Best Yo Mama Jokes Dirty

I stood still as I was in front of the cold man before me. I stared with a firm gaze as I looked for words to say. "I admit, Jordan is your son." I said with a firm gaze and his eyes were on me as I spoke. "So you spent the whole fvcking 5 years not even telling me." he snickered and I looked at him with so much fright. "But we both know you are a beast and you don't have a heart, so please, let me just take my son and we will be out of you're life." I said and held little Jordan in my hands. Quickly, I turned to leave but as I was about to walk out, his next words put me in a halt. "You are not going anywhere with my son. I will take care of him weather you like it or not." he insisted with a cold glare, restricting my movement. I knew I was not going to get anywhere with an argument with him. He was death; a beast; always having his ways in things he does and I knew I couldn't fight him. For a moment I thought. Maybe I should leave Jordan with him, then come visit him. That would be quite right and easy for me. I gathered some courage and now spoke, "Fine then, I'll just come and visit him. So please, take good care of him." I muttered, and the fact that guilt is eating me for all of those years I spent not telling him made me say those exact words. "Visit? Who said you will just be visiting him? You will come and live with him." he said with a husky voice and fear gripped me. "No never, I will never go back there again." I sneered and quickly turned to hurry off, but he grabbed my hands, pulling me back and trapping me against the wall. I could feel the heat of his body so close to mine, and his domineering gaze lowering on me making my heart race while I stared right into his eyes he boldly locked on mine. "It's either you come or die then, Mia." he said and smirked. For a moment, I forgot to breath. •••••••• It has always been hard for Mia Hills as she was working for her grandmother. She was an orphan and lived with her sick grandmother, trying so hard to pay for her grandmother's medical bills. Out of desperation she went to DEATH a deadly man who was ruthless and cold. She did one thing she didn't want to do; she sold her virginity to the beast in exchange for money. After her one stand with death she promised herself that she'd never get linked to death again but when she found out that she is pregnant, her world turned out to be crumbling. Not just any child but DEATH'S CHILD.

In the heart of Seoul, high schooler Joon-ho Kang conceals a secret—he's a master assassin in the virtual world of NexaRealm. Selected to represent his school in the national 1v1 tournament, Joon-ho's strategic brilliance wins not only matches but also recognition. However, success raises a profound question: Does he love NexaRealm for the game or the pursuit of being the best? His internal struggle intensifies as he navigates newfound fame, supported quietly by his parents and observed closely by childhood friend Soo-jin. NexaRealm, once a source of joy, becomes a crossroads when Joon-ho receives an invitation to join Korea's national team. Now, Joon-ho faces a choice: pursue professional gaming, reach the pinnacle in NexaRealm, or maintain a balance between passion and genuine connections. The journey unfolds as he confronts the cutthroat world of pro gaming, discovering the true meaning of his NexaRealm connection and the choices that define his path. Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, events and incidents are the product of the author's imagination and his only. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. Heavy language is used in the story. Blood, gore, violence and sexual acts are also depicted in the story. Update: a chapters a day Site: https://akikure.carrd.co/

Windi Featherwing and Sowema embark on a journey together to search for the missing druid Oyi Nightsong and the Purification Box he carried. They encounter various challenges along the way, including attacks by ogres, the appearance of a mysterious orc, and the revelation that Oyi has turned into a monster. Ultimately, they team up with the orc to defeat the corrupted Oyi and deal with his remains. Before parting ways, Windi and Sowema discuss their futures, each harboring concerns as they set off on different paths.

"Please baby" He pleads trying to pull her into his arms but she glares at him. "Don't touch me" With a harsh glare she turns to face the other side. "That is the thing about you rich brats, you think everything can be gotten with daddy and momny's money well congrats we are married but don't even think for a second that I'll love you" "let me go" She pleads trying to escape his arms. "That will mean letting go of my breath baby and you know it's impossible" Attending the Academy meant for the elites has always been a dream of many and so when she receives the admission to go study in a school way above her league she agrees. She meets four crazy girls along with her cousin and she starts understanding life. Catching the eyes of a mysterious wealthy man who volunteers to be her benefactor but with a deal in place. The other girl who is from a middle class family catches the eyes of the most popular boy in the school who is also the most desired. The scandalous life of the rich daughter who is in a secret tryst. The wanna be popular girl whose closets are filled with skeleton. The rich brat who wants to enjoy life And a greedy human They all collide and go through life together. "I want you to marry my son, living is impossible without you by his side" She stares wide eyed at the woman in front of her, a very important figure pleading for her to marry her brat of a son. "You cannot escape destiny darling and yours is tied with mine" He says the arrogance dripping off his voice. "I am sure you remember all those nights by my side sweetheart"

