Best Your Mom Joke

Seeing this, the young migrant worker laughed even crazier and pushed me towards my mother. I couldn't help leaning forward and fell on my mother's soft body. Fortunately, I supported myself with my elbow in time and didn't press her. "Let's start! I'll let your son fuck you. You won't call the police, right?" After the young migrant worker finished speaking, his eyes revealed a fierce look. He pressed my head with one hand, moved the dagger, and pretended to cut my neck. "Stop!" My mother screamed. In the empty floors, even in the wasteland near the unfinished building, the sound echoed continuously, and it was particularly shrill when listened carefully. The young migrant worker sneered at my mother. But my mother could only bite her silver teeth and glared at him with fire in her eyes. After taking a few deep breaths to adjust herself, she asked coldly: "I agree to your request, but you must abide by the agreement."

He rose in the End of Dharma Era, and he shook the splendid era. The young Ye Fan, carrying the hopes of six billion people, set out from Earth, waged war in the Otherworld, trampled on skeletons, and made the Ten Thousand Clans tremble, finally ascending to the pinnacle of the universe, overlooking the Ten Thousand Realms! "Even if it takes going up to the Ninth Heaven or down to Netherworld, I will definitely defy heaven to snatch your life back for you!" — Ye Fan.

Fleeing to my mom's best friend for help, I never expected Auntie Shan, who watched me grow up since I was little, to harbor such ulterior motives toward me...

A classic video game Isekai, but with a twist. Ren's obsession with multiclassing in Monsters and Mazes has driven his friends away, tired of his constant rule-bending. When the mysterious Maze Master offers him a chance to beta test the latest update, Ren eagerly accepts, only to find himself trapped inside the game world. His love for multiclassing backfires, leaving him with a crippling experience penalty that hinders his progress. Now, without his friends and burdened by his own reckless choices, Ren must use his wits to survive in a realm where every trick he once exploited now works against him. Can he outsmart a world where the game itself fights back?

Amid the bustling City of Keystone lies hidden groups and buried magic to unravel. What comes are changes in the stars that will shine upon myths and legends, but draw bigger shadows to their truths. It's all too much for Daniel Hart, who just wants to paint for others, but he finds his brush influenced by the slippery effects as maternal mysteries cling to him. WARNING: This is very much full of SMUT before it is mystery and magic. Lots of weird slimy shenanigans too!

Synopsis: Takeshi Mori, a aimless 40 year Japanese man having retired early in life with riches now wonders through the empty city streets at midnight as usual wondering what to do with his life, but that is all shattered as while looking up momentarily he sees an unfathomably big eye staring down at him, with one blink to check if he's too sleep deprived he is gone in an instant. And when his eyes open again, a forest greets him as searing pain jolts him wide awake as on the back of his right hand is a branded symbol of a shield. What happened? Where is he? What is the mark on his hand and what are the increasingly loud howls and growls he can hear coming his way? Story takes place in a fantasy world called Ender with high level magic, fantastical races such as Fae, demons, angels, Undead, merfolk, beast man and more. It'll also have some romance but it'll be a slow burn and i mean SLOW burn. Also i would recommend reading the prologue to get the whole picture and not just jumping into chapter 1. And just a reminder but this is not just a story but the life of the character that is Takeshi Mori, so there isn't just random conflict constantly or too unexpected plot points and progression, i want to make it realistic as i can without boring you guys too much but it's my story so i can do whatever the hell i want. Either stay or leave. Person 1: Hey do you know where my dandelion is? Person 2: Um it's just over there. That's Your Dandelion right? Absolute Cinema: Those who know

Not being a hero isn't the issue. The only problem I'm facing right now is surviving in this world!

Ares did not enjoy the company of girls and even held a strong aversion towards the LGBTQ+ community. He had promised his mother never to follow in his father Clever's footsteps, especially when it came to the advice his father Stanley gave him about not using condoms, particularly when she was the one. A childhood friend, May, and a family's pop in—a girl who grew up around boys, or rather, her brothers. When these two reconnected and became best friends, nothing seemed to stand in the way of their blossoming love. However, May remained unaware that she was unknowingly romancing her best friend Ares, whom she affectionately called by his pet name. To her, it felt completely normal, just as it had with her brothers. She inadvertently rejected Stanley's attempts to express his feelings for her, not realizing what those feelings truly meant. May's understanding of Ares's feelings began to take shape during a Christmas holiday celebration at his grandparents’ house. Jovial and warm-hearted, May finally discovered the implications of Stanley’s earlier actions when Princessah, Ares's little sister, handed her some of their late mother's novels to read. Ares never imagined he would let another woman into his life after his mother. He was determined that his career would not come between him and his love for May, unlike his grandfather Richard.

