Part 1: Going Back in Time
Seth
I wish I could go back in time. Where you were still there.
I stood still, staring at the tombstone in front of me. My body felt numb because of the sudden downpour of the rain. The cold waters send chills through my skin and only the sound of the it can only be heard. It felt like the sky understood what I was feeling right now.
"This is harder than I thought it'd be." I thought to myself. It took me a while to finally muster up my strength to finally speak.
"It's been so long, Ivan." I said trying to speak towards the person buried beneath the grave that I'm visiting right now. "Sorry that I only got to visit you just now." To be honest, I never wanted to be here right now because I still can't accept the fact that you're already gone.
I closed my eyes as I looked up towards the sky. Trying to hide the tears that suddenly escaped from my eyes from reminiscing the times we spent in our final year in high school. Before the accident occurred that resulted in his death. Our graduation was about a week after the field trip, and we were just enjoying the time we had until then. But on the way back home, the bus we were on suddenly got into an accident resulting on Ivan's untimely death. It was so sudden. Until now, it pains me so much. We had things planned for our future but it was already gone.
"Why did you have to leave me first?" I managed between sobs. "Why did you abandon me? We had so many plans together, and now it's all gone." My words trembled as the biting rain took its toll on me.
I told him everything that have been holed up in my heart. Crying, as I tell him stories of how it was so hard to live after the accident that it even gave me a trauma. How hard it was to forget the day we should've been enjoying ourselves but only gave us so much pain in the end.
"I wish you were here." I whispered. "I'm pathetic right? Making a wish that would never come true, as you are now gone." I spoke. "But still, I wish you happiness in your journey in the afterlife." I smiled bitterly, finally accepting the fact that he's already gone. Finally letting go.
I wiped the tears from my cheeks as I felt the rain slowly fading. I then smiled one last time, genuinely. "I'll see you soon, alright?" I said out of the blue before walking away, feeling like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
A while after I left the cemetery, I stayed at a nearby bus station to wait for a friend that will drive me back to my place. The rain already stopped, and countless people are already passing by like leaves falling off of a tree.
I was quietly going about my day when a man in his mid-thirties unexpectedly took a seat beside me and asked, "Are you alright?"
I didn't want to respond, but then somehow my mouth just took control, and I blurted out, "Clearly, I'm not doing well now, but I hope things will get better in the future."
After a brief pause, he mumbled, "Losing someone is never easy." I responded with a bitter smile, "It never is." Then, reaching into his bag, he pulled something out and offered it to me. "Take this. It's a keepsake. I don't know what happened, but I hope everything will be alright" he said.
I was so stunned that I couldn't speak; I just watched him walk away, clutching the old pocket watch he had given me. I only snapped back to reality when Travis called my name.
"Seth!" he exclaimed. "Are you alright?" he asked with genuine concern, scrutinizing me from head to toe. I nodded in response, "I'm just a little tired, that's all." I responded.
"Alright, if you're okay, let's leave now, or you'll catch a cold." He said and I followed him to his car and climbed in. He drove me back to my old home.
During the ride, I gazed out the windows, feeling nostalgic as I took in the passing scenery. So much had changed since I left two years ago, and a small smile crept onto my face.
"So, how was your trip to the city?" Travis asked.
"It's fine." I replied shortly.
"Will you be staying until the holidays?" Travis asked, noting the season was approaching.
"I'm not sure." I admitted. "I just need to rest for a bit before heading back—I have a lot to do for my studies."
Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of concern in his expression. Before he could say anything, I cut him off. "I'll be fine, Travis." I said firmly. I didn't want anyone worrying about me anymore.
He simply nodded, backing off. That was just the kind of person he was—someone who respected your choices without question. It's what made him such a great friend to all of us.
After a while, we finally arrived at my home—or rather, the place I used to live. We stepped out of the car and walked inside.
"Do you want some coffee?" I offered.
"It's fine. I've got some errands to run, so I'll be off now." Travis said before turning back toward his car.
"Thanks for the ride, Travis!" I called out before he could drive away.
Stepping into the house, I found my mom in the living room, sitting on the couch with her eyes closed, seemingly asleep. I walked over quietly and wrapped my arms around her. The moment I did, she stirred awake.
"Seth, you're here," she murmured, still a bit drowsy.
I let out a small chuckle. "You should head to your room now, Mom." I suggested. "I'll be resting in mine too."
"Alright," she mumbled. "But make sure to shower first before bed. Sleeping in damp clothes will only make you sick."
