Grandpa Ate Paint

Qiao Nian lived in the Qiao family’s house for 18 years before her biological parents found her. Suddenly, all the wealthy families in the city knew that the Qiao family had a fake daughter! A true daughter of an affluent family would be talented, gentle, and kind. A fake daughter would not be able to pick up any skills and accomplish nothing. Everyone wanted to see how miserable she would become when she went back to her ravine after being kicked out of a rich family! Qiao Nian also thought that her biological parents were poor teachers from Luohe County. Who knew that her brother drove a Phaeton that was worth three hundred thousand yuan! Her biological father was also a professor who taught at Tsinghua University! The big boss of the family of scums became a bootlicker and bowed in front of her grandpa… Qiao Nian was dumbfounded. Erm… this wasn’t the same as saying yes! After being freed from the family of scums, Qiao Nian was able to be herself. She was the top student in the college entrance examination, a live broadcast star and the heir of an invaluable cultural heritage… Her identities were revealed and when she started to appear on the hot searches in the city, the family of scums turned green. The anti-fans mocked: What’s the point of trying to fake an image? Aren’t you just sticking to my brother everyday? Qiao Nian responded: I’m sorry but I already have a match. Top Brother: @Qiao Nian. Let me introduce her to everyone. This is my sister. Wealthy Grandpa: My dear granddaughter, why are you working so hard? If you want a bicycle, grandpa will buy it for you! The rich and powerful in Beijing spread a rumor that Master Wang was hiding a wife in his luxurious house. No matter how much people tried to persuade him, he never took her out to meet anyone. If he were asked, he would say the same sentence. “My wife is from the countryside and she is shy.” That was until one day when someone saw the noble and cold Master Wang holding a girl’s slender waist while hiding in a corner of a wall and muttering with red eyes. “Baby, when will you give me a title?” [Fake daughter who is from a truly wealthy family] + [Two big bosses]

When there were strange signs in the sky, there must be demons lurking. Li Mo, who had studied antiques since he was young, had a strange change in his eyes after being struck by lightning. With a pair of divine eyes, he gained the ability to see through things and sense objects. He bought a gourd bottle for 500 yuan at a flea market and sold it for 230,000 yuan. A painting he casually bought turned out to be a genuine work by Xu Beihong, worth thirty to forty million yuan. The black double-eared bottle that came with the purchase of a set of gold jewelry turned out to be a genuine possession of the Ming imperial family. Ancient bronze ware, exquisitely crafted porcelain, calligraphy and painting with bold and vigorous strokes, and thrilling gambling stones came one after another. From then on, Li Mo's life underwent a revolutionary change. "I have divine eyes, and there are no treasures in the world that can escape my sight."

Mia is plunged into a terrifying mystery when a white rose, left as a chilling threat, leads her down a rabbit hole of secrets surrounding a missing woman named Elara and a reclusive man, Jason. Driven by a relentless need to understand the connection between them, Mia investigates, navigating cryptic online forums and risking a dangerous return to Jason's eerie, silent home. There, she uncovers hidden journals and photographs that paint a tragic portrait of Jason's past: Elara, his muse, vanished, leaving him haunted by "shadows" and broken promises. A photograph reveals a potential lead – "The Crimson Theatre" – but Mia's investigation has not gone unnoticed. A shadowy figure, who sent the threatening rose, knows she's searching for answers. Now, Mia must escape, knowing she's been drawn into a dangerous game where the shadows are closing in.

A famous painter's secrets are hidden in his artwork, but when a ghostwriter is hired to analyze his paintings, she uncovers a dark past that could destroy him-and everything she thought she knew about love.

A young boy, Kaden Benjamin, rather known as Kaden, lived with his grandparents for most of his life. His grandfather, Willie Sanders Benjamin, was a well-renowned scientist, while his grandmother worked at his office as his grandpa's personal secretary. But one day his whole life changed.

