Rizz Jokes

A guy has his choice of any female he wants, but there is only one he wants. Going to be a novel exclusive to webnovel. Your feedback is greatly appreciated! What would you like to see more of from this webnovel ? Deeper female interactions, lewd jokes, or awkward, cringey moments? Or maybe more random references to other media? Let me know! TY!!

Suddenly transported to ancient times, struggling to even get enough to eat? What’s this? Men are dwindling due to war, and the government assigns me a beautiful wife with orders to have a child by next year? And now, foreign invaders are threatening the heartland? No problem! Mastering math, physics, and chemistry means I can thrive anywhere! The unstoppable cavalry of the steppes? The indestructible warships of the pirates? A joke! With knowledge as my weapon, I’ll turn the tide and reshape history!

From the depths of a deep and blissful slumber, Chu Yu awoke to the vague sense of someone beside her. Among four of five men that she saw sleeping around her when she awoke, one in particular, caught her eye. 'Who is he?' With his unrivaled elegance and the air of supremacy around him, he gazed upon the princess and asked, "What's wrong, Princess? Did you have a nightmare?" And with that, an uncontrollable chill rose up her spine that made her shiver despite the warmth of the room. Is it a joke? Or is it destiny?

I once believed I was the heroine of a modern fairytale, blessed with beauty, wealth, intelligence, and a powerful legacy. Men adored me, women envied me, and I was engaged to the most desirable man, Cole Fay. My life seemed perfect, a dream where I held the starring role. But on my eighteenth birthday, that illusion crumbled. The truth hit me hard: I wasn't the protagonist, nor even the villain or a side character. I was just cannon fodder, a disposable part of someone else's story. But when fate recognized the cruel joke of my life, I was granted a second chance. This time, I'll write my own story, living for myself. And this time . . . I will never love you again.

Pure instinct to aid the weak. A noble impulse, right? My 'sin,' or perhaps my supreme stupidity, was trying to save a woman and her daughter from a brutal death. In the heat of the skirmish, a moment of carelessness cost me a gunshot. And then, the ironic confirmation of an old suspicion: the God of this world finds amusement in fallen heroes. Just as the darkness was claiming me, a strange phenomenon tore me from its jaws... only to throw me into the body of a noble baby, a child born with privileges, yes, but also with a curse. Lucien Whiteheart, his parents' fifth attempt at having an heir, was a doomed body. A grotesque curse denied them descendants, and now, I, a trapped soul, faced a premature death at the hands of enemies I never provoked. A blessing or a cruel joke of fate? I’ll find out, if I survive.

A kidnapping shattered Sophia Diaz's innocence; the wealthy heiress who once dreamed of becoming a pastry chef never imagined she would fall into the hands of a demon who would change her world forever. Capone, who grew up amidst life-and-death shootouts, considered love a luxury and a joke. She was a toy for his amusement and a tool for his revenge, yet she unleashed a storm of bloodshed throughout his Mafia empire. With a simple deal, she finally won her freedom, believing their paths would never cross again. But he reappeared like a ghost, crashing her wedding, tearing her dress to shreds and destroying everything. Separated by gratitude, resentment and deep-seated enmity, he watched her disappear into the vast sea with his own eyes...

