Closing the door to his office behind him, Apollo lowered his head and waited, paying attention to the sound of footsteps growing distant. Once he could no longer hear them, he breathed deeply.
"Hah, hah, hah." His chest heaved, desperate for air, like he had run a marathon around the city. The only sound in the room was his laboured breath… but soon it changed. "Hah, heh, haeh, haha!"
A smile split his flushed face, and he raised his hands to cover it, the laughter spilling through his fingers. "Haha, heh, hahaha!"
Soon he couldn't hold it back, uproarious laughter filled his office, his joy spilling all over unbidden.
To think that a mortal like that existed! So bright! So pure! So beautiful! Someone that could look a god in the eyes and threaten them!
Astraea, you lucky bitch! Where did she find him? When? And why wasn't he his?
That glow of his, it belonged to him. He is the God of Light!
He gritted his teeth, his laughter stopping as plans formed haphazardly in his mind. Half-formed courses of action mixed with lurid fantasies of how he would enjoy his newest conquest rushed though his mind, and Apollo felt himself harden.
Shirou Emiya, he would be Apollo's soon.
He would make sure of it, even if he had to pry him from Astraea's dead hands.
There was a clinking of glass and Apollo looked up, almost startled. Who?!
"My, how unsightly." A soft voice broke him out of his spell, his mind recalling the events of not even an hour ago. "Even your children would be disgusted if they saw you just now, Apollo."
Apollo sighed, trying to show a modicum of calmness he was not feeling. "Which is why I am in the privacy of my sanctum." He straightened his robes, swept his hair back into order, and turned to see his uninvited- yet very opportune and welcomed- guest. "I see you decided to help yourself while awaiting for my return, Freya."
Freya just smiled guilelessly, sitting on his chair, one hand playing with one of her silver locks, and the other… The other held a cup of his most expensive wine, the uncorked bottle sitting halfway empty on his desk.
"Didn't you say 'make yourself at home' when you left to handle those dreadful affairs of yours?" She swirled the wine for a moment and then sniffed it. "It does not really compare to what I usually enjoy, but it does its job."
Apollo did his best not to glower. He had been saving that bottle, but saying something would make him look petty. Let her play her games, it isn't worth it raising a fuss like an offended child
Besides, he owed her… more than she probably knew.
Freya then took a sip, letting out a sensuous moan as the dark red liquid passed through her lips. Apollo shifted, feeling his blood–which had been smoldering since he left Ganesha's home– reignite.
"So? How did it go? Your return was swift, I'm only on my third glass."
He looked at her through hooded eyes, admiring her peerless beauty even as she did her best to anger him.
The clothes–if they could be called that– she was wearing did nothing to alleviate his lust. Pieces of fabric, really, that clung to her like a second skin, leaving nothing of the body underneath to the imagination, and covering just enough to keep her modest in the barest sense of the word.
But, to be honest, Apollo didn't mind that she kept her most tantalising parts hidden. He always enjoyed unraveling his presents.
He drank in the sight, his eyes following the line of her legs to her wide hips, her exposed flat stomach and up to her breasts and the hint of pink that peeked from her clothing.
The pearl-white skin that looked to be softer than silk calling for his fingers to explore and discover, the long silver hair that he wished to see forming a halo behind her head as he took her on his bed, or that he longed to wrap around his hand and pull as he thrusted into her from behind.
Apollo licked his lips, and his view finally reached her face.
There was a satisfied and smug–almost mocking– glint on her eyes.
Apollo was weak to her, and she knew it, taking pleasure in showing just enough to tempt and wreck his self-control.
"Minx," he scoffed, and lowered himself on one of the couches in his office. Exhaling through his nose, Apollo finally replied. "It went as well as I could have hoped," he said, shrugging. "Better than it could have gone if I hadn't been forewarned and forearmed. I am in your debt, Freya."
Freya chuckled, "Oh, Apollo, do I always have to remind you to not say things like that? You make it sound so… transactional. How many times have I helped you and not asked for anything in return?" She smirked. "You are a precious friend, and as long as you remain so, there are no debts between us."
Apollo smiled thinly, taking the not-so-subtle threat for what it was. A reminder of how much he had profited from their relationship… and of how much she knew about him that could crush him if it was widely known.
And now she knows more.
He loved Hyakinthos, but failing to inform him of something as important as a disagreement with the two law enforcing Familias of the city, retired as one may have been, ended up being a costly mistake.
'I didn't believe it was serious enough to warrant your immediate attention' didn't exactly cut it as a suitable excuse.
It hurt him, but he may need to punish his precious child for the first time ever.
If it wasn't for Freya's timely warning, he wouldn't have even known of the situation before it came to bite him.
"Besides, it was only a coincidence that one of my children was in position to witness what happened," Freya smiled. "You're lucky that Astraea's child was involved and not just Ganesha's."
"Oh? Is there something you wish to tell me? Are you interested in Astraea's boy?" He hoped not. Having Freya as a competitor for him would be… unfortunate.
"Oh, no. Nothing like that." Freya giggled. "I've been keeping an eye on Astraea and her child. I have a little project, you know, that I've been working on for a little over a year. Fixing a little something that was left broken on my doorstep." She sighed exasperatedly. "It took some time to not have it crumble on me, but it's working properly now."
"And is that related to Astraea, how?"
"Well, I thought that having her return now would bring it all down. It was rather fragile, you see." Oh my, it seems that Freya has been a bad girl recently. A criminal organization of sorts she picked up? A shady business? "I worried needlessly, though. If anything, my little broken bird has been flourishing lately."
Or maybe someone?
"I'm just glad my needless fretting ended up helping you." She smiled.
"As I am, like always you are as magnanimous as you are beautiful," he said, a part of him actually meaning the words. If it wasn't for Freya, he couldn't have risen as fast as he did… but now that he shouldn't need her anymore, he didn't enjoy falling deeper into her pocket. "If it wasn't for you, it wouldn't have been just a chastisement and a warning. The Guild might have gotten involved."
The money was just a pittance, he didn't even register it as a punishment. Having Ganesha–and Astraea– being wary of him going forward was the actual price he paid for this situation.
