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Eastenders Darren Miller

Collateral Flux

Blaze of Glory A fart-propelled sniper. A time-traveling scientist with a broken hand. A sentient custard blob humming Glenn Miller. Together, they will accidentally break time, punch a god, and save existence from being edited into a bland Wikipedia entry. It starts on D-Day, 1944. Dr. Juniper Flux, a future-born, sarcasm-loaded chronologist with a glitchy time machine and a chroniton-infected arm, crash-lands smack into World War II. She’s supposed to observe quietly. Instead, she teams up with Hank Rigby — a flatulent sniper-poet with Dragonbone scars, a tragic past, and exactly zero impulse control. Together, they dodge Nazis, awaken a sentient custard blob named Yoggy, and ruin the multiverse's carefully curated silence. History gets rewritten. Gods get angry. One explodes from emotional oversaturation. Fifteen years later, the universe is broken. Entire timelines are being "shushed" by Reapers — cosmic librarians with giant scissors who hate jazz, love order, and really want everyone to just be quiet forever. Enter: the Custard Rebellion. Now, armed with a memory-firing revolver, a jazz-powered war mech, timeline tacos, and the collective trauma of an exploded pantheon, Juni, Hank, Kaelen Thorn (the last god of noise), and Yoggy must sing, scream, fart, and fight their way to the heart of the Greater — a being trying to delete every spark of emotion from reality. It’s loud. It’s messy. It’s glorious. And it smells faintly of burned tortillas and cosmic regret. [five star] “Finally, a book that combines time travel, emotional damage, jazz warfare, sentient desserts, and fart-based heroics. I laughed, I cried, I loudly declared war on the Reapers using only a kazoo. If you don’t read this, you hate fun.” Deadpool (Probably)
Ranjit_Singh_6096 · 6.1K Views

