Longer Jokes For Adults

What do you mean, people can attain immortality just by marriage? I don't like the prospect of marriage, I don't need immortality. What do you mean this world is cursed by Gods and a calamity will befall on it every 20 years? [ Ding! Host found....System initializing....1%........90%...........100% ] Of course, my golden finger as a transmigrator, fuck you world I won't follow your rules. [ Welcome Host!! System 'gotta catch em all' has activated. ] [ Now you can become the strongest just by marrying beauties..... aren't you a lucky guy.. hahahaha. ] "I'm doomed...." ……… I died protecting a dog in my previous life. Now, transmigrated as Einar Sanguis in a fantasy world full of mystical abilities, mythical creatures and breath taking view. I have to survive the upcoming calamity to enjoy such scenes. I have a easy route of marrying someone and becoming an immortal but I don't like the concept of marriage, I like being a solo player. I had my hopes on my system but the bastard betrayed me and now is actively trying to set me up with different girls. "System, you piece of junk. Can you please stop this nonsense!!!!" Now, I have to survive on my own. In a world filled with dangers on every step, luckily enough. I'm a royalty, something to be proud of. But there is also a slight chance that I'm a reject?? "Fuck me, sideways. What kind of trash luck do I have? " [ Your luck stat is 7 ] "You piece of shit." [ .⁠·⁠´⁠¯⁠`⁠(⁠>⁠▂⁠

the story of a boy who faced difficulties throughout his life, through such painful misery. Lost in the darkness, losing his identity until he no longer knows his true self.

"When the lowliest Omega barista sinks his teeth into the Alpha Queen's gland, our love becomes the weapon that shatters the world." As the most oppressed Omega, he'd never tasted "being loved"—until his feral claws tore through shackles that night, locking with the Arctic blaze in his sovereign's eyes. She who reigned supreme over the Alpha hierarchy defied the Covenant for him, her glacial armor dissolving where their skin met. Now their fated marks blaze in clasped palms while her frostblade severs the Blackthorn Council's lies, this lawless passion upending a thousand years of hierarchy far beyond mere escape. As the crimson moon rises, the world roars its ultimatum: "Perish together, or rewrite existence as one."

“A false accusation can ruin a life, but the truth will always prevail. False accusations are like a swift poison, destroying trust and relationships.” The second-year high school student name Youjin Kinoshita, who had been falsely accused not one time, not two times, but three times… by the girls he knows! Not only the false accusation changed Youjin’s life forever, but it’s even worse, the people he knew, especially his own family and friends, had no longer trusted him. During the incidents with him, they had been secretly monitored by something he secretly had in the whole time. So those evidences he got would be used as revenge on the girls who made false accusations. Will his revenge plan work? If so, will the people he knows including the false accusers apologize to him? And thanks to the girls who betrayed Youjin, he finally became cautious. So everyone around him are suspicious for him, but…

Reincarnated into the AV world after offering 100TB of adult videos to a deity, where countless erotic events unfold! AV | Harem | Exhibition | Slave | SMUT

