"He's just like a brother to me, honey. Don't be an insecure little manchild."
"B-but—"
"Shhh…"
Alexa booped Jeff's nose like he was a whiny toddler.
"Tonight is Adonis's night, babe. He's your bestie, your bro, your ride-or-die. So stop pouting like I just stole your last chicken nugget and enjoy the damn party. Nothing's gonna happen, alright?"
Before Jeff could protest, Alexa shot him a dazzling smile and strutted off, her golden sequin dress clinging to her curves like it was painted on.
The thing barely covered her ass, and yet, somehow, it had the audacity to ride up with every step, like even gravity wanted in on the action.
Her open back exposed so much skin that Jeff swore he could hear the collective horny gasps from half the guys in the room.
The party was wild—booze flowing, bodies grinding, the DJ blasting beats that made bad decisions feel like great ideas.
But Jeff was just standing there, gripping his drink like it was his last lifeline, watching his girlfriend sashay straight toward one person.
Adonis. Party king. Lady magnet. Jeff's so-called best friend.
Jeff crushed the plastic cup in his hand like it was Adonis's skull, his eye twitching as he looked up at the platform.
There, in all his one-legged glory, Adonis was swishing around like a drunken ballerina, while a gaggle of girls—hoes, honestly, since half of them had boyfriends—clapped and cheered like he was the second coming of Zeus.
Adonis had everything Jeff didn't—except a family. Functional or not, Jeff still had a mom and dad who occasionally asked about his day.
Adonis was the sole heir of a millionaire, orphaned in a tragic, cinema-style shootout in his mansion.
The kind of shit you only see in action movies, except instead of getting superpowers, Adonis got a playboy complex and a raging addiction to stealing other people's girlfriends.
And now? Now, the bastard was groping Jeff's girlfriend like he was searching for spare change.
Jeff exhaled slowly, shaking his head. This wasn't a devious smirk on his lips—no, this was the smile of a broken man who had accepted the absurdity of his existence.
Meanwhile, Alexa, the supposed love of his life, was already grinding on Adonis like rent was due. She moaned, not-so-subtly, as she pushed her ass deeper into him.
"Easy there, party boy, your best buddy is watching…"
Adonis just grinned, the smug bastard, locking eyes with Jeff through the crowd.
"What's he gonna do? Cry to his mommy? Cough—oh wait."
He smirked, running a hand through his perfectly styled hair.
"Come on, baby, we both know he can't do shit to me."
Alexa giggled, pressing her chest against Adonis like she was trying to absorb his wealth through osmosis.
"And why's that, baby?"
Adonis smirked, the kind of smirk that made men want to punch him and women want to ride him.
"Because I own him. Him and his whole damn family. The only way he could ever pay me back for all the 'help' I gave him… is by killing me. And let's be real, sweetheart—that ain't happening. Now come on, let's enjoy the night."
To make things even worse, Adonis had the audacity—the absolute balls—to point at Jeff and give him a nod, like some kind of VIP shoutout.
Jeff, gripping his squished cup like it was a stress toy for the emotionally betrayed, just sighed and nodded back. Cheers to his public humiliation.
Alexa, meanwhile, was laser-focused on what actually mattered.
"How about you and me slip into the bathroom for some… fun time?"
Of course, she wanted that millionaire dick. Who wouldn't? A rich, pretty boy with abandonment issues and enough money to buy forgiveness.
An orphaned heartbreaker who made it his life mission to steal wives, girlfriends, and probably grandmas just for the thrill of it.
Why? Because deep down, he wanted others to feel his pain.
The loneliness, the emptiness, the void—blah, blah, blah. Alexa didn't give a single shit about his tragic backstory. She wasn't here for the sob story.
She was here for the money.
"N-not now. But after this p-party is over, okay…"
For the first time since meeting the insufferably smooth Adonis, Alexa heard him stammer. She frowned.
Stammering wasn't sexy.
But she let it slide, because, honestly? She already had him wrapped around her perfectly manicured little finger.
Still, she made a point to lean into him more, pressing her body against his like she was trying to merge their souls—or at least their bank accounts.
Meanwhile, poor Jeff stood in the crowd, gripping his cup like a man contemplating arson.
Words could be a real bitch sometimes, and Adonis was about to learn that the hard way.
"Forgive me, brother… but this is the only way to save you… to release you from your curse…"
Jeff murmured the words like a tragic anime protagonist, but Adonis didn't hear him.
He was too busy feeling weird. His vision blurred. His head swam. The lights pulsed like they were trying to hypnotize him into making even worse life choices.
He shook his head, but it didn't help.
"Are yooouuu oookaaayyyy?"
Alexa's voice stretched unnaturally, her face warping like a funhouse mirror.
"Yeeesss, I aaammm oookaaay… iiittt muuusst bee thee edibleeeesss…"
Adonis slurred, blinking like a confused toddler.
And then—boom. Just like that, the self-proclaimed king of the party dropped to his knees.
