Dirty Sex Jokes Quotes For Him

Dive into a thrilling portal fantasy book - "Conman: The Fire Magician," an epic LitRPG tale of cunning, survival, and magic. Unjustly killed on the grimy streets of earth, Chrix is granted a fantastical resurrection in a realm teeming with magic, mythical creatures, and electrifying adventures. This LitRPG reincarnation catapults him from a conman navigating the perils of street life to a newcomer in a deadly world of dragons and mythical creatures. With no combat or magical prowess, Chrix is the ultimate underdog in this LitRPG portal fantasy. His survival hinges on his quick wit and innate cunning. He enters a dangerous situation that defies the laws of life and death. In a world where survival of the fittest isn't just an aphorism, but a way of life, can he adapt and thrive, or is he destined to meet his doom? Experience a snapshot of this thrilling action & adventure, an episode where an accusation cuts as sharply as a dagger, "You're a dirty rotten cheat!" But as a deadly blade flies towards him, Chrix's litrpg epic fantasy truly begins. A shield of blue energy materializes to halt the dagger's path. The calm reveal of his magical prowess leaves his accusers in stunned silence. His utterance, "Fire magician, actually," ricochets through the room, intensifying the tension. His real gamble? Surviving a second attack with just a hastily cast shield. It's a high-stakes bluff in a world where errors are lethal. But what fate awaits him if his luck runs out? Embark on this exhilarating journey of sword & sorcery and witness Chrix's transformation in this thrilling reincarnation fantasy LitRPG. Find your place in a world where nothing is as it seems. Will he become a master of magic, or will his cons lead to his downfall? As the tale unravels, so does Chrix's fate in this spellbinding portal fantasy book. "Conman: The Fire Magician" is a must-read for fans of Books › Science Fiction & Fantasy › Fantasy › Dragons & Mythical Creatures, Books › Science Fiction & Fantasy › Fantasy › Action & Adventure, and Books › Science Fiction & Fantasy › Fantasy › Sword & Sorcery. It's time to turn the page and leap into adventure. (Note this has been rewritten for publishing on the web)

I wrote these sonnets, poems, and quotes; in the darkest hours of my life and I hope some of you could relate. I write with all the love and joy I have for writing, just because I don't publish anything doesn't I still don't write behind closed doors.

Heartbroken after catching her boyfriend cheating with his colleague on Valentine's Day, Anya impulsively proposes to a stranger in a fit of rage. The stranger, a charming and enigmatic man, accepts her proposal without hesitation. As Anya grapples with the consequences of her impulsive decision, she discovers that her "husband" is not just a random passerby, but someone with a mysterious and powerful connection to her life. He's not just a stranger; he's her boyfriend's boss, a man known for his wealth and influence, but who has kept his true identity hidden from Anya. Now, trapped in a web of lies and deceit, Anya must navigate the treacherous waters of her unexpected marriage while uncovering the truth about her "husband" and his hidden agenda.