Under the shadow of the Scarlet Crusade, loyalty and faith become the heaviest shackles. Sally Whitemane, a resolute and cold-blooded candidate for sainthood, faces a harrowing choice between loyalty and humanity amidst the turmoil of a power struggle. Forced to carry out brutal tasks, she gradually loses herself in blood and suffering, yet clings to a desperate hope of saving her closest friend. Demitria, revered as the "Scarlet Saint," bears the weight of faith built on lies and an inescapable destiny. With her lover Jemar by her side, she struggles to break free from control but is ultimately pushed into the abyss of despair. Entwined by friendship, betrayal, and pain, the bond they once shared is torn apart by faith and conspiracy. When the cost of loyalty is revealed and the blade of fate descends, their choices will seal each other's fate. Amid blood and fire, can they find redemption, or are they doomed to be consumed by the darkness of power?

Wang Yang never stopped pursuing his dream of becoming a director and making movies that could amaze the world. However, the fate seemed to play a malicious joke on him. He got wrongly accused and expelled from USC. Fortunately, when God closed a door to Wang Yang, he opened a window for him. After a baby stroller hit him on the street, he began to be able to watch the movies from the future in his head! Since then, the year of 1988 was destined to be an extraordinary year. Besides the miracle written by “Titanic”, one of the most legendary directors in the 21st century was rising quietly…

Kyle lived a mundane life for all twenty years on this mundane planet. His life only made interesting by the sexual fantasies running through his head of being dominated by a woman. Yet those were dreams, or they were until he found one billion dollars randomly in his bank account. Things could surely go up from there right? Femdom: Yes Harem: Yes NTR: Yes Incest: Yes Brutal Segs: Yes A/N: Mc is pathetic and stupid cause I am kinda biased ngl. Don't expect him to be some braniac, he is a dumbass who thinks with his pants.

The story of the greatest villain is about to arrive

Ariana who is a good digger get married to different men and after that she gains access to their properties and she makes it hers...but she got stuck in her last marriage with a multi millioniare, Mr Roberts who was the father of her four kids and because of her failure she usually inflict the pain on her daughters,the twins especially Kyla. later she got access to his company funds system and she swindled some money...she gave her husband divorce papers to sign. She thought she was free but unfortunately nemesis caught up on her...the first man she had a son and he was also paralyzed because of her,he avenges his father and other men she duped on their behalf.....read the full story

“What do you think you are doing with my father?” Henry asked in panic. “Giving him a son he would be proud of,” I replied with a slight smile. ••• The famous Musk family were known for their riches and prestige, but mostly because Hozier Musk, who came from nothing, had made a name for himself. Along the line, he realized his sons had become arrogant with his wealth. So he decided to put them to a test. He disappeared from their lives for eight years, but he gave his son a task, and whoever won would own a greater share of his wealth. Now Henry, his second son, married a wife who helped him build his reputation and wealth till he was richer and more successful than his brother, but he ended up divorcing her. But as fate might have it, Emily, his ex-wife, met his father, and she took matters into her own hands. But it doesn’t end there, as things got drastic really quickly. 

I will post the chapters when I want cover photo is not mine

your step mother, Rina. Had been sexually frustrated. Will you help her yourself or have someone else do it?

