Kuva Liches

【Necromancer】, Originating from ancient Europe, these mysterious wizards were often male, knowing how to summon and enslave the souls of the deceased to create undead creatures. Usually, those who practiced this craft had frail bodies, pale complexions, and twisted psyches, shunning and distrusting others. Some, who mastered the art, could even trade their flesh for an immortal Lich's life. But can someone tell me how to practice the art of necromancy in the 21st century? In a law-abiding society, I can't even get a skeleton! Misumi Mikoto: Doctor Chen, come quickly and help me examine this body; I can't find the cause of death! Jounouchi Hiromi: Doctor Chen, come check on this patient first; what exactly is wrong with him?

Bro! You wouldn’t believe this! Everything was normal. Me and my bros doing some mining for mana gems for that old sockethole, Somanda like we always do all day, everyday. Me, Fractures, Bonet, Mono-socket, Broadbone and the gang. Then from nowhere, that ungrateful sockethole, Somanda tries to END me! Can you believe that?! I mean, I have told some questionable stories about him caressing my skull affectionately and deeming me his prized undead, but no need to axe a skeleton for something like that, right? RIGHT?! I managed to escape through one of the most convenient and contrived get-aways in all of undead history, even managing to pull a bony one on the Lich bastard by stealing two of his seemingly important possessions which I find out later to be better than I thought they’d be! From there it’s a just a SPIRAL of boneshit left and right! I can’t catch a break! What’s with this atrocious luck, bro?! A voice speaks to me about how I have qualified for something about a something that’s supposedly something’s something! Then I find myself in a new world that reeks of life and gives my bones a disgusted rattle. Powerful beasts and men are at every turn, all lining up to be a huge pain in my PELVIS! GAAAAH! Jeez this is happening too fast! However, even while I’m in the thick of this, the one saving grace is that I got something worth while! A new path of power! I can NOT be an undead! I can be something better than both the Living and the Dead! Immune to the antics from both sides. Well... most of them! I’m no longer on the path for Undeath! Only Lifelessness awaits me! I’m the one who transcends reality in this tale! I am... SKULLIUS! And I’m not an UNDEAD! ...... [Author’s Answers To Popular Readers’ Questions] Q: (IHateArjuun77) -Hey author, is your book trash?- A: (Author) -Haha, screw you dear reader. The answer is NO. The story has elements of comedy, action, magic, adventure and Brutality. Like it gets really dark sometimes. There’s a comprehensive story with characters that I tried my damndest to NOT make generic on top of a cool power system that’s for the most part easy to understand. So its not trash. Q: (IFreakingHateArjuun56) -Hey author why is your first volume so slow paced and... trash?- A: (Author) -Haha. It’s how I designed the First Volume to be. It’s a fun setup that doesn’t focus on many things other than the MC’s mentality, powers and route of progression. The next volumes are normal paced, focusing on the world, the villains and general expansion but all while still retaining the book theme and fun experience- Q: (ShadeIsAPervert001) -Hey author, I instinctively sense that I’ll hate this book, when should I drop? A: (Author) -Is this the same reader?! Anyway, I’ll give a range. Read a minimum of the first 20 chapters to a max of up to chapter 44 before you decide on anything too rash. I’ll hunt down this reader! --- Discord: [ https://discord.gg/8hcraTjzE9 ]

The Fourth Prince wants his father to cut Iba Algi some slack. Only ten, almost eleven, she’s no threat to the ruling dynasty of Great Yao. The Third Prince wants everyone to get along, but carries a big sword in case he needs to cut a fool. Baltukhasar used to be the Second Prince. After behaving badly, he started killing bad guys in the Northwest Territory to atone. Crown Princess Esmaralde wants her space. If she doesn’t get it, well, she’s called Goddess of Glaives for a reason. Bon Bao thinks the Fourth Prince is cuter than a demonic red panda. He doesn’t need big swords or heavy glaives on account of so many muscles. Flex. Pin Fun isn’t cuter than a demonic red panda, but he’s cute enough for Iba Algi to save him from a lich. Special Agent Dust has a job to do and does it well. If everyone else were as dedicated to their work, she wouldn’t have a job at all. Screw that. Garrett’s just a nice guy with great abs trying to get by in a changing world. Iba Algi doesn’t think it was very nice for First Qianqiu Emperor to imprison the God of War four thousand years ago. Though only ten, almost eleven, she intends to do something about that.

