My name was Keil Graywood. A 22 years old virgin. And I was fucked and cooked.
"Okay, what the fuck was that?" I asked no one.
I walked over to the corpse of the giant snake and stared at it. Its head was completely gone, having exploded when I punched it.
"I should be dead," I murmured. "Or at least severely injured."
How the hell did I do that?
I had never been athletic. Hell, I'd barely been able to pass gym class in high school.
And now, I was beating up giant snakes with my bare hands.
"Magic, probably," I muttered.
That was the obvious answer.
"But how?"
I looked down at my hands. They seemed ordinary, if a bit bloody.
"I don't have any special powers," I said. "Unless the power is 'be really good at punching things.'"
I laughed, a bit hysterically.
"I guess that would be a pretty useful power."
"I just hope I don't turn bald."
It was a reference to a famous manga character, and it helped me calm down a little.
I looked at the dead snake again.
"Well, whatever the reason, I guess I should be thankful."
The thing had been trying to eat me, after all.
I shook my head.
"This is insane."
I needed to get out of here, find some clothes, and figure out what the hell was going on.
I walked for a few hours, my naked body becoming scratched and battered from the undergrowth. The sun was beginning to set, and the forest was getting dark.
"Come on," I muttered. "Where is civilization?"
I hadn't seen anything that resembled a town or a village.
Maybe I'm in a survival scenario, I thought. That would make sense.
But then, why was I naked?
It was a frustrating question.
Suddenly, a light appeared ahead of me.
"Finally," I said, relieved.
I hurried towards the light, and as I got closer, I could see that it was coming from a window in a small cabin.
I sighed, relieved.
"Thank god."
The cabin was small, with a thatched roof and walls made of rough-hewn logs. The light was coming from a window that was covered by a thick fur pelt.
I knocked on the door.
"Hello?"
There was no answer.
"Hello? Is anyone there?"
I pushed open the door and peered inside.
"Hello?"
The cabin was empty. There was a small table, a couple of chairs, and a fireplace. A pot hung over the fire, and there was a loaf of bread on the table.
"Well, this is convenient," I said.
I stepped inside, closing the door behind me.
"Running around the forest naked, huh? People have weird hobbies these days, I see."
A woman's voice came from the darkness, making me jump.
"Who's there?" she asked.
I whirled around, my heart racing.
"Who are you?"
A woman emerged from the shadows, her face hidden in the gloom. She was tall, with long black hair and white skin.
"My name is Sariel," she said. "Who are you?"
She stepped closer, and I could see that she was wearing a tight black dress, with a plunging neckline and a slit up the side.
"I'm Keil," I said, a little breathlessly.
Sariel was beautiful, with dark eyes and red lips. She was the kind of woman that would have been out of my league back on Earth.
"Keil," Sariel repeated. "What are you doing here?"
"I don't know," I said honestly.
"You don't know?"
"No," I said. "I woke up in a clearing in the woods, and I've been wandering around ever since."
"A clearing in the woods?" Sariel asked, her voice tinged with disbelief. "Why are you naked, then?"
"I don't know," I repeated.
"You keep saying that," Sariel said, her voice growing impatient.
"I'm sorry," I said. "I'm a little confused right now."
"So I can see."
Sariel looked at me for a moment, then sighed.
"All right," she said. "Let's start with something simple. What's the last thing you remember?"
"I was in a car accident," I said. "A truck ran a red light and t-boned my car. I flipped over, and the car caught fire. Then, everything went black."
Sariel's eyes widened.
"And then I woke up in the forest," I said.
Sariel was silent for a moment, then she nodded.
"Very well," she said. "It seems you're telling the truth."
"I am," I said. "I'm not sure why you would doubt me."
Sariel smiled wryly.
"There are many reasons to doubt someone in the Wilderlands," she said.
"I am still naked," I reminded her.
"Yes, you are," Sariel said.
"Are there any clothes I could borrow?" I asked.
"I'm afraid not," Sariel said. "But the water in the stream is warm, and there is soap and towels in the cabin."
"Thank you," I said.
Sariel gestured towards a doorway.
"The stream is that way," she said.
"Great," I said.
"You should hurry," Sariel said. "The forest is dangerous at night."
"I know," I said. "I already met a giant snake."
Sariel arched an eyebrow.
"Did you now?"
"Yeah," I said. "It was trying to eat me."
"What did you do?"
"I punched it in the head."
"And?"
"It died," I said.
Sariel's eyes widened, then she started laughing.
"Oh, wow," she said. "That's amazing."
I smiled sheepishly.
"I guess so," I said.
"Well," Sariel said, recovering her composure.
She didn't buy it.
"I suppose you should get cleaned up," she said.
"Thank you," I said.
I headed for the stream, feeling Sariel's eyes on me.
***
As I washed the grime and gore off of me, I couldn't help but think about how lucky I was.
If I had been in a typical Isekai world, I would have been reincarnated as a child. Then, I would have gone through a series of trials and tribulations before eventually becoming a powerful hero.
But here, it seemed, the rules were different.
"I'm not sure what's going on," I muttered, "but I'll take it."
I had woken up in the body of an adult man, and I had immediately gotten into a fight.
Maybe this world was more like the isekai web novels I'd read than I thought.
"I might actually be a badass in this world."
Of course, the first thing to do would be to get some clothes.
And maybe some answers.
As I washed, I noticed that the scratches on my body were healing quickly. It was as if they were being healed by magic.
