I'M So Old Jokes

Arthur dies and is reincarnated as a spider in a dungeon teeming with monsters. Despite his new, unsettling form, his spirit remains unbroken. He discovers that by evolving, he has the potential to transform back into a human. With this hope driving him, Arthur embarks on a journey to conquer the dungeon and escape. Along the way, he encounters various monsters and other beings—some who could become allies, while others may pose a threat. As Arthur grows stronger, he uncovers secrets about the magical world and the mysterious connections that tie him to it. Determined to achieve his goal, Arthur strives to become a powerful force in this strange new magical world.

[WARNING: MATURE CONTENT] "...I have to choose a King Consort right now?!" No sooner did the young woman from Earth awake in the body of Empress Isabelle of Nevremia than she was informed she'd have to choose a King Consort to keep her throne. While she was still trying to get used to her new body, new world, and new position, her advisors insisted she marry some stranger to retain her power. "But don't Empresses get to make the rules?" As Isabelle Von Nevremia. not only is she the revered empress of a powerful country, but she has access to a special status system, which allows her to read people's names, skills, moods, and even their kinks. As well as that, there's some kind of mysterious 'challenge' system that awards her 'skill points' for successfully completing challenges. ...But all the challenges are just seducing people. How tacky... "...If I'm going to be Empress, then I won't have a king! I'm going to have a harem!"

I, the protagonist, was just an ordinary NEET, but suddenly I was reincarnated as a tiny white snake in a fantasy world where legendary creatures and gods exist. Not only that, but I awakened in a cave as the offspring of a terrifying Medusa Serpent. Armed with only my human knowledge and my indomitable mental strength, I'm forced to use cunning tactics and rapidly evolving skills to survive against far stronger monsters and humans... So begins the survival story of a former shut-in with incredible willpower, living as one of the lowest-ranked beasts in a world of magic! ᆖ Music suddenly started playing in my head. I'd been waiting for this moment for so long. 'Snakes! Assemble' ....

[ KISAH INI TERDAPAT UNSUR KEKERASAN DAN PEMBUNUHAN. DILARANG KERAS UNTUK DITIRU! ] Berawal dari membunuh, Rio melanjutkan hidupnya menjadi seorang kanibal yang ditakuti semua orang. Bahkan namanya kini begitu dikenal seantero Amerika Serikat. Rio Vicious, orang mengenalnya dengan sebutan itu. Setiap kali dia membunuh, pasti korbannya itu langsung dia santap untuk menjadi makanannya dan hanya menyisakan sebuah tulang belulang. Bahkan jika tidak ada waktu, dia akan menyantap korbannya itu langsung tanpa dibunuh atau dilukai sedikitpun. Seperti layaknya zombie yang kelaparan. Raynald Devil adalah sebutan untuk sang adik. Dia menjalani kriminalitas bersama sang kakak. Sama halnya dengan Rio, Ray lebih memilih memakan daging manusia. Sampai akhirnya kedua kakak beradik itu bertemu dengan seorang gadis yang ternyata seorang pembunuh juga, dia bernama Ify Killer. Gadis itu mengikuti jejak kedua kakak beradik tersebut untuk menjadi seorang kanibal yang menikmati setiap potongan daging manusia dan darah. Bagaimana perjalanan hidup ketiga pembunuh itu? Apakah mereka akan berakhir di penjara? Atau masih berkeliaran di sekitaran Amerika serikat?

Reincarnated into a Dating-Sim sounds fun? But what if you have never heard about that "World of Myst" game? And that is exactly what happened to Sam Roland. Poor Sam with only basic-dating experience, had no idea he was supposed to "capture" the women he is hiding from.

In the slums of Tunisia, survival is a daily battle. Ayman, with no education or prospects, is offered a lifeline: the chance to become a hitman. But this is no glamorous life of international assassins—it's a brutal, dangerous world where every decision comes with deadly consequences. As Ayman plunges deeper into the underworld, he faces more than just the violence of his work. The emotional scars are the hardest to bear. Torn between survival and morality, he must confront the raw truths about the choices he’s making and the person he’s becoming. In this dark, emotionally charged story, Ayman’s journey is filled with contradictions: love and loss, guilt and ambition, despair and fleeting hope. As the hits become darker and the stakes rise, the question looms: How much of himself will Ayman sacrifice to protect those he loves?

After spending too much time in front of the tv. I realized that my life was a joke. I ruined my apartment. Messed up and in tears. The TV flickered on with a bizarre message... "You've been selected for the Intergalactic Game Show!" Before I could realize what it meant, I was slammed through 3 floors of my apartment building, and taken into space. Abducted, and forced into sick games. If only I knew what would happen sooner...

