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Bobs Burgers Booboo

Rizzmaster: The Adventures of Bob

SYNOPSIS | Initially an ‘Average Joe’, or thoroughly mediocre person, Bob, born with F- grade genetic potential had an epiphany that day when he read in his science textbook that "The goal of all living things was to reproduce". Stumbling upon Epigenetics, a Theory which states that every organism can alter its genetic potential as a result of their own actions and in the right environmental conditions, Bob begins to study and train in order to improve his Genetic Quality, in order to become a genetic success and attain Immortality. One day he picks up a manual entitled “The Art of Rizz, Vol. 1” dropped by a grandfather who is seeking a disciple to pass on his teachings, and so begins Bob’s Adventures as he embarks on the path of becoming a Grand Rizzmaster, and achieving Immortality with endless achievements, the most important one being to achieve Evolutionary success and to ensure his DNA is passed on successfully. Read and follow along with the Adventures of Bob in this unique ‘Coming’-of-age Tale and get ready for a ‘Wild Ride’. And no! Not… necessarily the one you’re now thinking of now… ! (Get that mind out of the gutter :P!!!) Rating: PG Parental Guidance recommended ___ • Any and all terms and ‘epiphanies’ in this work are intended as satire for comedic effect and should not be taken seriously. • All characters, places and events are fictional unless otherwise stated. • The aim is to Entertain. Enjoy ! ✨ • Read and you won't regret* *Disclaimer: 50% probability.
nightskynear · 99.3K Views

THE SYSTEM THAT COULDN'T EVEN

The System That Couldn’t Even A Novel So Dumb, It Might Accidentally End the World. Maybe. Eventually. Kinda. Probably Not. Meet Dave. He’s not a chosen one. He’s not a hero. He’s not even emotionally stable. He’s just some guy who tripped into a dumpster and got forcibly paired with a world-ending system that’s in beta, crashes more than Windows ME, and was possibly programmed by a drunk raccoon named Bob. Now he’s the World-Ender Deluxe™ Beta (regrettably active)... ...except the only thing he’s ended is his last relationship and several kebabs of questionable hygiene. The System Says: "DESTROY THE WORLD!" Dave: "Cool. Can I at least finish my sandwich first?" Here’s What Dave Can’t Do: Swing a sword Cast a spell Walk in a straight line without falling Remember where he left his pants Here’s What He Can Do: Trip over air Summon pigeons with god complexes Accidentally start a park-wide flood with a $2 entropy grenade Break the space-time continuum using a fork, a pigeon, and a quinoa salad (don’t ask) Apocalypse Progress: 0.0000000051% (Achieved entirely by mistake. And glitter. There was a lot of glitter.) If you’re here for: 1000 chapters of OP MC face-slapping young masters 18 dragon wives with tragic backstories and zero personalities Systems that whisper sweet cheat codes into your ear like sultry GPS GET OUT. This is: A system that judges your fashion sense An MC whose charisma stat is legally negative A support item called “ACME Brand Pebble of Distraction” What’s it like? Imagine if Deadpool, Rick Sanchez, and that one feral raccoon in your alley got high and tried to write a system novel while arguing with Clippy. Now imagine the protagonist is allergic to competence. That’s Dave. We roast: Webnovel: For greenlighting 12 identical CEO dragon rebirth system novels daily Wattpad: For thinking “Girl meets boy with six abs and a tragic past” is still fresh Light novels: For those 37-word titles that give away the entire plot (and your will to live) Royal Road: For 10,000-word chapters about crafting soap in 17 different skill trees You: For still reading this, you chaotic little gremlin. Respect. Warning: Side effects may include: Spontaneous nose-snorting Existential giggles Increased pigeon awareness Mild confusion followed by deep appreciation for entropy Final Tagline: The fate of the world rests in the hands of a man who thinks “nuclear option” refers to microwaving a burrito for 20 minutes. So if you're looking for deep power systems, sexy sword lords, and emotionally scarred ice queens with D-cups and daddy issues? Swipe left. But if you want a cosmic clown show featuring radioactive birds, failing systems, and the most underqualified apocalypse agent in literary history? Welcome. Dave’s been waiting for you. He just didn’t know it. Because he forgot where he put his phone.
1617_Ranjit_singh · 2.2K Views

