Auteur: Colinh45 Once an ordinary man, Isaac is reborn as the Guardian of Time, tasked with protecting history itself. Guided by the ancient Kronos, he travels across eras—learning from master builders in ancient Egypt and artists like Leonardo da Vinci during the Renaissance. Each journey deepens his knowledge and leaves traces of his legend, subtly woven into human history. As Isaac collects artifacts and wisdom, he dreams of building a sanctuary to honor the past. But mastering time’s power means grappling with questions of purpose, legacy, and the delicate balance of history. With each era, Isaac grows closer to becoming a true Guardian, crafting a legacy that echoes through eternity. ============================================= Thank you for joining me on this journey with Isaac and Kronos! As this is my first book, I’m still exploring and trying new things in my writing. If there’s anything you didn’t enjoy or think I could do better, I’d love to hear your advice. If you’ve been enjoying the story, please consider giving a Power Stone or leaving a quick review. Your feedback means a lot to me and helps shape what’s to come. Thanks for reading, and I hope to keep exploring the threads of time together!

“Who is the football GOAT?” A question that has been asked countless times in the last decade. Is it Cristiano Ronaldo or Lionel Messi? To be fair, the question actually depended on what one wanted from a player as they were two different people and they played differently from the other. This was also the case with every other legendary player to grace the game. As a diehard fan of the game, Jason Bolu also had someone he thought to be the goat, but unlike most people, he harbored the desire to not only become as great as them, but even greater than any legend that ever graced the game. He wanted to become the Greatest Of All Legends… the GOAL. Unfortunately, fate has never cared about people’s hopes and dreams, and just like every other unfortunate human, she hit him hard across the face with a broken reality and sent him flying in another direction from his goal, yet he didn’t give up and continually persevered but, in the end, he didn’t ever make it. He wasn’t even halfway near his goal. He thought it was over… but it wasn’t. He got another chance at his dreams, and this time he was going to do more than his best to achieve his dream. *disclaimer* There is no system or cheats, just plain hard work and a past life of experience.. Also, despite the use of real-life characters, places and things, this is an artistic creation in which things wouldn't be as they are in real life so don't be surprised at some things that are unrealistic and out of place e.g. exact details, attitude of characters etc. This is a slow-paced novel. Join my discord channel and let's have fun together... link below, https://discord.com/invite/QpbCdNZW

A group of Spec Ops operators are saved from the jaws of death by the intervention of the Supreme Law of Time. After waking from a coma, the team's leader finds himself bound to an alien symbiote. And thanks to the symbiote, the team is thrust into the hidden world of Will awakeners; individuals who use their Will to harness superhuman abilities. As if that wasn't bad enough, the team accidentally uncover a conspiracy by a powerful shadow organisation which then puts them in the central position in the fight against the organisation and their nefarious plans for the world. Thus, begins the journey of the Soldiers chosen by Time!

Through times beyond oblivion, the first beings arose thus creating the megaverse. Since then 334 aeras have passed, many beings struck the heavens, and tales of myths and tragedies spread throughout. This is the tale of a boy who tried to strike gods.

The power of absolute control... Time. After Rock died, he mysteriously reincarnated in Shun Long's almost dead body when a triangular-shaped rock merged with his soul, and a sudden influx of information flooded his head. He has now found himself in a mystical world filled with extraordinarily powerful cultivators who can destroy mountains with a single punch, and split seas in half with a single slash of a sword! This is Shun Long's journey in the majestic world of cultivation, as he fights geniuses and reaches the pinnacle of both alchemy and martial arts!

Mia castro, a cheerful, carefree, clumsy girl and the most beautiful flower in all of Crystallia, was told by her father, one day to go to Arcanador centre of magic, her very sister's dream, but it wasn't to learn magic. Mia didn't even have any cultivation since the day she was born. She was surprised to find out that it was to tempt Tavon knight for a heirloom, the most handsome, powerful but kind of an abomination mage. Mia eventually met him and happen to also find out his big secret, which no one knew. "I will keep your secret if you agree to be my master" she said, nervously, hoping her words didn't offend him. "You are lucky, you don't have your head on a platter" Tavon sneered in his demon form. WARNING: MATURE CONTENT] "I love you, dangerously!" Can Mia be able to tame Tavon? Will she get her father's mission completed, without having to die like a chicken? PS: This is my entry for WSA2024 : Trust me, you are going to enjoy the ride. This novel also happen to contain gory content, there's no rape.