The boy who had never knelt for anyone—not teachers, not ex-girlfriends, not even the law—was now on his knees in front of a hundred people.
Jeff sipped his drink.
Poetic justice had never tasted so sweet.
Alexa dropped to her knees beside him, laughing so hard she nearly tipped over.
"Man, what did you eat? That shit must be insane!"
She giggled, and Adonis, in his disoriented, chemically compromised state, couldn't help but think,
'Damn, she's pretty… For Jeff, of course. Not me. No way.'
His brain felt like it was made of jelly.
'Man, these edibles are insane…'
He blinked, trying to shake it off, but his vision was doing some next-level Inception shit. The party lights warped, Alexa's thighs stretched and shrunk like they had a mind of their own, and suddenly—bam.
He wasn't at the party anymore.
Instead, he was standing in a massive, blindingly white space.
The kind of place that looked like a high-end psychiatric ward or maybe an Apple Store designed by Satan.
Endless white tiles. Bright, sterile lights beaming from the ceiling.
And the floor? Yeah, it was painted—except the paint was deep, crimson red, splattered around like someone had gone wild with a murder-themed art project.
He blinked again, and—just as suddenly—he was back in the party, the music pounding in his skull like a bad drum solo.
"S-something's not right…"
Adonis muttered, shaking his head like a malfunctioning bobblehead.
"Of course it's not right, dipshit. Maybe next time don't mouth a mystery mushroom like a starving raccoon behind a dumpster."
Jeff's voice cut through the haze.
Adonis snapped his head to the right—bad idea, because the world lagged—and there was Jeff, half-carrying him with one arm slung over his shoulder, the other keeping Alexa from tipping over like a drunk Jenga tower.
"Coming through, people! Make way for a millionaire who's currently orbiting Neptune!"
Jeff barked, shoving past partygoers like a man on a mission.
"Come oooon, Jeff... He just… he just unlocked the future of communication, man! You gotta give him some slaccccckkkkk—"
Alexa slurred, barely holding onto reality herself. Her voice stretched like an old cassette tape, and suddenly—bam—Adonis wasn't at the party anymore.
No flashing lights. No sweaty bodies. No Alexa grinding on him like rent was due.
Now, he was standing on a vast white floor, splattered with red. But this time, it wasn't just random shapes. No, this looked deliberate. Like some horror movie crime scene.
And worse? He wasn't alone.
A hundred men in identical black tuxedos and sunglasses stood around him. Some were groaning on the ground, clutching their ribs like they'd just been wrecked.
Others were barely standing, wobbling like overcooked spaghetti, all staring at him with a mixture of fear and something else.
Like they hadn't anticipated this guy to be able to do this.
Adonis blinked.
'Did I… just beat up a hundred men? While high?'
…Now that was a flex.
Then nearest tuxedoed bastard lunged at him, his fist flying toward Adonis's face like a goddamn missile—
And then—whiplash—Adonis was yanked back to reality.
This time, he wasn't on a battlefield drenched in red. Nope. He was sprawled across a couch, limbs loose and useless like an overcooked noodle.
Alexa stood in front of him, hands on her hips, looking equal parts amused and concerned. Jeff sat nearby, sipping what was probably his drink, the smug bastard.
"Hello? Earth to Adonis? Are you done tripping balls?"
Alexa snapped her fingers in his face, and for some godforsaken reason, Adonis's hands moved on their own. Like his brain and his body had filed for divorce.
Before he could even process what the fuck was happening, his hand latched onto Alexa's head. Not gently, not playfully—just a full-on "grab her by the skull" type of situation.
Alexa blinked, her mouth opening in confusion.
And then—BAM—his brain yoinked him back into the red-splattered void.
Only now, something was… wrong.
Very, very wrong.
Because it wasn't Alexa's soft, shampoo-commercial-worthy hair in his grip anymore. No. It was something firmer. Less sexy, more horrifying.
A well-groomed, very male head with a sunglass. The same head of the tuxedoed man who had rushed him earlier.
The guy was kneeling in front of him.
'What the fuck? Why am I holding a dude's head when I just grabbed Alexa's—oh my fucking GOD—'
And then—before he could finish that thought, before he could even scream—
The guy's head exploded.
Not like a little pop either. Oh no.
Adonis didn't just crush it—he fucking squished it. Like a watermelon under a sledgehammer.
A full, juicy SPLURCH, followed by the warm, wet, absolutely traumatizing sensation of something that used to be a skull sliding through his fingers.
"I don't know what the fuck is happening to my brain, but I swear—"
His own voice echoed, except… it wasn't his voice. It was deeper, rougher, like some ancient warlord had just possessed his body mid-bender.
"—pray to the old and new gods that I won't make it out of here alive, or else I will personally ensure none of your bosses have any balls left to reproduce!"
'EXCUSE ME, WHAT THE FUCK?!'
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Thank you for reading. This will be purely a fun, nonsense of a story filled with degenerate shit (which I know you will like). So if you are looking for something like that, buckle up.