Stefania Hayden es una mujer de 25 años con una vida aparentemente tranquila y feliz, pero con muchos secretos que provienen de un pasado tormentoso. Un pasado que volverá a su vida, gracias a su proyecto más codiciado pero que luego llegara con más fuerza, cuando ella comience a recordar cosas que había olvidado por culpa del accidente que sufrió hace diez años atrás. Recuerdos que la llevaran a investigar para descubrir verdades que le fueron negadas desde su infancia y que la llevaran hacer justicia, una justicia que no tuvo ni ella ni su madre en su momento y que gracias a la posición que tiene ahora podrá intentar conseguirlo. Pero su camino no será nada fácil, porque tendrá que enfrentar sus más profundos miedos y enfrentar a las personas que más le hicieron daño, en especial su verdadera familia. Dándose cuenta de que nadie es lo que parece, pero aún así, estará dispuesta hacer lo que sea necesario para que los culpables caigan sin imaginarse tampoco que el amor de su vida que conoció desde pequeña volverá a hacerse presenta y que al igual que ella, él sentía lo mismo o lo siente aún después de creerla muerta por diez años...

Anna's world was crumbling. Her mother's life was fading away, and the medical bills were choking her. In desperation, she made a decision that would cost her a lifetime: a decision to become a baby mama for the wealthy and jerky Adams Winthrop. Adams, the sole heir of the Winthrop Fashion Empire, needed an heir to secure his inheritance. But with his playboy lifestyle and lack of interest in commitment, finding a willing partner seemed impossible. That was until he laid eyes on Anna at the clubhouse. She was in dire need of cash, and he needed a baby. It was a match made of convenience, not love, or so they thought. As the months went by, Anna found herself falling head over heels for the charming and captivating Adams. But could she truly fall for a man who only wanted her for her womb?

Kai Hunter is H University’s biggest player and heartbreaker. Known for his good looks and for being one of the brightest students on campus, he is one of the most eligible bachelors that everyone wants to ‘tame’. However, everything changes when freshman Night Winters becomes his new dorm mate. Kai is instantly attracted to the hot, young freshman who he had caught having a one-night stand at a bar and hasn’t been able to get out of his mind ever since. Night is openly gay, but Kai has been into girls his whole life…or so he thought. Can he let go of his pride and accept Night for who he is? Or will Night forever be forced to be just his dirty little secret, under the sheets, inside the closed doors to their dorm? However, Night is hiding secrets that can break the fragile foundation of their relationship at any time, and if Kai waits any longer…he just might end up losing the only person precious to him.

A classic video game Isekai, but with a twist. Ren's obsession with multiclassing in Monsters and Mazes has driven his friends away, tired of his constant rule-bending. When the mysterious Maze Master offers him a chance to beta test the latest update, Ren eagerly accepts, only to find himself trapped inside the game world. His love for multiclassing backfires, leaving him with a crippling experience penalty that hinders his progress. Now, without his friends and burdened by his own reckless choices, Ren must use his wits to survive in a realm where every trick he once exploited now works against him. Can he outsmart a world where the game itself fights back?

The story of a woman whose name is "Nadia" whose father is "Mr. Brown", he loves the gamblings so much until he has a lot of debts. She cannot solve this problem, then, she request her closed senior "Hector" to solve it. He can solve it, but she may found the worse story when her father dare to borrow father of Hector...

Not being a hero isn't the issue. The only problem I'm facing right now is surviving in this world!

Ares did not enjoy the company of girls and even held a strong aversion towards the LGBTQ+ community. He had promised his mother never to follow in his father Clever's footsteps, especially when it came to the advice his father Stanley gave him about not using condoms, particularly when she was the one. A childhood friend, May, and a family's pop in—a girl who grew up around boys, or rather, her brothers. When these two reconnected and became best friends, nothing seemed to stand in the way of their blossoming love. However, May remained unaware that she was unknowingly romancing her best friend Ares, whom she affectionately called by his pet name. To her, it felt completely normal, just as it had with her brothers. She inadvertently rejected Stanley's attempts to express his feelings for her, not realizing what those feelings truly meant. May's understanding of Ares's feelings began to take shape during a Christmas holiday celebration at his grandparents’ house. Jovial and warm-hearted, May finally discovered the implications of Stanley’s earlier actions when Princessah, Ares's little sister, handed her some of their late mother's novels to read. Ares never imagined he would let another woman into his life after his mother. He was determined that his career would not come between him and his love for May, unlike his grandfather Richard.