"You got off easy, then," Freya remarked. "Ganesha is… prickly when it comes to the populace."
I wish I knew that before. He had never been on the receiving end of Ganesha's anger, it had been an… enlightening experience.
Almost arousing, to be honest. He loved passionate men.
"Your words helped." Apollo smirked. "As you said, Astraea was the linchpin. Striking her vulnerabilities stopped her… for a moment or two."
Freya laughed. "You didn't seriously believe that just remarking about some spilled blood would actually deter her, did you? She's stronger than that."
Apollo raised an eyebrow. There was genuine fondness in her tone. Interesting.
"I didn't," he admitted, "but it helped divert their attention from my dear Hyakinthos and, more importantly, get that frigid bitch off her high horse." His words were full of anger, almost a snarl, but there was a smile full of twisted satisfaction on his face. "How satisfying it was, to remind the Goddess of Purity how filthy she truly is."
It didn't make hundreds of years of humiliation sting any less, but it was almost cathartic.
There was a moment of silence, and then Freya placed her almost empty glass on his desk, her eyes cold.
"Careful, Apollo." Her tone was light and airy, but the undercurrent of anger was noticeable. "Astraea and I might not be close, but I consider her an ally–if not a friend– and respect her and care for her deeply. Mind your tongue when speaking about her."
Apollo scoffed. Snake. "You are one to talk, after telling me to use what happened to Rudra as an argument." He smiled mirthlessly. "She was hurt, you know? Your dear ally. Is that how you show your respect and care, Freya?"
"It is, actually." Freya returned the smile.
"Oh? You'll have to explain that to me."
She picked up the glass again and stared at her reflection for a moment.
"Like I said, Astraea is strong… but even the strongest being wouldn't know how weak their weak points could be until they are struck." Her voice was soft, almost contemplative, and her eyes were far away, like they were stuck in a memory.
The strongest…Thinking of Zeus and Hera, perhaps? Or something else?
"Now that her reputation is tarnished, Astraea needed to know that there are worms wriggling in the mud that would grasp at anything to further bring her down to their level."
"Worms like me, you mean?" he laughed.
"Worse." Like Evillus, then. "It will happen eventually, so why not make it happen in a controlled environment? In a situation that doesn't matter, against an enemy that doesn't truly mean her harm. It is why I came to you when I learned of the situation, to help you and help her." She sighed, looking for all intents and purposes remorseful. "For a lesson–of a harsher kind, perhaps– that she needed to learn. That is my care for her."
Apollo watched her for a moment. "I see, if you put it like that, I can understand."
It made sense, to be honest, both in a personal and in a pragmatic way. Freya looking after her friend and preparing her for the worst… and The Queen of Orario looking at her pieces and using one to strengthen the other.
It didn't make it any less twisted.
Or any less of a lie.
No, maybe not a lie, but there was more to it. There was always more when it came to Freya. Plans and objectives hidden under other hidden plans and objectives.
He was curious.
And the hint to unravel this laid not on the meeting, but on what led to it.
His eyes narrowed. "And here I thought you did it for our friendship. I feel almost used, and not in a good way." He shrugged. "Well, it's not like I didn't get anything out of this. I feel blessed by the fates for facilitating that meeting."
Was it about him, after all?
She had denied it, but he couldn't help but worry.
He had been thinking about this on the way back. About the reason for her interference, of how quick she was to come and warn him.
And how she warned about trying to poach Astraea's latest child. Made him promise, even.
She said it was because Astraea would be sensitive about it, and that would ruin any attempt to negotiate.
But, after getting to know him, after recognizing him from his dear Chryseis' memories, Apollo knew there was more to it.
"Blessed?" Freya asked. "Even though those two girls were taken from your grasp?"
"Girls?" Apollo scoffed. "Why would I care about two flickering candles after seeing the sun shining upon the world?" Even an hour after meeting him, he still felt shivers going down his spine. "You are cruel, you know? Making me promise something you knew I wouldn't be able to keep."
"You did it, then." Freya said coldly. "Even though I asked you, you tried to take him."
Apollo smiled, feeling the threat her words contained–the anger of a Goddess of War– and not caring one bit.
"I did," he admitted. "Can you blame me? You would do the same, if you knew what he did in that meeting, what he looked like." He wouldn't tell her, of course. Just in case she didn't know… ah. "Or maybe you did know, and that is what this is all about." he accused again.
Freya didn't say anything, she just watched him like he was a bug she wanted to crush under her feet.
"Give me something, Freya," he almost begged. "Otherwise, the moment you take a step out of my home, I will gather my children and declare war on Astraea."
Freya scoffed. "You will declare a War Game with no other justification than to take him? Against Astraea, of all people?"
"I am the one that carries the Sun across the sky, and I want him who shines like It by my side. Is that not enough justification?"
Astraea won't appreciate him like he would, not in his entirety.
He was beautiful, his passion burns bright, and that golden glow of his was warm and inviting, it accepted everyone and everything equally. What can he call it, other than the Sun?
If he had met him a couple of years ago, he wouldn't have called Hyakinthos his Phoebus Apollo. His title of Bright wouldn't have belonged to his first child.
"He won't love you for it."
"He will," he declared. "Regardless of how I recruited them, all my children love me in the end. And he won't be any different, even if he now desires Astraea."
There was a touch of curiosity that passed through her expression but was gone in a moment.
Freya's eyes narrowed. "If you do, if you go through this foolishness, you will regret it."
Apollo sighed. "Like I thought, you do want him, that is why you want to stop me."
He grimaced.
Astraea was weak, and her child, while magnificent, was just a Level One.
His magic weapons, whether he had an armory he could summon or he outright created them –which was ridiculous to consider, to be honest, but his thoughts kept pointing in that direction– showed he could be dangerous if Apollo acted rashly. However, if he waited a couple of months until Hyakinthos was a Level Three, Shirou Emiya would certainly lose on his own
But to face Freya?
Apollo wasn't stupid, he would be crushed.