It's funny, isn't it? Nobody asks to be born... None of us choose the life we are forced to live....And yet, we are bound to it, trapped in a world where strength defines everything. People worship when you are strong. They loathe when you are weak. They worship the god. They fear the devil. But why? Was it righteousness that gave the god victory over the devil, or was it simply strength? Why must we fear one and worship the other? Is the god so righteous? Is the devil so weak? Would Wang Xiao still have everything if he were weak? Would they still worship him? Would those women have submitted so easily? No. It's always the strength. Power rules all. A man can own kingdoms, riches, even love—but lose his strength, and the world turns on him. His woman, the one who once looked at him with admiration, will crush him underfoot if she finds him unworthy. His own children, born of his blood, will stare at him with contempt, their eyes filled with disappointment. What is love if not submission to power? What is loyalty but the price of dominance? Wang Xiao has learned this bitter truth. The sacrifices he made, the pain he endured, meant nothing. Without strength, he was nothing. But no longer... He has seen the lie, the illusion of it all... And now, the ancient myths rise once more, the gods claw their way from forgotten graves, and Wang Xiao, mistaken for the 8th Prince, feared by gods and mortals alike, finds himself at the center of it all. Seven goddesses, each more beautiful, more dangerous than the last, now circle him, bound by fate. Their charm is powerful, their desires even more so. The guardian of the Atlantic tears apart nations to possess him. The Desert Princess offers her entire empire as a gift, yearning for his love... Even an ancient being, her power stripped away, bends her knee in submission, once feared, now powerless before him. But would they have bowed if he were weak? Would they have loved him, served him, feared him? No. It's always the strength. "He 'who' covers the sky with his hand," they whisper. "The gods who once played with universes like orbs... he'll make them swallow their own spit in fear." Wang Xiao's gaze hardens as he stares at his reflection. The weak are forgotten... Strength is all that matters. "The world doesn't care for the weak," Wang Xiao whispers to his reflection. "Your woman will turn her back, people will spit on your name... They'll forget you ever existed... everything you did for them would be insignificant and forgetten...Strength is all that truly matters." And so, Wang Xiao will take what's his. The gods, playing with the universe like toys, will fall. The devils, pulling at the strings of fate, will lose their grip. He will strip them of their power, their kingdoms, their very souls, if that's what it takes. He isn't their pawn. Not anymore. Would they have bowed if he were weak? Would they have given themselves so easily? Would they have even cared? No. It's always the strength. Wang Xiao is no longer the man he once was. No longer human. No longer weak. He is the deviant. And the world will soon know what that truly means. --------------- #NoYuri #NoNTR #Threesome #Harem #Strong to Stronger #Elf #Gore #Evil MC #Conquor #Action #Adventure #Imperial Harem #Revenge #Daughters #Fellatio #Supernatural #Urbanfantasy #Superpowers #Cultivation #Goddess #First-time Intercourse #Villain ---------------- Warning: The Novel is based upon a fictional Earth, and any resemblance is mere coincidence! Discord: https://discord.gg/dsc4fftBeF **Cover Page is not owned by Author**

Lenna life is going great. Everything is fine. Orbs in peoples chests? A never ending hunger? Arguments with her best friend? Well... maybe it isn't going as great as she wants to belive. Her mother keeps secrets from her while the government chases Unexplainables, creatures that can't be explained by science. She is throughed into a world full of questions and mysteries were she is one of them.

What would you do if, on your deathbed, you were offered one last game? Would you choose a grand adventure? A tale of romance? A world to rule? Kayle made his choice—an adult game. A game he never got to experience in his first life. But instead of indulgence, he wakes up at rock bottom—a lowly servant boy in a crumbling brothel, trapped in a city on the brink of ruin. His goal remains the same: to enjoy the story he never got to play. Unfortunately, his very existence is already rewriting it. One day while walking through the streets of the capital city's slums, everyone suddenly bowed down to me. "Greetings! Godfather!" **** Disclaimer 1. "Is this a harem?" A common question from my previous novel, so I'll address it upfront. No, it is not. At least, not in the traditional sense. He'll have relationships with many girls, but most of them will be a fling. There will only be one final heroine. 3. If you decide to give my novel a try, first, thank you! Second, I would love if you could leave a few comments or a review. The feedback and confirmation that people are reading my book helps to keep me writing. 4. There is no smut in my book. I repeat, there is NO SMUT in my book. I know the title can be misleading, but I assure you, there is no smut in my book. (Important things should be repeated three times.) 5. I'm currently working on fixing my update schedule, but it should be sorted by March and will most likely be 3-4 chapters a week.

