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Blond Humour

Kiltering Mayhem

Front page is Not "ÉXZEDRYA MERZÏRY THRÄMKNER" just a hungry bunny searching for Mister Carrot. Next in line are, THE NOT SO TALL WOMAN (ZIFARLIA), CITRONELLA, The RECEPCIONIST, THE NOT SO OLD HAG and QUEEN MIREYA, (THE BLONDE YOUNG MAN and THE ALBINE are ready along with, VERIZON, (Comment if you want to see any specific character in the corresponding section, and cheer for your favorite!). (I am working on the Æzh'Xinder) After having his Military Service extended from four to twenty two years due to an administrative error, "Drïekvïer", Better known as "Trektör" or "The Worst Nightmare Of The Farioth", is abruptly forced to stop his deployment, all because the change of a law in the Nation he choose to live in. Said law forbid anyone under 78 years to be in active militar duty, him being almost 45 and considered a Veteran doesn't help him in the slightest to make an exception. With this unexpected development, he decide to try something new and impulsive by taking the "Talent" test of the neighboring country in order to obtain a "Profession" and qualify for one of the most prestigious Academies in the gigantic planet of "Clarattoia". To achieve this, is mandatory to have a score of "7", of a maximum of 22.5, after all, with out a Profession is impossible to access "Protocol" and nurture the hidden beast inside all of us. Additional information: NO CHEATS NO PLOT ARMOR NO VANILLA EASY LIFE (So Don't Get Fooled By The Start, about the first 125 chapters, I know that I don't have that many) If you want a story in which there is face slapping of dumb characters or everyone is friendly after a few random words, This is not for you. There is a bit of everything in this story, so be prepared, is the only warning anyone is going to get, yet, smut is must in life. Mondays, Tuesdays, Fridays and Saturdays One Chapter. Wednesdays and Thursdays Two Chapters. Sundays Minimum Two Chapters. (If My schedule allows me, more or less chapters will be published) Lastly, I am not an English native speaker, so any mistake i commit, feel free to point it out so I can correct it as soon as possible.
Marshack · 30.3K Views

Reign of Obsession

King Niklaus Mikaelson, a name that resonated with both fear and reverence across the Mythralian Peninsula, was a figure shrouded in a dark, commanding aura. His reputation as the most ruthless and strongest ruler had been etched into the annals of history through countless conquests and acts of sheer dominance. The Kingdom of Emberlyn, his seat of power, had become a formidable force under his iron-fisted rule, expanding relentlessly as he sought to unite the entire peninsula beneath his banner. Niklaus was a man who wielded authority like a weapon, his charisma a tool for bending others to his will. To the world, he was the epitome of power and allure, the man every woman desired and every rival feared. Yet, beneath his striking exterior and regal bearing lay a darkness as deep and unyielding as the obsidian blade he kept sheathed at his side. In the resplendent Kingdom of Aquarion, where the gentle whispers of the wind and the serene beauty of the landscape paint a portrait of tranquility, Princess Emily Wilson stands as a luminous enigma. As the eldest and middle daughter of King Wilson, Emily is a figure both revered and shrouded in mystery, a living legend whose beauty is spoken of in hushed, reverent tones. Emily’s physical beauty is legendary, though it remains largely unseen by the world beyond her family. Her rare blue eyes, deep and mesmerizing, are said to capture the essence of the sky and the sea, reflecting a depth of emotion and intelligence that transcends mere appearance. Her blonde hair, a cascade of sunlit strands, frames her face with a halo of ethereal light, adding to her mystique. To those who have glimpsed her, Emily is a vision of unparalleled grace, a princess whose beauty is as captivating as it is elusive. Yet, Emily’s allure extends far beyond her physical appearance. She embodies a unique blend of wisdom, strength, and purity, qualities that make her a formidable presence in her kingdom. Her wisdom is profound, her decisions guided by an insight that belies her years. She approaches her role with a sense of purpose and clarity, balancing the weight of her responsibilities with the grace of a true leader.
Weirdo_Python · 43.2K Views

