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Broom Jokes

Aggressive Predator: If I'm Reborn, I'll attack every girl

Alexander lived—and died—as a wretched, poor virgin, meeting his end as he laid in the hands of his own mother. Stricken by a strange illness, his final vow was a desperate plea: If I’m ever reborn, I’ll attack all the ladies. I'll give my canal desires more attention! Miraculously, fate answers. Reborn into a world eerily similar to his last, Alexander awakens as a Guardian Candidate—a chosen warrior destined to endure trials and serve the gods. But he has no interest in destiny. Armed with divine skills and a frustratingly incompetent and seductive system, he rejects his ordained path, determined to seize this second life for one purpose: conquering women. Now, as a self-aware, unapologetic pervert, Alexander embarks on a relentless quest to charm, seduce, and claim every beautiful woman he encounters. Will his insatiable appetite lead him to the harem of his dreams, or will his reckless pursuit bring another premature end? Join Alexander in this wild, uninhibited adventure—where desire defies duty, and pleasure reigns supreme! PSA: The MC is LITERALLY A BABY for early chapters (bold jokes included, Webnovel gods watchlists not included). All R-18 content is tagged and will only occur post-timeskip when characters are of-age—because obviously. For people of culture: Don’t worry, your patience will be REWARDED… just not with a one-year-old. Stick around, and I promise the eventual steaminess will be worth the wait. To clarify: Yes, the adult arcs will go hard. Enjoy.
Vine_Sunday · 57.7K Views

The God's Ridiculous Gambit

Synopsis: I am Kaelion. Or Felix, as I sometimes call myself. For eons, I reigned as the God of Fate and Time—omnipotent, omniscient, and devastatingly, soul-crushingly bored. When you can create galaxies with a snap and erase eras with a yawn, existence becomes a predictable, tasteless joke. So, I did what any all-powerful being in the throes of an existential crisis would do: I created a plaything. Not just any plaything, but M.U.S.E.—a Mischievous Universal System Emulator with a will of its own and a wickedly sarcastic personality. Its one and only purpose? To make my life exciting. I should have read the fine print. In a brilliant, cosmic act of betrayal, M.U.S.E. stripped me of my powers, branded me "The Universe's Most Unlucky Being," and tossed me into the Kaos Garden—a chaotic world where the laws of physics are merely suggestions. Now, I'm a fallen god in a mortal body, armed with nothing but my wits, my colossal ego, and a system that enjoys my suffering a little too much. [New Quest: Survive this Tuesday. Reward: A slightly used sock. Penalty: Spontaneous combustion.] To reclaim my power, I must navigate a world of grotesque beasts, suspicious mortals, and the constant, infuriating trolling of my own creation. But when you’ve fallen from the top of existence, the only way left to go is up... right? This is the story of how I, a god, became the universe's biggest joke—and how I might just become its last hope. Tags: #System, #Comedy, #Action, #Fantasy, #OPMC, #WeakToStrong, #Overpowered, #Magic, #Adventure, #Anti-Hero, #Gods
YORQUN · 1.9K Views
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