NAILS OUT

Once a calm way of life, filled with a beautiful love story and legit wealth, along the way twists into more action packed, still with deep love affection through, which takes place in different countries and cities around the globe. 'Ishtar' is an omega FL from a very humble/poor beginning who, at the age of 13 finds herself being raised by a wealthy family after her mother who works for the same family as a house maid encounters a terrible accident which leaves her in a home for the disabled. When Ishtar grows up, continous life challenges throw her out of her marriage with a new born baby, all the way to finding herself turn into a very dangerous but kind assassin _ a contact killer after she's left with amnesia and she couldn't remember how she got hurt. 'Bob Lee' is an alpha ML, the only child in this very wealthy family, who grows up into a very handsome young man, ladies' man, knowing nothing but a silver spoon in his mouth since childhood. Bob Lee, as the heir of his father's sweat, extravagantly wastes his family's fortune after discarding the only smart and wise woman, and here he finds himself with only one option to get himself back on his feet; to join dirty businesses. Nadia Brownie, a villain from the middle class, and a very beautiful eye catching young lady is a snake in her body, very ready _ so manupilative and capable of doing whatever it takes to make false appear like reality. With this character, Nadia Browne love bombs Bob Lee, switching his mind blind to the extent where he abandons his sweet marriage and marry her instead. Nadia Browne becomes more dangerous along the way after winning her way fully into Bob Lee's world. However, Nadia Browne is so lucky to have a best friend named Sonia. She is very ambitious when it comes to working, very easy with people, and a type of friend who will always challenge her with nothing but the truth whether Nadia likes it or not.
TheHeroLive · 51K Views

The Secret bob

29 Mason sat in a cafe with Maria and Anthony, his case covered with bruises from getting beat by Jacob To be honest, he might have acted all mighty but then it felt so unfair that he just had to lose to a loser like Jacob It made him feel so miserable "What in the world happened to your face?" Maria gasped while checking it out "Were you beaten badly? By who ?" "Forget it" He waved her off and took a sip from his iced Americano which they had all ordered a cup each when they got to the cafe. His gaze diverted to Anthony and he arched his brow curiously "Who the fuck is he?" "I could just ask the same about you? Who the fuck are you and why would my sister bring me to a shabby guy like you" Anthony also had no chills He is definitely not the type to get bullied Especially not by a stranger "So you are the brother" Mason nodded after getting the issue "Nice to meet you, I am Mason Grey Hennessy" Anthony scoffed in disbelief and turned to Maria with a glare "What?" Maria shrugged "Seriously? You brought me here just to meet Jacob's brother? Have you not learnt from what happened to us the other day?" He sounded upset "Just calm down and listen" Maria tried to cool him off "Let me correct this" Mason took another sip from his iced Americano "I am Jacob's step brother, not his brother" "So what? As long as there is brother in your relationship then I would actually be grateful if you can stay away from me and my sister" "My point is....." Mason sighed frustratingly Having this feeling that Anthony would be a difficult one did not make him feel that good "Your point is what?" Anthony inquired "He is my enemy, just like he is your enemy too" Mason explained Anthony threw his head back in surprise and looked at Maria who gave him a nod and a soft chuckle "He is your enemy? Why? You don't like your brother? Does that mean you are a villain?" Mason suddenly felt uncomfortable "Don't act like you are all saint" Mason frowned "He was your brother-in-law and you never liked him either. Does that not make you a villain too?" "Can you guys just get along? Stop making this hard for me" Maria covered her face with her palm "How about you just explain the whole situation to your brother? He is starting to get on my nerves" Mason leaned his back on the chair and continue sipping his iced Americano "Anthony" Maria called "Mason needs our help" "And why do you think I should help a guy like him? He is rude and immature" "Just let that go. The one who gave him all this bruises is Jacob" "And so what? They are siblings who are meant to fight all day" "Let me just get straight to the point" Maria was also starting to get frustrated Why did she not think about how annoying Anthony can be sometimes "Grey Hennessy is planning to give Jacob all his inheritance when he dies" "What?" Anthony arched his brow "Why would he do that? I am pretty sure he has three sons including Jacob so why would Jacob be the only one receiving the inheritance?" "I know right? Don't you just feel bad for me and my brother?" Mason leaned forward, at ease that Anthony was slowly getting on the same page with them "I understand that you guys are his illegitimate son but still, that is not so good" Anthony sighed while Mason's eyes darkened Illegitimate? One of the words he hate most in this world One of the thing that has made him always lose to Jacob all his life It is just the fact that he is an illegitimate son . "You seems to know a lot about our family" the corner of his lips moved up "After Jacob's identity got revealed, I read a lot of magazines about you guys and I also watched the news" Anthony seems proud of himself "Anyways, what are you going to do now that your Father plans to give his whole to Jacob?" "We just have to make sure he does not" Maria replied "And how are we going to do that?" "Coming up with a plan" Mason was the one to reply this time "What plan?" Anthony asked "For now, we just have to make Jacob unreliab
Authoress_Vibes · 27.6K Views