"what happened to this world"a boy said"run away akamatsu"someone else said as a monster ate him"no......not him why"monsters are all over Tokyo this is a very hard world .if a monster dies a rebirth of another monster will arrive at the same place,but why is this happening is there someone that wished for this to happen.will this mysterious boy named akamatsu find out

Ethan Cross was just a broke university student, juggling part-time delivery jobs and barely making ends meet. To make things worse, his girlfriend dumped him for a rich guy, calling him "a loser with no future." But fate had other plans. On a whim, he bought an old painting at an auction for $50, not knowing it would change his life forever. That painting was once the most treasured possession of Alexander Langford, the world's richest man who had just passed away. And in his will, Langford made a shocking decision: Whoever bought the painting would inherit his entire fortune. Now, Ethan is the heir to a trillion-dollar empire, with mansions, private jets, elite companies, and more money than he can ever spend. But wealth comes with its own dangers—rival corporations, underground syndicates, and even secret cults want him dead. To make matters more complicated, Langford’s final wish was for Ethan to marry his only daughter, Myra Langford—a cold and mysterious beauty with a past of her own. With power beyond imagination, enemies lurking in the shadows, and a woman he can’t understand, Ethan must navigate this new world while keeping his true strength hidden. From rags to royalty… his reign has just begun.

Eva, an eighteen year old girl, is the daughter of two influential pastors of God's will ministry, one of the most successful churches in the world. Her entire life has always revolved around the church, and she yearns for the freedom to do whatever she wants without being held back by the expectations of being two pastors daughter. Her family moves to a new country due to a promotion, and there she meets Keith Johnson, her hot neighbor, whose window is too close to hers, and she can't resist spying on. God then assigns her the almost impossible task of showing him the light, as Keith shows her glimpses of what she secretly wants but is too scared to pursue. She quickly realizes that the devil doesn't always come with horns, sometimes, he comes in the form of the unbeliever next door trying to break her faith.

Would you avenge your parent's if they were killed? Even if it was by a more powerful force? That;'s the question that plagued Rai Takeru as he watched his grandpa, his only family, die. As only a level 1 blood blade user, Rai sets out on a journey to get stronger and avenge his Grandfather.

Dustin Williams, Hailed throughout reality as Celestial Dustin, The King of Everything is done and dusted with life, having fufilled everything he set out to do painting himself to reality like painting on a canvas, he then writes down his autobiography, to inform and inspire future generations, he has seen his wars, countless wars, his bloodline has expanded and prospered throughout the cosmos for eons, but even an immortal being has an ending, but with his last moments he shares to us the tale of his rise to glory, Will you read it?

Sunz was born with an unknown ability given only a sword from birth but had no idea of what to do, until one faithful day his ability got reawakened and it's his choice to live his old life or explore his new one with the help of his friend Jihu. At first, Sunz was invited by Jihu to see his Grandpa's tournament in Korea. But the invitation as a Visitor soon changed to an invitation as a Contestant. Now having a chance to compete at Jihu's Grandpa's tournament to find the next member of the Water Clan. But to have a chance at competing in the tournament Sunz needs to win against one of the Inspector. Even if he can defeat the Inspector, can he defeat the other Contestants, who are there for the same reward? An inexperienced nobody joining the World of Experts. Can he survive or will he die without achieving ANYTHING?

Venus Archilles Gray, a consistent honor student and a volleyball varsity from Silverleaf University. Venus has been struggling a lot due to lack of a support system ever since childhood not until she moved into SLU. Venus met her two friends who were both extroverts and that made Venus trust people. She entered 12th grade without Kizealla and Lia since they all entered different strands. Because of volleyball practice, she had a chance to still get along with her friends. But one day, Venus and the whole volleyball team ate dinner at Venus' place and that became the main reason to get close with Lhieon Khaizer Rivera, the boy's volleyball team ace.

Grandpa: Dead Everyone else: Alive Shun Mi's life sucked. His life could be described as a series of unfortunate events, but he tried to stay positive. He wasn't raised by Ocelots, he had known love from his grandfather, and he had an ever-growing catalog of insults. Things could be worse. Then, on the first second of Shun's 18th birthday, his grandfather's greatest birthday present opened. A portal to another world and a challenge. A challenge for Shun to make something of himself. To make a difference in both worlds and avoid taking the easy way out. And, of course, a challenge for Shun to survive doing so.

At the age of thirty-three and ready to get married, Maya received the shocking news that her sister, Zahra, is pregnant. Unfortunately, at a time when her family was on the brink of destruction, Maya had to swallow a bitter pill because the man who had impregnated Zahra was Ilham, Maya's own boyfriend. Disappointed, of course. Desperate, don't even ask. Between life and death, Maya tries to rise and rebuild her life. Until finally, she met Grandpa Joshua, an elderly man at the nursing home where she worked. Who gave her a new perspective on the world and inadvertently brought Maya together with Johan, the man who rekindled the dreams in her heart?

