I have lost all sense of time, I no longer know if it is day or night and the dark, dusty room makes my limbs numb and my nostrils itch. I no longer feel hungry or thirsty, I eat the slice of bread and the glass of water brought to me twice a day because I must live.
I don't know how many hours I sleep, whether I go to sleep or wake up, the room is still darker than the night itself, but that's okay, my eyes got used to the darkness eight dreams ago. That's when I realized that my mother, who kept me company in this cold hell, had never opened her eyes again, let alone addressed me. In the first ten dreams she was always clinging to me, hugging me and telling me she was sorry for what I was going through, shedding her wet tears on my cheeks. After that she started sleeping more and talking less, until it got to the point where she wouldn't get up from the rusty mattress lying near the corner of the room. I already know that mom is not coming back, that she went far away from me, and even knowing that, tears do not come to my eyes. Several dreams ago I stopped feeling things, be it sadness or boredom, hunger or thirst, I only know that I must not close my eyes for a long period of time, otherwise, I will end up like mom.
I don't know what time it is or what day it is, I only know that I must remember my name, the one that my mother chose with so much enthusiasm and affection, saying that she chose it by looking at my eyes, which resembled ashes, the ones from which the phoenix is reborn when it dies. She always commented that no matter how many times I fell, I should be reborn as a phoenix and move on. But mom didn't wake up, she didn't come back as the phoenix, and now the room feels colder and lonelier than I ever thought it would.
My name is Neil, mom said I'm eight years old, though now I don't know how long it's been. My purpose is to get out of this room, to find those who hurt us and accused us without evidence, dragging me and my mother out of our home and then working my mother inhumanly to exhaustion just to lock us up in this dark prison. I must remember my name, it is the only thing I keep from my mother, I must get out of this room, I must find the lord of the house, who could have done something and left my mother and me to rot even though he was the one who had dragged us here. The way he treated her and talked to her was not like the other people in town, who were always kind to mother, like mother was to them, that man was different, he did not seem like a person who wanted to help mother, it was as if he wanted to hide mother, hide her away from the rest of the people, hide both of us.
When we arrived at the big castle, many people greeted us at the entrance. They all bowed in the presence of that man, who was dragging mother by the arm. When the large doors opened, a woman wearing an elegant garment and accompanied by two other children, one of whom, the boy who was taller than me and looked to be about 14 years old, grabbed the hand of the smaller girl next to him, who was no more than 10 years old, while they looked at us with contempt. The woman glared at my mother, who was looking at the ground with fear and discomfort. That seemed to anger the woman more, who started yelling at her and then hit her cheek, leaving a red mark on it. Meanwhile, the well-dressed man sighed and the little children laughed, none of them showing any intention of intervening in the act. That made my blood boil, we were dragged here against our will only to receive a lousy treatment as soon as we arrived. After all, it seems that all those rumors about the nobles were true, their arrogance and impatience at the time of discussions or things that did not suit them had no limits.
The man called someone else, a man who looked to be about the same age as him, wearing glasses, followed by another small boy, who was shyly hiding behind his legs. Noticing this, the man seemed to be annoyed, scolding the one they called the butler, who did not hesitate to bow his head and beg for mercy for his son's actions. When he finished, the man sighed, instructing the butler to take us to a room on the first floor of the castle, which they called a mansion.
There was an old bed and a small table on which rested a worn candle. Mama turned to the butler.
"Thank you for showing them the way, Mr. Butler," said my mother, kind as always.
"Don't worry, ma'am, after all, it's my job. Even so, please excuse Alden, my son, he has come to learn so he can succeed me someday, but he has always been very shy," she said as she turned again to see the brown boy whose eyes were hidden behind large round glasses while his mouth twisted, revealing the mole that rested on the left corner of his lip.
"Don't worry, I understand what children are like. My little Neil doesn't talk much either, nor did he have any friends, maybe they could play from time to time."
The butler, who seemed to understand my mother's worries, smiled slightly.
"Of course, ma'am. The children can play whenever they want. Alden could use a friend to talk to, which I can imagine is the same for young Neil," added the butler with a pleasant smile.
"Don't hesitate to contact me if you have any problems at the mansion, I understand that your stay here can be complicated," he said with concern.
"Neil, why don't you go play with your new friend while mommy does some things," he mentioned as he squatted down next to me, caressing his hand against my cheek.
"Well,okay". That was the first answer that popped into my head. I could tell Mom wasn't having a good time, I wanted to stay and help her, but I didn't know how. Maybe giving her some space was the right choice right now.
Following my mother's recommendations, I followed Alden around the yard as he showed me the stables of the mansion. The stable was larger in size than any house I had seen before in the village. Inside, there were horses of all colors and heights, breeds and looks. Alden continued to show me around nicely, explaining everything he perceived that I didn't understand what it was for, always being patient and pleasant.
"Why are you so nice to a stranger," I couldn't help but ask. It was evident that he was from a different social class than me, and yet he remained friendly and formal with someone like me.
"You don't like my attitude, young master? If you don't like it, I can change it, just tell me", he tried to explain with a hint of nervousness as he repositioned his glasses properly.