DR BOB

A POWERFUL SPELL TO HELP YOU GET YOUR EX LOVER BACK NO MATTER HOW LONG YOU BROKE UP OR WHOM HE/SHE MAY BE WITH NOW DR BOB WILL HELP YOU GET THEM BACK CONTACT DR. BOB VIA WHATSAPP : ( +2349153314547 ) EMAIL: drbobsupernaturalspelltemple@gmail.com Hello am STEPHANIE JANE from the united state, i read some testimony about Dr  Bob   on how he has helped people in bringing back there ex within 48hours i was just thinking if that was real, And decided to call a lady who made a testimony and also dropped her number, So i called her and ask her about Dr  Bob   she said Dr  Bob   is a trustworthy man and he his ready to bring back my lover for me, i was just so happy and a little bit relief that my lover will be back to me soon, Then i decided in contacting Dr  Bob   which i did, And before i could share him my problem he has already told me what i came for, And he said everything will be okay within 48hours that my lover will be back to my arms, So he said he would be casting the spell and that within 48hours my lover would call me, So i hoped so truly before the 48hours i got a call from a man who has left me for the past 1years saying he is sorry and he wants me back, i was happy and i said i also want him back, Then i traveled to Canada to meet him up,  And he apologized for what he has done to me now he proposed to marry me and we are both preparing for our wedding soon, All thanks to the great and World best spell caster, Dr Bob His private mail :  drbobsupernaturalspelltemple@gmail.com WhatsApp him directly :+2349153314547 https://www.facebook.com/drbobsupernaturalspelltemple/ 
Stephanie_Jane_3783 · 6.8K Views

capture ih

Ishida Riku was your quintessential high school student -easygoing, a little shy, but always up for a good time. As he celebrated his friend's birthday, laughter echoed through the party, colorful balloons bobbing in rhythm with their joyous shouts. However, the night took a wild turn when a few too many drinks struck him, sending him teetering between euphoric highs and dizzying lows. As he stumbled out of the party into the cool night air, Riku was blissfully unaware that destiny was about to turn his life upside down. With a classic, comically tragic twist of fate, our beloved Truck-kun came barreling down the street, and just like that, Riku vanished into the ether, whisked away to a land far beyond his imagination. Suddenly, he found himself reincarnated as Ray Aldihard, a character known only as a minor villain in the beloved video game 'Capture Target.This game, rife with twists, turns, and alluring characters, had pit the fateful hero against Ray, who was notoriously infamous for his cunning ways and dubious schemes. But now, with Riku's spirited presence occupying Ray's body, everything was about to change. Armed with knowledge of the game's mechanics and plot, he was determined to forge his own path-one that would not only defy the confines of villainy but also turn the tables on the unsuspecting protagonists. Join Riku as he transforms from an ordinary boy into an extraordinary figure embroiled in romance and rivalry. His escapades might just draw you in, making you wonder whether a villain can truly become a hero-or if there's still more mischief left to stir. Please support Riku with your power stones and offer your thoughts in the comments; your guidance is appreciated as he ventures deeper into this sensual saga! Warning: This is a r18 novel. MC will steal other people's women while he himself will be safe from green hat. thank you.
Divine_Art_5848 · 42.2K Views