Good day. Ako nga pla si Rein. Tisoy, 24 yrs old na ako ngayon 5'7 ang height at slim body may itsura nalaban sa pageant. ang kwentong ito ay hango sa karanasan ko mula nung 10 yrs old palang ako. Bata palang ako nun alam ko na sa sarili Kong may kakaiba sa akin.Ang tawag nila sa akin ay Rein Tisoy. Dahil sa may lahi akong American Pero dko nakilala si Papa na nakilala ni mama sa Olongapo. Andito na ako ngaun sa Bukid kasama ng lola at lolo ko sa Zambales. Masabi ko naman na marangya buhay namin kasi may mga katulong kami sa bahay at kasama na dun si kuya Caloy (Matangkad, Gwapo at Maskulado at Moreno ang nagparanas Sakin ng ligaya at sakit). Ang mama ko kasi ay Nasa US na at nakapag asawa ng U.S citizen na Pinoy din naman. Inaantay lng nila ako makatapos ng pagaaral at kukunin din dun. Tanghali na ako nagising dahil Gabi na kami nakauwi nila lola galing sa Kasal. Pang baba ko sa Sala dumeretso na ako sa kusina dun kasi malapit ang CR. Paglabas ko ng CR tinanong ako ni manang Anie (kasambahaya namin) kung gusto ko daw ba ng sinangag. Tumango nalang ako at wala pako sa wisyo at kagigising ko. Habang hinahanda ni Manang ang pagkain ko umupo ako sa Mesa at Dali akong tinimplahan ng gatas ni ate. Sa kinauupuan ko nahagip ng mata ko sa bintana na may lalakeng nakatakip ng kamiseta ang mukha habang nagpuputol ng Malagong halaman sa Hardin. Nakasandong manipis at Shorts na pangbasketball. namangha ako sa katawan nito dahil sa taglay nitong hulma. "Ate sino po Yong naglilinis sa Hardin" tanong ko Kay ate Anie. "Ah yan ba, si Caloy yan anak ni Mang Goryo Jan sa kabilang bahay" sagot ni ate Anie. "Te sya na bago boy nila lolo?'' tanong ko. "Ngayong bakasyon lang, nagaaral pa yan sa senior high si Caloy incoming grade 12 sa pasukan" paliwanag ni ate Anie. "Pupunta na nga pla ako sa palengke soy (nickname ko pinaikling Tisoy). Mamayang 10 am pakidalhan nalang si Caloy ng Meryenda, may kakanin at Suman Jan sa ref. "Opo Te ingat po" sagot ko. Wala pang 10 am Pero inasikaso ko kaagad ang Meryenda ni kuya Caloy dala na din ng excitement. Dumako na ako agad sa likod ng bahay kung San ko narinig na may nagtatabas ng mga Malagong halaman. Papalapit pa lang ako, titig na titig na ako sa katawan ni kuya Caloy. "Kuya Good Morning po. Magmeryenda ka po muna" inilapag ko sa papag ang pagkain. Narinig naman ako nito at tumango. "Good morning sir Rein. Ako po si Caloy bago ninyong boy." pakilala nito at tinanggal ang kamisetang nakabalot sa mukha. Namangha ako sa istura ni kuya Caloy 17 palang sya Pero para syang batang version ni EJ Falcon. mukhang mabait si kuya Caloy. Umupo sya at NASA gitna namin ang suman at kakanin. Nagtanggal sya ng Damit pangitaas kitang kita ko ang kabuoan ng katawan Nia na nagpapawis may abs at pormadong dibdib. Kaka-kain ko lang ng almusal Pero parang nagutom ako Uli. "Kuya Bale uwian ka po ba or stay-in ka po" tanong ko. "Stay-in ako dto sir, para may kasama daw po Kau ni ate Anie habang nasa hospital si lolo mo yan kasi bilin Sakin ng lola Mila mo'' paliwanag nito. "Kuya wag mo na po akong tawaging sir. Rein nlng po." Sabi ko. "Hahahaha" " Cge pla rein." patawang sagot nito. nakita ko ang mga ngiti ni kuya Caloy mas lalo itong nagpagwapo sakaniya. Pinagmamasdan ko sya habang kumakain sabay tingin nito Sakin at ngiti. napaiwas nlng ako ng tingin baka mailang si kuya Caloy Sakin ngunit alam Kong nahuli Nia akong nakatitig saknya. "Rein wala ka bang inumin Jan" tanong nito. " Ay kuya oo nga po Pla, ano pong gusto mo" tanong ko. "Ikaw" sagot Niya. "Ako po" mejo nagulat na may kilig. "Oo ikaw, ikaw ang bahala Pero kung may beer pwedi Nadin hahahaha". pabiro nitong bilin and Dali Dali akong kumuha ng Coke Casalo. Pagbalik ko habang nilalagyan ko ng Coke ang baso ni kuya tumayo ito at magtanggal ng short at boxer shorts nlng ang natirang suot. Muli itong umupo at tinaas ang paa sa papag na upuan at sumandal. "Rein boxer short muna ako hah ang init kasi dibale tayo lang naman dito.