Guys here is my pitch..... In the sprawling world of fantasy, we’ve often been treated to tales of heroes reincarnated with divine blessings, legendary powers, or cheat-like abilities, thrust into magical lands as shining saviors—or chaotic terrors. But what happens when the very concept of reincarnation becomes a curse? When the divine boon is a big fat joke, and the "cheat system" doesn’t quite… cheat? Enter John, the unluckiest reincarnate. Blessed by a god and thrust into a fantasy world, he dreams of glory, power, and adventure—only to wake up as a normal, utterly powerless bird. Not a mythical phoenix, not an ancient thunder eagle. Just… a bird. To make matters worse, this world is no ordinary realm. It's a land scarred by the devastating legacies of past isekai’d heroes and villains, whose reckless exploits piled skeletons into mountains and turned their cheats into harbingers of chaos. Fed up with these unruly intruders, the ancients of the realm banded together to create a world-shaking seal: all reincarnated souls are trapped in the bodies of harmless animals, confined to isolated sanctuaries that function more like fantasy zoos. Here’s the twist: this isn’t mercy. It’s a resource grab. The powerful beast tamers of this realm have turned these reincarnated souls into exotic pets, prized for their cheat-like potential. John finds himself at the bottom of the food chain in every sense. His cheat doesn’t work. His human form is gone. And his world is filled with predatory cultivators who see him as either a snack or a tool. But John isn’t one to give up so easily. What starts as despair quickly turns into cunning survival. With wings and wit as his only tools, John must navigate layers of misfortune, dodge fate’s sharp talons, and cheat his way through a world determined to keep him grounded. Get ready to join John on a wildly unconventional journey—one where reincarnation isn’t a ticket to greatness, but a death sentence he’s determined to rewrite. His story is one of humor, wit, and persistence, as he explores a world where he is the joke and his survival is the punchline. Main tags: reincarnation/isekai, beast taming cultivation system, comedy, action, adventure. Of course No-harem!

Year 2177. Empyrean, the greatest VRMMO ever created, had long since changed the gaming world. One hundred floors stretched towards infinity, each a separate world teeming with nations, tribes, and countless races. Millions of players made this their second home, a realm where the sun rose and set, where seasons danced their eternal cycle, where life flowed like an endless river. The goal was simple yet impossible - find the key on each floor and ascend to the hundredth level. New players were meant to start their journey on one of the first three floors. But Kane Reed's fate was different. He stood alone on his floor, not yet comprehending the cruel joke destiny had played on him. It was only when he accepted the most basic of newbie quests - the eternal tradition of rat slaying - that he understood. [Current floors: 100]

Many people wish to escape this boring life, or rather, everyone does. I was no different. But back then, I hadn’t been summoned to another world. It didn’t take long for us to realize that this place was a true hell. Covered in blood, Avinash screamed, “One day, I’ll have them all beneath my feet!” Hero? What a joke.

Drake was a troublemaker with a knack for bad jokes. One of them got him killed. Now, he finds himself in Atheria, a world of magic, mythical creatures, and warring Gods. Equipped with the mysterious System of Chaos—a game-like interface that grants him skills, stats, and quests—Drake must learn to survive in this dangerous new reality. But his arrival hasn't gone unnoticed. The Gods, offended by his irreverent attitude and fearful of his unique system, have marked him for death. To live peacefully (and maybe get some payback), Drake will have to embrace his chaotic nature, master his newfound powers, and challenge the very beings who rule Atheria.

Life is stressful. Oriental mystery jokes to de-stress.

Act II - Eternal Night: After the events of The Heaven's War, Elise descended further into the dungeon to find that there were actually more vampires in the world besides her, where Enigma, alerted by the fact that she was the owner of the dungeon, descended in haste, where she encountered the greatest joke of fate. Hate surged within Enigma's heart, for she could not believe that the girl in front of her was the spitting image of her late lover. To which Enigma, in an impulse of anger, lets herself go and kills Elise in such a way as to ensure that she will not return. It is here that Enigma remembered. She remembered her past. And all the hatred she felt towards humanity the day Elise died, to which she required a way to make them all pay for their sins, so she decided to release the "Eternal Night". Inconsistent publication in this platform. Monthly in ScribbleHub.