Crazy Blood Demon

My new villain novel: Demonic Skeleton God Just a warning the first few chapters may be worse because I wrote them when I couldn't write well but in my opinion 18+ chapters will be much better than the previous ones, please give it a chance. I was pretty inspired by ORV to begin with, so if that bothers you you can leave. Because I've been annoyed by people who've read 5 chapters and say it's a copy. The first 7 chapters it's going to be very similar to 40 chapters it's going to be a little bit similar and then not at all. Bob Reloud was a strange kid—psychopathic, autistic, and introverted. On the surface, he didn't fit the typical image of a psychopath, but when he got angry, he became something else entirely: a bloodthirsty predator, driven purely by instinct. The first sign of his violent nature emerged in kindergarten when he was just five. A classmate destroyed his favourite toy car, a cherished gift from his grandfather. Enraged, Bob's face turned red, and foam gathered at the corners of his mouth. In a fit of uncontrollable fury, he gouged the boy's eye, causing severe injuries that left the child hospitalized for a week. His parents, horrified, took him to a psychiatrist who reviewed footage of the incident. But when the psychiatrist met Bob, he found a calm, seemingly ordinary autistic boy. After weekly sessions revealed nothing abnormal beyond his autism, the psychiatrist concluded that it was an isolated incident—a strange, unexplainable outburst. However, Bob's parents remained cautious, assigning him a special tutor and treating him with apprehension, afraid to provoke another violent episode. One evening, his father came home drunk, as he often did, and began his habit of throwing insults at Bob's mother. Bob had grown accustomed to these rants. Afterward, his father sat down to watch football. Bob, fiddling with a stolen phone, accidentally blasted music at full volume. Bob’s dad started beating him, and his mom tried to calm him down, but it was too late. Bob became extremely angry, went into his psycho mode, and murdered his parents. Officer Danzel responded to the call. Breaking down the door, he was met with a chilling scene: a boy covered in dried blood, sitting calmly on the couch, the decomposing corpses of his parents beside him. "Don't move, or I'll shoot!" Danzel barked, his hand on his gun. Bob raised his hands. Danzel covered up the murders, taking Bob under his wing. Over the years, he moulded Bob into a spy and assassin—a tool for his purposes. Bob excelled at killing, but he despised espionage, finding it tedious. Worse still, Danzel kept him trapped, threatening to expose his past if he ever tried to leave. Eventually, Bob devised a plan to free himself. Over months, he deliberately botched missions, creating enough trouble to provoke Danzel's wrath. Finally, Danzel snapped. Now, Bob stood on the subway platform, a grin on his face and a backpack on his shoulders. For the first time, he felt free. Boarding the train, Bob heard the powerful voice of the demon. The apocalypse was about to begin, and his story could finally unfold.
Morfus · 125.6K Views

One Wild Night

Lucinda Perry, a social recluse and a workaholic, makes a pledge to herself to go all wild on her twenty-fifth birthday and even score a one night stand if she gets her long deserved promotion at work. Few days to her twenty-fifth birthday, she gets promoted to not just a higher position but to the head office in a different city. Having to spend her birthday night in a new city, she goes to the club where she meets a very handsome stranger, Thomas Hank, who offers to be her one night stand after catching a glimpse of her dare-to-do list, which included having a one night stand. Thomas Hank, after having been used by several ladies in the past, is bent on getting the lady of his dreams who would love him for himself and not his wealth. So when he meets the cute and naive Lucinda Perry at the club, he decides to keep his true identity from her and find out if she was worth keeping. ***Excerpt*** What is more entertaining than a crazy side character? Say hello to Sonia and Bryan. Sonia's heart stopped beating for a second, and then different thoughts started flying right through her head at that same time. Bryan Hank? Her celebrity crush was kneeling right in front of her and asking her to be his wife? Was he mistaking her for someone? Was it possible this was a skit, or maybe this was like one of those celebrity pranks, and there were cameras around, waiting to capture her make a fool of herself? Or perhaps she was dreaming? Sonia wondered as she looked around them, but all she saw were curious onlookers. "Please! Be my wife and make me the happiest man on Earth," He said in a very loud voice that caught the attention of everyone. Her editor who she had been waiting on for over an hour because he was trying to sign a deal with a movie producer who was interested in one of her stories, showed up at that moment, "Sonia, you know Bryan Hank?" Her editor asked in genuine surprise as he watched the scene before him. It seemed like an hour had passed since Bryan went on his knees, but it had only been a minute. Bryan knew no lady would be crazy enough to accept such a crazy proposal, and even if any were, paying her off and calling off the whole thing would be easy since all he wanted was the scandal that could come from this. The headlines were either going to be about his rejected Marriage proposal or his supposed engagement, which would be enough to let Sophia off the hook. "Yes!" Sonia said as she bobbed her head excitedly and extended her finger for him to wear her the ring. "Yes?" Bryan asked in confusion when he heard her response. "Yes! I will be your wife and make you the happiest man in the world!" Sonia said with a giggle and wiggled her fingers until Bryan slid the ring down her finger. Surprisingly the ring was her exact size, and it sat on her finger like it was made just for her. The sound of applause erupted all around them as Sonia stood up with a big smile on her face and embraced Bryan before kissing him right on the lips. Bryan was slightly taken aback by her boldness but quickly recovered since this was his game, and he had to play along. He was the one who had approached her first, after all. So when she tried to break the kiss, he held her chin and slowly nibbled on her lower lip before parting her lips with his tongue and sucked on it in a teasing manner, eliciting a moan from Sonia. Sonia felt light-headed. This was too good to be true. It just had to be a dream. How else could she explain that one moment she was seated at the lobby of a hotel waiting for her editor, and the next she was engaged to her celebrity crush and was kissing him right here in the open? (PS: Photo belongs to me. Art by @imagineTishaD)
Miss_Behaviour · 7.1M Views