Like any 18 year old high school student, Kim Ji-Hye was just busy struggling with expectations and exams. The biggest worries? Overbearing parents and college entrance exams. That, of course, was the case until she accidentally found herself in an unexpected circumstance that led straight into the glowing gates of death! One moment, she was zoning out on an empty school corridor. The next? She was smack in the middle of a field that was way too over dramatic with the moon lighting up the surrounding and to add to it all, questioning all her life decisions. “What the hell? Where the HELL AM I?" Before she managed to figure out whether she had been taken hostage, sedated, or was indeed deceased, the reality had another surprise in store for her. The field evaporated. She was now in a never-ending white void. “Ah right, that is just brilliant. Another case of teleportation. Is my life really that boring that I actually find this exciting?” “Why do you think so?” a deep, unbothered voice replied. Ji-Hye screamed. Floating, there in front of her was a god that was the epitome of ‘a literal god.’ “WHO ARE YOU?” The God sighed. “Welcome Ji-Hye. I do not really know how you made it here, but… yeah, this is awkward.” Ji-Hye blinked. “Am I dead?” "Is that your final guess?" "Nope." “Then where am I?” "Alternate reality." “And how did I get here?” "Because your universe's God did an ‘oopsie’ and misplaced you." “Excuse me?” Apparently, some celestial treasure named Ezekiel was supposed to keep her safely in her time screwed up so badly that she ended up in a reality she wasn’t even supposed to exist in. THANKS EZEKIEL! "So what now?" Ji-hye asked, still trying to process the fact that divine beings are capable of making stupid mistakes The god who introduced himself in a head-turning fashion as Kashigami sighed once more. “Well, I need to send you back… but the thing is, I have no clue which universe is yours. So it might take some time.” “And how long is ‘some time’?” “Perhaps 500 years.” Ji-hye’s eyes had never been so wide. “WHAT IN THE FU–” And there started the journey which I (the author) could describe in many different ways, but for Ji-hye, it was undoubtedly the most unhinged. ✨ READ NOW TO FIND OUT: ✔ How does Ji-hye handle being an anomaly? ✔ Will Kashigami ever be useful? (Spoiler: Probably not.) ✔ Will she ever return home, or is she stuck in this SPACE WARP forever? 5K VIEWS CELEBRATION! JOIN THE DISCORD SERVER https://discord.gg/9Y2KUg3e

Heartbroken after catching her boyfriend cheating with his colleague on Valentine's Day, Anya impulsively proposes to a stranger in a fit of rage. The stranger, a charming and enigmatic man, accepts her proposal without hesitation. As Anya grapples with the consequences of her impulsive decision, she discovers that her "husband" is not just a random passerby, but someone with a mysterious and powerful connection to her life. He's not just a stranger; he's her boyfriend's boss, a man known for his wealth and influence, but who has kept his true identity hidden from Anya. Now, trapped in a web of lies and deceit, Anya must navigate the treacherous waters of her unexpected marriage while uncovering the truth about her "husband" and his hidden agenda.

In a world of unknown horrors and nightmares, one man walks through it all without purpose, uncovering the various mysteries and unsettling truths hidden from the view of the masses.

I got completely hooked on this web novel, and suddenly, I was sucked into my phone! Now, I'm stuck in another world, turned into a pathetic level one bat. The system has made it clear: I can't go back home until I claw my way up to the rank of Dark Lord!

Ethan had hit rock bottom. His company stolen, his engagement shattered, and his future reduced to nothing but regrets, he stood at the edge of despair—until a mysterious ring changed everything. Now, against all logic, he’s been randomly recruited by the Omniversal Exploration Society (OES)—a chaotic, decentralized organization tasked with exploring the infinite unknown. With a sarcastic, jaded hologram named Galen as his “mentor,” Ethan quickly learns that exploration isn’t about peaceful discovery. It’s about fighting for your life against creatures that shouldn’t exist, surviving in realms that defy reality, and somehow not dying in the process. Of course, all the while, balancing the 'normal' life of a human.