The Vampire's Moonlit Throne

It was advised to think thrice before crossing paths with him but she didn’t even think once and ran right into the lion's den… ___ In an ominous, haunted night, Elara Celine fled from the forces that shattered her whole life in just one night. She ran for her life but little does the poor girl know about the curse she is destined to be bound with. She has no idea about the unimaginable power which lies dormant beneath her broken, trembling and helpless body. Alone in the world, carrying the pain of a murdered family and covered in blood, her misery drags her to the Dark Lord's Castle. A place no sane man even thinks to seek refuge at… but an insane woman does… Where she is desperate for refuge and revenge, Ravenor Frostveil can instantly smell the power hidden beneath her fragile appearance. The man whose name is never dared taken aloud but whispered… The man who runs the dangerous underworld of crime and deception with the tip of his finger. The man who is touched and tainted by the dark side itself. In return for safety and revenge, Elara Celine makes a deal with the Dark Lord, the devil himself. The deal she is soon going to regret… One is light, the other shadow, destined to destroy each other… But in this dance of deception and hunger for power, will a forbidden desire bloom amidst the shadows of hatred, or will darkness consume them both? ——— Underlying themes: > Enemies to Loves (Very intense) > Weak to strong FL and tragic past ML > Slow burn > Gothic setting with Castles, academies, dangerous quests and many such adventures > Hints of humour and comedy > Violence, gore and very intense scenes but triggers warnings will be given above such chapters. —— The schedule is everyday posting but more support will equal more chapters!
DaisyLight · 30.4K Views

Sword in Stone

Artie had lived her whole life feeling like a joke. Whether it came to her full name, her parents ‘abandoning’ her and her next door neighbours taking her in, or finding out that her lover was part of a cult and was cheating on her. Said lover then stabbed her. It felt like she just couldn’t catch a break. So when she found herself in a puddle of her own blood, staring up at a fake painted sky, she could only find humour in the situation, and prayed that the next life was kinder. Only she woke up. In the same body, with the same stab wound, only in a world full of magic, swords, and a dead King Arthur? Yup. The round table existed, the knights existed, and so did everyone of legend that she’d heard about as a child. Only it was the beginning of their tales. Nothing had happened yet, except the formation of Camelot, the crowning of the King, and then the sudden death of the King of Legend, King Arthur Pendragon. She would have thought this was another cruel joke if everyone wasn’t wandering around in mourning clothes. If this was a practical joke, it wasn’t a very funny one. Artie was tired. She’d already spent almost a decade working as a police officer, and then a detective, so she felt like she had earned her peace. Especially after all the shit she’d been put through, but someone had different plans. And Artie’s life wasn’t quite done yet. In fact, it seemed like in the eyes of the creatures of this world, this was where she was always meant to be. The time she spent getting her ass handed to her in the other dimension? Just a warm up. And now she was expected to just…go along with what everyone else wanted her to do? Including magical beings who were responsible for taking her from one dimension to another. Artie felt like she was in over her head, even if there were several concerned, attractive knights around her. She wasn’t sure if she was going to run away from all the new responsibilities, or embrace them. She wasn’t a rule breaker by nature, but maybe now was the time to change?
CalyB · 121.3K Views

It's Just A Picture (BL)