Like any 18 year old high school student, Kim Ji-Hye was just busy struggling with expectations and exams. The biggest worries? Overbearing parents and college entrance exams. That, of course, was the case until she accidentally found herself in an unexpected circumstance that led straight into the glowing gates of death! One moment, she was zoning out on an empty school corridor. The next? She was smack in the middle of a field that was way too over dramatic with the moon lighting up the surrounding and to add to it all, questioning all her life decisions. “What the hell? Where the HELL AM I?" Before she managed to figure out whether she had been taken hostage, sedated, or was indeed deceased, the reality had another surprise in store for her. The field evaporated. She was now in a never-ending white void. “Ah right, that is just brilliant. Another case of teleportation. Is my life really that boring that I actually find this exciting?” “Why do you think so?” a deep, unbothered voice replied. Ji-Hye screamed. Floating, there in front of her was a god that was the epitome of ‘a literal god.’ “WHO ARE YOU?” The God sighed. “Welcome Ji-Hye. I do not really know how you made it here, but… yeah, this is awkward.” Ji-Hye blinked. “Am I dead?” "Is that your final guess?" "Nope." “Then where am I?” "Alternate reality." “And how did I get here?” "Because your universe's God did an ‘oopsie’ and misplaced you." “Excuse me?” Apparently, some celestial treasure named Ezekiel was supposed to keep her safely in her time screwed up so badly that she ended up in a reality she wasn’t even supposed to exist in. THANKS EZEKIEL! "So what now?" Ji-hye asked, still trying to process the fact that divine beings are capable of making stupid mistakes The god who introduced himself in a head-turning fashion as Kashigami sighed once more. “Well, I need to send you back… but the thing is, I have no clue which universe is yours. So it might take some time.” “And how long is ‘some time’?” “Perhaps 500 years.” Ji-hye’s eyes had never been so wide. “WHAT IN THE FU–” And there started the journey which I (the author) could describe in many different ways, but for Ji-hye, it was undoubtedly the most unhinged. ✨ READ NOW TO FIND OUT: ✔ How does Ji-hye handle being an anomaly? ✔ Will Kashigami ever be useful? (Spoiler: Probably not.) ✔ Will she ever return home, or is she stuck in this SPACE WARP forever? 5K VIEWS CELEBRATION! JOIN THE DISCORD SERVER https://discord.gg/9Y2KUg3e code is "Ji-hye"

Lucian unit Master.... Ouch Please stop Lucian keep thrusting hard in her with each thrusts his balls come in contact with her pussy

Blessing met himself in a situation where he had to choose between two ladies; A lady who was adopted by his grandparents at his request, who became his step-sister, and whom he fell in love with becoming his first love. Someone who changed his world and everything about him. Someone who made him realize everyone can be loved and deserves to be loved. Someone who made him realize what it felt like to live a happy life. Someone who made him realize the world is a lovely place to live in when you decide to live your life. Someone who gave him courage, a smile, and happiness. Someone who changed his lonely life into a lovely life, and made him realize he was a special person. Someone who taught him not to be ashamed of anything. Or The Lady he met who became his second love and his first girlfriend. Someone who showed him and taught him everything he knew about sex. Someone who loved him regardless of his scar or who he was when he thought only his step-sister could love him. Someone who accepted his love before he could even ask. Someone who promises to spend the rest of her with him. Someone he had his first kiss and touch with. Someone who taught him all about a lady. Blessing had to make a hard decision between those two ladies because it was a must that he had to choose. Blessing chose to tell his story so you could where he went wrong with his decision.

Standalone stories exploring bondage sex, dominance and submission, captivating power dynamics, threesome, multifuck and rape. Indulge in your wildest dreams, brought to life on every page :)

CURRENTLY UNDER EDITING Started: May 22, 2020 I was born in this world having the sex organ of a man. So basically, I'm a man. However, I could get pregnant, too, like female species. Why? Oh, it's because I'm an Omega, specifically a recessive one. That is my second gender. I've never felt troubled with my second gender before like other omegas. I've been in such a protective and loving family. My mother always sheltered me with a lot of loving and care. My father was always there to protect and guide me. I also have two incredible older brothers. They're twins, yet they watch and love me in their own way. I also have my reliable beta best friend. He's my partner in crime, and I'm so thankful to him. Like I'd said, I never felt troubled about my second gender, but that was before I've met my 'fated mate'. The person who was sent by God to love me. And... my fated mate was really unexpected. Because even before I found out that he's my mate... he's already part of my life.

Patron, we did not have the money but. A man lifts his face towards us and I see the most beautiful man in my life. But in his dark gaze, we can see anger: - Band of incapable you let him escape? You have to bring me his head. She must give me back my money! - She gave us her daughter in compensation. - Where's it? He pulls me behind them to show me the gentleman. He looks at me carefully. I lower my head, because his gaze is very intimidating. What will he do with me? Why did my mother give it as an object? I should have run away from my home when I had the opportunity. What will I get now? For months I suffer his assaults, for months, I take it upon myself. But, there, I can't take it anymore, I run away, if not, he will kill me because I am pregnant and no woman should have her child! I want to protect my life and that of my child. But, he ends up finding me .....