Isekai'd After Getting Trucked: Now My Butler's a Psycho and I'm Engaged?! Blam. Depressed dude gets isekai’d via Truck-kun. Crash Plack - Wakes up in a medieval room with a 7-inch glow-up. "Haha, my dong feels bigger." But wait... feng shui is sus, and the door is locked. Cue existential crisis: "Got hit by a truck. Now I’m here. Why?" Out the window: medieval cosplay vibes. “Is this a medieval convention or…?” Resting vibes -> Finds bookshelf. Random smut novel. …makes himself at home. Knock, knock. Enter: Rizz Bidi, unhinged old "butler" who smells regret and cheap beer. "Congrats, young master! You're marrying Valeria now!" "Marry the who now!?" Forced cheers from disgruntled employees. "Why’s everyone blushing? Oh, it’s my new big dong energy." "Welcome home, Master!" Plot.exe loading…

I Dreamed of Cultivation... and Got Homework Instead! “Ah, reincarnation into a xianxia world! Time to wield swords, shoot qi bullets, and become the overlord of the heavens!” At least, that’s what Lin Mao thought would happen. Instead, he woke up in a scholar’s robe, surrounded by ink-stained fingers and people debating... philosophy. “This isn’t the path to immortality! This is the path to finals!” Now Lin Mao has to navigate his life in the prestigious Sky Moon Sect, where flying on swords is nothing but a dream. The only thing flying is debates and enlightenment that comes from philosophy, not martial arts. Instead of fighting demonic beasts, he's fighting grumpy senior brothers, mysterious sect elders, and his master that has a.......long beard. “Who needs qi cultivation when you have the ‘Path of Society’? What does that even mean?! And why does everyone here hate jokes?!” Filled with nothing but Earth’s most degenerate novels, his unhinged personality, and his special ability to accidentally piss people off, Lin Mao is determined to shake up the scholar world. He might not be a cultivator, but who says he can’t make being a scholar legendary? “This isn’t the dream I signed up for, but whatever. If they are going to make me study, I’ll do it my way!” **** This novel will be story-focused, blending humor, character development, and world-building. However, it will also include R18 elements with detailed smut for those who enjoy a little spice in their story. You’ve been warned!

"A thrilling action novel infused with jokes and a touch of life lessons."

The cards all contain a mystery, and a mystery is always something very dark and enchanting. There are people who want to know their fate, and there are people who are just curious. In general, the cards don't like to be teased and they don't know what to joke about. Sometimes there are some things, it's best not to know too much. So the card you chose, what is it?

Li Susu dies unfairly and wishes for a second chance, but fate still jokes on her. "Seriously?! Is this the second chance that I am asking for?!" She was born in a world where political struggle was the deadliest. Worst of all, she was born as the ruthless and tyrant Empress Wu Jinmai! She has no one in the world who is scary and full of political schemes. Will she be able to change her faith and live a long and happy life? What kind of sacrifices does she need to make to change her fate? "I hate you; I detest you. You're my greatest nightmare, and marrying you is like a poison that slowly kills me!" Shanguan Zu Jin suppressed his feelings for the people. He had longed for her. He wants to love and spoil her, but fate has changed her. Will his love be rekindled as the tyrant empress suddenly changes? Is there a second chance for his unrequited love, or…? Find out the answers as the story of the tyrant empress and her emperor consort begins. PS: This is purely a work of fiction. Organization, events, situations, and names are purely created by the author's imagination. Thank you.

Form an up-and-coming alchemist to the richest mage to exist, follow the journey of Seth as he walks the path paved with gold while throwing fireballs here and there. Maybe, just maybe you can get a glimpse on the Dao of wealth. Ps: This is not a cultivation novel. Ps: Don’t forget to drop a comment. Ps: Remember to like and subscribe ^-^ Ps: Just joking but do add to library.

Synopsis High school is supposed to be the time for first loves, but for Yuuto Kisaragi and his friends, it feels more like a battlefield. Each time they muster the courage to confess their feelings, they’re met with rejection, manipulation, or indifference. From the perfect honor student who toys with their emotions to the sweet girl-next-door who turns out to have a cruel streak, every encounter leaves another scar on their hearts. As the boys share their experiences of heartbreak, they begin to wonder: is it them, or is the world of dating rigged against them? What starts as a quest for love turns into a bitter journey of self-discovery and disillusionment. All Girls Are Scum is a raw and painfully honest story about the struggles of teenage boys trying to navigate relationships in a world where love often feels like a cruel joke.