"What Lengths would you go to have the power to shape your own path? What would you give up? How far would you go?" "I have gone far and given much to get where I am today. Maybe my story would help you to figure it out. Sit, Listen. This is the story of Cytar's First Lich."

Catastrophic Necromancer / National Transfer: Necromancer! I Am A Disaster / Necromancer! I Am the Calamity The game descends upon reality, world rules are overturned, and humanity enters an era of universal career change. Magical beasts run rampant! Secret realms, dungeons, and abysses are countless! Terror and treasures coexist! Danger and opportunity go hand in hand! Only by becoming a career changer, leveling up, and growing stronger can one stand at the pinnacle of the world! On the day of career change, Lin Moyu becomes the sole hidden profession: Necromancer. He obtains a god-level talent, with just level 1 talent enhancing all skills tenfold. He gains a god-level passive skill, transferring all damage to his summons. From now on, as long as his summons don't perish, Lin Moyu won't die. "Endless god-level skeleton warriors!" "Billions of lich mages!" "Countless undead bone dragons!" "Can you withstand it?" Under the curse, even gods turn to bones. Corpses explode, the sky falls and the earth shatters, the world collapses. "I sit high upon the throne of bones, walking between life and death." "I am the calamity!"

One-thousand years after being killed, Leander, the Hero of Peace is brought back from death by the Lich Queen of the Undead Kingdom, tasked with defeating the Demon King and the Goddess and settling a war that has raged for the last thousand years.

So who knows what love actually is and who knows who can become lovers? Anabel and Allistar have known each other for millennia. They began as humans. She became a spirit mage and Alchemist and he became a Lich mage and weather warlock. But what becomes of love when ambition is involved? Can you forgive the father of your child when he uses said child to obtain an ultimate goal? Do you protect your children or love your soulmate? And is change truly possible when ambition is involved? A love story is about trial and tribulation, mistakes and successes. Both Anabel and Allistar want happiness for the other. They want their children to be safe, happy, and successful. How would you balance love with responsibility?

The game has come to reality, the rules of the world have been subverted, and mankind has entered the era of national career change. Monsters are rampant! There are countless secret realms, dungeons, and abyss! Horror and treasure coexist! Danger and opportunity coexisted! Only by becoming a job changer! Leveling up and becoming stronger! Only then could one stand at the top of the world! On the day of the job change, Lin Moyu became the only hidden profession, Necromancer. Get god-level talents, and Just a Level 1 talent increased all his skills by 10 times. Obtain a god-level passive skill and transfer all damage to the summoned creature. From then on, as long as his summoned creatures did not die, Lin Moyu would not die. "Endless skeleton warriors!" "Billions of Lich Mage!" "Countless undead bone dragons!" "Can you handle it?" Under the curse, the gods turned into bones. Corpses burst, the sky fell, and the world collapsed. "I sit on the Divine Throne of Skeletons, walking between life and death." "I am the catastrophe!"

With just three sentences, you convinced the Paladin to spend five thousand Gold Coins for you. You truly are a master of the Undead who thoroughly understands human nature! … "Respected Master Amberser, after our review by the editors at 'Legendary Spells' Publishing, we regret to inform you that your paper 'Research on the Non-Humanoid Form Modification of Undead Creatures' is unsuitable for publication in our monthly magazine. We suggest that you submit your work to a magical academic journal with less stringent review requirements." A burst of ghostly blue flame erupted from the tips of fingers, reducing the rejection letter. "Damn it! You bastards are purely discriminating against liches, discriminating against undead magic!!!" "Drop dead!"

The story is set in a fantastical world and follows the protagonist, Ambrose, who is reincarnated as a lich and embarks on a series of adventures to solve his financial problems. Ambrose was once a legendary mage, but when the elves dramatically raised the price of the Potion of Youth, he chose to seek immortality through lichdom. However, his new existence as a lich proves far less carefree than expected. Maintaining his survival and researching necromancy plunge him into severe economic hardship. To cope, Ambrose uses his legendary abilities to craft multiple phylacteries, which significantly enhance his survivability but also drain his wealth. In the novel, Ambrose starts marketing his innovative skeletal creations. These low-cost yet highly effective constructs catch the attention of legendary undead. However, many of his clients do not request skeletons but instead assign him increasingly dangerous tasks, drawing him into greater trouble and peril. Through these challenges, Ambrose garners the interest of various powerful factions—some seeking to ally with him, others aiming to eliminate him. To secure his survival and amass wealth, he is compelled to participate in major events, gaining even greater power and fortune along the way. The novel is characterized by its logical consistency and intelligent characters. While the plot unfolds at a slower pace, each scenario is packed with tension and excitement, delivering a captivating narrative.