Contrary to his expectations, however, Freya shook her head once again. "He is interesting, I'll give you that, but this isn't about him." She then shrugged, a small smirk on her face. "Mind you, even if I didn't stop you, you wouldn't get what you wanted. As things are now, Astraea would destroy you."
Apollo scoffed. "She wouldn't. Astraea is nothing now, she only has Shirou Emiya-"
"You know he's just the Vice-Captain, right?" Freya interrupted and Apollo blinked, confused. Vice-Captain? Then who-? "What do you think the Gale Wind will do if she learns you want to take her goddess' new child?"
Apollo felt his blood freeze, and he knew that if he saw a mirror he would see his skin pale rapidly. "The Gale Wind…?"
"You thought she was gone? Dead or Exiled?" Freya laughed. "She's in Orario, and she's Astraea's new Captain."
Apollo swallowed, trying to moisten his suddenly dry throat, before exclaiming, "But she's banned! The Guild blacklisted her!"
Freya raised an eyebrow. "Indeed they did–from working with them, that is. But since when the Guild has any say in how Familias handle their inner affairs?" Her smile was once more mocking. "Or who gets to participate in War Games?"
Oh.
He lowered his head into his hands.
His children were dead. If he went through this, if he pursued his desire… that bloodthirsty monster would kill them all.
There was a moment or two of complete silence. His mind rushing through possibilities, but finding none.
His shoulders dropped even more.
"My, you really are quick to give up," Freya remarked. "I did say 'As things are now', didn't I?"
Apollo raised his head, and looked at Freya in disbelief. "Freya…?"
"Things are too fragile for you to meddle now, Apollo. I can't have you bring chaos now that things are beginning to settle," she said. "Today was a nice wake-up call for Astraea, but more than that and her Familia will either go on a crusade, or leave the city."
Apollo felt the stirrings of hope in his heart. Freya had a plan. "And we can't have that."
"Indeed." Freya didn't bat an eye at his own inclusion in her plans. "So, for now, we wait and see. Maybe use this time to have your children strengthen themselves, you'll probably need it."
Yes. If he wanted to take his sun away from the Gale Wind, his children needed to be ready.
"When the time comes, of course, you'll have my assistance in one way or another, so don't fret too much."
Then Apollo didn't have any complaints. He'll wait, for now.
Just a question remained.
"Will you tell me?" he asked, and Freya raised an eyebrow. "The real reason you're doing all this for."
"The real reason, huh…" Freya looked away, her silver eyes going distant. She let the silence hang, and Apollo thought he wouldn't get an answer until… "Fate," she finally said, her voice cold. "My reason for doing anything is fate."
Apollo raised an eyebrow, his interest piqued. "Fate?"
Disconnected as he was of his true power here in the Lower World, his premonitions reduced to faint hunches and flashes of inspiration, he nonetheless was acutely aware of the ebb and flow of destiny.
He was the God of Prophecies, after all, even if he was diminished now. Freya was talking about his domain
Freya nodded. "I've been looking for mine for as long as I remember, but I never found it."
She lifted her glass and downed the last of the wine, before putting it on his desk.
She sighed, almost unnoticeably. "It didn't appear in my travels, regardless of how far I went, or during my walks through the city, no matter how much I looked for it." Her voice was… tired. Resigned. "It never knocked on my door, despite my fame."
Freya then turned to him and met his eyes.
Apollo breathed in sharply, feeling a cold shiver go down his spine.
Behind the sadness and the exhaustion, there was madness in her eyes.
"And then I realized, seeing my little bird recently flourish," she continued, cocking her head, a humorless smile twisting her beautiful lips. "That if it never appeared after hundreds–thousands– of years, then it's possible that my fate doesn't exist," Freya whispered.
"And that I need to create it, even if it is from broken pieces."
-Line Break-
Shirou Emiya
There was a certain tension to my shoulders as I let my eyes roam around the street.
A couple of my Magic Circuits were activated, my attention split inwards as I constantly traced any and all weapons that entered my sight, watching out for members of a certain Familia.
I never found any.
I must make quite the sight. I wasn't wearing my armor, but I was armed, standing in front of an inn, shoulders squared and eyes going from person to person like I was expecting an attack.
Especially in the atmosphere around me.
Garlands and flags fluttering with the wind, the music of bards blending together with the yells of the owners of the stalls that covered the sides of the streets, and, even as the last rays of the sun started to fade, I could see children running underfoot, their screams of delight adding to the cacophony of sounds of cheer.
I was the odd one out here, expecting a threat that I wasn't sure was coming.
That meeting, was I still being a pessimist by thinking it went a little too well? The girls were okay, Apollo had been punished, if only monetarily –I wasn't sure I was satisfied with the severity of it, but at least it was something,— and he had been warned about future instances.
It was, for all intents and purposes, just a slap on the wrist, but both Astraea and Ganesha agreed that it would be enough to deter Apollo and his Familia in the future.
But I suppose I wasn't trusting–or maybe experienced– enough to think the same. Apollo's eyes as he left the room, his words… I expected more to come. From the moment we left Ganesha's home, I expected some kind of attack, either as retaliation or to satisfy the god's greed.
It didn't happen, and the more time passed–especially amongst the throngs of people filling the streets of Orario thanks to the festival– the more paranoid I felt.
My eyes went to the inn in front of me and I let out a breath. "I still think we should have gone in with them," I said, glancing to my side where Astraea stood, her shoulders covered by my blue cloak. Goddess or not, her dress had been far too light for the cold weather. "If only to help them pack."
Astraea let out a sigh, the air misting in front of her mouth. "Shirou, as much as you'd like to be helpful, there are things in a maiden's wardrobe that they might not want to show a young man." She smiled, but there was a slight sharpness to it. "Or maybe that's what you wanted? Are you curious about them?"
I raised an unimpressed eyebrow and she giggled. I rolled my eyes. "You know that that's not what I meant, my goddess," I said. "I just worry that something might happen to them."
"Nothing's going to happen, we're just a few streets away from Pantheon. Apollo would need to be mad to do something here of all places," Astraea said, and then sighed. "But you're right, I might have offered them help packing… but I wanted some minutes of privacy between us before we went back home."
I straightened my back. "Is something wrong?"