Do deities play practical jokes on mortals? My new life in a new world is gratifying, so far, but I can't help but wonder why. There are no men and these women are ridiculous. One all-female race after another, in this part of the world, at least. Amazons, Elves, and Fairies; each with strange quirks and bizarre personalities. I keep collecting more of them as I try to carve out a place for myself in this world. Author's Notes: I intend this to be a lighthearted comedy, as well as a fun and intriguing power fantasy. I won't write anything disturbing, and I will make it as funny as I can. 11/21/24 I only just noticed that the webnovel reader changes my formatting. I was using an extra space between paragraphs to denote a scene change. Please leave a comment if you find any confusing parts. 11/30/24 I'm going on a trip I've been planning for a while in a couple days. I will try to keep writing and publishing while I'm away, but I expect a slower pace. 12/22/24 I've had some technical and creative difficulties writing for the past few days. But I assure you, as long as people keep reading this and I don't get too many bad reviews, I will keep writing this.

Jason was normal, or as normal as he could be, but one day all that changed. A red pentagram, chanting, and sacrifice brought him to another place another world. He had been summoned, deemed a devil , and asked to grant their wishes..... He at first thought it a joke, but reality soon hit him. He was now something he couldn't wrap his head around, an entity that could be called upon to grant people their requests, but it was not all bad. With enough whit , luck , and deception he indeed fulfilled the role of a devil, thought he didn't really know if he was one.

In the world to come, making oneself at home in a virtual realm has woven itself into the fabric of the daily grind. Online games flourishing within this digital hinterland have caught on like wildfire. It's a rare soul who hasn't caught a whisper about the mighty and their terrestrial habits and hedonism. Yet now, as life in the virtual sphere - especially within these burgeoning games - gains momentum, new titans rise within this electronic escapade. One wonders, do their existences diverge from those ensconced in real-world influence? Watch the journey of our protagonist who, through a gauntlet of trials and time, has eased into a leisurely existence as one of the esteemed five lord atop a thriving metropolis, in a community of a billion players. Though obstacles and thorns of various kinds laid in his path, he overcame them all. *** The original is in Thai, and as the writer of the original, I attempted to translate it as closely as possible. I use AI to help with the initial translation and then revise it one more time, but I only managed to achieve about 80% of what I expected. Not to mention grammar, just trying to translate jokes, idioms, proverbs, etc. so that foreigners can understand is very difficult.

He who thought that he was given the punishment of being in the darkness for eternity, Was wrong   Fate played a twisted joke on him as he was dumped in the river with his coffin.   Yet he survived, but wait, where am I fuck ,an 80-foot-tall tree? Please tell me this is earth, isn't it?   Yet with lady luck, he got to know where he was and who he was. He was in the cultivation world.   So this is who I am: Fan Yu acquiring the book of knowledge. Watch how Fan Yu survives the infinity forest with his sheer determination.

Born a rat eating orphan, Yao Qin always dreamed of power, ever since he witnessed his parents burn alive. Little did he know it would be a curse. Abducted as a child by a ghost worshiping cult and forced to undergo dark rituals, he became the anchor to the spirit of Death - the Gravewalker. Every time he dies the Gravewalker awakens him, tearing him from the jaws of oblivion. Immortality or a cruel joke? To die on a battlefield a thousand times in a single day, what blessing is there in that? Join Yao Qin in uncovering the secrets of this dark entity, his revenge against the cult - against the heavens themselves, and conquering death.

The Lazy Mage: A Prankster’s Rise to Power* --- Just like all other kids in his world (specifically the middle-lower class) Ray was given lies to... appease him and keep the cycle of 'Weeding out the Weak,' going, but when he is given an extraordinary opportunity where his memories awaken... yeah that'll make even the (arguably) richest god want him. As Ray’s reputation grow, so does the attention of the gods. Some admired his ingenuity; others wanted him destroyed. But Ray didn’t care. To him, it was all just another joke. After all, why fight fair when you can win with a punchline?

