The second Xareth laughed, I knew I had pissed him off and entertained him at the same time.
A dangerous combination.
But before I could throw another insult, some bootlicking noble decided to open his mouth.
"Princess," he said in a fake-ass polite tone, stepping forward. "You should not speak to His Majesty in such a disrespectful manner. It is unwise to anger a king."
I turned to him. A tall, fancy-looking demon with slicked-back horns and an attitude that screamed 'I think I'm important.'
"Oh?" I sneered. "And who the fuck are you?"
He puffed out his chest, clearly thinking he was about to put me in my place. "I am Lord Varyn. A trusted noble of the Demon King."
I blinked. "Never heard of you."
The room snickered.
Varyn's eye twitched, but he kept going. "I am simply giving you friendly advice. You should not raise your voice at His Majesty."
I folded my arms. "And what the fuck are you gonna do if I don't listen? Bore me to death with your ugly-ass voice?"
The demons around us gasped like I had committed a crime.
Even Xareth raised an eyebrow, clearly enjoying the drama.
Varyn's face turned bright red. "I—I am warning you, princess—"
"Bitch, back the fuck off."
The whole room froze.
Varyn looked like I had just slapped him across the face with a dead fish.
I was about to keep insulting him, but then—
SHING.
Something sliced through the air.
For a second, nobody moved.
Then—
Varyn's head slid right the fuck off his neck.
His body stood there for a moment, like it hadn't fully processed the fact that it was now headless.
Then it collapsed.
Silence.
Fucking silence.
I blinked. "Did you just—"
Xareth dusted off his hands like he had just taken out the trash. "He was annoying me."
The other nobles stiffened, looking pale as shit.
I looked down at Varyn's stupid, lifeless head rolling across the floor.
Then back at Xareth.
Then back at the head.
Then back at Xareth.
"…Well, damn."
Xareth smirked. "Still think I'm a manipulative little shit?"
I crossed my arms. "Yes. But now you're a dangerous little shit."
He chuckled, stepping closer. "And yet, you're still standing here, talking to me like I won't do the same to you."
I snorted. "Please. If you wanted me dead, you wouldn't have dressed me up like your fucking twin."
The demons gasped again.
Xareth just laughed.
"Fair point," he admitted. Then he turned to the guards. "Clean this up. And someone take that idiot's head outside before it starts to smell."
The guards rushed to obey.
I just sighed and rubbed my temples.
After that meeting, I locked myself in my room.
Not because I was scared. Fuck no.
But because I needed a fucking break.
I had been kidnapped, dressed up like a royal pet, forced to sit through a meeting full of scheming demons, and watched some dumbass noble get his head chopped off—all in the same fucking day.
I deserved silence.
So I stayed in my room, ignoring everything.
The maids knocked a few times, trying to get me to eat.
"Your Highness, dinner is ready—"
"Fuck off."
"But His Majesty will be—"
"Tell His Majesty to kiss my ass."
They gasped and ran off.
Good.
I didn't need food. I needed to get the fuck out of here.
Hours passed.
The sun set. The castle got quieter.
I stretched out on my massive, ridiculously soft bed, staring at the ceiling, contemplating my life choices.
And then—
BOOM.
The fucking door swung open so hard it nearly flew off the hinges.
I sat up so fast I almost gave myself whiplash.
And there he was.
Xareth.
Standing in my doorway, arms crossed, looking pissed as hell.
The air in the room felt heavier, the shadows on the walls moving like they were alive.
I frowned. "What the fuck is your problem?"
He stepped inside, closing the door with a slow, deliberate push.
"The maids tell me you haven't eaten." His voice was dangerously low.
I scoffed. "And?"
He took another step forward. "And?"
The air got even heavier.
A candle on the bedside table flickered out.
"Do you think this is a game?" he asked, voice still eerily calm. "You think you can just starve yourself in my castle?"
I narrowed my eyes. "Maybe I don't like your demon food."
His lips curled into a deadly smirk. "You'd rather die than eat?"
"Maybe." I shrugged.
Silence.
And then—
He vanished.
Before I could react, he was suddenly in front of me, gripping my chin, forcing me to look up at him.
His touch wasn't harsh, but it was firm. Unyielding.
"You," he murmured, golden eyes glowing, "are either insanely brave or completely fucking stupid."
I smirked. "Both."
His eyes darkened.
Then, without warning, he lifted me off the bed.
"Hey—what the fuck—"
He threw me over his shoulder like I was some ragdoll.
I punched his back. "PUT ME THE FUCK DOWN!"
"No."
"I SWEAR TO GOD—"
"You're eating. Whether you like it or not."
I kicked my legs, but the bastard didn't budge.
The door swung open again, and he marched down the hall with me still fucking over his shoulder.
I groaned, dragging my hands down my face.
"I fucking hate you."
"I know."
I gritted my teeth angrily.
The worst part?
I was actually kinda fucking hungry.