The secret to feeding a crew of hungry alien pirates? A contract with a demon. Lusac is just a lowly member of a space pirate crew in the civil war-plagued Cinder Rock Galaxy. But everything changes for him one day when the Demon in his fridge offers him a system. Finally, Lusac can level up and unlock new [skills]. The only catch? It’s a cooking system. And [Chef] Lusac has no experience in the kitchen. As Lusac and his crewmates travel along The Astral Highway (a messy network of wormholes connecting the entire galaxy) plundering rich planets and taking on jobs from wealthy clients, will he be able to use his new system to become more than just a decent cook? What To Expect: -Weak to strong MC -Secondary FMC with intersecting storylines -Action interspersed with cozy cooking chapters -A vast, unique galaxy where Humans are NOT the dominant species "Cooking" designates a cooking chapter [V] designates a Varyna chapter Release Schedule: Daily by 13:15 EST For the 10 latest chapters, please visit the official TAH Patreon! patreon.com/Raine3 **This is story is a joint project by Currer, Acton, and Elis Raine. It is also available on Royal Road.**

“Im not evil”, Is what “they” used to tell me in therapy , I never believed them though, I’m what the world would call a dark triad, A True Psychopath. Seen my first body when I was 11, I didn’t throw up, look in disgust, I laughed, I was the one who killed him, Why would I look in disgust it was my own work. I was proud of my work.

The young woman woke gasping for air in a hospital bed, unsure as to where she lay or who she was. Not your typical story of amnesia though, memories float on the edges, as if taunting her- being kept from her. With the help of a strange man, she begins her life anew, enrolling in an academy for people who have died and come back from beyond, such as herself. Navigating the unknown both in her own head and around her, will Lynx find herself in a sea of corpses or freeing herself from shackles that she cannot remember the origin of? Heedless of her own struggle, life goes on; and rising tensions between humanity and demon kind cause struggles and skirmishes left and right- will Lynx, a young new demon, decide that there is no place for her in such a struggle as one who has only just BECOME a demon? Or, is she the perfect candidate to step in and attempt to broker peace? https://discord.gg/8gEyAfYt8j PSA; YURI/GxG INVOLVED PSA; COVER IS JUST A PLACEHOLDER OF AN ANIME GIRL NAMED LYNX UNTIL I HAVE MY OWN ART PRODUCED, IT WAS IN MY FILES AS LYNX.JPG

Damien Crowell was just a regular high school student who took a regular tunnel on his way to school—until one day, that tunnel spit him out into a completely different world. Instead of his usual path, he finds himself in a dark forest that stretches on for days, running on nothing but sheer stubbornness and a tiny water bottle. Just when he thinks he's going to die, he stumbles upon a castle straight out of a fairy tale (or a theme park) and promptly passes out. When he wakes up, he's in a prison cell, surrounded by confusingly handsome men who speak gibberish—until a beautiful, horned beastman with perfect hair and a translator necklace finally lets him understand. Now, trapped in a fantasy world where every guy looks like they stepped out of a modeling agency, Damien’s biggest challenge isn’t just survival—it’s trying to figure out why *he* always looks like a mess in comparison. Can he make it back home, or will he end up staying just to admire all the beautiful faces? Join Damien as he navigates a strange new world, awkward introductions, and a whole lot of unexpected feels in this hilarious, fantasy adventure! Check my Wattpad: https://www.wattpad.com/user/Aoki_Kun520 Join my Patreon: patreon.com/Aoki_Kun520 Join my LINE Group: https://line.me/R/ti/g/r8NgVY8w5F

*THIS NOVEL IS NETORI* ------------------------------------------------------------------ I woke up in the world of a trash game. Spring Dreams Academy—a visual novel infamous for its indecisive protagonist and frustrating endings. I’d cursed the game, raged at its terrible story, and vowed never to touch it again. But now? I’m stuck in it. Worse, I’m not the main character. I’m just some random background nobody. But here’s the thing: if I’m here, I’m not playing by the script. That dense idiot of a protagonist doesn’t deserve the amazing heroines who practically throw themselves at him. He doesn’t appreciate any of them. So, I’ll take them instead. Every event, every choice, every path in this game? I’ll make it mine. I’m not here to sit back and let things play out the way they were written. This time, I’m rewriting everything. Because if the game’s protagonist can’t handle his heroines, I’ll show them what it’s like to have someone who actually cares.

A serial killer whos ritual is about changing the lives of those he fixes. he considers himself an angel or an invisible life coach as he eliminates, and manipulates the lives of others for the benefit of his charge.

The world Abe Hakashi knew is gone. The monsters saw to that. After mysterious rifts tore through Earth, humanity’s population was decimated, dropping from 8 billion to a mere million. Some escaped through the rifts, venturing into strange new worlds. Others weren’t so fortunate, succumbing to the horrors that poured from hellish gateways called "bridges." In the ruins of civilization, the survivors built Stargaze City, a fragile beacon of hope in an unforgiving world. At its heart lies a unique rift—a gateway to a dungeon that grants those brave enough to enter magical abilities known as skills. These powers are humanity’s last line of defense, the only way to push back against the endless threats that stalk the land.