I was a normal part timer in a small cafe when one day walking down the street a man wearing mask killed me to steal my bag. just when I thought I was going to die a floating screen appears in front of my eyes... [CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE BEEN INVITED TO JOIN THE NEW WORLD] [4:58 YOU HAVE FIVE MINUTES TO MAKE THE DECISION] seriously!!! was my life was not shitty enough that now even at the time of my death these kind of jokes happening with me. in my heart I knew well that things like reincarnation doesn't happen but I have got no Choice. [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE ACCEPTED THE INVITATION] [ ELIJAH VALENTINE: A FAMOUS A* LIST ACTRESS AND MODEL] [PLEASE CLICK HERE TO TET THE MEMORIES

Chi Chi transmigrated 10 whole years ago. It was sudden, but after ten years they settled into an average life in this magical world. Though when they body they are living in matures at age 25, their system unlocks. A system they didn't really want. Though, who isn't tempted by potential super powers. *** Authors Note: Hey guys. I'm started writing this as a joke. Though low and behold it was fun so now I'm taking it seriously.

In a quiet, private room of the restaurant, the sound of shattering glass pierced the air like a gunshot. There, standing in front of the broken shards, was Robert, his face frozen in shock. The word "divorce" hung in the air, a bitter pill that he couldn't swallow. "It's a joke, right?" Robert asked, his voice shaking with disbelief. "No, I'm not joking, I want a divorce" Emily replied her voice resolute. Her words hit him like a punch to the gut, as he struggled to comprehend what she was saying. ********* In a society where arranged marriages are the norm, two strangers are forced to marry each other. They have very different personalities and interests, and they struggle to find common ground. They are bound together by a marriage contract that is intended to ensure that they will work together for the benefit of both their families. Emily Kevan, a college student with big dreams find herself in a situation that seems to have no way out. It was a leap of faith that would forever change her life, for better or worse. She felt a sense of profound frustration, knowing that she was tied to someone she had never met and knowing that she was unable to pursue a relationship with the man she truly wanted to be with. She considered divorce as a means of freeing herself from the constraints of the contract, but the terms of the agreement was clear: five years of marriage and an heir were required before a divorce could be considered. On the other hand, after years of focusing solely on his studies, Robert Rawlings graduated from university and was eager to begin the next chapter of his life. However, his parent had other plans. They informed him of a contract marriage that would tie him to a woman he had never met, and they made it clear that there was no room for discussion. Robert resigned himself to his fate, knowing that he had no choice but to comply. The question now is, will Emily divorce Robert after five years of marriage with a son? Cover image is not mine, all credit goes to the owner.

Omer has a knack for finding humor in the most unexpected places. From his witty comebacks to his lighthearted pranks, Omer's life is a whirlwind of laughter and surprises. But behind his sharp sense of humor lies a deeper story—one of resilience, self-discovery, and connection. "Joke With Omer" is a heartwarming tale that weaves comedy with moments of introspection, as Omer navigates the ups and downs of friendship, love, and the challenges that life throws his way. This book invites readers to see the world through Omer's unique lens, where every situation holds the potential for a laugh and a lesson. Whether it's turning everyday chaos into comedy or uncovering joy in the darkest moments, "Joke With Omer" is a celebration of the healing power of humor and the importance of never taking life too seriously.

If there's one phrase to describe Daniel, it would be: incredibly ugly. Born with unpleasant features, even his parents were so disappointed in him that they abandoned him at an orphanage when he was just 4 years old. In school, he endured relentless bullying and insults because of his looks. Adulthood wasn't any kinder—despite being intelligent and knowledgeable, his appearance prevented him from landing a good job. More often than not, he was fired by his bosses because his presence made others uncomfortable. But everything changed on that fateful day when Daniel was granted a mysterious cheat ability called the Unlimited Rizz System. With it, he could enhance his physical appearance and skills by completing missions to earn Rizz Points. However, these missions aren’t as simple as they seem, and the system has its own challenges in store for him…