In the ancient city of Qingzhen, Shi Yi, a determined witch hunter, dedicates his life to eradicating the Wuyi witches. Just as he is on the verge of defeating their powerful leader, she curses him with immortality, forcing him to endure the heart-wrenching loss of his loved ones as they age and die around him. Initially viewing the curse as a cruel joke, Shi Yi soon comes to understand the tragic reality of his eternal existence. Desperate to escape his unending suffering, Shi Yi embarks on a quest to find the legendary Wuyi clan sword, the only weapon capable of ending his life. His journey leads him to an old man who reveals that he must locate the descendant of the Wuyi clan to wield the sword's power. A century later, Shi Yi encounters a young girl on the brink of suicide, whom he saves, suspecting she may be the descendant he seeks. To draw her closer, he rescues her from an abusive family, offering her protection and a safe haven. In return, he asks her to learn the sword's power and ultimately take his life. This sets the stage for a complex relationship intertwined with fate, sacrifice, and the quest for freedom, as both characters navigate their intertwined destinies and the heavy burden of their choices.

Bayezid was just your average man. Average personality , average looks , average intelligence , average job and pretty much average everything. One day he was suddenly summoned to an entirely different world by some mages whose liege was suddenly in a predicament and was at the verge of losing his entire kingdom. The mages wanted him to help... The world was very huge , almost the size of the unobservable universe. No one had explored beyond the skies as the skies themselves were infinite. He was summoned to a petty continent in the world called Aurelius meaning golden. Maybe this part of the world was just a part of the entire unobservable universe which was countless times more expansive than the observable universe? or was it just another universe altogether? Maybe only time would tell all the answers , as it usually does....

Dive into a novel about the rise of a legendary sportsman. Follow Zachary Bemba on his journey to become the G.O.A.T (Greatest Of All Time) in the soccer world. He travels back to a time in his past where opportunity abounds. Access to a system capable of propelling him to greater heights is just the icing on the cake. From a nobody born in one of the poorest and most remote places on the planet, he relentlessly pursues his goal of becoming the greatest sportsman the world has ever seen. **** ---- G.O.A.T SYSTEM INITIALIZING ---- ACTIVATION SUCCESSFUL **** My Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/Mujunel_the_Mystic Book Discord Link: https://discord.gg/NK4Uaw8GRN

In a world in a distant universe similar to ours, dragons were the supreme rulers for millions of years. But one day, a supernova struck their planet, making it uninhabitable for hundreds of thousands of years and killing almost all life on its surface. When the catastrophe ended, the decimated dragons struggled to recover, while other races rose up and became the new rulers, hunting the surviving dragons and forcing them to retreat away from civilization. The dragons fell back into bestiality and violence, regressing further and further until they were little more than animals. Now, dragons are a species on the verge of extinction, and nothing would seem able to change their fate... or maybe not? Haku, one of the youngest member of a dying species that struggle to survive, refuses this. He decides it's not right to surrender to the rules of that difficult and terrible world into which he had the misfortune to be born, and he doesn't want his brothers and sisters to do it either. He believes that there must be something else, some other way to live without fear. So, let's follow the journey of Haku and his siblings, a journey that will take them across the world and beyond, against a fate that none of them is willing to accept.

The sky shattered like glass, raining down shards of time that forever altered Aethoria. In the aftermath of this cosmic cataclysm, known as the Shattering, a select few were cursed—or blessed—with the ability to manipulate time itself. Among them is Elden Vortis, who never sought such power. Caught in the tangled threads of time, Elden must learn to harness his abilities while navigating a reality teetering on the edge of collapse. But Elden isn't alone. A sinister force is hunting those with temporal powers, their motives hidden in the shadows. As visions of possible futures plague him, Elden finds himself at the center of a cosmic game, pursued by enemies he barely comprehends. With the clock ticking—and sometimes stopping—he must uncover the truth about his abilities and his family's mysterious past. With unlikely allies by his side—each harboring secrets of their own—Elden races against a clock that doesn't always tick forward.