"A lot, to be honest." She smiled wanly. "Some matters might be better to discuss them only in Stardust Garden," I cocked my head. Something about my magic or my background, then. Or Lion. "But I am curious about what you think of them both, you spent some time together before I arrived. Anything of note?"
"Other than the fact that both of them grew up with tales of Astraea's famous Familia? Hearing bedtime stories of the heroic Scarlet Harnel and her companions?" Astraea's eyes widened in delight and I smiled. "Not much, to be honest. Daphne has experience hunting and tracking, and Cassandra knows how to heal wounds and make potions. Both will be good additions to our Familia, I think, if they accept."
"Oh? Was I too obvious in my intention?"
"A little." I nodded.
When the meeting finally concluded and the matter of what the girls were going to do– whether they would stay in the inn they had recused themselves in or search for a new place to stay–, Astraea pitched in and offered them rooms in Stardust Garden.
By the glint in Ganesha's eyes and the excitement the offer brought to Cassandra and Daphne, I wasn't the only one that realised where her offer was heading. "They probably are freaking out inside, wondering if they read you right. You're going to ask them, then?"
Astraea fell silent for a second, and then nodded. "Not tonight, but eventually. I don't want to make them feel like my offer of… asylum just depends on them joining us." She glanced at me. "I took a few days to get to know you before I made my offer, I will probably do the same with them. Daphne already impressed me with her selflessness and bravery today, and Cassandra… Well, she is a little shy, but she seems kindhearted and sweet, perfect for a healer."
I nodded, agreeing with her impressions, before I smiled with some amusement. "Well, it seems they won't need to take care of a goblin horde to impress you, then."
Astraea laughed, "Hopefully not! Only you would consider doing that without a blessing, you silly man."
I smiled, losing myself a little in her smile and the brightness of her eyes, but then her expression dimmed slightly "We also need to tell them about Ryuu first. I won't ask them to contribute to the Guild payment, but it would be unfair for them to join without knowing the situation we're in."
I nodded. "Of course," I said, sobered a little by the topic. "Ah, speaking of Lion, we should fetch her on our way home, shouldn't we?"
If there was someone who needed to know about our prospective recruits it was her.
"Don't worry, she's waiting for us back home," Astraea said with a guilty smile. "We were actually having tea when Ganesha's messenger came. I didn't expect our business to take so long, she must be worried."
"Uh, so she knows I picked up a fight with a Level Two?" I cringed.
Astraea giggled, "She was quite angry when we heard. Imagine how she would react knowing you threatened a god just now."
I huffed, "Once I tell her what Apollo said, she'll probably offer to help me," I said ruefully.
It suited me better if she knew, actually. I had a favour to ask her regarding that, after all.
I shook my head, pulling myself out of my thoughts and let my eyes roam around the street once more, remembering I still had a duty to perform.
"You seem tense, Shirou." I twitched minutely when I felt Astraea's arms wrap around mine, and then forced myself to relax. She giggled, "You really are."
"Shouldn't I be, Astraea?" I asked, half sincerely, half archly.
Astraea hummed, her sapphire blue eyes looking at me with a little worry. "I can't blame you for being cautious, but you shouldn't be tense," she chided. "Even disregarding that you are so twitchy you wouldn't be able to react properly if something actually happened… Look at the people around you, Shirou."
I did as she bid, and once again paned my eyes around our little bubble of privacy. It took me a second but soon I noticed what she wanted me to see.
It was subtle, but I could see how, every so often, people in the crowd would glance in my direction and their cheer would diminish. The good mood would fade from their eyes and be replaced with worry. Some Adventurers even started to look around in suspicion, exchanging looks and palming their weapons.
I sighed, and with a deep breath– and a small application of self-hypnosis–, I relaxed my shoulders.
"That's better," Astraea whispered, softly caressing my arm, and I almost tensed again, but for other, baser, reasons. "You need to be conscious of how your bearing affects those around you, especially when you are wearing my symbol," she said, smiling a little apologetically, and one of her hands grabbed mine. "For better or worse, you are carrying the weight of the fame of your predecessors."
My shoulders fell a little, and I let out another breath, mist coming out of my mouth as it met the cold air. "I'm sorry. You're right, Astraea," I said, cringing. "I know you said it wouldn't happen, but I keep thinking we're going to get ambushed sooner or later, and I didn't really consider how it must look from the outside."
The streets were filled with warriors, of course they would note my anxiousness instantly and react accordingly.
"You don't need to apologize, Shirou," Astraea said. "But I do think you are overdoing it. It would be foolish for Apollo to attack us without reason, or the girls, for that matter, after he agreed to leave them alone." Then she grinned impishly–and more than a little smugly. "And, after your little show, he will probably think twice before doing anything."
I huffed, still feeling a little embarrassed for my outburst. It hadn't been my initial intention to call attention to myself, however the more he spoke– the more flippant he seemed about angering and challenging Astraea– the more I realized that I needed to do something before he left.
"Hopefully you're right." I smiled a little sarcastically. "Otherwise it would seem like I risked the meeting– and the girls' safety– only for my ego." We had already achieved what we set out to do. What I did could have undone that, and I wouldn't be able to blame none other than myself.
"You still feel guilty for that?" Astraea sighed exasperatedly. "You already apologized enough to Ganesha, and I said that I agreed with your reasoning. Hadn't you done that, they probably would have left with the thought that they could walk all over us, that we needed Ganesha to fight our battles." She grimaced. "Whether we like it or not, a show of force is sometimes necessary. You did well."
I hesitantly nodded.
Lion had told me that I would be the face of the Familia until she could come back, so I didn't want to let this god go until he and his Familia realized that Astraea wasn't one to be underestimated.
My intention had been to just give them a verbal warning, maybe flare my Reinforcement to let them know I wasn't just a Level One, that there was something to be wary about me. It would, at the very least, make them at least waste time trying to investigate and prepare.
A show of force, as Astraea had put it.
My weapon creation, however, hadn't been part of the plan, much less using my new Aria for the first time in public.
Astraea cocked her head. "What is it, my hero? It's not like you to doubt yourself."