(MATURE CONTENT) Threesome arc? - Right here A weak, adorable, and low self-esteemed MC with an awful past, a trauma breaking him down every second and controling his life, just before he meets his 'suns', and later gains confidence and starts loving himself again arc? - Right here. Yeah, you read that right. Twin brothers who radiate like the sun and are very possessive of the MC, putting his happiness above everything arc? Gosh, look no further, you're in the right place. This story is just for you, so open it and read to your heart's content. ****** Synopsis I was just a no-name photographer who was trying hard to make a living, but then I got tangled with 'them'. My life, as it was, had always been nothing but a nightmare, living a cursed life that wasn't fit to be called a life. I had no chances with love, connections, or anything. Nothing! And after drawing my last straw, trying to make a final effort that would maybe lead me somewhere other than dirt, I met them again. They - the twins - were my childhood friends whose lives I had ruined with my presence, and I was scared to ruin it a second time, so I tried to stay away from them but... They had other plans. 'When angels dream.' That was what I called the picture. The beautiful portrait was filled with serenity as that blond Italian man gazed into the distance and was showered with the soft petals of cherry blossom. The beautiful picture I had 'stolen'. Yeah, that's the word. I stole it because I didn't ask for permission first. But this is how it unfolded. At first, I took the picture without asking because I was so mesmerized by the scenery, and completely breathtaking, but then I got caught but it wasn't by the same man. They looked alike and wore the same clothes but I could tell right away that he wasn't him. Nevertheless, I apologized. "I'm deeply sorry." I said but then, the man whom I had stolen a picture from walked up behind me and said, "To think such a day would come." I turned around and blinked, looking at the man in front of me and then at the one behind me. They were identical twins. And not only that ... My heart shook... They looked like the twins I had known back then. "What's the matter?" The one in front asked with a bright smile that I was so compelled to take a picture of him and I did. He blinked at my confused expression and then burst out laughing. A sweet and cheerful laugh that made me blush. he looked really handsome. They both did, with their blonde hair which shone like gold with the suns radiation and a charming smile. I found my heart racing at the mere sight of that smile and almost forgot the situation I was in. "I see you haven't changed at all." He suddenly said, swiped my hair back and added, softly, "Hyung." My eyes widened. These two... It couldn't be... They weren't the twins, right? The twins that I knew. They... How did this happen? I just wanted a picture, that's all. ****** Thank you all for diving into this story. Note, the smut doesn't officially start right away till the later chapters but I didn't leave the readers without some sweet candies either, so along the line, there were a bunch of 'actions' between MC and the twins, huhu. His denial knew no bound but his body still won in the end, haha. Anyway, if you find waiting for updates too long, and you haven't checked out my other books, please do. There's also a threesome arc in the first one below. And it's completed too. What a score! 1) Alpha, Alpha, Beta? I transmigrated into an Omegaverse as a boy? [Completed] Check out the continuation of number one, It's the next generation, that is, their kids 2) To Byul (Omegaverse) [Ongoing ]
Byul_Byre · 707.9K Views

The Alpha's Hidden Lover

[Warning: Mature content 18+, BL, Omegaverse] Clyde Aldric would have ascended his throne as the CEO of his family's billion dollars company if it weren't for a Beta falling into his arms begging for a help. Born to a distinguished elite Alpha family as the only surviving male heir, the grave mistake he committed that night with a Beta earned him nothing but a great danger to his own future… However, amidst his hazy vision Clyde found that he wasn't taking any ordinary person to his bed... That golden hair and honey-like eyes…. They sparked the flame of rebellion within his heart! With enemies lurking in the dark trying to prevent him from inheriting the Falcon throne, it wasn't time for him to play around. He should be looking for a powerful Alpha female as a mate, but why couldn't he forget that Beta? His sweet smell, his burning skin, his anger, his dangerous mind... Clyde wanted it all! Now that there’s no going back for everything that happened between them, would he risk his life and everything to keep the fire that continued to burn his passion? *** Ryley was wrong to think that being kind and forgiving would ensure his safety in the modeling world. His sister called him out of the blue, the blond agreed to have a dinner with her thinking it would be a sweet family reunion. But who would have thought that he would find himself waking up in a strange hotel room with all his limbs going numb and someone he didn't know climbing on him! Ryley struggled to escape, and once he managed to get past the door, he unknowingly fell into an Alpha's embrace. All he could remember from that time was how fate pushed them into a bittersweet journey to reveal the truth... He had a secret about his real identity that he had to guard tight especially from Alphas, yet he needed that Alpha to get back at people who hurt him. What should he do? *** Tags: Action, Drama, Revenge, Conspiracy, Mystery, Superpower Get ready to be entangled in the threads of conspiracy, intrigues and betrayals, also a journey of two mortal enemies trying to fight the dire fate that the world forced upon them! *** Join my discord server: https://discord.gg/JU3XsnJzpS *Thank you for reading!*
DrAxy66 · 1.7M Views

