I had to learn the Hardest lesson of my life about love, it's never black and white. There are always other colours you have to consider, I only went in with no experience and I took what the TV has shown made it my truth.
Little did I know that life has a very important lesson to teach me and I wasn't prepared for that lesson. It caught me by surprise.
My name is Elena I am 17 years old turning 18 in a two weeks, in grade 12 older than my friends In the same grade. They started early and I was delayed family issues.
I didnt think I would fall in love at this age, I knew what my goals were and I was fully focused on them.
It was around November that I met this guy on my way back to school, he caught my eye.
I fought the feeling because I am too young to even think of a man like that, but he noticed me like I did.
Our eyes met and connection immediately formed the spark was on 1000 watts and there was no fighting that feeling.
He didn't say anything the first time he saw me but I knew what was happening, he will come back atleast that is what I wished for.
The following day same time after school going home i saw him again. Our eye locked again but it was like he was battling himself to approach me, I didn't do anything but I was disappointed that he didn't say anything at all.
A week went by the same thing kept happening, I even have up because I thought maybe I am the only one who felt it.
We leave on the same street just few houses down my house from his house.
He didn't attend school like we did, he looked young but you could tell he is in his early 20s.
I decided I should let it go there is just nothing there I was just being delutional. I even started avoiding his eyes I didn't want to look desperate to him, he might think I am just loose. I needed to keep my dignity intact so I acted like he never existed.
On Friday when I was on my way home from school with my friends he waved at me, and I waved back he then came over to talk to me.
But I kept walking like I didn't see what he was doing but he did catch up and stopped me.
"Hi, do you mind if I talk to you?" My heart pounding almost out of my chest. But I kept my cool didn't want him to see how nervous I was.
"Hi, sure you can talk to me but you'll have to do it while walking I don't want to be left behind by my friends."
"Ok, my name is Sammy what's yours?"
I smiled then I answered.
"Elena, and nice to meet you Sammy."he smiled like a school girl I knew he was smitten by me and that made me feel superior to him like I have all the cards one mistake I throw him off the bus.
We walked while he tried his best to get me to atleast give him my number, I played a little heart to get with him I didn't want him to think I was desperate for love.
But I ended up giving it to him, when he wanted to give me his number he asked I give him my phone so he can put his number in but with my old ugly phone I told him I didn't have it so I asked he write it on a peace of paper I have him.
It was the beginning of winter and I was starting to get cold and needed to rush home soon as possible.
"Sorry to cut our conversation short but I have to rush home." my friends were far from me that I had to catch up with them.
"Ok, I'll call you tonight and will continue where we left off."he smiled I then rushed off.
My day had turned out a little differently than I had imagined, o thought he will never approach me but I guess the spark I felt between us wasn't all in my head after all.
Elena grew up in an absent family, she was a loner spending most of her time alone at home while her grandmother worked 12 HR shift seven days a week. Her Mom got a new man in her life who she lived with away from her. Her father was not a topic that was brought up in a family meeting or anywhere it was a taboo because of how they got seperated. Her mother wanted nothing to do with that man she didn't care if Elena wanted that relationship with her father she forbade her from mentioning him ever to her. They left her to fend for herself in this world while Thur live their separate lives from her. Her dad married a woman who hated Elena she made sure the never bonded as father and daughter and she leaned to live with her issues and never complained once about that.
Her mom got to see her every other weekend, most of the time she was living her life without her.
Once she got home she kicked off the shoes, boiled her bathing water on the stove. Went out to grab the bathing tab since they didn't have bathrooms in the house, toilets were built outside the houses in their community. Only those who were financially prevaladged had big houses that had built in bathrooms and showers.
She had her bath did her homework and cooked dinner and when she was done it was around 8 her grandmother arrived already around 7 and they had dinner at that time.
She was exhausted and was about to sleep when her phone rang and she picked up.
"Hi Elena,it's Sammy I wanted to say goodnight I know you might be preparing for bed by now.?" I smiled just being a girl who's infatuated my a new man.
"Yeah,just done with my homework and in bed sleepy."
There was a long silence before he spoke again. I understand we still getting to know each other an I ma not much of a talker
"Ok, then I'll call again tomorrow,maybe in the morning if I have time."
"Sure, goodnight to you too, it felt good saying that to him made me blush.
She then hang up the phone then snuggled in her warm blankets winter was brutal, she hated the cold she is more of a summer girl, winter makes her feel depressed. Because she didn't own enough warm clothes for winter and she didn't even own school tracksuits she has to wear her uniform she uses in summer and didn't even own a pair of leggings to keep her warm.
She was just forgotten and she didn't complain she worked with what she had. Her Mom would tell her that they had no money and her granny didn't earn enough to buy things in the middle of the year only once a year in December and after that nothing till the next December
Uniform she got from hand me downs when other parents buy their kids clothes, she didn't even afford pads and at the time where were no programs at school that offered. Do she had to use what she can, am not going to mention what your imagination will take care of that part for me. She had it tough but her smile never faded