A young man from the Miaowei Tribe brought up by his strict father, suddenly turned into Rank 1 Wizard on the day he was orphaned. He then obtained the ability to control giant worms. Soon after, he found his mother who was in a faraway foreign land by accident. From a small mountain village, he managed to jump into the amazing arena that was a global metropolis. Thus far, we have a young man who inherited the legacy of mastering ancient demons from an ancient country. From Western civilization to other worlds, a fascinating saga is born.

Jay is a modern day college student who one day is running late for class ,but is stopped by an old man who introduces himself as mark and asks him if he wants to reborn in another world with a system he accepts and is transported to another world named Planet Tian. He gets reborn sadly as a Lich instead of of his wish as a Human. Read to find out Jay's crazy adventure as he finds his path to becoming a God Necromancer as lich .

A villain rises from the ashes of a miracle. Lieze Sokalar is the daughter of the world's most fearsome warlord--a Lich hellbent on bringing the world to its knees using his undead armies. Despite her heritage, however, Lieze struggles with even the most basic aspects of corpse-raising, making her the laughingstock of the Order of Necromancers. Tormented by her ineptitude, Lieze can only rely on wisdom to ensure her survival as she accompanies her father on a crusade to dominate the holdings of mankind. However, a series of events are about to unfold that will forever change the trajectory of her life, and inadvertently grant her the chance she's always been waiting for. Manipulation, skulduggery, and necromancy; betrayals, dark secrets, and overwhelming odds--these are the trials which await our intrepid villainess on her dark ascension towards the heights of absolute power. What to expect: - An unapologetically villainous protagonist who makes use of strategy and wit just as often as she does the system. - A system that starts off weak, but eventually becomes more powerful. - A slow rise to power against seemingly impossible odds. - Antagonists with noble ideals and realistic flaws. What not to expect: - A villain protagonist who makes decisions purely for the sake of being evil. - A physically powerful protagonist.

Mizuki, una joven que ha experimentado todo tipo de adversidades, pierde la vida tras sacrificarse para salvar a una niña de unos delincuentes. Sin embargo, su historia no termina ahí: reencarna en un nuevo mundo, dotada de un vasto conocimiento. Pero lo inesperado ocurre cuando, al despertar, se encuentra en el territorio del poderoso Rey Lich... ¡y, accidentalmente, conquista el corazón de su hija! Ahora, junto a su "mejor amiga", Mizuki busca llevar una vida tranquila, alejada de la trama principal del mundo: la misión de derrotar al Rey Demonio. Pero, ¿será suficiente intentar evitar el conflicto o el destino la obligará a enfrentarlo?

1. Disclaimer: Zero to the strongest villain(setting) 2. Disclaimer: This is not the story where the main character gets Transmits into a novel (he is a villain cause of his action, so there are no hero or main female lead characters like other villain novels. so keep that in mind before you start.) 3. Disclaimer: no harem, there is a single female lead. .............................. After the death of Edwin Bald, one of the greatest villains in Eldora (a world of magic and fantasy creatures) the faceless god gave him an unexpected chance. Even though Edwin was a lich who had broken many laws of nature and committed countless sins, the god offered to make him human again, but not in Eldora. This time, he would be reborn on modern Earth. Additionally, Edwin could choose any blessings (trait/ talent) from the list to help him in his new life. Unexpected to him, Edwin Bald woke up in the body of Asuka Volford, a fatty, trash, molester, who was even cuckolded by his girlfriend, making him commit suicide. Also born to a noble family. The story follows Edwin, and how he step by step become strong, creating his own legend, and ultimately becoming the leader of Earth's biggest criminal syndicate which aims to conquer the entire world, from mere third-rate villain despised by the whole world

