"Hey, Azumi, you're zoning out again!"
The voice belonged to Ayomi Akiri and it yanked Azumi out of his reverie. Azumi Tamada and Ayomi walked home together every day after school, a ritual they had followed since childhood. The evening sun sent warm rays of orange light falling across the street, and the smell of freshly baked goods from a nearby bakery wafted by.
"I'm sorry," Azumi muttered while scratching the back of his neck.
"You're making me pout," Ayomi sighed. "What has happened to you? You barely talk anymore."
"Do I?" Azumi forced a laugh. "I guess I'm just tired."
"Hmm..." An arched eyebrow was her obvious response.
Azumi faced forward in order to avoid her penetrating gaze, lacking the courage to tell her what indeed lay behind that silence.
How to explain that everything is different now?
"Azumi Tamada!"
The teacher's voice reverberated through the classroom and dragged Azumi back from his doodling. He blinked and looked up at the teacher, who was glaring down at him with her arms crossed.
"You are dreaming again," the teacher sighed. "Do you know what I just said?"
"Uh..." Azumi glanced at his notes-there was nothing on them.
Before he could retort, Ayomi leaned over and whispered, "Page 42. Don't screw it up again."
"Page 42," Azumi blurted out, and a few giggles erupted from the class.
Sigh. The teacher couldn't be bothered to move on; Azumi breathed short relief and nodded gratefully to Ayomi.
"You owe me for that one," Ayomi whispered mischievously grinning.
"Yeah, yeah..." Azumi murmured, but the warm feeling in his chest lasted much longer than it should have.
"Let us buy some snacks before heading home," Ayomi suggested.
Azumi trod into their usual conbini with him. Melon bread pack found his way into her hand while he grabbed a can of iced coffee.
"Still the gamer fuel," Ayomi teased, scrutinizing his drink.
"Hey, I really need the energy," said Azumi with a pretense of cool.
Ayomi grinned. "For what? Staying up again just bonding with your anime waifus?"
Azumi nearly gagged himself choking on air. "I-It's not that!"
"Sure, sure." Ayomi winked, and Azumi's face flushed.
Why does she have to do this always?
Ayomi kept spewing the latest updates on their favorite anime as they walked back. All Azumi did was nod in response for he was deep in another world.
He eyed her in the corner, catching glimpses of her brown hair swaying gently with the light breeze, and those usual beaming bright expressions that had his heart thumping.
When did I… start seeing her like this?
"Azumi?" Ayomi's voice pulled him back to reality.
"Huh?"
"You are really out of it today," she softly said. "Everything okay?"
Azumi hesitated, but forced a smile, "Yeah... just tired."
Ayomi did not pry forward for an explanation but lingered a moment longer over him with her eyes than usual.
Azumi lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. His room was dimly lit by the glow of his computer screen, but he didn't feel like playing games tonight.
Why can't I just tell her?
They'd been together forever. Best friends who shared everything—except for this one truth Azumi couldn't bring himself to say.
If I tell her… and she doesn't feel the same…
The thought alone made his chest tighten.
Azumi sighed and logged into his favorite online game. A notification popped up.
[Ayomi-chan is online.]
"Of course…" Azumi muttered with a small smile.
Before he could invite her to a match, a message appeared.
Ayomi-chan: "Oi, where's my opponent? Don't tell me you're too scared to lose tonight?"
Azumi smirked and typed back.
Azumi: "Get ready to lose."
They jumped into a match, their banter flowing effortlessly. Here, behind a screen, things felt normal. Safe.
But Azumi knew—real life isn't as easy as a game.
---
"If only feelings could be reset like in a game… but this isn't that easy, is it?"