In the world where appearances are everything, where beauty and success defines one's worth, two souls navigating their lives under veils of perfection. To the outside world, there life was peaceful and as flawless as picture painted with smile and wealth. But behind there mask, both carried pain; A pain of betrayal, Hatred, Distrust and Secrets that no one could imagine.

Murdered by his own mother and uncle, a young mafia boss is reborn into a world of savage mountain tribes and ancient magic. As the son of the legendary Berserk Lord, his new life promises the family he never had – until his half-uncle's treachery rips it all away again. Now trapped in the Purgatory Domain, a realm of floating islands and natural wonders and creations and also monstrous creatures, he rises as the Blood Sorcerer among the mysterious Nor'vack clan. With a rare ability to devour mana and a growing mastery of forbidden arts, Jorghan prepares for his return to the mainland. Two lives, two betrayals, one burning purpose: to paint his revenge in the colors of blood and wine.

[DROPPED: currently picking up my motivation and starting a new one] Photography helped Espresso to cope up from an incident in his life, but when the person who inspired him suddenly vanished from the limelight of arts, he unwillingly let go of his camera and focuses on studying and helping in his Uncle’s coffee and beverage shop. Four years later, their paths would cross again and it will be his turn to inspire the girl who’s advices became his therapeutic treatment. But when people who caused his trauma re-enter his life and memories he wanted to seal-off resurfaced, will he be able to face them or will he run away? * She was a painter in her prime. Due to an unforeseen event, everything was taken away from her. The once cheery and playful childe becomes dejected and mournful. Sunny days turned to rainy days. Her world was painted gray. Masking her demeanor with a smile always pasted on her face but deep within her heart she was already breaking. Will she be able to find hope? Will someone give a palette of colours to paint her world and be a masterpiece?

Year 1540 Nicole is a lowly human from the mainland trying to make ends meet as she would often paint for middle and high-class people sometimes even Purebloods which was rare in her case. She receives little money which doesn’t financially support her living. Until one day she received an invitation from the Snow Kingdom to paint the great Lord Jasper Gervassius. She reaches the kingdom and Meets Lord Jasper in the hopes of making a big income she receives more than what she bargains for. ---------------------------------- Teaser: Jasper placed both of his hands on either side of Nicole's head trapping her with his body. He stared down at her looking at his sweet innocent lamb, he couldn't help but smile at her widely. Her doe-like eyes staring back at him only made him want to devour her "Why do you play these games with me darling you know I don't like it. I think you forgot who you're dealing with." He leaned down against her lips slightly flicking his tongue in her mouth making her crave for more."My Quahneah Woman" Nicole gasped in shock as she wondered how he knew her tribe's name. Before she could say another Jasper had cupped her cheek softly placing his lips on hers and kissing her softly as he slowly removed his hands against the wall. He was wrapping his arms around her waist bringing her body closer to his as there was no space between them. As they continued Nicole started to become breathless pulling herself back to breathe, she couldn't help but look up to see Jasper looking at her with a smile that was Duchenne. His purple orbs looked into her seeing the love and adorn affection he was showing her.  "Jasper I have a question to ask you" Jasper hummed waiting for her question" What are we going to do about the tirade ." Jasper's smile suddenly became sinister as he narrowed his eyes "Why don't you leave that to me, darling."

