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Porn Noodle

Love's Wild Card

The Heiress Sisters "Big" Miss and "Little" Miss, please stop tormenting me! I'm begging you!" One heroic moment at a Manhattan restaurant introduces Alex Stone to a stunning beauty who turns out to be Emma Carter—the daughter of his company's Shanghai CEO. In other words, the "Big Miss" herself. But beneath her elegant exterior and graceful demeanor, this heiress has a side that nobody sees coming. It's enough to drive a man crazy! Be your housekeeper? Big Miss, are you joking? You can barely make instant noodles, and you want to be my housekeeper? The CEO has two daughters? Wait—so that beauty I antagonized on the subway is the "Little Miss"? What? You're moving in too? No! Please, have mercy! One sister is more than enough to handle, and now there's another? They really are something else, these "Big" and "Little" Misses! The "Big" Miss may look elegant and gentle, but she's hopelessly scatter-brained. The "Little" Miss might appear cold and stunning, but she's got the temper of a spitfire. To make matters worse, these sisters have been like oil and water since childhood—and now they're both living under my roof. Talk about a full house! I set out to chase beautiful women, but these "Big" and "Little" Misses ended up chasing me instead! How is a man supposed to survive this? These beautiful heiresses are anything but docile. How's a simple white-collar worker supposed to handle their antics? They say a man who isn't a little roguish isn't developing normally. Well, I'm all man—shouldn't I enjoy this situation? Who am I? Just a guy who spends three days a week creating legends, two days falling in love, one day being eccentric, and the remaining day searching for the edge of the world and the kingdom of ice. But love... love isn't simple. The only things that can grip you for life are your teeth and love!
LuminousLetterS · 1.8K Views

The Great Spaghetti Incident [GSTRDB]

A Note from Barnaby Twiddlepot Dear Reader, Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Barnaby Twiddlepot—inventor, dreamer, and, some might say, the architect of one of the most infamous culinary catastrophes in history: The Great Spaghetti Incident. It is a tale as tangled and twisted as the spaghetti it spawned, and I feel both duty-bound and curiously delighted to tell you my side of the story. This book is not merely an account of the absurd events that unfolded in Flipsville that fateful summer. No, it is a testament to ambition gone awry, to the sheer unpredictability of invention, and to the fragile boundary between genius and madness. What began as an innocent attempt to revolutionize dinner parties ended with an entire town engulfed in a wave of pasta-shaped pandemonium. Through these pages, you will witness my humble beginnings, the birth of the Spaghettifier, and the escalating chaos that turned my quaint little backyard laboratory into ground zero for an unprecedented incident. You will laugh, you will cringe, and perhaps you will even find yourself questioning your next plate of spaghetti. This is not merely my story. It is the story of a town, a machine, and a series of events that would forever etch the name Flipsville into the annals of culinary history. I have done my best to recount the events faithfully, but let me assure you, the truth is stranger than any fiction I could ever concoct. So, prepare yourself, dear reader, for a journey into the absurd. As you turn these pages, remember: no noodle is ever just a noodle, and sometimes, the simplest ideas can spiral completely out of control. Bon appétit... and good luck. Yours in tangled ambition, Barnaby Twiddlepot Inventor, accidental calamity maker, and reluctant chronicler of the Great Spaghetti Incident.
Screen_Gaming · 747 Views

Age Of Elves

When monsters from another dimension overrun Earth, humanity strikes a desperate deal with a mysterious alien force. In exchange for salvation, Earth’s youth are transported to alien worlds to train as warriors—but the true cost of this pact remains unknown. Chase, Kellie, Arthur, Belinda and Selena, five teenagers shaped by the chaos, embark on a perilous journey to grow stronger, conquer monsters, and unlock the power of their unique bloodlines. As Chase rises, his charisma and strength attract powerful allies—and lovers—from across worlds, forming a harem of beautiful and voluptuous women from different races. Faced with relentless dangers and a looming cosmic threat, they must uncover the truth behind humanity’s deal and fight to secure a future for all. Will their bonds and newfound strength be enough to overcome the darkness ahead? MC is not a mindless idiot controlled by his dick so don't expect him to have sex with all the women he meets. Although there will be sex scenes, this novel is not a porn novel, I intend to focus on the storyline. NOTICE!!! Thank you for your support and feedback! After careful consideration, I’ve revised the story starting from Chapter 25 due to errors and inconsistencies. To align better with the new direction, please skip directly to Chapter 72. Your patience and understanding mean everything—thank you for being part of this journey! Check out my other novel - Lord Of Harem Remember After Reading Chapter 25 Skip to 72
Nova07 · 135.3K Views