"I'm not, not really. I'm just a little ashamed at how easy it was for me to lose my cool." I grimaced. "I exposed more of my magic than I intended to."
I hadn't traced anything too outlandish, thank god. Most of what I created had been some of the cheapest weapons I often saw during my commute to Babel. Even the magic swords I made were crappy ones I saw around Orario.
Alf's Lumina was probably the best weapon from this world I had in my… collection, but its existence could be explained. The Noble Phantasms and legendary weapons I could trace from my world? Not so much.
Fortunately, I did have enough clarity of mind to only create those weapons that could be considered normal, like Rider's nails and Berserker's axe-sword.
His blades, however? Those had been a mistake.
I wasn't comfortable tracing Kanshou and Bakuya, beautiful and deadly as they were. I normally tried not to even think about them, otherwise the temptation to lose myself in their history might be too strong.
Since the first moment I traced them, back when I was training with Tohsaka, I became aware of the weight behind its history... so I did my best to avoid them, lest said weight crushes me.
I had to admit, shamefully, that it scared me, the thought of delving deep into them.
I'm not him, I silently reassured myself, even if I traced those weapons, my memories are still mine. Saber is still with me.
I'm not him, I repeated in my mind, the words a mantra, and shoved the thought of him out of my mind, focusing back on Astraea.
Luckly she didn't seem to notice my internal turmoil. "You did. But what's done is done," she said nodding while looking at me seriously. "That is one of the matters we need to discuss later, something happened with your magic today."
I raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
"When you chanted, I felt… something," she grimaced. "But we'll speak later. If the others didn't notice–and considering Ganesha didn't say anything, they probably didn't– it's best if we kept this secret."
"This sounds… important," I said, a little uncomfortable. What did she notice in my magic that I didn't? To be completely honest, I hadn't paid much attention outside of how easy it was to actualize my spells after using the new chant. Using it compared to Trace On felt like the difference between using my fake and my true Magic Circuits. "Sorry, if I knew it would be so grave, I wouldn't have done it."
Astraea smiled. "You think so? I think you would have done it anyway in your desire to protect those two. You did tell me that you used to get angry at bullies when you were a child, did you not?" she said, amused, before sighing with mock exasperation. "Righteous anger, the bane of many heroes."
I huffed, not being able to stop my smile. "Righteous anger, huh," I murmured.
I was no stranger to anger–like she said, it got me into my fair share of fights in elementary school, after all–, but few were the times where it reached such a threshold that instead of burning hot, it froze every other emotion in me, leaving only a cold, cutting clarity.
When Shinji intended to make his Servant consume every other student in Homurahara; when I laid on the ground, body broken, and had to witness Saber fight- and be defeated by– Gilgamesh while protecting me; and lastly when I found Tohsaka bleeding out in my house, and learnt that Kotomine had kidnapped Illya.
And each and every time it happened, I tried to murder –and succeeded, in Kotomine's case– the one responsible for it.
That same cold rage filled me when I heard Apollo talk so uncaringly of the pain he caused Daphne and Cassandra and got only worse when he began insulting my goddess right in front of me.
It almost frightened me, how willing I was to spill blood. But sometimes, when you want to protect someone, there's no other choice but violence—or the threat of it.
I probably wouldn't have felt as guilty if it was just that, but, well, that hadn't been the only reason I lost my temper. I glanced at Astraea, feeling my heart speed up slightly. She met my eyes and smiled, puzzled. "What is it?"
For a moment, I considered deflecting, but no. She deserved the truth from my lips. Apollo had already spilled enough.
"Part of my anger could be called righteous, yes. I wanted to stop Daphne and Cassandra's suffering," I paused, lowering my gaze as my chest tightened. "But there was another part…Something more selfish."
"Selfish? You, Shirou, were selfish?" Astraea asked, confusion in her voice. Her hand was shaking slightly as she held mine, whether it was the cold or something else, I couldn't tell. Does she know? The stupidity I'm about to say? "About what?"
I closed my eyes for a moment, and sighed, turning to her.
Slowly, I raised my free hand to her cheek, cupping it gently. Her skin was soft, and warm despite the chill in the air. "About you," I said, my thumb caressing her cheekbone, and Astraea jolted, her blue eyes widening. "I was jealous," I admitted. my voice steady even as my heart raced. "Of the way Apollo was looking at you. I was jealous of another man desiring you– the woman I'm growing to love– the same way I do."
She froze, her eyes stuck on mine.
I waited, strangely calm.
From the moment I realized my feelings for Astraea, there had been a knot of anxiety in my gut. I'd fear her noticing my lingering looks, or how much her touches– her sole presence– affected me. I didn't want to ruin what we had, so I just went about my days, just continuing our daily lives.
And, shameful as it sounded, if it wasn't for meeting Apollo today, I would have continued to do so.
"I tried to show her my love. And for centuries, she rejected me. What makes you think you are different?"
Just like I realised the depth of my feelings for Saber when Gilgamesh came to claim her, Apollo made me realize that I didn't want my burgeoning love for Astraea fade into lukewarm familiarity.
If she rejected the notion of it now, then I would accept it and do my best to put my feelings aside, but if there was even the slightest possibility of her accepting them, accepting me… I don't want to have any regrets, not regarding this.
The tumult of the city became a distant thing, the voices fading as I focused my attention on the woman standing in front of me. She was looking at me with surprise and disbelief, like she didn't expect these words to come out of my mouth.
But soon, she moved.
Slowly–almost tentatively– the hand that was holding mine shifted, her fingers intertwining with mine. First, softly, but soon her grip tightened. I watched, unable to look away, as a shy, sweet smile curved her lips.
Astraea shifted forward, nuzzling her cheek against my hand for a moment before she moved forward and rested her head on my shoulder. The gesture was reserved and a little uncertain, but soon she relaxed, her slight weight pressed against me.
"I didn't like it either," she said, her words a whisper. "The feel of his eyes on me, it felt… wrong. Like it was sullying me." She chuckled and met my eyes, her own twinkling, and a small blush rose on her cheeks. "But most of all, it felt wrong because it wasn't you."