A Reaper's Smile : Smile Beyond Redemption

A flourishing kingdom called Valeria was known as the safest kingdom in whole planet of Leria, it was protected by four valiant general. One of the best known general in this kingdom is General Hagris also know as the "Red-eye Devil". He is known as the cruelest and most terrifying general in the kingdom , all his enemies were slaughtered without mercy. His bloody red eyes was enough to terrify one's soul and left you with nightmares your whole life. Unbeknown by others, this same terrifying general has the opposite demenure when he's with his family. His wife, Lady Shinye is a beautiful woman with blonde hair and golden eyes. She's a physician that has a golden heart who helps and cure anyone in need despite their status, weather a noble nor a commoner. She's is deeply loved by the people of Valeria. General Hagris and Lady Shinye have two offspring, their older son Master Shinri and the youngest Little Lady Shizuna. Shinri is an intelligent and brave young man, who is well known in the kingdom of Valeria. It was said that he is a mini version of General Hagris, with same black hair and bloody red eyes. He is full of vigor and called a genius for his age. Shinri is three years older than Shizuna and that is why he is overprotective and loves his little sister dearly. Contrary to his brother who was a mini version of their father, Shizuna is a mixed version of General Hagris and Lady Shinye. Shizuna has black hair heredited from his father and combined bloody golden eyes from her mother and father. She was raised as a carefree child, well protected and deeply loved by her family. Unfortunately, contrary to his brother's label as a genius, Shizuna is labeled as a spoiled brat and trouble maker. The kingdom believes that being pampered by the family made her useless which is ignorant to anything weather it was in fighting, strategising or politics. She is known as a Little ancestor who only do as she wish without thinking of consequences which tarnish the General's reputation and she's well known bully in their circle. But everything changed when a tragedy occurs in General Hagris household. While General Hagris is stationed to protect the kingdom's border and young master Shinri was in the academy, an enemies attack happened on their house that cause Lady Shinye's death and all of the servant of the family. Everyone died except one, the sole survivor of the attack was little Lady Shizuna. She was discovered kneeling in front of Lady Shinye's dead body. She was bathed with blood, reaped clothes , with battered and wounded body. She just kneels without a word, her eyes lifeless until she saw her father , General Hagris did she smile so bright like everything was fine, like no dead body scattered around her, like her mother was not dead at all. General Hagris was stunned , furious and doubtful seeing that smile from Shizuna, thousands of thoughts revolving in his mind. What exactly happened, no one knows. No one knows what happened except Shizuna. And from then on everything have changed. The once loved Lady Shizuna was looked at with contempt by everyone but the bright smile in her lips never fades.. A smile that hides the secret and mystery behind Lady Shinye's massacre.. The Smile of a Reaper.
jadieanna · 6.6K Views

Revolution In Another World

Two girls accidentally instigate revolution in isekai, turning the new world upside down. --- When high schoolers Jean and Leah tragically meet their end in an accident, they wake up not in the afterlife, but in a strange new world ruled by oppressive monarchies, ancient customs, and wildly bizarre creatures. With nothing but their wits, mismatched personalities, and the faint memory of their old lives, the two girls are thrust into the daily grind of a working-class existence. Jean—a reckless, blonde firecracker with a knack for starting trouble—and Leah, her quiet, brainy counterpart, find themselves laboring in increasingly worse circumstances under tyrannical overseers just to make the ends meet. While Leah dreams of stability and survival, Jean can’t help but rally the oppressed people into chants of revolution. Their journey soon takes them to the heart of this world’s inequalities, where their dynamic partnership turns them from clueless outsiders to accidental leaders of a growing rebellion, delivering otherworldly hope to a world that had never dared to envision such things could exist. As they navigate battles of ideals, budding romance, and a revolution that might just topple an empire, Jean and Leah will learn that in this strange, unjust world, the only thing more absurd than the rules is their unlikely falling for each other. Action. Comedy. Romance. And a bit of revolution. Welcome to a world where two unlikely heroines fight for freedom—and maybe, just maybe, find love amidst the chaos.
Toobo · 2.8K Views

My Death List With You!