The game has come to reality, the rules of the world have been subverted, and mankind has entered the era of national career change. Monsters are rampant! There are countless secret realms, dungeons, and abyss! Horror and treasure coexist! Danger and opportunity coexisted! Only by becoming a job changer! Leveling up and becoming stronger! Only then could one stand at the top of the world! On the day of the job change, Lin Moyu became the only hidden profession, Necromancer. Get god-level talents, and Just a Level 1 talent increased all his skills by 10 times. Obtain a god-level passive skill and transfer all damage to the summoned creature. From then on, as long as his summoned creatures did not die, Lin Moyu would not die. "Endless god-level skeleton warriors!" "Billions of Lich Mage!" "Countless undead bone dragons!" "Can you handle it?" Under the curse, the gods turned into bones. Corpses burst, the sky fell, and the world collapsed. "I sit on the Divine Throne of Skeletons, walking between life and death." "I am the catastrophe!"

Charles was a bright medical student, but his classmates often teased him about his premature balding. "Bald at 20, just like that Charles from X-MEN," they'd jeer. He endured their taunts, focusing on his dream of becoming a doctor. This aspiration stemmed from the tragic loss of his parents; he was determined to make a difference and save lives. But one day, during a lecture, a gunman stormed into the classroom, unleashing chaos. Charles's world went black. He awoke to find himself reborn—not as a human, but as a small dragon bone tucked away in a shadowy cave. This was no ordinary world; it was a realm where magic thrived and mythical beasts roamed. There was no grand destiny awaiting him, no innate talent for taming legendary creatures. He was just a bone. But Charles was not one to give up. He yearned to grow stronger, to explore this fantastical world. Through sheer determination, he gradually formed a skeletal body, becoming a low-level skeleton. He set his sights on mastering magic, with the ultimate goal of becoming a Lich. Yet, even in this extraordinary existence, one mundane insecurity lingered: "I'm bald in this world too..."

Creation. Destruction. Life. And Death. Long ago, these four beings existed in harmony...but then ' he ' came. The end of creation. The Lord of destruction. The son of anti life. The death of Death itself. In a zombie apocalypse, one human is chosen as the new vessel of a being older than the world itself. Whilst the world wonders of the horrors around it, it is unaware of the most dangerous threat to ever walk the Earth. Lesley Woodsman, a human survivor in a post apocalypse has to find a way to save the human race from zombies, monsters and... things to horrific to mention. " If he fails...' he'll ' kill, everyone."

An African man who would do anything not to die makes a deal with a soul reaper he is then sent to another world that recently had a zombie outbreak , he starts his journey as a zombie and his end of the deal is to make sure all the humans on that planet become zombies or die.

800 years ago Earth started to undergo changes as Mana began to awaken and spread on Earth. First animals started to mutate becoming stronger and powerful, next the Earth began to grow in size causing earthquakes, tsunamis and other disasters too take place all around the world. The Gods taking pity upon the human race lent them aid by giving them the ability to awaken classes, level up and learn skills but the Human race celebrated far too early. As the Earth completely advanced and fused into the next dimension, the Human race now in a new World had to fight other more powerful Races, Monsters and conquer dungeons to survive. But soon all intelligent races faced a new Disasters as Hell invaded with their demonic Beasts, Demons and Devils. But that was only the start as an even more terrifying threat soon appeared The Abyss.... -------- In the Year 836 after the fusion a young man Awakens in the body of a 10 year old with the same name and the original owners memories after his untimely death. Finding himself in this new world with infinite possibilities he works his hardest to become the strongest. Working hard for 6 years in order to increase his chances of awakening a powerful combat class he is shocked too discover he has awakened the Class Death Apprentice a low level almost completely useless class with not much potential. However that's when his luck kicks in as he gets his Golden finger a strange Grimoire, and his class changed into the very first Human Necromancer. Follow him on his journey to the top as he goes from summoning a weak skeleton to leading huge undead armies, summoning huge undead dragons, behemoths, great Lich's and other undescribable things of undeath along with Curses, Dark Magic, Soul Magic and other Magic of untold power..... ------

Klein is a young paladin of the Blind Lord, a thirty-second level adventurer. Together with his band of adventurers, this young man wishes to destroy the monsters that threaten the civilians, to become stronger, to level up, to gain fame and honor! But will he succeed, if danger can lurk around any corner, and death and life in this world is determined only by the value that fell on a twenty-sided die, which throws the blind god of luck? Especially when they accidentally crossed the path of a powerful Lich trying to become a god. I'l publish this work on Royal Road

This story is dropped for the foreseeable future.