I nodded, and we both headed to our rooms. After taking a shower and changing into my pajamas, I finally settled in to rest. Sitting on the edge of my bed, I lingered for a moment before my thoughts drifted to the old pocket watch I had received from the gentleman earlier.
Reaching into the pocket of the pants I had worn, I pulled it out and placed it on the study table beside my bed, deciding to take a closer look at it tomorrow. That's when my eyes landed on an old notebook—the one I used to write my diary in. Without thinking, I sat down and began flipping through the pages, reading the words of my past self.
Every entry in the diary was about him. The moments we spent at the nearby café, sharing snacks. The late nights at karaoke with friends after class. The memories of us navigating high school together, all the way to graduation. Every page was filled with laughter and joy—our time together captured in ink. But when I reached the last page, there was only a single sentence written on it.
"I wish I could go back in time."
It was the shortest entry I had ever written.
I had written it on the day of his funeral—a funeral I never attended. Instead, I locked myself in my room, crying, convincing myself it was just a bad dream. But it wasn't. I was too afraid to accept that he was truly gone. That's why I only found the strength to visit his grave today.
I let out a sigh, closing my old diary before placing the pocket watch on top of it. Exhaustion weighed heavily on me, and before I knew it, sleep took over.
For the first time since the accident, I slept peacefully.
What I didn't know was what tomorrow would bring when I woke up.
**********
I woke up to the sound of my mom shouting—so loud that it felt like my ears were about to explode.
"Seth!" she called again. "Didn't you say you were going shopping for school supplies with Ivan today?"
Her words made me spring out of bed.
I quickly grabbed my phone from the bedside table, but as I checked the date, my breath caught in my throat—I had gone back in time.
Rushing to the bathroom, I stared at my reflection in the mirror. It was me, but not as I had been yesterday. This was how I looked back when we were just starting our senior year.
"This can't be real." I murmured, still in disbelief.
To prove it was just a dream, I pinched myself—only to wince at the sharp pain.
I took a deep breath, still trying to process the situation.
Then, I suddenly remembered—the old pocket watch the gentleman had given me. Without hesitation, I ran to my bedside table, searching for it. And there it was, right where I had left it, along with my worn-out diary.
Grabbing the watch, I examined it closely. The only thing unusual was that it had stopped—frozen at the exact time I had gone to bed last night.
I flipped through the pages of my diary. Every entry was still there. Even the ones that, as of today, hadn't happened yet.
I gasped. I really came back in time.
But why? What brought me here?
Then, a realization hit me—I remembered the last words I had written in my diary.
"I wish I could go back in time."
"My wish…" I murmured. "It came true."
My heart pounded wildly in my chest. I had never expected something like this to actually happen.
"Seth!" my mom called again as she stepped into my room. "Get ready—Ivan's already downstairs waiting for you."
I took a deep breath, forcing myself to stay calm. "I'll take a quick shower first, Mom. Let him know I'll be down soon."
She gave me a simple nod before leaving, and I hurried to get ready.
My hands trembled slightly as I prepared to go out. The thought of seeing Ivan again after all this time sent a wave of nerves through me.
Still, just thinking about him made my chest tighten with an ache I couldn't ignore.
But this time, I had been given a chance—a chance to change his fate. No matter what, I would do everything in my power to keep him safe.
After finishing my shower, I wrapped myself in a towel and stepped out of the bathroom.
But the moment I did, I froze. Someone was sitting on the edge of my bed.
My heart lurched. "What are you doing here?" I exclaimed, startled.
"Your mom let me in," he replied, looking just as surprised as I was.
Flustered, I quickly grabbed some clothes to change into. "I told her I'd come down after my shower, but of course, she didn't listen," I muttered in frustration.
I had imagined the moment I'd see him again countless times—but not like this. Never did I expect to walk out of the bathroom, wrapped in only a towel, only to find him sitting comfortably on the edge of my bed.
"Sorry," he said suddenly, his voice firm but sincere. The air around him grew heavy.
I paused for a moment. He was still the same—calm and composed, but always carrying more on his shoulders than he let on.
I sighed. "There's nothing to apologize for," I reassured him. "I was just caught off guard. It was my fault for shouting. I'm sorry."
His expression eased, the tension lifting from his face. I smiled.
Once I finished getting ready, we headed out, knowing we still had to commute to the nearest mall. The moment we stepped outside, the heat hit us—the sun was blazing, and there wasn't a cloud in sight. But I knew that wouldn't last. If my memory was right, it would rain in the afternoon. Just to be safe, I grabbed an umbrella.