"I, who was once the King of the Seven Kingdoms, hailed as the strongest of all men, now find myself trapped in the body of a loser—and, to add insult to injury, a rapist. The fact that I can't just buff up this pathetic body with a bit of exercise and become strong again is another cruel twist of fate. Why, you ask? Because I can't use the very magic that people in this world rely on. Tsk, how on earth am I supposed to regain my former glory now? Guess I'll have to get creative with this 'loser' body of mine."

Valerie, the daughter of the murdered Alpha of the Yellow Stone Pack, could never lead the pack because she had a Luna wolf. Her mate, Tristan, was made the Alpha in her stead. After assuming the title of Alpha, Valerie was set up and brutally rejected, not only by Tristan but also her whole pack, and her kid sister, Scarlet, with whom Tristan had secret affairs. “I reject Luna Valerie as my mate. She was caught in bed with a stranger, meaning that she would sell the pack out. The punishment for treachery is death,” Alpha Tristan announced heartlessly. The chants from the pack members and visiting Alphas who had come for the Alphas' conference attracted them to the judgment. No one thought that Alpha Denzel, whose name caused the hairs on their skin to stand straight due to his ruthlessness, would make it to the conference. Valerie found hope when she realized that Alpha Denzel was her second chance mate, but painstakingly, she was rejected once again. The double rejection caused her to lose her wolf, and she was condemned to die by all the Alphas present. She thought her fate was sealed when Alpha Denzel left and a warrior was ready to execute her. Everyone was shocked when Alpha Denzel suddenly turned around. “Stop! The treacherous daughter of a late Alpha should not be killed. More suffering awaits her,” he declared. Valerie’s heart dropped when she saw his dark look, which was like a bottomless pit, as she blacked out from exhaustion. A few months down the line, there was a war among the Alphas as they began to lay claim to the two-times-rejected Luna. With her wolf dead, will the moon goddess be gracious to give her another wolf? And which Alpha would be able to melt her now cold heart?

My name is Renzou. When I was a child, people always called me strange. I don’t know why—maybe it was because I was different from everyone else. But my grandmother… she always said, “You’re a good kid,” and made me feel like everything was okay. I didn’t have a family. My grandmother found me abandoned in the forest years ago and raised me. When I turned 15, I lost her. From that day on, I was alone. I was sad, but somehow, life went on. I stayed in the temple where my grandmother had lived until I was 18. At first, things were manageable, but over time, everything started to change. The food lost its taste, and no matter how much I ate, I could never feel full. During those days, the strange voices I used to hear as a child grew louder. They always said the same thing: “I’m hungry…” One night, everything happened all at once. The ground beneath me cracked, and a blinding light appeared. In the blink of an eye, a portal opened and pulled me in. When I came to, I was in a completely different place. Crumbling buildings, gigantic monsters fighting one another… everything was pure chaos. I had no idea where I was, but one thing was clear—I had to survive.

