Blue pearl
Lying in the darkness of my bedroom, I stare at the ceiling, dimly lit by a bedside lamp, while all these questions, all these regrets, assail my mind, already clouded by a life that continues to deteriorate.
I'm desperately searching for the meaning of my life, the existential questions come to me and not finding an answer plunges me into a growing anguish.
I'm young and have my whole life ahead of me, I'm told. I know that gold isn't to be found on every street corner, so I continue to live each day as a new trial, a new chore that I carry out, like a robot, programmed for its task, without feeling, without joy.
No great depression, no great war, no great cause to defend, sometimes I regret the peace and the world I live in, for having raised me in what looks like a paradise in disguise.
"Enjoy every moment as if it were my last", but my God, when will that last day come, freeing me from this valley of hell that is life?
When will I see something else, when will I feel a spark that will free me from the tyranny imposed by this deep weariness, this deep fatigue that overwhelms me every day.
Yet my alarm clock goes off, as it does every morning, I sigh lightly, close my eyes for a moment of peace and get up without expecting much today, plunging back into this great circus scene of which I am the clown.
Yet little did I know that my daily life would be turned upside down by this blue ocean, which like two lights through a sea of darkness, warmed something in me that I thought had disappeared.