Could the desire to die be much stronger than the desire to live? Ariana Jatropesh, 27-year-old, daughter of one of the most successful businessmen and owner of the Gold's Foundation Products is one crazy, high-spirited young lady. With a death sentence placed on her neck, Ariana decides to take drastic decisions and step out of the 'perfect' life she had all her life. Jared Antiano is a 29-year-old, Ph.D. holder, about to take over his father's company and live the life he has always dreamed of. But as fate has it, a series of crazy events bring the two young and rich individuals together at the most crucial moments of their lives. They get entangled, drunk on the streets, even messing up a crazy ex's wedding? You name it, they're going to do it all. But the more they spend time together, the more they realize just how much life is precious, contrary to their plan at first. Could this new spark of love be the thread that ties them to live together? Or could it be that which will make them want to die more than ever before? They were about to fall in Love at the Last Sight. The question is...will they live till then? Find out more on this crazily awesome original tale! ---------- "What are you doing?!!" We are going to die!!" Jared screamed with his eyes widened. Ariana flipped her wild blonde hair and gave him a dazzling wink from behind. "And who said that's not what I want?" She snickered. This was the moment he realized he was with one crazy rich brat. #Cover not originally mine, owner should kindly message me if he or she wants it to be taken down
QueenRani6 · 65.8K Views

Saga of Atlantis

"Hah..Hah.." In the midst of what seemed like a battlefield, a young boy with white hair knelt on the ground, struggling to catch shallow breaths. A short sword pierced his heart, his arms and legs were broken, making him unable to stop the crimson blood from coloring the ground. "That's what you get for betrayal," a red-headed teenage boy sneered as he stood before him. "A pathetic person like you could never be my brother," added a purple-haired girl, her voice seething with anger, as she stood alongside the redhead. With great effort, the young boy shifted his gaze forward. He could see many familiar faces in front of him—his so-called family, his so-called friends but his gaze remained fixed on her. "Wh..y, A.nna," he uttered with immense difficulty and sorrow in his voice, his vision blurring as he locked eyes with the blonde-haired girl, who regarded him with emotionless eyes. "I did that so I could save you," he said, his voice gradually growing louder. "I DID THAT SO YOU COULD LIVE!" he shouted, making everyone present flinch in fear. "I never asked you to do this" the blonde-haired girl replied, her words crushing the very soul of the boy. "A...nn.a," the young boy whispered one last time, a small tear slipping down from his eye as he breathed his final breath. ================================ Neil survived eight grueling years in a post-apocalyptic world only to die and be reincarnated in the body of Eden Morton, a character from a game he used to play as a teenager, by an unknown entity for unknown reasons. Eden's life was a pitiable one, plagued by the constant manipulation and betrayal of those around him – whether it was the princess, the famed hero, or even his very own family. Eden died without ever experiencing genuine love. Now, as Neil took over, he was determined to embark on a new journey, seeking the one thing he and Eden never had : a life worth living. ================================ [Discord link :- Invite/5Vgw4JCrBW]
Noob6_writer9 · 1.7M Views

MY DREAM SCHOOL

" Bryan!" Veronica shouted through the crowd, it seemed like the whole school had come outside to see the famous country six (C6) boys. The girls gasped when their eyes landed on the boys, six boys actually running the school, Veronica herself wondered how her friend was coming out from an extra ordinarily expensive car with expensive clothing on. Back in her old town he used to wear normal clothes with them even though he came in an expensive black car that day, he didn't look this way...... He looked glorified in his white shirt and sea blue trousers matching his baby blue irises with white sneakers. His hair was combed to it's normal length covering his forehead and slightly glowed under the sun bringing into view it's golden blonde colour and Veronica's jaws dropped at the sight. She had promised her mom to forget about the feelings she had for her friend, couldn't she be a little selfish to pray to have him as well even after he helping her get into school and all that! She shook her head and focused on getting his attention. Waving her hands and calling his name annoyed him the most, as if a forever he turned to look in her direction and his eyes widened for a while before he frowned at her and all eyes looked at his direction to see who he was looking at. " What the hell! Who is she? She doesn't even fit in here! Yeah haven't seen her before..." One said followed by another and another. They held disgusted expressions on their faces, even Bryan and the only one with an unchanged expression was the white haired guy standing at the left side of Bryan. The girls came at Veronica with a bigger frown, they treated her like shit! Bryan stared down at her without saying anything and it even got worst when he turned around to leave the crowded place behaving like he had never seen her before like he was not the one who brought her there......
Beatrice_Khaylly · 2.4K Views
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