Feeling my heart trying to thud its way out of my chest, I breathed deeply, my sense of smell invaded by her flowery scent.
"So it doesn't… displease you?" I asked. "What I feel for you?"
"It doesn't," she answered, her cheeks flushed deeper. "I might be feeling the same, after all." My heart thundered with her words, elation rushing through me.
I smiled back, feeling my own face burn.
We stood there looking at each other, almost frozen in time. Neither of us was in any rush to fill the silence with words… as there was no need. The warmth I could see in her eyes–the same she most likely saw in mine–, our fingers laced together… It was enough.
Until it wasn't.
It was just a flash, but focused as I was in her features, it was hard to miss the glance she gave my lips. It was harder when she did it again, her eyes filled with nervous indecision.
I breathed in deeply, trying to calm the fluttering in my chest.
My hand rose to her chin and lifted it slightly before I copied her gesture and snuck a glance to her beautiful pink lips. Surprise flashed across her features, her nerves intensifying for a moment, but then her eyes fluttered closed and her lips parted slightly, her cheeks blazing red.
Cute.
I smiled and closed the distance, my eyes slipping shut as I leaned in. Then our lips met, and in that moment, the world faded away.
The warmth of her body against mine made the chill in the air vanish, her scent—the now familiar light, floral sweetness—overwhelming my senses. Her lips were soft, their touch chaste and hesitant, yet they set an inferno ablaze in my chest, my blood rushing like liquid fire.
When we parted, her eyes fluttered open, but remained lost for a moment. Then she seemed to come back to herself, and she looked down bashfully, but not before I caught the small, radiant smile curving her lips.
I exhaled slowly, my breath misting in the cold air as I brushed a stray strand of her chestnut hair back behind her ear. The world around us seemed impossibly still. Astraea's gaze flitted up, her lashes trembling slightly, before she turned her cheek into my palm, once more nuzzling it softly.
The spell was broken, eventually, by a speck of white drifting into view, landing on Astraea's nose.
She blinked, startled, and her eyes almost crossed as she tried to look at the tip of her nose. I looked up, and saw more and more of the same familiar specks falling from the sky.
"Snow," I whispered, and looked down, feeling my smile grow amused at how she was wrinkling her nose, trying to get a peek of the snowflake. "It seems the first snowflake of the year decided to greet you, Astraea."
How curious.
It was spring in Fuyuki when I got sent here, and now I would experience a second winter in the same year.
She pouted at my look, but then she let out a small sneeze. "Uuh~ That was cold," she said, shivering slightly.
"It is cold, my goddess," I whispered, wrapping my arm around her lower back and pulling her close, our bodies almost melding together. "Better?"
Astraea buried her face in my chest and let out a sigh of contentment. "Fufu, much better~," she whispered back before her hands slid up, meeting behind my nape. "Once again you lend me your warmth. You spoil me, my hero."
"And I'm happy to do so, Astraea," I replied softly, confident she would know it to be true.
We didn't put a name to what had just happened, to what we were becoming. It wasn't that we were ignoring it—far from it. But to talk about it didn't feel necessary right now.
As we waited for our charges to return, the snow fell quietly around us, and we stayed close, sharing warmth against the cold. What had passed between us lingering in the background, like a quiet promise.
A silent oath, made under the snow.
-Line Break-
It was just a few minutes later when the girls returned with their packs.
Cassandra and Daphne had a slight moment of awkwardness when they saw us embracing as they came out, but other than some surprise– and a slight flash of disappointment I saw passing through Cassandra's expression–, they soon seemed to take it in stride.
I wonder if Apollo's situation skewed their perception of the relationship between a god and their children.
The return to Stardust Garden was a little silent… but enjoyable. Astraea walked beside me, hugging my right arm to her chest, a soft smile on her face as she looked around, taking in the lively atmosphere of the city with gleaming eyes.
Even after the sun hid, the amount of people walking around hadn't diminished. No, if anything, Orario became more and more animated as Adventurers ending their day in the Dungeon joined the civilians that had been enjoying the celebrations.
I wonder how curious it must seem for Astraea, seeing Orario so lively. Considering what she told me about the years before, events like this festival the Guild had organized wouldn't happen when Evilus was around.
She seems to be enjoying it…
I cocked my head, thinking. Lately, we've been a little too busy to walk around the stands and enjoy the celebrations ourselves, but maybe I should make some time and invite her. Make it a small date.
The notion strengthened as I caught her giving me shy glances every now and then, a pretty red settling on her cheeks each time. Once or twice, one of her hands raised to her lips, like she was reminiscing our kiss.
I want to do it again… She wasn't the only one affected, of course, and it was a struggle to keep my eyes away from her as we walked. There would be time for that later, hopefully.
I distracted myself by keeping an eye on Cassandra and Daphne, who walked behind us, their expressions a little guarded. The two of them seemed to be nervous about being in the open, probably expecting one of Apollo's children to pop out and bother them once again.
I kept my expression placid, but I couldn't help the anger that surfaced at that thought. It seemed that it would take some time until they could feel truly relaxed in public.
An idea crossed my mind, something to take their mind off the situation.
I turned slightly to Astraea. "Say, should we take a small detour before we go home?" I said with a smile. "We can get some fresh ingredients and I can make a feast to receive these two." Astraea narrowed her eyes in warning and I rolled my eyes "As a late, more pleasant, welcome to Orario." She nodded, satisfied. I huffed, It's not like they don't suspect what you intend, my goddess.
"That's a nice idea, Shirou," she said with a smile. "Besides, what better way to introduce them to Ryuu than over dinner?"
Cassandra jolted in surprise. "Sir Shirou! I-it's not necessary!" She waved her hands, demurring. "You already did more than enough!
Daphne, though, was less reserved about it. "Oh? How surprising, a man that can cook." She grinned, looking at me appraisingly. "Do you take suggestions? I'm beginning to miss some dishes from back home."
"Daphne!" Cassandra exclaimed, scandalized.
"You can ask," I shrugged. "But I'm still not really familiar with the dishes around here, so I might need some help." I glanced at Astraea and she perked up.