A Vampire Princess had encountered something in the past, making her immune to the sun, the only Vampire to have achieved this. But for mysterious reasons, the Elder Lich, their vampire family was subservient towards learned of her mysterious nature, hatching a plan as it made the Elders of the vampire family betrothed the Vampire Princess to the Werewolf King, their sworn enemy that had slain countless younger vampires. And worst of all, the Elder Lich implanted its life vessel as his artificial heart, tying him down to its evil, mysterious schemes. It also created a fake bond between the Vampire Princess and the Werewolf King. "Our bond is the will of the heavens." Maximus whispered as he draped Lenora over his shoulder, running with her in tow, "And, our love is the underlying proof of that." The couple was under an illusion of love thanks to Lich's machinations. But, what would happen when it is revealed? Will their fake bond trump the tests of fate? Or will it be severed under the relentless pursuit of truth? Only the Lich knew, and so will you, once you finish this novel. ---------- Author's Notes: The characters used to make the cover doesn't belong to me. I got this edited by someone the way it looks now. other Works: 1. EMPRESS OF BUSINESS WORLD [Completed] 2. MY NEW LOVER IS A PRESIDENT. [Completed] 3. CEO DADDY, LET'S GET MOMMY [Ongoing] 4. TEMPTING MY RENTED BOYFRIEND [Completed] 5. HER TRUE SOULMATE. [Completed] 6. MOON LOVERS: CRAVING FOR MY FAKE VAMPIRE MATE [Ongoing] 7. VAMPIRE KING'S WEREWOLF BRIDE [Ongoing] 8. Mafia King's Seduction Lessons [Ongoing] 9. CHANGING SEASONS (AVAILABLE IN AMAZON) Do give a read for my other books. Thank you

After the ‘100-Year War’ between the Necromancers and Priests, an all-time genius who’ll shake the power structure was born. “Am I a rare case or something? Do I have talent?” A potential beyond all imagination. He obtained his father’s undead army and entered the great Necromancer school of Kizen that divided the continent. Geniuses are geniuses, even when gathered among the elites. The research community was flipped on its head by the appearance of a new case. Professors wouldn’t leave him be alone, wanting to make him study directly under them. Officials from all over the kingdom and heads of organizations fidgeted over whether to scout him. “Professor! When can I make a Lich?” “Gimme a break. How talented are you? You’re crossing the line, honestly.” A genius among geniuses had appeared. (Please keep in mind that I am only uploading this is because no one else is. All credits goes to Reaper scans)

In a twist of fate, Yann, once a fearsome Lich King in a previous life, finds himself reincarnated as a tentacle monster in his current one. But what happens when a delectable little girl crosses paths with this unlikely creature? "Others may traverse realms to become heroes, but I traverse to become a tentacle monster," Yann jests. "While others wield cheat codes, I become the cheat code for others. And while others command legions of magical beasts, I become the pet of another, albeit fortunately, the pet of a lovely young maiden. And you there, dare to harm my little maiden? You won't escape my grasp after school! I'll make sure of it!" "My dream is to use my tentacles to ensure a blissful life for my little maiden at home! Anyone who dares obstruct me from building our crystal palace will face my wrath!" With such determined words, Yann sets out on a whimsical yet ambitious quest, using his unusual abilities to protect and provide for his newfound charge, all while dreaming of a brighter future in their crystal abode.

Reminder: This novel is set in the Philippines and it is my original novel. ---------- When he was eleven years old, he went missing and never been found again. He woke up in a locked room without sunlight because there's no windows around. He could see through the door's peephole. He thought he was kidnapped for the ransom money and felt confident that his family will rescue him anytime. However, when he was forcefully pulled out of his locked room and went to a weird laboratory room, his life change. He started showing symptoms he doesn't know the cause of it. The only thing made him certain was that his body is changing. His strength increased ten fold than human strength, including his endurance and agility. Also, he started having abilities that no normal person have. His eyes gained a microscopic eye vision. His memories gained photographic memory he never have before. He didn't understand what's happening until the zombie apocalypse happened. Now, he understands. He became a zombie but he's a unique zombie. He's not a mutated zombie nor normal zombie. It seems like he's a zombie but, at the same time, also a human. Now, he's finding out what benefits will bring him. After all, he doesn't want to be a man-eating monster. Note: The photo is not mine. Please credit it to the owner. ------- Other Novel My Heart Belongs To The Lich [NEW]