I...didn't ask for this..but God gave me this power , the power to become animals as I ate them and the ability to change my genes and this Weird sound in my mind , I thought this power to be a curse but I didn't realize it was the coolest ability to possess in a normal day to day life where fight don't go , police don't fine for speed and wars are very rare to happen . This world was starting to become boring until I discovered this power and discovered I found a new found peace with living creatures. But that peace of mine will change. soon.... (WARNING: NOT FOR VEGETARIANS OR RELIGIOUS THING WHICH INCLUDE VEGANISM AND VEGETARIANISM. (IM NOT EVIL , THANKS!)

A newly birthed child is akin to a pure white sheet. And if someone had to badmouth about their behavior, it should be towards the parents because after birth it is up to the parents to navigate their children on the road of life. They paint their child with their ideology , thought's , emotion and sometimes dream. So how a child grows up depends on the environment and their parents. ••••••• Quotes: “One must prepare themselves to be embarrassed if they want to embarrass someone.” “One must deceive themselves to deceive others.” “Everyone wears a mask to hide themselves from the world.” •••••• Submitting this for the webnovel spirity awards 2024. Please support me. Thank you. [Warning. Mature content. sensitive content.] [This is fiction so don't take it seriously and just enjoy.]

Jack Turner was a normal seventeen year old boy. he went to school, had a job, and other then the fact that he lived alone in his grandpa's townhouse, he lived an ordinary life, until the day he saw something he wasn't supposed to see, in the end he lost his life. then God brought him back to life. placing "the seal of anointing" on his left hand. now Jack finds himself dragged into the world of the supernatural. he joins the "church" a secret sect of Christianity dedicated to fighting the most fearsome paranormal threats the world has ever seen. little does Jack know that he has a destiny of biblical proportions. arc 1: [still ongoing.]

Qiao Mei transmigrated into a novel as a supporting character with the same name as her who lacked presence. This supporting character was a country bumpkin who couldn’t get married due to her obesity. According to the original script, this country girl Qiao Mei was a fatty spoiled by her grandfather. However, their relatives were all vicious and cruel people. Her grandfather had poor health, so once he died, the relatives would divide and swallow up his assets. Hence, her grandfather’s greatest wish was to marry Qiao Mei off. For this, even sacrificed and betrayed his good friend’s grandson, Xia Zhe. Grandpa got Xia Zhe drunk and had Qiao Mei forcibly take the strong and handsome Xia Zhe with her body which weighed more than two hundred pounds. Then, grandpa would catch them the next day and force Xia Zhe to marry Qiao Mei. However, that eventually caused the start of Qiao Mei’s unfortunate life. Also, in the original story, Qiao Mei took possession of Xia Zhe’s mysterious jade. But due to Qiao Mei’s stupidity, her cousin's sister had tricked Qiao Mei into giving her the jade, which resulted in the cousin’s family becoming rich. When Qiao Mei transmigrated here, it was during the awkward moment when she was making love to the man after making him drunk. She woke up groggily the next day and grandpa’s team had already appeared at the door. Qiao Mei was frightened. She didn’t want to proceed on the original path and marry a man who didn’t love her. And so, she lied and chased grandpa away. She also pushed the man out before forcing herself to look at her tanned and chubby reflection in the mirror! Alas, she cried at her ugly appearance… Like a sumo wrestler in large cloth underwear, even the plus-sized apparel shops didn’t have clothes in her size. And her face was the size of a pizza, a scorched pizza! Qiao Mei decided to reform her life! The first step, lose weight! The second step, clean up her room! She used to be particular about cleanliness, and although her current house had a huge courtyard, she could only describe it as messy! The third step was to hold onto the jade tightly so her greedy cousin wouldn’t stand a chance! Only, wasn’t the tall and handsome Xia Zhe supposed to hate her according to the original story? Why was he being nicer and nicer to her?