His Untouched Devotion (BL)

The sacred chamber was dimly lit, the scent of incense curling in the air like whispers of forgotten prayers. His breath came uneven, his hands trembled at his sides as he stared at the man before him—the warrior who should not have been here. "You shiver so easily," the warrior murmured, his voice dark, teasing. Tempting. His fingers brushed over the fine silk of the priest’s robe, not quite touching—just a whisper of heat, but enough to unravel him. "D-Don’t," he breathed, stepping back, but the warrior followed. "Don’t what?" The smirk in his voice was maddening. Mocking. Dangerous. "You know what exactly you are doing. This is unacceptable..." The warrior closed the space between them and placed his finger on his lips, causing his body to tremble. His throat bobbed. The rules of the sect were clear. He was supposed to be untouchable—unblemished in body and soul, a perfect example of godliness and pureness. And yet… "I can hear your heartbeat." The warrior leaned in, the tip of his nose barely grazing his jaw. Too close. "So wild… tell me, is it fear or something else?" His lips parted, but the words died on his tongue when strong hands found his wrist, tugging him forward, pressing him flush against the heat of his body. A sharp gasp escaped him. "Let me go," he whispered pleadingly. "Then go," the warrior challenged, loosening his grip—but his body refused to move. A sinful chuckle brushed against his ear. "See? You don’t want to leave." "I do." The lie burned his tongue. "Then why are you not?" A strangled sound escaped him as warmth pooled in his core—something he never should have felt. Something he never knew he could feel. His knees buckled, but before he could fall, strong arms caught him. Held him. Claimed him. "Look at you," the warrior hummed, his voice thick with something dangerous. "I barely touched you, and you’re already breaking. Doesn't this mean something to you, my moonflower?" The warrior looked into the divine one's eyes and noticed the change of color in his eyes which made him smirk as if he had gotten his lucky shot. His gaze darkened in return, sharp with an incomprehensible hunger and before the priest could utter another world, his lips were claimed. A single tear slipped free, rolling down his cheek—a silent surrender. He just couldn't do it. He couldn't fight against this burning desire in him anymore. He was just going to let it be—whatever would happen should happen. The warrior hummed in satisfaction at the taste of the divine one, his grip tightening. A gasp was swallowed whole as the warrior’s mouth moved against his, devouring, demanding, tasting. Heat licked down his spine, a fire awakening within him, spreading through his veins like an unspoken prophecy. "So beautiful," the warrior murmured against his lips before diving back in, stealing another kiss—deeper, rougher, hungrier. He was an angel worth sinning for. The Priest's fingers clutched at the fabric between them, desperate, lost, drowning. The world outside ceased to exist. Only this moment remained. Only this touch, this heat—this forbidden, maddening desire. And as the flames outside flickered wildly in the night, so too did he burn. . . . . Y'all, this picture was gotten from Pinterest. I only changed the names and added little design. I do not originally own it. Thank you.
IJE_5 · 985 Views
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