"Oh, cooking together sounds lovely." she nodded with a bright smile, looking at me warmly. "It's always either you or me cooking, but never together. It will be our first time." Her smile turned shy at the end.
"Something to look forward to, then." I grinned, doing my best to ignore her unintentional double-entendre. "I hope you can keep up, though, my goddess. I've been told I'm a harsh taskmaster."
Astraea giggled, "Oh my, I'm sure I'll be fine." Her smile then turned challenging. "If anything, I think you will need to keep up with me. I've been cooking for my children for as long as I took Alise in for the first time, you know."
I raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore the undisguised curiosity our little exchange brought in the two girls following us. "We'll see."
"We will, indeed."
"E-excuse me, lady Astraea," Cassandra began suddenly, her face pink, and trailed off for a moment when Astraea looked at her, like she forgot what she was about to say. "I- Um, Ah! I'm just wondering who the Miss Ryuu you mentioned is?" she asked after a couple of false starts.
"Ah! That's right, you wouldn't know her by that name," Astraea mused, "She's one of my precious children, alongside Shirou," she said. "My captain." The last word was filled with pride.
Cassandra gasped, looking to be panicking. "O-oh! We're going to meet the captain already?" she whispered towards Daphne.
"Don't panic, idiot, you'll make us look bad." Daphne whispered, looking nervous herself. "Wait, didn't you say she wasn't around? That she couldn't work as an Adventurer?
"I did say that, yes." I nodded. "You shouldn't underestimate her, though," I added, grinning ruefully. "I still feel tender from the last time I trained with her. That ruthless woman is strong."
"Shirou, don't be rude," Astraea chided me. "If I remember correctly, you asked for it."
I shrugged, it's not like I disliked it or anything. I preferred Lion to be as ruthless as possible. What better way to learn than from others taking advantage of one's mistakes?
Daphne gulped, but covered it up with a cough. "W-well, let's go then." she nodded, squaring her shoulders, her expression set, but she couldn't hide her nervousness. I tried not to show my amusement. Instead of looking serious, she just looked adorable. "I'm looking forward to meeting her."
Cassandra nodded repeatedly, looking at us intently.
"Don't be scared." Astraea giggled. "She's a little serious but she doesn't bite," she said, and started walking, pulling me along. "Now, Ryuu recommended a place where she and her friends usually buy groceries. It's around here, if I'm not mistaken…"
Cassandra and Daphne followed us, now tense for another reason other than Apollo. They probably were thinking about how to make a nice impression on Lion.
Lion's probably going to be more nervous than they are, once they are introduced. I wonder how the taciturn woman would take to new prospective members.
Astraea was mean, springing this on her without warning. I wasn't going to stop her, though. I looked forward to my captain's surprise.
Ah, I wonder if my goddess' teasing is contagious?
-Line Break-
I opened the steel door of the oven and was hit by a waft of heat and the fragrant aroma of spices and butter. I took a peek inside and smiled at the sight of the golden brown skin of the stuffed chicken cooking inside.
It seems that more and more I'm growing used to cooking western dishes. I still treat myself to the occasional japanese meal, but I'm aware that not every palate is used to Asian cuisine.
This dish, a chicken coated in butter, stuffed with cheese, ham, tomatoes and a mix of herbs was the suggestion that came from Daphne, something that her mother used to make with the produce from her own farm.
"How does it look?" Astraea asked, her eyes focused on the cutting table in front of her. Chop, chop, chop, chop. Her use of the knife showed how experienced she was, the lettuce she was chopping reduced to thin strips in a few moments.
"The chicken is just about to be done, but the potatoes could use a little bit of browning before we can serve them. Five minutes more, maybe?"
Astraea nodded, continuing her work by dicing some tomatoes. "Could you peel the onions for me, please?"
I hummed in acquiescence. In spite of our competitive words, it seems that our cooking skills were similar enough– at least when it came to western dishes– that we fell into seamless teamwork once we started.
It was nice to cook with someone that actually knew how to move in a kitchen. It took Sakura years before she could actually do more than just assist me with simple tasks, and the less I talk about Fuji-nee, the better.
And, well, the sight didn't hurt either.
I approached her, my eyes drinking in her figure. She had changed her usual dress to a comfy sweater and a long skirt that fell to her ankles, and her long hair had been tied into a ponytail, her nape exposed to my eyes.
The image was completed by the pale pink apron she wore over her clothes.
She looked… comfortable.
Her dicing stopped when she caught my eyes. She tilted her head. "What is it?
I smiled, shaking my head, and continued my approach until I stood by her side. I grabbed an onion and began to peel it. "It's nothing," I said just as Astraea resumed her cutting. "I was just thinking how beautiful you look in those clothes."
She stopped once more. "Oh?" she said with a giggle, and I peeled a second onion before rinsing them. I glanced at her. She smiled at me, a pretty flush on her cheeks. "You look quite fetching yourself, mister." I huffed, I was just wearing a blue tunic and long pants. Comfortable, but nothing worth writing home about. "Do you really like these clothes? Or are you just teasing me back for all the times I did it to you?"
"I'm not teasing," I said, and she raised an eyebrow. "Okay, maybe I am trying to fluster you a little, but I'm being honest." I keep forgetting I can't really lie to a goddess. "Your usual dress is nice, but I like seeing you like this as well, relaxed at home."
I was being honest, but I understood her doubts. Before this afternoon I probably wouldn't have been so open with my words.
But I already told her I loved her, and kissed her, so what did I have to fear?
Astraea nodded seriously, looking like she was commiting my offhand compliment to memory. "I see…" she whispered, and returned her attention to her chopping. I smiled and did the same, grabbing a knife and began slicing the onions.
We fell into companionable silence, the symphony of our knives on wood, and the barely noticeable sizzling coming from the oven were the only sounds in the kitchen. Which meant that when Lion entered the kitchen, even if her steps were quiet as if to not interrupt us, we noticed instantly.
"Is everything okay, Ryuu? Do you need something?" Astraea asked, a kind smile on her face.
I caught Lion looking at us, her eyes narrowing slightly at the distance, or rather the lack of, between us. We were almost glued by the sides, our hips and shoulders brushing together. However, contrary to my expectations, she just nodded, looking almost satisfied.