After three years of marriage, my wife still couldn’t forget her first love. Our love nest had a locked room, a promise she had reserved for her first love. As long as he returned, there would always be a place for him in our home. For him, she abandoned me time and time again. The last time, in order to fulfill a promise she had made with her first love, she deliberately drugged me, leaving me unconscious for three days. That time, I almost died. After being discharged from the hospital, I left a divorce agreement behind and vanished completely from her world. But then, she began searching for me frantically.

Unhappy and unfulfilled, Sirius is murdered. Instead of passing on, the boy is given another chance at life. He wakes in an unfamiliar world where the inhabitants despise humans. A strange, old man gifts Sirius a mysterious stopwatch slowly counting down to zero. When asked what it is ticking down to, the man replies: "Your memories." Will Sirius find a way to keep his memories while dealing with the struggles of his new life? Will he stay alive long enough to get the chance? Does he even want to keep his memories? Or will he break down crying... begging for more time?

Tony, a college sophomore struggling with academics and loneliness, returns home for Thanksgiving. Since his father’s passing, home has felt emptier than ever, and the holiday is no exception—it’s just him and his mother, Natasha. What starts as a simple family dinner soon turns into a night of unexpected tension when Tony begins to notice things about his mother he never did before. The quiet house, the subtle glances, and the strange dreams that follow begin to stir something deep inside him—something forbidden, something he shouldn't feel. As the boundaries of his emotions blur, Tony is forced to question his own desires and confront the unspoken secrets between him and Natasha. Will he suppress his thoughts and move on, or will this Thanksgiving become the turning point of a relationship that was never meant to change?

Love is blind as well as it sees clearer than any eye can, it is kind on one side and ruthless on the other it is the best thing to happen to loving heart but the worst nightmare to a broken soul

Warning! Mature Content Hernia is his to care for and he doesn’t care what the world thinks of that. >>>>>>> “We could date instead,” Hermia suggested, her voice laced with uncertainty. “I don’t date,” Niklaus replied coldly, his piercing gaze unwavering. Hermia blinked, caught off guard. “So it has to be marriage?” she asked, her tone laced with disbelief. “Yes,” he deadpanned, not a hint of hesitation in his voice. Her frustration bubbled over. “But we don’t even know each other!” she whined, throwing her hands up in exasperation. Niklaus leaned forward, his dark eyes gleaming. “I don’t need to know you, Mia,” he said, his voice dipping into a deep, dangerous tone. “When I can feel you… that’s enough for me.” She inhaled sharply, her heart hammering in her chest. “That’s not enough for me,” she countered, her voice firm but trembling slightly. His expression softened, and his next words wrapped around her like a promise. “I would forever cherish you, adore you, and treat you like the rarest gem. I would never let you shed a single tear of pain.” Her resolve wavered, but she shook her head and pushed back. “We’re not getting married, Shark. Just go.” But instead of leaving, he smirked, leaning back with a confidence that rattled her. “I’ll be waiting.” Hermia groaned, exasperated. “Nik, you’re hardly doing any waiting. You’re all over me! We live together, work together, eat together—you’re always here!” Niklaus’s voice dropped to a whisper, raw and pleading. “Then just keep me forever, Mia.” She froze, his honest, vulnerable eyes piercing through every defense she had built. Her heart quivered as she felt the weight of his words sink in. She didn’t know what to do. >>>>>>>> To the world, Niklaus Hathaway is ruthless—a man who takes what he wants, no matter the cost. But for Hermia, the girl who’s lost everything, he’s something else entirely: her unlikely savior whom she couldn’t blindly trust. He’s ruthless to everyone—except her. Niklaus Hathaway doesn’t date. He doesn’t waste time. He only wants what’s his. When Hermia steps into his life, he makes one thing clear: if she won’t marry him, she’ll work for him. Keeping her close is his only goal, and no amount of gossip, jealousy, or family betrayal will change that. But Hermia’s life isn’t as simple as working for the powerful CEO who’s claimed her as his. With an evil stepsister and manipulative parents determined to ruin her happiness, Hermia must fight for her place in a world that seems determined to push her out. Niklaus declared her his from the beginning—and he’ll stop at nothing to protect her, no matter the cost Love has never been this dangerous.