Under the shadow of the Scarlet Crusade, loyalty and faith become the heaviest shackles. Sally Whitemane, a resolute and cold-blooded candidate for sainthood, faces a harrowing choice between loyalty and humanity amidst the turmoil of a power struggle. Forced to carry out brutal tasks, she gradually loses herself in blood and suffering, yet clings to a desperate hope of saving her closest friend. Demitria, revered as the "Scarlet Saint," bears the weight of faith built on lies and an inescapable destiny. With her lover Jemar by her side, she struggles to break free from control but is ultimately pushed into the abyss of despair. Entwined by friendship, betrayal, and pain, the bond they once shared is torn apart by faith and conspiracy. When the cost of loyalty is revealed and the blade of fate descends, their choices will seal each other's fate. Amid blood and fire, can they find redemption, or are they doomed to be consumed by the darkness of power?

Wang Yang never stopped pursuing his dream of becoming a director and making movies that could amaze the world. However, the fate seemed to play a malicious joke on him. He got wrongly accused and expelled from USC. Fortunately, when God closed a door to Wang Yang, he opened a window for him. After a baby stroller hit him on the street, he began to be able to watch the movies from the future in his head! Since then, the year of 1988 was destined to be an extraordinary year. Besides the miracle written by “Titanic”, one of the most legendary directors in the 21st century was rising quietly…

"Kamu pikir dengan menyembuhkanku akan membuatku lebih mencintaimu?" Dia mencemooh sambil menarik rambutku keras-keras saat ia menyeretku menuju pintu. "Kamu menyakitiku, Xavier," aku menangis memukul-mukulnya dengan lemah. Tak banyak yang bisa kulakukan. "Jika aku melihatmu sedekat satu inci dari diriku lagi," dia melemparku ke dinding "aku akan melupakan konsekuensinya dan membunuhmu,". *** Pasangan dan aku memang ditakdirkan untuk saling membenci, hanya tindakan cinta sejati atau pengorbanan dari pasangan yang lebih kuat yang bisa membetulkan takdir kami, tapi selama tujuh tahun, aku harus menahan siksaan dan cinta semu pasanganku hingga suatu hari aku memutuskan untuk pergi. Aku pergi, bertekad untuk terus tersembunyi darinya selamanya... tetapi beberapa minggu kemudian, aku mengetahui bahwa aku hamil.

"Você achou que me curar faria com que eu te amasse mais?" Ele zombou, agarrando meu cabelo enquanto me arrastava em direção à porta. "Você está me machucando, Xavier," eu chorei, batendo nele fracamente. Não havia muito que eu pudesse fazer. "Se eu te ver a uma polegada de distância de mim," Ele me jogou contra a parede "Eu desafio as consequências e te mato,". *** Minha companheira e eu estávamos destinados a nos odiar, apenas um ato de amor verdadeiro ou altruísmo do companheiro mais forte poderia colocar nossos destinos no caminho certo, mas durante sete anos, eu tive que suportar o abuso do meu companheiro e seu suposto amor da vida dele até que um dia decidi partir. Parti, determinada a ficar escondida dele para sempre... mas descobri que estava grávida algumas semanas depois.

"Dachtest du, wenn du mich heilst, würde ich dich mehr lieben?" Spöttisch packte er mich an den Haaren, während er mich zur Tür zog. "Du tust mir weh, Xavier", weinte ich und schlug schwach gegen ihn. Es gab nicht viel, was ich tun konnte. "Wenn ich dich jemals auch nur einen Zentimeter in meiner Nähe sehe", warf er mich gegen die Wand, "werde ich die Konsequenzen verdammen und dich töten. *** Mein Gefährte und ich waren dazu bestimmt, einander zu hassen, nur ein Akt wahrer Liebe oder Selbstlosigkeit des stärkeren Gefährten konnte unsere Schicksale auf den richtigen Weg bringen, aber sieben Jahre lang musste ich die Misshandlungen meines Gefährten und seine vermeintliche Liebe seines Lebens ertragen, bis ich eines Tages beschloss zu gehen. Ich ging, entschlossen, mich für immer vor ihm zu verstecken... aber ein paar Wochen später fand ich heraus, dass ich schwanger war.

