The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and the world is boring.
I am having some chips with some salad, lying down on my couch and watching some stupid 20th-century silent film. It's kinda funny though - that tiny moustache guy is really skilled. It's also cool to not have any mosquitoes murmuring merrily around my mango juice mixed with melon sauce. I should have wiped them out way before yesterday - kinda dumb of me, to be honest.
There we go again - it's time for some stupid somatotropic-hormone-drinking sperm monster to shatter my dream of a peaceful morning. It's wrecking some satellite planets orbiting around the neighbouring star system - some billion guys might be dead by now 'coz I forgot, but meh.
What's good enough to be my vessel? Yeah, this chip will be fine. Woop! There goes the chip ten light years away, I kinda love dark fluid. Now, where's the alien monster? Oh, he's brushing his teeth with a continental plate. Well, whatever, woop! There turns the monster into my lifetime supply of cotton candy. Magnifico!
Ah, crap! Why's Eight knocking on my door this early in the morning?
Come in! Quid est, Octo?
"I hate you, Agent Zero."
Eh, I know, I know. What is it now? Quid est?
"You knew that Spermati-Somati Saura was gonna attack now, didn't you?"
Uh, you mean that monster? Yeah, I did. So?
"So, why didn't you save that colony?"
Eh, I forgot.
"- _ -"
What's that look for? At least I saved the four neighbouring colonies!
"Three billion humans and twenty billion bots died!"
Thirty billion humans and two hundred billion bots lived!
*Facepalm*
C'mon! No one would have lived if it weren't for me. It's better than having everyone killed, right?
"You know this is the very reason the other nine Agents hate you."
Nine likes me though.
"Except that newbie, the rest of us all hate you!"
So what? I don't care. You got anything else to say?
"Even if I did, it wouldn't matter to you. Why are you like this!"
I don't care about anything, nothing matters - honestly. Anything else?
"Oh yeah, Agent Nine's coming. He told me that he wants to train with you."
Why now, so early in the morning?
"It's literally 12 o'clock."
Eh, I don't care. Let him come, I like that kid. Now, you can get the hell outta here!
"Yeah, yeah."
Eight left. Scruffy teen, that one, phew!
You know, God, if you are indeed listening to me - sometimes, I really want to erase everything. Nothing really matters to me since Leo died. Only if Melzi lived, I would have at least had a friend. But you had to take him away like Leo, didn't you? And yeah, although I married her just to get some money, Bianca was not bad - she was pretty. It's really boring to be immortal, damn it, I hate you, God!
Now, what did Eight say? Oh yes, Nine's coming, yay! I like that kid. He reminds me of when I first joined Leo's workshop. I used to look like him. Leonardo was an awesome teacher to me - I hope I prove to be the same to him! Ah, my Leo... Leonardo da Vinci… Your Salai really misses you…
Crash!
"Oh sorry, Sensei! I didn't want to break the door like that!"
Nineeeeeeeee!!! It's alright, dude, that's today's lesson for you!
"Sorry, I didn't get you, Sensei. What do you mean?"
Today, you are going to reverse entropy and fix this door!
"OH NO SHI-!"
Next Chapter: I love Physics!