nah I not in mood to write fl so I will be leaving it here as a showpiece lol

Heartbroken after catching her boyfriend cheating with his colleague on Valentine's Day, Anya impulsively proposes to a stranger in a fit of rage. The stranger, a charming and enigmatic man, accepts her proposal without hesitation. As Anya grapples with the consequences of her impulsive decision, she discovers that her "husband" is not just a random passerby, but someone with a mysterious and powerful connection to her life. He's not just a stranger; he's her boyfriend's boss, a man known for his wealth and influence, but who has kept his true identity hidden from Anya. Now, trapped in a web of lies and deceit, Anya must navigate the treacherous waters of her unexpected marriage while uncovering the truth about her "husband" and his hidden agenda.

Take this gun, kill either me or your mom, cause am in love with your mom.

Like any 18 year old high school student, Kim Ji-Hye was just busy struggling with expectations and exams. The biggest worries? Overbearing parents and college entrance exams. That, of course, was the case until she accidentally found herself in an unexpected circumstance that led straight into the glowing gates of death! One moment, she was zoning out on an empty school corridor. The next? She was smack in the middle of a field that was way too over dramatic with the moon lighting up the surrounding and to add to it all, questioning all her life decisions. “What the hell? Where the HELL AM I?" Before she managed to figure out whether she had been taken hostage, sedated, or was indeed deceased, the reality had another surprise in store for her. The field evaporated. She was now in a never-ending white void. “Ah right, that is just brilliant. Another case of teleportation. Is my life really that boring that I actually find this exciting?” “Why do you think so?” a deep, unbothered voice replied. Ji-Hye screamed. Floating, there in front of her was a god that was the epitome of ‘a literal god.’ “WHO ARE YOU?” The God sighed. “Welcome Ji-Hye. I do not really know how you made it here, but… yeah, this is awkward.” Ji-Hye blinked. “Am I dead?” "Is that your final guess?" "Nope." “Then where am I?” "Alternate reality." “And how did I get here?” "Because your universe's God did an ‘oopsie’ and misplaced you." “Excuse me?” Apparently, some celestial treasure named Ezekiel was supposed to keep her safely in her time screwed up so badly that she ended up in a reality she wasn’t even supposed to exist in. THANKS EZEKIEL! "So what now?" Ji-hye asked, still trying to process the fact that divine beings are capable of making stupid mistakes The god who introduced himself in a head-turning fashion as Kashigami sighed once more. “Well, I need to send you back… but the thing is, I have no clue which universe is yours. So it might take some time.” “And how long is ‘some time’?” “Perhaps 500 years.” Ji-hye’s eyes had never been so wide. “WHAT IN THE FU–” And there started the journey which I (the author) could describe in many different ways, but for Ji-hye, it was undoubtedly the most unhinged. ✨ READ NOW TO FIND OUT: ✔ How does Ji-hye handle being an anomaly? ✔ Will Kashigami ever be useful? (Spoiler: Probably not.) ✔ Will she ever return home, or is she stuck in this SPACE WARP forever? 5K VIEWS CELEBRATION! JOIN THE DISCORD SERVER https://discord.gg/9Y2KUg3e code is "Ji-hye"

in the instant of it all there is something which remains is it the memories within? or the yearnings without? Tell me, oh tell me when sacred flaming eyes meet in the twilight zone, what with those searching looks, unsettled until the match is met? is it the undecided pat doing the rest In pure insanity? or the varying whispers that ceases in mid silence? Tell me, oh tell me now what to expect certainly when eyes are evaded and a smiling lip curves solely, what should I really expect? within the minute's pause there dwells possibilities for something to wilter without cause or maybe to spring with abilities!