"Wow," I murmured.
That was handy.
After washing the dirt and gore off, I returned to the cabin. Sariel was waiting for me.
"Hey," I said.
"You look better," Sariel observed.
"Thanks," I said. "You're still beautiful."
"I know," Sariel said, her voice flat.
She threw a blanket at me.
"Cover yourself," she said.
I wrapped the blanket around my waist.
"Better?"
"A little," Sariel said.
She sat down at the table and gestured for me to sit opposite her.
Time for me to ask questions, I thought.
"What is this place?" I asked.
"It's a cabin in the forest," Sariel said.
"Smart-ass," I muttered.
"This is the Wilderlands," Sariel said, ignoring me.
"What are the Wilderlands?"
"It's a region of the world, north of the human kingdoms."
"The human kingdoms?"
"There are several human kingdoms in the world," Sariel explained.
"Are there other races?"
"Of course," Sariel said. "The elves, the dwarves, the goblins, the orcs, the kobolds, the fae..."
"Wow," I said.
It was just like a fantasy world.
"Are there dragons?"
"Yes," Sariel said, sounding amused. "There are dragons."
"Have you ever seen one?"
"No," Sariel said. "I haven't. But I know people who have."
"Wow," I breathed.
This was so cool.
"So, you're a human?"
"I am," Sariel said. "I am an adventurer."
"An adventurer?"
"Yes," Sariel said, leaning forward.
She had a glint in her eyes.
"I hunt monsters and explore dungeons," she said.
"That's awesome."
"It is," Sariel said. "And tonight, you're going to help me."
"Me?"
"Yes, you."
"Why me?"
"Because you have a strong body and a weak mind," Sariel said, looking me up and down.
"Ouch."
"Besides, you killed a serpentkin, which is no small feat."
"A what?"
"A serpentkin," Sariel repeated. "That giant snake you fought."
"Oh," I said. "Right."
"We'll talk more later," Sariel said. "Eat."
She handed me a bowl of stew and a chunk of bread.
"Thank you," I said.
As we ate, Sariel told me about the Wilderlands. She told me about the human kingdoms, the elves, the dwarves, the goblins, the orcs, the kobolds, the fae, the dragons, and the monsters.
"What's the biggest threat to the humans right now?" I asked.
"Probably the orcs," Sariel said. "They have a powerful empire and are always looking to expand their territory."
"Cool."
"Not cool," Sariel corrected.
"Right," I said. "Sorry."
"Do you have any more questions?" Sariel asked.
"Will you pay me for helping you? This isn't a volunteer gig, is it?"
"Pay you?"
"Yeah," I said. "For my services."
"Services?"
"Yes," I said. "I'm an experienced fighter."
"Are you now?"
"Yes," I said.
I couldn't exactly tell her that I had never fought anything in my life.
"Hmmm," Sariel said.
Her eyes narrowed.
"All right," she said. "Fine."
"Really?"
"Yes," Sariel said.
"Good."
"But first, we have to test you," Sariel said.
"What do you mean, test me?"
"To make sure you're worthy of payment."
"I thought I already passed the test."
"No," Sariel said.
She stood up.
"You have to fight me," she said.
"What?"
"It's the only way to know if you're worthy," Sariel said.
"But..."
"What are you afraid of?"
"Nothing," I said.
"Then fight me."
I took a deep breath.
"All right," I said. "I'll fight you."
"Good," Sariel said.
"But..."
"But what?"
"I'm not going to try to hurt you."
Sariel smiled.
"You're a strange man, Keil," she said.
"So, do we just start fighting?"
"We do," Sariel said.
I was not looking forward to this.
"Come on, then," Sariel said.
She raised her fists, and we began circling each other.
"Are you ready?" Sariel asked.
"Yes," I lied.
I was not ready.
Sariel threw a punch, and I barely managed to block it.
"Nice," Sariel said.
"Thanks," I grunted.
"You're not as strong as I thought," Sariel taunted.
"I'm just getting started," I said.
Sariel kicked, and her foot caught me in the ribs.
"Oof," I gasped.
"Are you sure?" Sariel asked.
I glared at her.
"Yes," I said.
I wasn't going to let her get to me.
I threw a punch, but before it reached her I stopped...
It created a fucking shock that shook the cabin—a fucking shockwave wave.
"Holy shit!"
Sariel stared at me, her eyes wide.
"What did you do?" she asked.
"I don't know," I panted.
"How did you do that?"
"I don't know," I admitted.
"Well, whatever you did, it didn't hurt me."
"I didn't want to hurt you," I said.
"You passed. Let's hunt some white wolves!"
"White wolves?"
"Yes," Sariel said.
"What do you want with white wolves?"
"We're going to sell their furs," Sariel said.
"Okay," I said.
I didn't see the harm in that.
"When do we leave?"
"Now," Sariel said.
"Wait a minute," I said.
"What?"
"Don't you have any clothes for me?"
"Oh," Sariel said.
She grinned mischievously.
"No," she said. "You'll have to fight the white wolves naked."
"But..."
"If you die, I'll take your blanket," Sariel said.
I was starting to think that she enjoyed watching my dong wave around.
"Fine," I said.
"Don't worry," Sariel said.
"How can I not worry when I'm naked and you're not?"
"You're a big, strong man," Sariel said.
She looked me up and down.
"And those wolves are no match for you."
I wasn't so sure about that, but I didn't want to argue with her.