We arrived at the mall without any trouble. As expected on a weekend, the place was buzzing with people—shoppers, families, and groups of friends out to enjoy their day.
"Once we grab everything we need, we'll meet up with the others," I said, checking my phone. Travis had just messaged me, letting me know they were already here.
"Alright," Ivan replied casually.
I sighed before grabbing his arm and pulling him into one of the stores, determined to get everything done quickly. Unlike when we first met in high school, Ivan wasn't the type to keep to himself anymore. Back then, he had always been surrounded by people, effortlessly blending in with different groups. He was outgoing but never too loud, confident but never overbearing. Still, there were moments when he'd grow quiet, lost in thought.
I sometimes wished I could bring out that lively side of him more often. Even when I tried to strike up conversations about things I knew interested him, he'd only respond briefly before shifting the topic back to me. To others, he might have seemed a little distant, but I knew better. Beneath that composed and laid-back exterior, he was a genuinely kind person.
I remembered one time, on our way home, when we stumbled upon a stray cat. Without hesitation, Ivan knelt down, gently stroking its fur with surprising tenderness. When I suggested he take it home, he only shook his head, saying his house didn't allow pets. Even though I could tell he wanted to, he couldn't.
So, I took the cat home instead. Back then, it was just a tiny thing—but now, it had grown bigger and much chubbier. I named it Gray, after its fur, and whenever Ivan came over, he would always make time to play with it.
"I've got everything I need," I muttered, glancing at my bag. "What about you, Ivan?"
"Yeah, I'm good," he said with a relaxed grin.
"Alright, let's go pay at the cashier. I'll just message the others and let them know we'll be there soon," I told him as we made our way to the checkout.
After leaving the shop, we made our way to the café where we usually met up with the others. The moment we sat down at their table, Travis greeted us with a grin.
"It's been a while, Seth. Ivan."
"Yeah," I nodded. "You were on vacation until yesterday, right?"
Travis let out a frustrated sigh. "I wish I hadn't gone, but my parents wouldn't let me stay home for the summer."
I chuckled. Same old Travis. "At least you got to travel. Unlike us, who were stuck at home the whole time," I muttered.
"Alright, enough about that," James cut in. "Any updates on our class assignments this year?"
Travis smirked. "We're all still in the same class, James. Unless, of course, you failed last year—then you'd have another year before graduating."
"I didn't fail!" James shot back, clearly offended. "I just got a lower score on the final exam than usual, that's all!"
That only made everyone burst into laughter—everyone except Ivan. He was staring at me, his expression unreadable.
Curious, I turned to him. "Something wrong?"
He simply shook his head, dismissing my concern.
I smiled and ruffled his hair before turning back to the others. Then, something caught my attention.
"Wait a second… this place didn't have a stage before, right?" I asked, my brows furrowing. The thought had just hit me. This café only added a stage about a month after our classes started. I clearly remembered that day—we even had the chance to perform in front of everyone when they first opened it up for public use.
"Yeah, maybe the owner had it built over the summer," James suggested.
Just then, a middle-aged man approached our table.
"That's right!" he said enthusiastically. "And the stage is open to the public. You're free to sing or play any of the instruments whenever you'd like."
James' eyes sparkled with excitement. "Seriously?" he asked eagerly.
The man chuckled. "Of course. Why would I lie? It's just a little change to make this place livelier," he said with a warm smile.
That's when it hit me. This man—he was the one who gave me the old pocket watch.
I was about to speak to him when his phone suddenly rang. He excused himself politely and stepped away to take the call. Before I could even process anything, James grabbed my wrist and dragged me toward the stage.
"What are you doing?" I asked, startled.
He only grinned and handed me the microphone that had been resting on the side. "Come on, Seth. Show them what you've got," he said, mischief dancing in his eyes.
I sighed in defeat, knowing there was no way out of this. Gripping the microphone, I turned to face the café full of people.
"Uh, hey, everyone," I started, my voice steady but lighthearted. "Sorry for the sudden interruption, but someone decided to pull me up here without warning." I gestured toward James, who was tuning the guitar, earning a few chuckles from the audience.
"I hope you'll listen and enjoy," I added, my gaze drifting toward our table—towards Ivan.
With my signal, James strummed the first chord, and a soothing melody filled the café. Closing my eyes, I let the music guide me, singing from the depths of my heart. Every now and then, I stole glances at our table, hoping—just hoping—that Ivan could feel what I was trying to say through my voice.
That day was one of the happiest I could have ever imagined—the day I finally got to see his smile again.