As the game descends into reality, the world's rules are overturned, and humanity enters the era of universal job-changing. Monsters rampage! Numerous secret realms, dungeons, and abysses abound! Terror and treasure coexist! Danger and opportunity walk hand in hand! Only by becoming a job-changer, leveling up and growing stronger, can one stand at the pinnacle of the world! On the day of the job change, Lin became the sole possessor of a unique hidden job, the Necromancer. He acquired a divine talent, which at just level 1, enhances all skills by tenfold. He obtained a divine passive skill, transferring all damage to his summoned creatures. As long as his summons are indestructible, Lin will not die. "Endless divine skeleton warriors!" "Billions of lich mages!" "Countless undead bone dragons!" "Can you withstand them?" Curses powerful enough to gods turn into white bones. Corpses explosions, so powerful, they dent the sky, and the world collapses. "I sit high on the throne of bones, walking between life and death." "I am the catastrophe!"

[The Undoer: Supervillain Lich from Cape Society to a Fantasy World Unlike Anything!] For 2000 Years, I have fought this world’s champions… And for 2000 years, I had seen myself change… Finally, for 2000 years, I learned of defeat… The Undoer was a Psychic-based villain who had existed since the dawn of superpowers. He was the strongest psychic to ever exist with a mind so powerful he could not die. Time would rewound itself if he so-willed. Even old age could not get him. When his body decayed, his mind would remain, imbued to what was left of his skeleton— proving his ghost to be eternal. Only after 2000 years had the Heroes of Humanity been able to defeat him— though they were not able to kill him, they were able to exile him somewhere as far away as possible from Earth. “Yes, I have tasted defeat. But it is fine. This was only a temporary setback… My plans have not changed. Oh, my lovely daughter… No matter how long it would take, I shall resurrect you!” ~~~ GMT+8; scheduled upload is every 7:00 AM Monday to Saturday. ~~~ [Character Profile— Name: Ivan Montano Alias: The Undoer Type: Psychic Motivation: Resurrect his daughter, and pursue a happy life. Threat Level: Continental. Appearance: White skeleton exuding purple aura, and wears a dark robe. Recorded Feats: destroyed multiple countries, created undead via telepathy, mind controlled an entire city and possibly a country (latter was unconfirmed), melted a brain from extreme distance, —omitted hundred several feats recorded over the past two millennia (see more). Defeated: Year 4027, December 13. The Heroes of Humanity employed the Exile Strategy to finally get rid of The Undoer once and for all. Two centuries ago, a clairvoyant by the name of Sarah Mendez had learned of the unique telepathic variant ability of The Undoer to turn back time. More studies were conducted on how to deal with The Undoer. It had been deemed that the superpowers needed for the strategy were mainly hypnotic sleep, teleportation, telepathy, and specific mind-resilient abilities. Over 800 psychics from three generations had been gathered for the operation. Cutting-edge technology was also employed for the operation: power nullifiers, mind dampeners, electro-static shields, nth barriers, warp enhancers, psychic multipliers, and micro-healing. Along with 800 psychics and the Nine Pillars of Humanity, The Undoer had been subdued for a short second— using the teleporter-class psychics as axis and with the support of the provided technology, the operation to exile The Undoer had succeeded. To where? No one knew. Casualty report: Five of the Nine Pillars of Humanity, 728 Psychics, and over 81,622 civilians.]

Kingdoms and empires collide in the Royale Arena, sending their finest warriors to settle political disputes. Guild established for the purpose of roaming far and wide in search of mythical creatures, akin to those found in "Monster Hunters." Humans and dwarves engage in fierce competitions over limited edition cards in their own rendition of "Hearthstone" Even nobles immerse themselves in the intricacies of governance, studying "Frostpunk" to manage their realms. In the end, sorcerers and shamans come together to establish Hogwarts, the School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. This is the tale of cultural conquest in a parallel fantasy world, where Earth's influences shape the fabric of another realm.

Skeletons filled the warehouse with tomatoes and potatoes, death knights milked cows, vampires gnawed on watermelons, succubi were busy in the kitchen, and the Lich King was quietly licking ice cream...