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Karma Collector

The Drunkard

"This is a fantastic supernatural Western that oozes tension, grit, and mythic heft. Elias Thorne is a fascinating antihero; the curse is sinister, the villains are mundane and eldritch, and the unyielding pressure applies. This is more than another gunslinger story because of the balance of horror, fate, and moral choice; it’s about the will’s ability to fight against the inevitable." Character: Elias Thorne Charismatic, imperfect, and balancing on the line between survival and damnation. His arc is riveting, transforming from reckless gambler to self-sacrificing bearer of the burden. This will make readers root for him and fear for him. The Curse & Its Rules The idea of “borrowed luck” is pretty simple and yet horrifying. The gradual unraveling of Elias’s fortune provides natural suspense, and the Collector as its enforcer makes it all the more ominous. Malachai & The Collector Malachai himself is an intimate, humanistic danger, while the Collector is a more inexplicably dark and inescapable force that lends Elias’s fate a sense of claustrophobia. Their give-and-take maintains the tension. Moral Dilemma  The central question of sacrificing another or suffering the curse himself raises this above a mere survival story. That internal struggle is what will haunt readers. Cinematic Atmosphere: Dusty saloons, moonlit canyons, a town where curses are the currency—it drips with style. It’s a Western at its core but sprinkled with unsettling, supernatural dread. Areas for Enhancement: The Connection Currently, she mainly describes the curse and helps Elias on his journey. Make it personal; give her something to lose. Maybe she wants the amulet back, or she has her own desperate agenda. The Collector’s Voice It’s sinister, but how does it talk? If it had a sense of comedic absurdity, if it addressed him in riddles that pile onto Elias’s decisions, it would be much scarier. More Western-Infused Prose Your world seems increasingly Western, but you could drive the dialogue and narration deeper into the biting, poetic Western voice (Blood Meridian, The Sisters Brothers) and go a long way toward treating the reader to more immersion. [Book Wow Factor] That is a very powerful basis. With just a few tweaks to Selene and the Collector and a touch more Western style infusing the prose, this could be an instant classic. If this were on your shelf, you would snatch it up.
iandino_dinoian · 1.7K Views

The Lone Star's Epilogue

Suffering is the instrument of existence, and sin is the melody of life. Now, negative karma is spreading throughout the Omniverse. To bring karma into balance in the cosmos, divine judgment must be bestowed upon every civilization within the Divine Omnistream. On the planet Tellus, divine judgment was delivered in SE 20 of Humanity's Space Era calendar following a series of devastating attacks by a mysterious terrorist organization that spread chaos across the planet. They orchestrated a survival game, forcing people to participate in senseless killings that fueled negative karma and sparked a war similar to the one between androids and humanity 90 years ago. Einsamer Stern is an 18-year-old high school student and orphan who has undergone backlash all of his life because his appearances are similar to an android, the enemy of humanity. The young protagonist must struggle to come out on top in the constant battle against intergalactic threats and earthly foes. But he soon learns that this happens to be the least of his concerns as the truth, about his identity and the history of mankind, slowly unravels, with the arrival of divine judgment on his planet. Initially driven by the simple desire to survive, Einsamer Stern's purpose evolved into a loftier ideal: "To cleanse humanity of sin and suffering." --------------------------------------------------- Daily Update: 4-7 chapters a week. Chapter length: 1500-3000 words Romance is not the primary focus, but explicit sexual scenes involving other characters that serve the plot can be expected. This story progresses at an intentionally slow pace, as I meticulously detail every fight scene and interaction to immerse the reader deeper into the world. There is no harem! @ALL RIGHT RESERVED @VISAL_WORD_SMITH
Visal_Word_Smith · 71.6K Views
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