In a veil of silent desolation, the days blended together. The quiet between them was stifling, even though Alex had vowed to return after his week-long absence. Amma threw herself into her artwork and the planning of her next show in an attempt to keep herself occupied. However, the pain in her chest persisted regardless of how much she painted or how many hours she spent at the gallery.
Her paintbrush was hovering above the canvas as she sat at her easel. The muted hues in front of her mirrored the weight in her heart. She had attempted to depict the feelings that were rushing through her, such as fear, hope, and longing, but the brushstrokes seemed lifeless, and the fire that typically drove her work was absent.
She was startled out of her reverie by the buzzing sound of her phone. She glanced at the screen, her heart leaping when she saw Alex's name. She answered quickly, her voice trembling. "Alex?"
"Hey," his voice was soft, but there was a warmth to it that made her chest tighten. "How are you?"
Amma blinked back tears, her grip tightening on the phone. "I'm… okay. I miss you."
"I miss you too," Alex said, his voice filled with regret. "I just… I needed some time to think. To figure things out."
Amma nodded, though he couldn't see her. "I understand. But Alex… I'm here for you. We can go through anything you're going through together.
Alex remained silent for a while, and the weight of his uncertainty made Amma's heart hurt. "I understand, Amma. And for that, I am thankful. But I'm going to have to do this myself. For the time being.
Amma's chest constricted, but she made herself remain composed. "All right. Just make me a guarantee that you will return.
"I swear," Alex stated in a forceful voice. "Amma, I'll get back to you. Regardless.
Amma felt both relieved and uneasy as the call came to an end. Though the distance between them felt like a gulf she wasn't sure how to traverse, Alex's comments were consoling.
---
Amma was awakened by her doorbell the following morning. She looked at the clock and scowled. It was too early for tourists. When she spotted Jones standing on the other side, her pulse skipped a beat as she padded to the door after pulling on a robe.
"Jones," she said, her voice filled with surprise. "What are you doing here?"
Jones smiled, though it didn't reach his eyes. "I must speak with you. May I enter?
Amma paused, but she nodded because of the sincerity in his face. She moved out of the way so he could enter the flat. He glanced about, his eyes resting on the artwork on the walls.
"Your work is incredible," he said, his voice filled with admiration. "You've really found your voice."
Amma's cheeks flushed, but she shook her head. "Thank you, but… why are you here, Jones?"
Jones turned to her, his expression serious. "I have a proposition for you. An opportunity for business.
Amma scowled as her interest was aroused. "What sort of chance is this?"
With his gaze fixed on hers, Jones inhaled deeply. "I would like to hire you on a project. A collection of artworks for my new Gozo hotel. You are the most qualified candidate I can think of for this well-known project.
Amma's mind raced as her eyes grew wide. This kind of commission might revolutionise her career. However, working with Jones was like returning to a life she had fought so hard to escape.
"Jones, I She started, but her throat caught the words.
Jones took a step forward, his face softening. "I understand that our relationship is complex, Amma. It's not about us, though. It all comes down to your desire and talent. You are deserving of this chance.
As she looked into his face, Amma's chest constricted. In order to shield herself from the feelings that being with Jones evoked, she wanted to say no. However, the opportunity to exhibit her work on such a large scale was too good to pass up for the artist in her.
Her voice trembled as she eventually answered, "I... I need to think about it."
Jones gave a nod, his face showing comprehension. "Obviously. Go slowly. But know, Amma, that I have faith in you. always had.
Amma blinked away the tears that welled up in her eyes. "I'm grateful, Jones. I will inform you.
---
Amma remained on the couch after Jones departed, her thoughts whirling. The opportunity he'd offered was everything she'd ever wanted for her career. But working with him felt like opening a door she'd worked so hard to close.
The sound of her phone buzzing pulled her from her thoughts. She glanced at the screen, her heart leaping when she saw Mary's name.
"Hey," she murmured with a tone of relief. "I need your opinion."
"Obviously," Mary said in a kind and comforting voice. "What's happening?"
Amma inhaled deeply and let everything out, including the conflict in her emotions, Jones's offer, and Alex's departure. Mary was a reassuring anchor as she listened quietly.
Mary said, "Wow," when Amma was done. "That's a lot."
"I understand," Amma responded, her voice quivering. Mary, I'm at a loss for what to do. This opportunity is all I've ever desired. However, working with Jones is like going back in time.
Mary remained quiet for a while, and Amma could practically hear her contemplating. "Amma, here's the thing. You've put in a lot of effort to get this point. Additionally, this opportunity has the potential to advance your career. However, there is one thing you must ask yourself.
"What is that?" With her heart racing, Amma enquired.
"Is it possible to distinguish between the personal and the professional?" Mary said in a stern tone. "Go for it if you can collaborate with Jones without allowing your history to influence your decisions. However, it might not be worth it if you believe it would affect your mental health.
Mary couldn't see Amma, but she nodded. "You're correct. I have to give this some serious thought.
Mary softened her tone and continued, "I've got your back, whatever you decide." Amma, you underestimate your strength. Remember that.
---
Amma was sitting on the terrace that night with her sketchpad on her lap. Valletta's mind was everything but tranquil, even though the stars above her sparkled like a strewn-about diamond. The choice still felt unattainable, even after she had spent the day considering the advantages and disadvantages of Jones's offer.
She was startled out of her reverie by the buzzing sound of her phone. When she saw Alex's name on the screen, her heart skipped a beat.
She trembled as she said, "Hey." "How are you?"
"I'm fine," Alex responded in a quiet voice. "I simply wanted to listen to your voice."
Amma's emotions were a jumbled mass, and her chest constricted. "Alex, I miss you."
"I miss you too," Alex said, his voice filled with regret. "But I'm getting closer to figuring things out. I promise."
Amma nodded, though he couldn't see her. "I believe you. And Alex… I need to tell you something."
"What is it?" Alex asked, his tone concerned.
Amma took a deep breath, her heart pounding. "Jones offered me a commission. A big one. For his new hotel in Gozo."
Alex was silent for a long moment, and Amma's chest ached with the weight of his hesitation. "What did you say?"
"I haven't decided yet," Amma said, her voice trembling. "I wanted to talk to you first."
Alex sighed, his voice filled with a mix of emotions. "Amma, this is your decision. Not mine. But whatever you choose, I'll support you."
Amma's eyes filled with tears, but she blinked them away. "Thank you, Alex. That means a lot."
The call ended, leaving Amma feeling both relieved and unsettled. She knew what she had to do. She picked up her phone and dialed Jones's number, her heart pounding as she waited for him to answer.
"Jones," she said, her voice firm. "I'll do it. I'll take the commission."
Jones's smile was audible through the phone. "You won't regret this, Amma. I promise."
As she hung up, Amma felt a glimmer of hope. The road ahead wouldn't be easy, but she was ready to face it—on her own terms.