In the bustling streets of Delhi, 16-year-old Ravi discovered something about himself that would change his life forever. Born and raised in the heart of the city, Ravi always felt a deep connection to the culture and history of the Rajputs, the warrior caste of Hinduism known for their bravery and loyalty. One day, while exploring the ancient temples and ruins scattered throughout the city, Ravi stumbled upon a group of priests performing a sacred ceremony. Mesmerized by the ritualistic chants and colorful offerings, he felt a sense of belonging wash over him. It was then that he realized he was meant to be a part of this ancient religion that had shaped the history of his people. As Ravi delved deeper into the teachings of Hinduism, he discovered a world filled with gods and goddesses, legends and myths, and a profound sense of spirituality that resonated with his soul. He spent hours studying sacred texts and meditating in quiet temples, seeking guidance and enlightenment from the divine. But as Ravi immersed himself in his newfound faith, he also uncovered a mystery that would challenge his beliefs and shake the foundations of his faith. Dark whispers of ancient curses and long-forgotten secrets haunted his dreams, leading him on a dangerous quest to unravel the truth behind the legends of the Rajputs. With each step he took, Ravi's resolve grew stronger, fueled by his unwavering faith and determination to uncover the mysteries of his heritage. As he delved deeper into the shadows of the past, he discovered that the true power of Hinduism lay not in ancient rituals or sacred traditions, but in the strength and courage of those who dared to challenge destiny and forge their own path. And so, as Ravi stood at the crossroads of fate, he knew that he had found his true calling as a warrior of the spirit, bound by the timeless bond of faith and destiny that had guided his ancestors for generations. And as he embraced his newfound identity as a Hindu, he knew that his journey had only just begun, filled with mystery, adventure, and the eternal promise of enlightenment.

All shades of story is a variety of stories put together, it has many books of different genres and characters and each one will have a favorite BOOK ONE: Love my heart BOOK TWO: love bound

Not being a hero isn't the issue. The only problem I'm facing right now is surviving in this world!

A man living in modern-day India, Kashi, is suddenly and brutally killed by some unknown forces and is reborn in Hindu mythology, during an era when a great war took place among the gods. { If You Want To Support me Upi id - heronerd54@okaxis }

Red_Blizzard: DRAGOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!!!!!! TankDragon_72: LLLLLLLLLL imagine losing to me LOLOLOLOL TWICE IN A ROW!!!! Red Blizzard: STFU you little sh*t! next time is payback! Ur going come crying to me when next month's results comes out!!!! Two of the top ranked players in the world had a long history of fighting for first place in the game called, The Legends Of Alethea. A game that has tens and millions of concurrent players daily and they stood at the top. The two legends that are on the top of Alethea, were currently in a predicament. They reincarnated as the main characters of the game. TankDragon becoming Theodore Ignatius and Red Blizzard becoming Selene Aventus, two characters that are destined to die, because choosing one would lead the other to die. Better yet the world was going to be on the brink of extinction! Watch as the two rivals and nemesis work together, trying to survive and save their new loved ones. Of course, the two are also tied into an arranged marriage. How are they going to deal with that or use it to their advantage?

Hace 500 millones de años. Periodo Cámbrico. Dios descendió sobre la tierra bárbara más antigua y los mares primitivos. Él es el principio de todo, creó la sabiduría y la vida, es el Creador de todos los seres vivientes. Con el paso del tiempo, las historias se convierten en Epopeyas, las Epopeyas en Mitos y finalmente los Mitos quedan enterrados con los años. Pero... Sólo Dios es Eterno. *** Descargo de responsabilidad: todos los personajes, escenarios, etc. públicamente reconocibles son propiedad de sus respectivos dueños. No se pretende infringir los derechos de autor. Está no es mi obra, sino una traducción de la obra china: 我就是神

Title: Time's Fist: strength is all that matters Synopsis: In a world where fate can be rewritten through sheer willpower, one man is given the chance to correct a tragic past. When an enigmatic force grants him a mysterious, all-powerful boxing system, he finds himself back in the gymnasium of his middle school, a place brimming with both nostalgia and unfinished business. The scent of sweat and old wood fills the air, but time is not on his side. His mission? To stop the man who would become his greatest enemy: Jack. Once a friend and ally, Jack is destined to rise as a ruthless criminal mastermind, leading a violent Gang that will ultimately end in the brutal death of the protagonist. But this time, he has the upper hand. Armed with the ability to harness the strength of legendary boxers and the mastery of techniques passed down through time, he must fight not only against Jack’s growing power but also his own doubts about whether he can truly change the course of history. Each punch he throws, each fight he wins, brings him closer to the moment where his enemy’s fate could be sealed—but at what cost? As he steps into the ring of his past, every battle is more than a fight for survival; it's a war for his future and his identity. Will he be able to rewrite history and save the life that was taken from him, or will he become a pawn in the hands of destiny? In Time's Fist, the past is a battleground, and every strike could change everything. But there more to the story a great twist read to find out