Before he could answer, a well-dressed girl accompanied by what appeared to be a maid entered the stable, her face showing little desire for a cheerful dialogue.
"How can you call that lineage dirty young master, you dare to put us in the same position," replied the girl with a whimsical tone as she came closer and closer to where we stood.
"I did not mean to offend the young lady-"
"Be quiet, butler's son! I'll show you the indisputable difference between me and this rat!"
After looking at me as if I were an insect in her beautiful garden, with a wave of her hand the maid approached me, and with a slap on the cheek knocked me to the ground, making me roll a couple of meters on the dirty floor of the stable.
I stood up slightly dazed, my head was spinning and I could notice a hot liquid sliding down the corner of my lips followed by the taste of iron in my mouth. A few seconds later, drops of blood were falling from my mouth as I tried to stand up again, which action was impossible due to a direct blow to my stomach, making me crash into a nearby wall. My vision began to blur, in the background, I could faintly make out that arrogant girl laughing happily and Alden approaching worriedly towards where I was lying, pronouncing words incomprehensible to me.
When I opened my eyes again it was already night and my aching body was resting on a pile of straw. I felt pangs in my stomach and mouth. Seeing that I had opened my eyes, Alden rushed with a worried face towards me with tears in his eyes.
"I'm sorry young master, I'm sorry all this happened to you," he stammered as thin tears rolled down his cheeks.
"If you're so sorry, stop calling me that, and stop crying for someone you just met. If you keep this up you'll run out of water in your body if you cry over every bad thing that happens to a stranger."
Alden didn't respond, just nodded his head as he whimpered silently. With his help, I managed to get to my feet again, thus returning both of us to the room my mother had received.
"Alden, when we get to the room my mother will ask questions. Your answer must be that I fell."
Alden, who seemed surprised and didn't quite understand my request, asked in bewilderment, "Why not just tell the lady the truth?"
"My mother has enough to worry about already. Adding a cause that she can't fix even if she wants to will only bring her more discomfort."
Alden, who looked at me with understanding and sadness, nodded without asking any more questions.
Upon arrival, the surprise on my mother's face was not lacking, however, thanks to Alden's testimony we were able to calm my mother down.
I could observe Alden's nervous face, which gave away that he had never lied before. It was a surprise that my mother did not find out what really happened, maybe that good boy face gave him a special ability at the moment of telling unbelievable lies.
After Alden left the room and closed the door behind him, my mother knelt down next to me, hugging me tightly as her arms trembled as she held me, possibly it was a big scare for her to see me arrive all bruised when I had gone for a walk by myself.
"I'm sorry for scaring you mom, I'll be more careful from now on" I said trying to calm her down.
"Please, just stay safe and sound, mom will take care of everything, yes?" she said forcing a smile, her eyes turning crystal clear, indicating that she was on the verge of tears.
The next few weeks passed quietly. Mama went out every morning to work around the mansion and I spent much of the time in the bedroom or sometimes hiding in a secret corner of the courtyard that was away from the eyes of the mansion's inhabitants. It was a great pity that this pleasant peace did not last much longer, giving way to the storm.
Shouts could be heard from the room. Bewildered, I got up and headed for the door, slipping quietly down the hallway to discover the reason for the commotion so early in the morning.
As I watched what was happening my blood ran cold. Mama was on the floor while the lady of the house was pulling hard on her hair and screaming, which brought more eyes to see the violent scene.
"You dare to steal my jewelry, you dirty woman! I've been tolerating you for weeks, but this has gone too far," the woman shouted angrily as she pulled my mother's hair.
Nearby, the young lady of the house laughed in amusement, this had definitely been her doing, it seems that what I received yesterday was not enough for her.
This time, impulsiveness won out over my calm personality, which prefers to stay and observe the situation.
I ran to where my mother was, humiliating myself and begging for mercy, even though I knew that neither of us was guilty of that robbery.
"Insolent pests, lock them in the attic and only give them the food they need to stay alive!
After giving the order, two men in armor approached us, dragging us again against our will towards an unknown part of the mansion.
Not far away I could see Alden, who was watching the scene in horror next to his father.
As I was being dragged by a lock of my jet hair, we passed by the young lady of the house, who with a huge smile whispered in my ear.
"Know your place, you pest.
"No, please, have mercy for the boy, he didn't do anything, he is a very good boy," my mother begged between tears and cries. No matter how much she begged, those men did not stop, dragging us to the attic as their mistress had ordered.
Upon arrival, the men in armor opened an old wooden door that was locked. Inside, an old mattress could be made out in the dark room, which lacked a window or any kind of light.
We were thrown inside, subsequently locking the door. I could feel my mother's hands searching for me in the darkness. Her whole body was trembling and her tears were again wetting my cheeks as she sobbed as she felt what was happening and that everything was going to be okay.
But nothing ended well in the end.
My mother left me alone in this hell, a hell that I will get out of even if it is necessary to tear out my soul and eat it again. All those who hurt us will pay, no matter if it's months, years or even decades, I will repay them for the pain felt with interest, even if it's the last thing I do.