Ji Wushuang, once the revered Sword Sovereign, feared by both gods and demons, met an untimely death at the hands of her closest kin. Betrayed, her body was destroyed, leaving no trace behind. But fate had other plans. She was reborn, not as the powerful being she once was, but as a powerless orphan with her spiritual bones stolen, unable to cultivate. However, being a "waste" is no obstacle for Ji Wushuang. Her determination remains unbroken, and she quickly becomes the treasured disciple of the Five Great Masters. Yet, her happiness is short-lived. She soon discovers a shocking truth—her masters and fellow disciples, all of whom are heirs of the greatest fortunes, are nothing but "nourishment" for the so-called "Chosen Ones" in this world. Her First Master’s disciple, a genius in medicine and poison, is tricked and has her spiritual roots destroyed by a deceptive lover. The Second Master’s heir, a beauty with a kind heart, is lured into a trap by a demonic woman and ends up losing her life and cultivation. The Third Master’s pupil, despite reaching the peak of cultivation, remains a devoted servant to his unworthy love, only to be left with nothing. And the misfortune doesn’t stop there. Every disciple of the Five Great Masters is led to ruin, their fates sealed by betrayal, sacrifice, and death. But Ji Wushuang isn’t the type to sit back and watch. Angered and heartbroken by the fate of her loved ones, she decides to take matters into her own hands. With a powerful vengeance, she unleashes her true power, determined to save her fallen disciples and protect them from the sinister forces at play. She doesn’t care how many times she must strike her enemies or how ruthless she must be. Even if it costs her life, she will make sure the guilty pay. In a world where destinies are manipulated and heroes fall, Ji Wushuang rises again. She rekindles her masters’ and disciples' broken spirits, helping them all transcend their pasts. Reborn with unmatched power, they become ruthless warriors, each more formidable than before. Ji Wushuang, the once powerless "waste" disciple, is now the most coveted treasure in the world—no longer the "forgotten" one, but the greatest legend of all. This is the tale of revenge, rebirth, and the unbreakable bonds of loyalty. In the end, even the heavens will tremble at the rise of Ji Wushuang, the immortal sword master who defied fate itself.

WSA 2024 entry novel Synopsis Getting Reincarnated as the Biblical Devil isn't something our protagonist ever thought was possible. He was a firm believer and knew how powerful God and the Angels were, they are existence that are not to be thrived with especially God. But here he was as the Archangel Samael, the left hand of God or the poison of God casted from Heaven to hell for rebelling against his Father, God. "what is the meaning of this, is this God's doing" our protagonist wondered as he knew very well that there is no way that the Almighty would not know something about this. So he decided to wait a little while to see what would happen to him but something else happened, what he had expected did not happened, so he has to take in the fact that he is now the new Devil, the Lord of Hell, Lucifer Bloody Morningstar. check out my other works. The Omnipotent System My Infinite System

"Ah... I think I'm dying." Caiden’s final breath escaped him as he slumped against the cold, unforgiving earth, his blood pooling like the depths of his regret. The weight of his failure was crushing. This damned life. This cursed story. And damn it all, Lorian. The continent’s golden hero. The shining protagonist. Caiden had been just an ordinary man from Earth. Now, he was stranded on Gaia, a world where steel clashed and magic roared. By Lorian’s side, he fought, forged bonds, won battles, and faced impossible odds. But beneath the surface of their camaraderie, envy festered—poisoning his every thought, drowning him in despair. And then, the betrayal. He turned on Lorian. And everything came crashing down. "Shit..." As darkness closed in, Caiden braced for eternal silence, the cold grip of death taking hold. But then, it all stopped. He woke up. Back where it all began. "... F*ck. Not again." A second chance—he didn’t ask for it, but here it was. Caiden must now navigate a world full of Yokai, rewrite his own fate, and—above all—avoid betraying Lorian a second time. Because, in this story, where he’s nothing but a side character in someone else’s epic, the odds will always be stacked against him.

"I'm not impressed." He said and Kalina guessed the laughter in his words. "Still." She returned, trying to match his amusement and completely failing. That man had a knack for annoying her, that was for sure. ¿Why? Kalina didn't know for sure. She felt a little stupid about the discovery, but there was something else. Something attracted her to him, that was undeniable.