Blueprints of Time tells the captivating story of Ling Wei, a talented architect from modern times. While working on a renovation project for a centuries-old landmark, she stumbles upon mysterious blueprints that transport her back to an ancient era—though it's a parallel world unlike any she has known. Upon her arrival in this new world, Ling Wei faces a series of challenges. Lost and disoriented, she is mistaken for a young man due to her appearance. Embracing this misconception for convenience, she navigates the unfamiliar landscape and finds refuge in Dragon's Edge Woodcutters, a thriving woodcutting business owned by the resilient and beautiful Wu Meifen. Wu Meifen, a young single mother and determined businesswoman, is immediately captivated by Ling Wei, who she believes to be a resourceful young man. For Ling Wei, it is love at first sight. Despite the initial confusion and the secrets they both harbor, a bond begins to form between them. Amidst the bustling life of Dragon's Edge Woodcutters, Ling Wei and Wu Meifen agree to a marriage of convenience—Meifen for the stability and father figure Ling Wei can provide for her son, and Ling Wei for the chance to stay close to the woman she loves. As they work side by side, their relationship deepens through shared struggles, tender moments, and the slow burn of mutual attraction. Interwoven with their daily lives are the enigmatic blueprints that brought Ling Wei to this world. As she unravels their secrets, Ling Wei discovers that her journey through time is part of a greater destiny that ties her to Wu Meifen and the legacy of the woodcutting business. Blueprints of Time is a romantic tale that blends historical intrigue with the endearing anecdotes of two women from different worlds finding love against all odds. With each passing day, Ling Wei's pursuit of Wu Meifen's heart reveals the timeless blueprint of love, etched across the ages. ○○○○○ As Wu Meifen emerged from Ling Wei's small cabin, retying the sash of her outer shirt, she found herself face-to-face with her aunt, Wu Chen's wife, and her cousin, Zhang Mingyi. Zhang Mingyi's eyes widened in shock. "Why are you coming out from there?" Her aunt, already letting her imagination run wild, gasped, "Xiao Fen, you?!" At that exact moment, Ling Wei followed Meifen out, still fumbling with her own disheveled outerwear. "Ms. Wu, you don't have to—" Ling Wei began, intending to tell Meifen she felt much better and didn’t need further assistance. But she stopped short when she noticed Meifen standing stock-still, her eyes locked on her aunt and cousin, who were staring at them in disbelief. Sensing the brewing storm and the potential for scandal, Wu Meifen swiftly took control of the situation. "It's exactly what Auntie thinks," she declared, her voice steady. "And I have come to agree to this marriage." "You!!" The exclamation came in unison, filled with shock and disbelief. Wu Meifen's aunt and cousin were left speechless, their minds racing to comprehend the sudden revelation. Meanwhile, Ling Wei, caught off guard, stood 70% confused and 30% bewildered, her heart racing as she processed what had just happened. Had her crush just proposed to her, albeit indirectly? The thought sent a thrill through her, mingling excitement with the lingering confusion.

June Dylan spent half of her life in prison for a crime she didn’t commit. Seventeen years behind bars, a lifetime really, her children’s whole life. Determined to make up for all the time lost, she moves back to the town that had opened the gate to hell all those years ago. Thomas Oswald is cursed. Cursed to love that woman with every fiber of his being and seventeen years apart didn’t change that fact. However she wants nothing to do with him now. Fortunately, they have two children together whom have her entire devotion.

Adam and his friend are just playing Terra,the new Immersive MMORPG that is released by Humanity Group to be rich. That is until Adam accidently gain something in the game that can give him immense power but at the same time brought him into trouble that might cause chaos between realities

Her life is like a nightmare. At a young age, she had to sit behind bars, accused of murdering his lover. A life sentence destroyed her future. However, behind bars, she finds the strength to survive and a surprising truth. An unexpected incident reunites her with the figure who was the mastermind behind her punishment.