The sun rose lazily over the forest, casting golden light through the trees. Birds chirped, insects buzzed—and four Demon Slayers sat completely silent, still trying to comprehend what they witnessed the night before.
Saitama snored peacefully, drooling on a rock.
"Did he really… flick a pebble… and kill an Upper Moon?" Zenitsu whispered, his face pale. "Am I awake? Is this a fever dream?"
"It happened," Tanjiro confirmed, though he sounded like he was trying to convince himself. "I saw it. I smelled it. Akaza's scent was completely erased."
Inosuke, unusually quiet, sat cross-legged, staring at his swords. "What's the point of training if bald guy can just sneeze on demons and make them explode?"
"Maybe… we should learn his training," Tanjiro suggested.
"NO WAY!" Zenitsu waved his hands wildly. "If three years of training makes you like that, my body will collapse before the first month!"
Before they could continue, a sudden gust of chilling air swept through the clearing. Tanjiro's nose twitched again.
"Another demon…"
This time, Doma strolled into view, his usual unnerving smile stretched across his face. His rainbow-colored eyes gleamed with curiosity.
"Oh my~ I was coming to see Akaza, but it seems someone already cleaned him up." His gaze settled on the still-sleeping Saitama. "So it's you… the legendary bald man."
"Legendary?" Zenitsu whispered. "He's only been here for like two days!"
Doma clapped his hands together cheerfully. "Alright! Let's see what all the fuss is about!"
He raised his fans, ready to unleash his deadly Cryokinesis, but before he could even finish his pose, Saitama rolled over in his sleep—straight into Doma's leg.
CRACK.
Doma's lower body vaporized into frozen dust.
"…Huh?" Doma blinked, his upper half falling to the ground. "What just—"
Saitama sat up, yawning.
"Morning already?"
He looked down at the half-Doma lying there, confused and twitching.
"Oh. Whoops."
Tanjiro, Zenitsu, and Inosuke just stared, their eyes hollow.
"Another Upper Moon…" Tanjiro's voice trembled. "And he didn't even wake up properly…"
"HOW IS THAT FAIR?!" Zenitsu screamed. "This guy's life is on easy mode!"
Saitama scratched his head, disinterested.
"Another demon, huh? Is this gonna happen every day?"
Nezuko popped out of her box and gave him a cheerful little wave.
"Morning, kid."
Nezuko grinned and gave him a thumbs-up.
Doma's upper body dragged itself across the ground, somehow still smiling. "Wait, wait, wait! Let's talk about this! I'm actually a great listener!"
Saitama raised a fist.
"Nah."
One punch. Doma ceased to exist.
---
Meanwhile, at Muzan's Hideout
Muzan's tea cup shattered in his hand. The room temperature dropped several degrees.
Kokushibo, standing nearby, opened his many eyes in shock.
"…Upper Moon Two… erased."
Muzan's rage boiled silently, his fingers digging into his throne. "I want this bald man found. I will face him myself if I have to."
"But Muzan-sama," Kokushibo's voice was heavy with concern, "if the legends are true, not even you…"
"Silence." Muzan's eyes glowed crimson. "No human can stand above me."
---
Back at the Camp
Saitama munched on the cabbage from yesterday, while the others sat nearby, still unable to process their new reality.
"So… what do we even do now?" Inosuke asked, his voice strangely small.
"Same thing we always do," Tanjiro said, trying to find his resolve. "We train. We protect people. We fight demons."
"And if we fail, Baldy flicks them into space?" Zenitsu muttered.
"Pretty much," Tanjiro admitted.
Saitama shrugged. "I'm just here until I figure out how to get home."
"How did you even get here?" Tanjiro asked, curious for the first time.
"Dunno. I went to buy groceries and walked into a weird alley. Next thing I knew, bam—sword kids and demons."
"…That's it?"
"Yeah."
Zenitsu pulled at his hair. "This story makes no sense!"
Saitama stood up and stretched. "Alright, if no more demons are gonna show up, I'm gonna take a nap."
At that exact moment, Kokushibo's dark aura swept through the forest. Tanjiro's face went pale.
"No way… already?"
Kokushibo stepped into the clearing, his six eyes scanning everything. "So… you are the bald one."
Saitama sighed. "Can you guys stop showing up every morning? I'm trying to relax."
Kokushibo drew his blade, the cursed steel humming with power. "I am Upper Moon One, Kokushibo. Prepare yourself."
Saitama frowned. "Did you just… ignore my question?"
Kokushibo dashed forward, blade slicing through the air like lightning. The slashes were so fast, they split the ground into ribbons.
Saitama dodged, by accident, when he bent down to pick up a rock.
"Huh. Neat-looking rock."
Kokushibo's attacks missed completely.
Saitama stood up, rock in hand. "You want this back?"
Before Kokushibo could respond, Saitama tossed the rock toward him—casually, almost lazily.
The rock pierced Kokushibo's chest, causing his body to implode into nothing but mist.
Silence.
"...Did I do something wrong?" Saitama asked.
Tanjiro quietly packed up their supplies. "Let's just… move camp."
"Good idea," Zenitsu agreed, face blank with trauma.
"Yeah," Inosuke muttered, voice shaking. "Bald guy's cursed or something."
Nezuko happily clapped, completely unfazed.
Saitama, confused but too lazy to argue, followed the group down the forest path, wondering if today's lunch would involve something other than cabbage.
---
End of Chapter 23