Valeria Hart has always believed that art is an extension of the soul. But no matter how much passion she pours into her paintings, it never seems to be enough—not for the galleries that reject her, not for the clients who undervalue her work, and certainly not for the mounting medical bills threatening to take away the only family she has left. Just when she’s on the verge of giving up, an unexpected offer changes everything. Adrian Sinclair—a wealthy, enigmatic businessman—wants her to paint a portrait of his late brother, Oliver. But this isn’t just any commission. Adrian doesn’t want a simple likeness; he wants a piece of art that breathes, that holds the essence of the brother he lost. As Valeria delves into Oliver’s world—through photographs, stories, and the lingering grief Adrian tries so hard to hide—she finds herself caught between the lines of memory and reality, of passion and restraint. But as she begins to uncover the depth of Adrian’s pain, she also starts to see the cracks in her own guarded heart. With every brushstroke, Valeria paints more than just a portrait—she paints the emotions neither of them are ready to face. But when secrets from the past come to light, Valeria realizes that this commission isn’t just about capturing Oliver’s soul—it’s about uncovering the truth that could change both of their lives forever. A story of art, loss, and unexpected connections, Strokes of You is a heartfelt romance about two people learning to heal—one brushstroke at a time.

vic uma mulher injustiçada,maltratada punida pelo marido sem descanso,um dia tudo muda. Entre a vida e a morte,uma linha fina entre o mundo mortal e o mundo superior. Um contrato com um demônio muda toda sua trajetória Horüs uma das criaturas mais belas do seu mundo e uma de poucas da sua espécie, 3mil anos no escuro só ate tudo mudar por um leilão demoníaco. Não sera um romance clichê

Cliche. Another monster progression story. That was probably what you thought when you read the title of my story. And, I can't lie, for the most part, it probably is. But, what else am I supposed to do when I've been thrusted into a world that could kill me in an instant? There's nothing to do but to progress, to devour and evolve. You would do the same too. Such is the basis of a monster. Such is the right of any living being. So that's what I did. I ate, I killed and I hoarded anything I could get my big limbs on. Friendship, allies and love? There used to be a little god calling himself "Heaven's Equal" who spouted of such things, before I ate him. The world went pretty quiet after that. Follow my story. Read for yourself how I evolved from a little monster in a lake I thought was the ocean, all the way into the Titan Of Destruction. What To Expect: - A relatively quick progression story - Ruthless, I mean - Fang Yuag levels - of ruthless protagonist. - A system? that grows stronger along with the protagonist - Big Monsters Duking It Out, with minimal humans/beastmen/elves, etc. . .focus. Basically, monsterverse without annoying ass humans ruining the show. - Did I mention that the protagonist was pretty evil?

They did something unforgiveable. And she had no time to wait for a reincarnation. She knew what to do. For there was already a plan brewing in her mind. Xu Feng wouldn't stop until everyone who humiliated her paid for it. Gu family "You got to marry someone, you can't just be focusing on the company, jiang. A bethroal is just as important as your career life. It's just gonna make you more strong than weak." "Trust me grandpa, my marriage isn't that long away, I have someone on my mind. Don't worry " What they didn't know was that he had absolutely no idea who he loved.

In a windswept solsticea town, a young painter with a mysterious figure in his dreams. With each stroke of his brush, he creates a painting of a beautiful woman lying on rocks near the exact same beach he lives in. The woman is no ordinary woman. However, when the painting is finished, the water on the canvas appears as real as a river, and from within it, the Goddess of the Sea emerges from the painting and is reborn into the mortal world. The painter, however, is no ordinary man—he is a descendant of an ancient bloodline connected to the gods. The goddess, who was once imprisoned within the canvas by the gods of the sky, believes that this man is the key to freeing herself completely and reclaiming all her powers. Will the man give himself up to restore the goddess's powers? Or will he become the final sacrifice in a destiny that has been written for thousands of years?

They shattered Ethan’s world—betrayed him, broke him, left him to rot. But some wounds don’t heal. They fester, turning into something darker. Now, he’s back, not as the man they once knew, but as a force of reckoning. With every step, he hunts them down, his vengeance painted in blood. Their screams don’t move him, their pleas mean nothing. This isn’t justice. This isn’t redemption. This is payback.

At the press conference, reporters bombarded Chen Xing with questions. "Can you explain how someone as young as you clinched the championship? We heard accusations from other contestants that you've been cheating? Is that true?" Chen Xing shoved the microphone that was pushed up to his nose away, his face filled with annoyance, "I want to state again very seriously that I haven't cheated!" As his words ended, Chen Xing waved his hand and summoned a behemoth that blotted out the sky, then jumped onto its back. "Damn it, I can't stand this anymore. Just because I raised them well, they say I cheated? My crocodile accidentally ate a demon, and that's cheating?"