Kyle lived a mundane life for all twenty years on this mundane planet. His life only made interesting by the sexual fantasies running through his head of being dominated by a woman. Yet those were dreams, or they were until he found one billion dollars randomly in his bank account. Things could surely go up from there right? Femdom: Yes Harem: Yes NTR: Yes Incest: Yes Brutal Segs: Yes A/N: Mc is pathetic and stupid cause I am kinda biased ngl. Don't expect him to be some braniac, he is a dumbass who thinks with his pants.

"Did you think healing me would make me love you more?" He scoffed grabbing my hair as he pulled me towards the door. "You're hurting me, Xavier," I cried beating against him weakly. There was not much I could do. "If I ever see you an inch close to me," He threw me against the wall "I'll damn the consequences and kill you,". *** My mate and I were destined to hate each other, only an act of true love or selflessness from the stronger mate could set our destines on the right path but for seven years, I had to put up with my mate's abuse and his supposed love of his life until one day I decided to leave. I left, determined to stay hidden from him forever... but I found out I was pregnant few weeks later.

"Why can't you come back? My heart beats only for you. Your sight alone quenches my thirst and hunger. Come back to me and I'll accommodate both you and your daughter," he broke into a weak sob "Come back to me, lest I die," he breathed heavily, holding his chest as he voiced the words "Oh, Edward!" Her rehearsed self-control slipped from its firm stand "I want nothing more but to stand in your arms forever," she sighed, "But I'm no more the girl you used to love, I'm a Prostitute." Orphaned Roxanne, manages to land a job as a cleaner in a very prestigious company after four years of waiting helplessly. But this job comes with many tasking responsibilities that keep her forever on her toes. One of them being the fact that she has to keep herself from drowning in the grumpy CEO's lusty bed However, withholding herself from falling into lusty temptation isn't the only struggle she has to face, as she is doomed to find out that the secret of her birth family has been lying beneath her nose, that her moral self-control against lust has slipped out of place and given way to a seed that has zero chance of knowing a father and that there is a concentratedly dangerous killer who would not rest until she has been reduced to ashes.

Hace 500 millones de años. Periodo Cámbrico. Dios descendió sobre la tierra bárbara más antigua y los mares primitivos. Él es el principio de todo, creó la sabiduría y la vida, es el Creador de todos los seres vivientes. Con el paso del tiempo, las historias se convierten en Epopeyas, las Epopeyas en Mitos y finalmente los Mitos quedan enterrados con los años. Pero... Sólo Dios es Eterno. *** Descargo de responsabilidad: todos los personajes, escenarios, etc. públicamente reconocibles son propiedad de sus respectivos dueños. No se pretende infringir los derechos de autor. Está no es mi obra, sino una traducción de la obra china: 我就是神

The story of the greatest villain is about to arrive

Imagine graduating college in a few months, and then the apocalypse happened. What’s more, dungeons and monsters appeared, superhuman powers awakened and the world changed, yet Jade remained as he was—the ever so heedless, unbothered, emotionless, and weird guy manning the cash register. But some people deemed him lucky because he seemed to be unaffected by all those happenings. But would they still believe that when Jade came home one day from his night shift, tired and hungry, to find a dungeon gate right inside his house? The worst thing that could ever happen to him was get sucked in that gate, however, instead of the gate, strange Seekers are sucking up to him instead. Jade: Why is this happening?! Seeker 1: Help me go back to my world and I can give you everything you wish for. Seeker 2: I don’t care about going back to that damned world, so can you just let me stay here with you? Seeker 3: Jade, honey, you’re the best Minder! I need you, so come with me to my world. And so on… these Seekers are all lunatics forcing him to help them go back to their respective worlds! But how can Jade do that, when all of them were just mere characters from books?! Now, what will Jade do?

"Ayoko Mama! Dito lang ako. 'Tsaka Ma, sino 'yang bestfriend mong 'yan? Baka patayin din ako tulad ng ginawa mo sa akin kanina Mama," mariing tutol ko sa gusto ni Mama. "No, Dos. That's final. Nakausap ko na siya kanina at nagkasundo na kami. Ihahatid ka bukas ni Aya doon. Huwag kang mag-alala, mabait 'yon basta matino ka," sabay ngisi sa akin ni Mama. Ano kayang naghihintay kay Dos sa mansion kasama ang babaeng magpapatino sa kanya?

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