Harem System : Reincarnated with a Divine Cashback

*Ping!!!* -[Congratulations, you have won the H.E.A.D.I.E.S award for best porn actor, three years in a row!!!] Alex Turner, a struggling accountant, suddenly finds himself in the body of Jason Rivers, Hollywood's golden boy known for his pulverizing roles in the porn industry, after they both suffer near-fatal accidents. Thrilled and overwhelmed by his newfound fame and fortune, Alex discovers he's been granted an additional supernatural gift: [System Activated: Divine Cashback Initialized] [Current Balance: $0] [Spend Money to Make Money!] Now in possession of Jason's connections, influence, and smoking hot body, Alex dives headfirst into the world of celebrity, determined to climb even higher up the social ladder. He quickly learns to leverage the divine rebate system, turning every dollar spent into a multiplied return and reveling in the power it brings. [New Purchase: $1,000 Designer Suit] [Cashback Earned: $5,000] [Level Up! Charm +10] As Alex welcomes the glitz and glamour of Hollywood in Jason's body, he embraces the temptations that come with his newfound wealth and status. With the system as his secret weapon, Alex sets out to become an even bigger star than Jason ever was, enjoying every perk and pleasure that comes his way. And the perks couldn't get bigger than the secret he discovered. "What? A secret cult that runs all of Hollywood?!!!" From luxurious red carpet events to tantalizing escapades with seductive models. As the stakes get higher and the women come in all shapes, colour and sizes, Alex must do two things, survive and spend to earn!! ***** Additional tags: #Exhibitionism #Voyeurism #Harem #Supernatural #AdultContent #Romance ...
SinfulMessiah · 53.5K Views

I sell instant noodles in the wasteland [Through the Book]

狼狼崽子 - Author 我在废土卖泡面[穿书] - Name Status in COO:- 122 [END] Chu Ling is obsessed with a novel "My Wife is Dumb in the Doomsday" and is deeply attracted to the heroine's wife Gu Xiyan. Although this woman is a mute, she has become the ruler of the doomsday step by step with her eyes that can see through people's hearts. But the heroine actually used her to climb up. Chu Ling was about to comment on the author, but a car accident caused him to travel into the novel and he became a cannon fodder with only a few lines of records. What's worse is that the system binding error changed the original doomsday survival system to the fat house happy system. "Do you want this braised beef noodles or this old sauerkraut noodles?" Chu Ling was trying hard to sell instant noodles to survive in the doomsday, but he didn't expect to meet Gu Xiyan. Thinking that the heroine's future behavior would hurt her, Chu Ling was determined to help Gu Xiyan escape from the clutches of the heroine! "Gu Xiyan fell in love with the heroine because she saved her life! If I go and save Gu Xiyan, won't she not fall in love with the heroine? I'm such a little genius!" Chu Ling stared at Gu Xiyan from a distance, thinking, Gu Xiyan is so pretty, she is indeed the person I like. Huh? Why is she blushing? Gu Xiyan has been a mute since she was a child. She thought she would be a mute all her life, but she didn't expect to suddenly awaken the ability to read minds. Listening to those sanctimonious people saying vulgar words in their hearts, it turns out that the end of the world not only destroyed the world, but also the human heart. But the noisy voice kept coming. Gu Xiyan noticed that the source of the voice was a mercenary who had been staring at her. She didn't seem to have any expression on her face. Gu Xiyan originally thought that she only had money in her eyes like everyone else, but the voice in her heart was deafening. "She is so pretty! I like her so much! I wonder if she eats instant noodles?" The confession made Gu Xiyan's heart numb. The doomsday settings are all private, and there will be superpower elements. The writing skills are limited, and I am not very good at writing emotional lines. Content tags: strong and strong, special affection , supernatural power , end of the world, book-traveling, wasteland main characterPerspectiveChu LinginteractiveGu Xiyan One sentence introduction: If you love her, you should treat her to instant noodles. Concept: Persevere and never give up
astraaalll · 454 Views