Hi, Please this book would be deleted and reuploaded later next year. I want to focus on my other book, "The Alpha's Twins Have Different Fathers" first. Thank You. ********* Darragh Gallagher, the first son of the president, has heard a number of hush-hush rumours about his wife, so he disguised himself as a substitute bodyguard to see what he could find out, only for the dumb younger sister to lay a false claim on him as the one responsible for her pregnancy, making him lose his job on the first day. But what happens when both he and his mother could hear the girl's thoughts and both of them end up doing everything that she wanted? What happens then when they find out the truth about the real father of her babies through her thoughts? What are they going to do then? Just what are the odds? *************************** Kenia's mother-in-law threatened to bring another wife for her son because she has been unable to give her a grandchild. After several trying but still failing to conceive for her husband of three years, Kenia tricked her teenage sister into becoming a surrogate mother for her husband in secret. But after she too became pregnant weeks later, she decided to get rid of her sister and the bastard in her womb altogether. * 1524 In an attempt to help her sister, Catriona Byrne became the catalyst that sent her to an early death.  At the gallows for her own dismemberment after avenging her, Catriona smiled as she happily awaited the swift death.  But being reincarnated into the pregnant body of her sister in a new world was something that Cat could never imagine. So, not wanting to face the same fate as the host body, she decided to find a new father for her baby. And that was why she pointed to her father's new bodyguard as the one responsible for her pregnancy. ******************** Note: This author would not give warnings for any scene in the book. So please make sure that you're in the right frame of mind before you start reading.  Thank you and sorry in advance.

Thirty years ago, a great battle shook the borders of the Yangtze River Coast. Two ancient powers, the Dragon Clan and the Tiger Clan, fought until blood flowed down the coast. That battle ended the life of the Dragon Clan's Ancestor, marking an absolute victory for the Tiger Clan, but leaving behind an undying grudge. Twenty-seven years passed, and the Dragon Clan's revenge burned again. In the shadow of their fallen ancestors, they return, bearing the embers of war to avenge lost honor. Lei Bai and Lei Yu, are two brothers who know nothing about the bloody grudge passed down by their parents' Clan. However, a cruel fate binds them in an unavoidable battle—to kill for the Clan or protect for the sake of the same blood.

Omer has a knack for finding humor in the most unexpected places. From his witty comebacks to his lighthearted pranks, Omer's life is a whirlwind of laughter and surprises. But behind his sharp sense of humor lies a deeper story—one of resilience, self-discovery, and connection. "Joke With Omer" is a heartwarming tale that weaves comedy with moments of introspection, as Omer navigates the ups and downs of friendship, love, and the challenges that life throws his way. This book invites readers to see the world through Omer's unique lens, where every situation holds the potential for a laugh and a lesson. Whether it's turning everyday chaos into comedy or uncovering joy in the darkest moments, "Joke With Omer" is a celebration of the healing power of humor and the importance of never taking life too seriously.

An anthology of different ancient warriors and their experiences.

Life is unfair. That's something I figured out when I was young. It's not just life but the world itself is unfair. I was an orphan who joined a game design company trying to survive. But I was fired when the owner's son wanted the damn job. Thankfully I had backup plans. However, all those were thrown out the window when I was thrust into the world of one of the stories I created. My first story. And honestly, I felt...happy. This was a place where I could take advantage of everything! I could live a peaceful yet rich life! All I had to do was follow the story. There was one problem though. I was an extra. And to add to that I had no memory of who I was. ___________ Ok so just a little disclaimer this is obviously based on The Author's POV but I did also base it mostly on ORV as well as IOAMI

In Heroes of Cartea, the Gods send seven deadly trials to test humanity, unleashing dark beasts and dungeons born from black mana. The Hero, driven mad after killing the woman he loved—only to discover she was a demon's puppet—spirals into despair. Emilia, a seasoned gamer, wakes up in this brutal world, inhabiting the body of a noble at the Academy, one of 13 Saintess candidates. No matter the path she takes, she's doomed to die—whether as a villainess, a tragic side character, or a mere extra. Each time she reveals a piece of the future, her body weakens, yet death never claims her. Adelaide, the female lead and Emilia's adopted sister, becomes the center of rumors, accusing Emilia of jealousy and cruelty. Raphael, their half-brother, begins to turn against Adelaide in disgust. He once never harmed her, but now he looks at her as a "disgusting monster." Meanwhile, the true male lead—Adelaide's former fiancé and the Hero, Noah Denovian—clings desperately to Emilia’s fate. Falling to his knees, he pleads, "I’ll destroy everything—humans, all of it—just don’t leave me." All Emilia wants is to survive, prevent the Great War, and find her way back home. But with the story unraveling, can she escape her fate?