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I wanna destroy that tight p*ssy of yours....... Ahh!!! let me go you bastard.. I promise I won't tell anyone hahahah who will you tell darling... said Liam to Sarah.......

Gu Shan, once a revered and talented cultivator of the Nine Heavens, was banished to low-level worlds, deprived from his immortality with a relentless curse. His crime? he just saw the face of one and only precious disciple of the Celestial Emperor. He was then trapped in an endless cycle of rebirth. To end this, he needed to accumulate massive good karmic points. The mission was designed to be impossible for a mortal to achieve. Despite this, Gu Shan did not give up and devises what he believed to be a foolproof plan. However, he failed in the end. The required karmic points is just a pretense. "Screw you Celestial Emperor! If you want to play dirty, I'll take you head on!" In that moment, Gu Shan will thrive a path that even the Nine Heavens has never been heard of.

This I'd be on two boys love each other but they don't know they really love each other

Omer has a knack for finding humor in the most unexpected places. From his witty comebacks to his lighthearted pranks, Omer's life is a whirlwind of laughter and surprises. But behind his sharp sense of humor lies a deeper story—one of resilience, self-discovery, and connection. "Joke With Omer" is a heartwarming tale that weaves comedy with moments of introspection, as Omer navigates the ups and downs of friendship, love, and the challenges that life throws his way. This book invites readers to see the world through Omer's unique lens, where every situation holds the potential for a laugh and a lesson. Whether it's turning everyday chaos into comedy or uncovering joy in the darkest moments, "Joke With Omer" is a celebration of the healing power of humor and the importance of never taking life too seriously.

"I married you," He whispers and nuzzles into my neck, "No one has the right to insult or humiliate the woman I chose to be my wife..." "Even if she cannot wait for your throne built on bones to crumble down?" I retorted sharply and tore my gaze from the body lying inches away from us. "Even if she is about to shove a dagger in my heart." My eyes widen and the dagger within my grasp collides with the ground. George grins. ----- Anastasia is betrothed to the King of Keyes in her sister’s place from one day to the next, and she may not know a lot about life, but she knows she does not want to be a wife - much less a Queen in waiting. And not to the man who murdered her father in cold blood. She is set to make him pay for everything, watch his castle of blood crumble down, and enjoy it all while she's at it; but it's a good thing all he wants is to take her heart and then take her to bed.

I HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOY THIS BOOK THIS IS MY FIRST BOOK SO PLS BEAR WITH ME

"Please baby" He pleads trying to pull her into his arms but she glares at him. "Don't touch me" With a harsh glare she turns to face the other side. "That is the thing about you rich brats, you think everything can be gotten with daddy and momny's money well congrats we are married but don't even think for a second that I'll love you" "let me go" She pleads trying to escape his arms. "That will mean letting go of my breath baby and you know it's impossible" Attending the Academy meant for the elites has always been a dream of many and so when she receives the admission to go study in a school way above her league she agrees. She meets four crazy girls along with her cousin and she starts understanding life. Catching the eyes of a mysterious wealthy man who volunteers to be her benefactor but with a deal in place. The other girl who is from a middle class family catches the eyes of the most popular boy in the school who is also the most desired. The scandalous life of the rich daughter who is in a secret tryst. The wanna be popular girl whose closets are filled with skeleton. The rich brat who wants to enjoy life And a greedy human They all collide and go through life together. "I want you to marry my son, living is impossible without you by his side" She stares wide eyed at the woman in front of her, a very important figure pleading for her to marry her brat of a son. "You cannot escape destiny darling and yours is tied with mine" He says the arrogance dripping off his voice. "I am sure you remember all those nights by my side sweetheart"