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Thesaurus Epiphany

Rizzmaster: The Adventures of Bob

SYNOPSIS | Initially an ‘Average Joe’, or thoroughly mediocre person, Bob, born with F- grade genetic potential had an epiphany that day when he read in his science textbook that "The goal of all living things was to reproduce". Stumbling upon Epigenetics, a Theory which states that every organism can alter its genetic potential as a result of their own actions and in the right environmental conditions, Bob begins to study and train in order to improve his Genetic Quality, in order to become a genetic success and attain Immortality. One day he picks up a manual entitled “The Art of Rizz, Vol. 1” dropped by a grandfather who is seeking a disciple to pass on his teachings, and so begins Bob’s Adventures as he embarks on the path of becoming a Grand Rizzmaster, and achieving Immortality with endless achievements, the most important one being to achieve Evolutionary success and to ensure his DNA is passed on successfully. Read and follow along with the Adventures of Bob in this unique ‘Coming’-of-age Tale and get ready for a ‘Wild Ride’. And no! Not… necessarily the one you’re now thinking of now… ! (Get that mind out of the gutter :P!!!) Rating: PG Parental Guidance recommended ___ • Any and all terms and ‘epiphanies’ in this work are intended as satire for comedic effect and should not be taken seriously. • All characters, places and events are fictional unless otherwise stated. • The aim is to Entertain. Enjoy ! ✨ • Read and you won't regret* *Disclaimer: 50% probability.
nightskynear · 116.6K Views

Multiverse Chaos : The Tale of a Bored Goddess

OFFICIAL DIVINE ABSTRACT Subject: Yan Meigui, Great Goddess of Life, Luck, War, Tax Evasion, & 37 Other Domains (Job openings were plentiful last millennium. Pension plan? Cosmic.) STATUS REPORT: Supreme cosmic power? ✓ Omniscient wisdom? ✓ Ability to warp reality on a whim? ✓✓✓ Escaping soul-crushing, eternity-spanning boredom? ...Error 404. Heaven’s predictable. So predictable. Brunch with Buddha? He always orders avocado toast. Armageddon committee meetings? Agenda item 3: Apocalypse rescheduling (raincheck for Ragnarök). Yan’s only escape? Binge-reading mortal fiction. So much drama! So much chaos! So much… unpredictability. Then—A Divine Epiphany™: “Hear me out…” Yan whispered to the void (HR was on lunch break). “What if… I just… GO INTO the stories? Experience the drama firsthand? Maybe… tweak a few plot points? For, uh, narrative enhancement?” OBJECTIONS OVERRULED: “Are those worlds even real?” scoffed the Angel of Pedantic Queries. Yan's secretary. Yan waved a hand. Puff. He became a very confused garden gnome. “Well, OBVIOUSLY they’re real,” she declared, adjusting her war helmet (doubles as a knitting basket). “Where else would all these weird ideas come from? Mortals aren’t that creative.” MISSION PARAMETERS: Descend Immediately. Heavenly predictability = Terminated. Experience ALL THE STORIES. Romance! Intrigue! That one is about competitive cheese rolling! Optional Objective: Introduce "Controlled Narrative Enhancements" (a.k.a. Make Some Chaos™). ARMED WITH: Divine boredom A slightly used "World-Hopping VIP Pass" (expires: never) Zero understanding of mortal consequences (It’s fine! She’s Goddess of Luck, too!) WARNING: Reality stability not guaranteed. Mortal sanity optional. All stories are subject to divine "editorial input." CURRENT LOCATION: Chapter 1, Page 1... somewhere. Probably involving velociraptors. Or sentient badgers. Maybe both. Let the games begin!
Cheesecake_is_life · 1.1K Views
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