Cigarette smoke curls in the stagnant air, the dim glow of a dying bulb casting twisted shadows against the walls littered with half-torn articles and red-thread connections. Somewhere between the ink-stained papers and the scattered pills, a man sits—silent, unmoving, staring blankly at a stuffed monkey in a clown suit. A detective, they call him. A man of justice, a solver of mysteries. But behind the applause and empty praises, behind the sharp smiles and hollow congratulations, he is nothing but a walking contradiction—one hand holding a case file, the other exchanging cash for little plastic sachets. His mind is a labyrinth of voices, whispers that coil around his thoughts like suffocating vines. His brother grins at him from the corners of his vision, eyes glinting with the truth he refuses to face. His father’s voice is gentle, forgiving—too forgiving. Too much for a man who doesn’t deserve it. Each pill swallowed is another step into the illusion, another moment of stolen happiness before the weight of reality drags him under. He walks the city streets, drowning in faces that admire him, loathe him, see him as something he is not. He is both a hero and a villain, a detective and a criminal, a man trying to outrun the past while shackled to its corpse. And at the end of the night, when the echoes of the world fall away, all that remains is the darkness, the whispers, and the suffocating truth—he can never escape them.

When groups of children get kidnapped and taken to an experimental institute for having supernatural abilities and being half-human and half-other, read to find out what happens after the main Character, Aaron, finds himself in an unlikely love triangle. Is everyone lying to him? What will happen to him? (BL)

In a thrilling sci-fi adventure, Troy, an ordinary teenager, is thrown into an extraordinary battle when Barry, a mysterious guy from the future, arrives. Barry reveals that Troy is the chosen one, the only person capable of stopping the alien race known as the Kallunkas from conquering the universe. Equipped with powerful watches forged from Itemis, a mysterious element that grants superhuman abilities, Troy must master his newfound powers and confront unimaginable dangers. With the fate of humanity resting on their shoulders, Troy and Barry form an unlikely alliance and journey across time and space to outwit the Kallunkas. As they face fierce enemies and daunting challenges, their partnership becomes the universe's last hope for a future free from the tyranny of the Kallunkas.....

" ch... Choi... Yoo-ona ... I am sorry ... Ple-please let... Let me... Go...." he cried for mercy but it did not affect her. Her eyes was carving for revenge. Her whole body was turned red and she was burning as fire. This time she was definitely looked like the assistant of devil! " please l-let me go... Ple-please... " he endlessly begged to her but she react as she didn't hear him. Now that he has saw his end he want my mercy. She laughed crazily on his request like it was some kind of joke to her. She controlled her laugh and a devil smile appeared on her face. Eyeing him she said, " what is the meaning of begging, when you already did wrong thing." Saying this she knifed him on his heart.. He widened his eyes in pain and fear, this girl before him has totally changed. He begged her but she cruelly killed him. And she laughed watching his expressions like what happen just now was nothing but a satisfaction for her. She will kill everyone who did wrong to her. She is seeking for revenge....

In a world ruled by billions of superhumans, one young man stands out—not for his power, but for his lack of it. Born without any abilities in a society that worships strength, Arin has always been labeled as insignificant. After the heartbreaking loss of his beloved grandfather, the last anchor in his life, Arin finds himself utterly alone—an outcast drowning in the harsh realities of a world that mocks his simplicity. But when all seems lost, fate intervenes. A mysterious system awakens within him, offering him a chance to rewrite his destiny. -[Welcome, Host. The path to power begins now.] -[Complete this quest to increase your power.] -[Failure will result in death.] -[Warning: The weak have no place in this world. Adapt, or perish.] Driven by the system’s high-stakes challenges, Arin embarks on an extraordinary journey, battling monsters, defying expectations, and shattering the limits placed upon him. As he rises from the shadows, Arin must navigate a dangerous world that once rejected him, learning not only to survive but to thrive. Can he prove that true strength lies not in abilities, but in determination and heart? Or will his newfound power drive him down a darker path, leaving him more isolated than ever? Join Arin’s epic tale of redemption, courage, and self-discovery—a story where being different is the ultimate power.