"Miles," I said again, my voice a bit shaky now. "Why did you bring me here?" He turned to face me, his expression suddenly serious. He stepped closer, and I felt my back press against the cold wall behind me. His face was so close to mine that I could feel his breath on my skin. "I like you," he whispered. My mind went blank. For a few seconds, I just stood there, staring at him, not sure if I had heard him right. Then, out of nowhere, I burst out laughing. It wasn’t that I didn’t take him seriously; I just didn’t know how else to react. Miles was not the type of person to confess his feelings like that. This had to be a joke, right? "Miles, you—" I started, but before I could finish, he grabbed me by the collar and kissed me. It wasn’t a soft, gentle kiss. It was rough, almost desperate. I froze, my mind reeling. This couldn’t be happening. But it was. His lips were on mine, his body pressed against me. For a moment, I was too shocked to do anything, but then I shoved him away with all the strength I had left, my heart racing in my chest. "What the hell, Miles?" I shouted, my voice shaking with a mix of anger and confusion. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, his expression calm, too calm. "I’m sorry," he said quietly. "It was just a joke." "The plot revolves around Miles and leo, two high school boys who were once friends but are now just strangers. But what happens when, one day, Miles kisses leo and tells him that he likes him? But it's just a joke....? What the heck! Leo didn't like this joke at all.

The Risks of Online Crypto Investment: A Cautionary Tale EMAIL: rap iddigitalreco ve ry @ exe cs. com. WHAT SAPP: + 1 41 4 80 7 14 85 Online crypto investment can seem like a promising opportunity, but it’s crucial to recognize that there are no guarantees. My own experience serves as a stark reminder of this reality. I was drawn in by the allure of high returns and the persuasive marketing tactics employed by various brokers on platforms like Instagram. Their polished presentations and testimonials made it seem easy to profit from cryptocurrency trading. Everything appeared to be legitimate. I received enticing messages about the potential for substantial gains, and the brokers seemed knowledgeable and professional. Driven by excitement and the fear of missing out, I invested a significant amount of my savings. The promise of quick profits overshadowed the red flags I should have noticed. I trusted these brokers without conducting proper research, which was a major mistake. As time went on, I realized that the promised returns were nothing but illusions. My attempts to withdraw funds were met with endless excuses and delays. It became painfully clear that I had fallen victim to a scam. The reality hit hard: my hard-earned money was gone, and I was left feeling foolish and defeated. In my desperation, I sought help from a company called Rapid Digital Recovery. They specialize in helping individuals recover funds lost to online scams. Their expertise and guidance have been invaluable during this difficult time. While I remain cautious and skeptical, I’m hopeful that they can assist me in retrieving my funds. This has taught me an important lesson: if something seems too good to be true, it probably is. I urge anyone considering online crypto investments to be extremely cautious. Do your research, scrutinize the brokers, and avoid rushing into decisions driven by hype or pressure. The world of cryptocurrency can be volatile and unregulated, making it a breeding ground for scams. while online investments can be appealing, they come with significant risks. Protect yourself by staying informed and skeptical. Learn from my experience and prioritize due diligence over quick gains. Stay away from unverified platforms and be wary of offers that sound too good to be true. Your financial security is worth the effort to ensure you’re making safe and informed decisions.

Their dedicated and efficient team made the daunting process of recovery much more manageable. If you are a victim of a scam, don’t hesitate to contact them; you may find the relief you desperately seek.

Best Bitcoin Recovery Websites: Safeguarding Your Digital Assets

making you smile is top priority, smile always.

lara was very young when her mother died but when her mother died she gave her a novel and one day the novel came into life

Meet Lila Ignacio, certified bisexual. Ang babaeng katatapos lang mag move on sa kanyang Ex-Girlfriend na ngayon nga ay may asawa na at masayang masaya na sa kanyang binubuong pamilya. Nangako ito na magpapaka straight na at hinding hindi na muling makikipag relasyon sa kapwa nito babae. At pinili na lamang na panindigan ang kanyang naging nobyo ngayon na si Micheal. But suddenly, she will meet this girl again for the second time around. Ang best friend din ng kanyang best friend na si Alice. Ang babae na galing din sa kanyang nakaraan at konektado sa pagkawasak ng kanyang puso. Ang dati nito na kinaiinisan. At kahit kailan ay hindi nito naisip na pagtatagpuin silang muli ng tadhana. When their worlds collide again, bubuksan kaya nitong muli ang kanyang puso para sa bagong pag-ibig? Pero, paano naman ang nobyo nito? Hahayaan niya bang mahulog muli ang kanyang sarili sa taong wala namang kasiguraduhan kung sasaluhin ba siya nito o hindi? Tama ba na hayaan na lamang ni Lila ang kung ano mang naka tadhana para sa kanya?

A funny story about a mom always messing up her son's life.