How to Become an Immortal Farmer: A Former Young Master's POV

I just wanted to slurp my instant noodles and enjoy another trashy series, that’s all I was looking forward to. But instead, I got kidnapped. Then, I died. That's what I remember, at least. But hey, I didn't stay dead. Somehow, I got reincarnated into the body of a young master of the Rainbow Sect. The problem? He was your typical arrogant, spoiled young master. A guy with a ridiculously inflated ego who loved flaunting his power and wealth. So, yeah, not exactly a great deal for me. Instead of waiting for my inevitable doom, I decided to take matters into my own hands. I wasn't about to play the part of some arrogant, entitled brat. I wasn't going to fight other geniuses, and I sure as hell wasn't going to waste my time trying to reach the top in some ridiculous power struggle. Nope. I was done with that nonsense. So, I fled. I ran as far away as I could and found myself a nice, quiet life... cultivating herbs in the peace and solitude of my own little garden. Who needs to challenge the heavens when you can grow your own food in peace? Farming was where the real satisfaction was for me. Fighting, scheming, and trying to outsmart everyone? Not my thing. But growing the perfect batch of herbs? Now that was a true art. ---------------------- This is a slice-of-life series, where a lazy dude just wants to stay out of the power struggle. I ain't no pro or anything, and honestly, this is the first time I’ve written a novel. I'm also a potato, and not a gun owner, so English ain't my mother tongue. But don't worry, I went to school, and it wasn’t an art one.
Eismann12 · 506 Views

Snake's Survival Guide: From Noodle to Nightmare

Meet Sam—a socially awkward, noodle-obsessed NEET who never expected his greatest achievement to be... getting flattened by two trucks at once. But hey, if you're going to die, might as well go out in style, right? Instead of moving on to the afterlife, Sam finds himself reincarnated in a magical world. The catch? He’s not a hero, not a wizard, and certainly not some mighty warrior. Nope, he's a snake. A tiny, scaly, noodle of a snake with zero chill, a sarcastic attitude, and a hunger for survival. Armed with a status window, some basic skills, and an unnatural obsession with eating other monsters to gain their powers, Sam’s got one goal: to become the ultimate predator. Along the way, he’ll unlock new abilities, devour anything that crosses his path (seriously, no one's safe), and evolve into increasingly deadly—and ridiculous—forms. But it’s not all fun and slithers. Between dodging overzealous adventurers, evading ridiculously powerful monsters, and navigating ancient ruins with world-altering secrets, Sam’s got his hands—er, fangs—full. It’s survival of the sneakiest as Sam tries to climb his way up the food chain, one bite at a time. Can this former NEET-turned-snake survive the wilds, outsmart his enemies, and become the nightmare every adventurer fears? Find out in "Snake’s Survival Guide: From Noodle to Nightmare"—a tale of deadly evolution, sarcastic humor, and one very persistent predator!
Fourleaf_Clover_ · 61.6K Views