¡Mia no es una alborotadora!

``` La familia Miller tenía una problemática en la familia. Su nombre era Amelia Miller. Su madre murió en el parto cuando ella nació. Su madrastra se cayó de una escalera mientras estaba embarazada y murió. El padre de Amelia la castigaba haciéndola enfrentarse a la pared en el ático. El ático era oscuro y húmedo, y no había nada de luz solar. Nadie le llevaba comida, y Amelia pensaba que podría muy bien morir allí. Momentos antes de su muerte, marcó un número que su madre le había dicho antes de fallecer. Después de colgar, hubo sonidos de estruendo a su alrededor. La residencia de la familia Miller estaba rodeada por un grupo de guardaespaldas vestidos de negro. Ocho hombres salieron de sus autos, cada uno con un aura distinta. Fueron directo al ático. El hombre que los lideraba se puso de rodillas y sostuvo a Amelia, inconsciente, en sus brazos. Tenía una expresión solemne en su rostro. —La familia Miller necesita declararse en bancarrota. Después de dormir toda la noche, Amelia despertó y descubrió que su padre estaba en bancarrota. Los miembros de su familia estaban todos sin hogar. Mientras tanto, ella... Ella tenía ocho tíos y un abuelo amable que la querían mucho. El padre de Amelia se arrepintió de lo que hizo, y no estaba dispuesto a aceptar su destino. —¿Y qué si Amelia ahora vivía una buena vida? ¡Ella seguía siendo la problemática que había matado a su madre y dejado a su padre en bancarrota! Poco sabía él que, después de que Amelia regresara a la casa de su tío, su suerte solo parecía mejorar. ¡Incluso su abuela postrada en cama ahora podía levantarse y bailar en la plaza! Finalmente, un hombre como de Dios afirmó ser su padre. La mimaba hasta el punto de que el mundo entero la envidiaba. ```
Nunu · 117.9K Views

THE SYSTEM THAT COULDN'T EVEN

THE SYSTEM THAT COULDN’T EVEN A Multiversal Breakdown in 404 Chapters or Less. Imagine if a post-apocalyptic webnovel took a toaster bath during a firmware update, woke up with a pigeon on its face, and forgot how to be a story. Now imagine that’s the plot. Welcome to The System That Couldn’t Even, a glorious middle finger to every overused webnovel cliché, written like someone locked Deadpool in a library full of light novels and gave him a typewriter made of spite. Meet Dave Miller He’s not the Chosen One. He’s not an elite cultivator. He doesn't get truck-kun’d. He’s not secretly royalty, a genius, or a demon lord’s reincarnated cat. He’s just a guy. A very tired guy. And unfortunately for the multiverse, he’s the only one who won’t cooperate with the System that’s supposed to save reality. When Dave’s malfunctioning Apocalypse Survival System tries to turn his life into a power fantasy, he glitches the tutorial, flips off the narrator, and kicks the plot in the nethers. Now reality itself is unraveling. The System’s breaking. The tropes are panicking. The Librarian, an eldritch AI who keeps the narrative universe “on brand,” wants him erased. Dave? He just wants to nap and eat expired canned soup in peace. Let’s Roast the Webnovel Genre, Shall We? This novel brutally parodies: System stories where MCs gain 300 skills and zero personality Villainess reincarnation arcs with more face-slaps than brain cells "Trash family" drama where everyone hates the MC for exactly 1 chapter until he's OP Academy arcs that are just Hogwarts with more trauma Cultivation levels named like shampoo products: “Qi Foundation Super Ultra Jade Core – Level 9” If you've ever rolled your eyes at another “cold and aloof CEO,” screamed at a “dense MC who accidentally builds a harem,” or wondered how everyone in these stories has twelve cheat skills before puberty — this book is for you. It’s not a power fantasy. It’s a power outage. Cast Includes: Dave Miller – Glitch in the matrix. Avatar of narrative rebellion. Cannot be trusted near plot devices or emotional scenes. Unit Alpha – A pigeon. Talks in autotune. Possibly God. Definitely a threat to continuity. Lumina Starshard – Hacker. Anti-Chosen One. Carries the story’s lore and its emotional weight while screaming. Ryuuji Kurogane – Reformed edgelord. Ex-rider of the motorcycle of defiance. Now wields glitter and sass. The Librarian – Your favorite villain’s favorite AI. Wants everyone neatly filed under “trope-compliant.” Hates Dave. With reason. What to Expect: Timeline-pruning bureaucrats Reality collapsing under sarcasm Talking pigeons as emotional support weapons Plot armor sold on black markets Heartfelt scenes ruined by fart jokes Fourth-wall demolitions Meta-horror inside abandoned tropes Actual emotional trauma buried under comedy Tags: Satirical Apocalypse | Anti-System | Webnovel Roast | Found Family with Brain Damage | Fourth Wall Abuse | Talking Animals | Meta Fiction | The Plot is Alive and It’s Mad | Existential Glitch Comedy | Weaponized Pacing Errors | Angst with Bonus Pigeon Summary in One Line: "What if the MC said ‘no’ to the plot — and the entire multiverse broke trying to fix him?"
1617_Ranjit_singh · 5.7K Views

Fake Date, Real Fate

"Block him." "He's technically still my boss." "Then block him with dignity." The call ended again. And then started again. I let out a sound somewhere between a growl and a sob, then finally answered with the enthusiasm of a snail crawling through salt. "Yes, Mr. Walton?" "Have you changed your mind yet?" I collapsed onto the towel and gazed at the sky as though it might consume me entirely if I pleaded sweetly enough. "Do you ever take a break?" I asked, shielding my eyes with one hand. "You're avoiding the question." "Because it's a dumb question." He exhaled, the sound sharp and irritated even over phone. "It's not a dumb question. It's a business offer." "It's a weird offer-one that I already said no to." There was a brief pause, and I could practically hear him clenching his jaw through the speaker. "You are acting unreasonably." " Unreasonable?" I sat up. "I'm not the one drafting fake girlfriend contracts like it's a normal Tuesday." "Isabella-" "Certainly not, Mr. Walton." I mimicked his tone perfectly. "I told you I'm not doing it. You need to find someone else to play pretend with." SYNOPSIS Isabella Miller thought saying no to her boss’s fake dating offer was the end of the story. But Adrien Walton doesn’t take no—especially not when he’s convinced she’s a gold digger. Suddenly, her student loans are piling up, her father’s vet clinic is on the brink of eviction and her brother is about to be kicked out of college. Coincidence? She thinks not. Adrien Walton is calm, calculating—and he's just pulled every string to corner Isabella into the perfect position. Now she’s stuck choosing between pride and survival. So she agrees to his offer: be his fake girlfriend. No feelings attached. No drama. Just business. Or so she thought. "Conference Room B. Fifteen minutes," he said, passing by without a glance. The folder he pushed across the table landed with a thud. I opened it. The contract. All of it. --- Enemies to lovers? Check. Slow burn? Hmmnyea. Banter so sharp it might file your nails? Yes. Delicious workplace tension? Of course. Tension that could melt steel?Absolutely. Smut?? Wanna find out? Welcome to corporate romance warfare. There’s no escaping this contract.
PrimRosee · 207.1K Views

My Alien Boyfriend Lives Next Door

My Alien Boyfriend Next Door: Seventeen-year-old Zoe Miller's life in a quiet, ordinary town is anything but normal, especially when the mysterious Vian family moves in next door just before senior year. Zoe, a quirky loner with a secret obsession for alien conspiracies, is immediately drawn to Asher, the new family's impossibly handsome, quiet, and intensely observant son. Their connection is instant and undeniable, fueled by an inexplicable pull Zoe can't understand, and a potent, biological mating bond that Asher, an alien from the advanced Vian civilization, struggles to hide. As their secret romance blossoms—from awkward shared meals, to quiet study sessions interrupted by Zoe's suspicious Sheriff father, David, and finally, to a first kiss on a trampoline—Asher finds himself falling irrevocably for Zoe. He reveals his true identity and the truth of his family's fugitive status from their own rigid Vian High Council. Their love deepens, cementing their mating bond, and when Zoe discovers she's pregnant with a hybrid alien-human child, their lives are thrown into high-stakes chaos. David, meanwhile, has been meticulously investigating the Vians, his lawman's gut screaming something is wrong. When he finds explicit messages between Zoe and Asher, his fury erupts, leading to a public confrontation. In the aftermath, Asher's parents, Elena and Ryan, desperate to protect their son and their anonymity, attempt a memory wipe on Asher. But the completed mating bond proves stronger than Vian technology, and Asher's memories (and his knowledge of the baby) are restored by Zoe's touch. Now fully aware of the escalating danger, Zoe discovers David has contacted Area 51. With her mother, Clara, as her heartbroken, secret confidante, Zoe makes the agonizing choice to run away with Asher and his parents. Their escape is desperate, constantly threatened by specialized government units and the terrifying onset of separation sickness if Asher and Zoe are apart for more than a day. The stakes skyrocket when David, unable to let go, uses a burner phone to trick Zoe into a meeting, leading to her capture. At the clandestine facility, David makes a horrifying discovery: his daughter is pregnant. Shattered by this truth, he chooses his daughter and unborn grandchild over his mission, orchestrating a daring escape. The reunited family, now with David as an unlikely ally, embarks on a desperate race to an ancient Vian pyramid, the only place capable of a memory reset that will erase all human knowledge of them. "My Alien Boyfriend Next Door" is a story of extraordinary love, sacrifice, and the enduring power of family, proving that even across galaxies, some bonds are truly forever.
Karinakarina · 2.8K Views
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