Chasing the light in the darkness

Lin Kecong is a quiet and depressed person. Since the age of 5, his father, Lin Daqiang have lost his business and become a gambler and a drunkard. He become violence and start beating up Kecong. On Kecong 6 years old birthday, Kecong and his mum Li Xuefen was celebrating his birthday. At 10pm, a drunk Daqiang pulled Kecong out of his room and locked him inside the dark store room of their farm. Xuefen kept knocking on the door to ask him to stop beating their son. But Daqiang tied up Kecong and kept using his belt to whip him hardly. After whipping he spray water on him and leave him inside the darkroom with all the rats and cockroaches. The next morning, his mother quickly sent him to the nearest hospital. Xuefen worried of his health, she bring Kecong and leave the farm and leave her hubby. Xuefen went to Shanghai city to work as a bar hostess to bring up Kecong. Kecong did not know what she work as. 13 years old, Kecong successfully got into Shanghai High school. Everyone in the school despair him as his school uniform is also dirty and torn. 13 years old Kecong have been working in MacDonalds after school hours to help his mother to pay the house rental. 14 years old that year, Daqiang found him and beat him up badly. The next day he fainted in the art classroom due to fever cos of his leg and back injuries. His teacher, Chen Ming and his senior, Wang Jia Hao sent him to the hospital. His mother known of his injuries and found out that the injuries were caused by Daqiang, she took a knife and look for him. Kecong rushed over to look for his mother but instead he saw his mother got killed by his father. Daqiang got caught and went into prison for 10 years. Due to the incident, Kecong went into depression and start talking to himself. In the school he cried everyday. Jia Hao and Chen Ming kept looking after him. A month later after hearing his father went to jail, he took a knife in the arts classroom and cut his wrist. Out of sympathy, Jia Hao started looking after him and even brought him to his condominium to stay with him. After six months being together, the both of them fell in love with each other. Jia Hao applied for Shanghai university but his parents insisted that he go to Harvard University to study medicine. Later his mother felt strange and followed him back to the condominium and saw the both of them kissing in the room without clothes on. Out of anger, she informed his father. His father asked his men to abduct Kecong to his warehouse. They tied him and kept beating him. Jia Hao mother, Wang pei pei slapped him and said him disgusting. Kecong did not dare to answer a word. Chen Ming informed Jia Hao that Kecong was abducted by his parents. He went up to his father’s office and begged him to release Kecong. Pei pei said as long as he willing to go to Harvard they will take as this matter never happened before. Left with no choice, he accepted their request and asked them to give Kecong some money to see doctor and give him a place to stay. They agreed and release him. Without leaving a word to Kecong, Jia Hao left Shanghai to Harvard university to study. Kecong nearly lost his right leg and he went into depression again. He accepted Jia hao’s parents money as a loan and rejected their condo to stay. In the hospital he committed suicide twice. After recovery, Chen Ming took him in to stay in his house but he rejected. After finishing his secondary school, Kecong started to work. He work few jobs a day; a courier in the day, by night he went to a gay pub to work as a waiter. He rent a small old attic room to stay. He eat a box of rice or noodles for a week and biscuits for a week. 3 years later, while sending courier service to an advertising company, the manager spot his looks and offered him to act in an advertisement. The advertisement made him famous overnight. By 22, he managed to return back the money to pei pei and pay off his dad loans.
Michelle_Chan0220 · 20.8K Views

The Demon Lord and his Hero (BL)

When Demon Lord, Syryn Nigh'hart, found that he had gone back in time and turned into his child self, he had assumed to do better with his second life - commit smaller crimes, keep away from burning villages and inciting other demons, contribute to society, abide by most laws, you know? But then the hero, his old friend, had to fall in love with him and ruin his plans. "Goddess, I cannot take responsibility for your champion, Rowan Windwalker, getting bent. Please don't strike me down!" _______ #This story can get sus af (adults in kids' bodies forgetting their age or more like author forgetting it T^T) and is set in a fantasy world with different morals so please suspend your modern sensibilities and bear with the bull$hit. I can't with more comments throwing shade. I already know and I regret it so staph. #Characters are damaged and carry psychological baggage.Their relationships won't all be happy and lovey dovey till they've healed mentally # After like 150 chapters - Angst and Emotional damage.Your mental health may decline as the characters' mental health decline #Trigger warning for mentions of child abuse #World building #Demon Lord (shou/uke) is a shameless FLIRT#The Hero(gong/seme) is an extremely patient man for putting up with the demon lord's nonsense #Gay and sassy #Reformed and immature demon lord (but he's nice now okay. He isn't a psycho.) # MULTIPLE POTENTIAL LOVE INTERESTS I'm begging you please dont fall for the other guy cause some readers do be crying. Second male lead syndrome is real. #Slow burn Romance #Patience is needed#The cat is NOT the ML pls don't ask about the cat ಥ‿ಥ some of you are getting the wrong idea.#If You're commenting under the chapters, avoid using these words (harem, BL, porn, sex, lmao, sh*t, b*tch) that webnovel is blocking even though my book is rated 17+ ______________________________________________ Disclaimer: Cover art belongs to the original artists. If you're the artist, please let me know so I can credit/take down the image.
winterblossom · 2.2M Views
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