I raised an eyebrow.
"Everything's fine, my lady," she said, shaking her head. "I was just… wondering if you two needed assistance with anything." She grimaced as she said the words, almost like she was berating herself for coming here.
Astraea glanced at me, and I shrugged. "Not really," I said. "We are pretty much finished." And as I said so I moved the thinly sliced onions into the wooden bowl Astraea had put the other parts of the salad. "The salad needs dressing, but Astraea will handle that," Astraea nodded at Lion apologetically, reaching for the oil and vinegar. "And the chicken and potatoes are almost done."
"I… see," she murmured, nodding, but didn't move from her place.
I cocked my head. "What is it, Lion?" I asked, puzzled. It's not like it was the first time I cooked for her, why did she seem so reserved?
We even left her with Cassandra and Daphne so they could get to know each othe- Ah.
We left her with Cassandra and Daphne.
The amusement I was feeling must have shown on my face because Lion's eyes narrowed at me. "What."
I shook my head, but couldn't keep the smile off my face. "Running away from two civilians, Captain?"
There was a beat of silence, before Astraea's eyes widened and then she burst into laughter, the hand that flew to cover her mouth not doing anything to stifle her amusement.
"It's not funny, Lady Astraea." Lion sighed, massaging her temple. "And I'm not running. It's just… a lot to handle, all of a sudden." Then she looked up, and glared at me and, shockingly, at Astraea. "And you two left me alone with them without warning."
Astraea giggled, "You make it sound like we left you there with two minotaurs."
Lion huffed. "If only. I know how to deal with minotaurs." With extreme violence, I gather. Not usable against teenage girls. "Those girls seem so starstruck by just being here, they can't seem to stop asking me for stories about things we did."
"Is that bad?" I asked, genuinely curious. "I thought you'd appreciate how fondly your friends are remembered."
"...It's not bad." she admitted, sounding conflicted about her own words. "They seem to know a lot about Alise and the rest, and they asked me some questions that made me remember some of our earlier adventures…" But even as she said it her face got more and more uncomfortable.
Astraea wiped her hands on a cloth and approached Lion, smiling softly.
"Oh, Ryuu, you might have grown up a lot, but you're still shy, it seems." She giggled, and caressed Lion's cheek. "Even back then you always made sure to stay in the background, wearing a mask and not even giving your full name. It must be a little uncomfortable being the center of attention, hm?" Lion flushed a little at Astraea's mothering.
"It's not that, " she said. "I… am aware that people miss the presence of the Astraea Familia, but to hear it directly said to me? It has never happened before." She sighed. "And… I don't think I deserve any idolatry, not after what I've done."
Lion grimaced.
"Do they even know who I am? Maybe that's why they-"
"Ryuu, they probably can guess. It's not like your disguise was anything but paper thin. You were the elf Adventurer Lion, and we introduced you to them as Ryuu Lion today." Astraea said, exasperated.
"Then, why? They should be disgusted about getting to know me, not elated."
"I think you underestimate your fame, my child. Just like there are people that will ignore everything good you did due to the… crimes you committed, there are some that won't forget your good deeds."
"People are selfish, Lion," I added with a shrug. "Sometimes as long as bad things don't happen to them, they can and will ignore them." There was such a thing as the bystander effect.
I should know, having lived through the tragedy caused by the fourth Holy Grail War. The fire caused hundreds of deaths and the public barely talked about it before sweeping it under the rug.
Yes, there had been some hypnosis involved, but only to cover the cause. The normal population was all too happy to forget the fire, no magic necessary.
Lion turned to me, a frown on her face. "I know, but that doesn't make it okay."
"It doesn't. But remember that you were nothing but a tale for them before today." I put on an oven mitt and took the chicken out of the oven, having almost forgotten it during the conversation. "Besides, the full truth of what happened isn't really well known amongst the public. For all they know, some stories were exaggerations."
"Then I will tell them everything. They deserve to know who is going to be their captain when they join us," she declared. "Because they are not just guests, aren't they? You mean to invite them to the Familia, don't you, my lady?"
"I do," Astraea said simply. "What do you think? Do you approve of them so far?"
"I… haven't known them enough to really tell." She sighed and smiled weakly. "But if you approve of them, then I don't have complaints."
She then turned and watched the door to the dining room, a thoughtful frown on her face.
"What is it?" Astraea asked softly.
"I-I guess that it just began to hit me, seeing people begin to join again," Lion whispered, her expression fragile. "The Familia. It's really coming back, huh?"
I smiled, and Astraea sweeped Lion into a hug, tenderly caressing her head. "It is already back, silly," she said, and chuckled when Lion buried her head on her shoulder. "Now, let's go and enjoy our feast so you can get to know them properly."
I decided to interject then. "Help me with the plates, will you, Captain?" I smiled. "Let's go feed our troops. Hunger is the enemy, after all."
Lion huffed, but then left Astraea's embrace with a small smile. There was an eagerness to her step as she approached, whether it was because of the food or the company that awaited her, I wouldn't know.
…But by the looks she kept giving the platters me and Astraea were carrying, it was probably the food.
-Line Break-
I had finished putting the last few clean dishes away, and was pouring some tea when I heard footsteps coming from upstairs.
Just in time, then. I smiled, taking both teacups and putting them on a small table in the kitchen.
It wouldn't be Cassandra or Daphne. They were falling asleep on the table after dinner, and Astraea told me that they conked out as soon as she showed them their rooms. That left her and Lion as the possible suspects.
And I only invited one of them for an after dinner conversation.
I was proven correct when Lion entered the kitchen a few moments later. "Sorry about that, Emiya, bath took longer than I expected," she said, her voice soft. "You ended up doing all the cleaning."
I smiled at her rueful tone, and shook my head. "It's alright. I don't mind doing it, to be honest, it gives me time to think and relax."
I turned, and froze.
Lion was using a towel to dry her still damp green hair –though I couldn't help but notice the blonde roots that were growing more prominent by the day–, her cheeks were flushed due to the heat of the bath, and faint wisps of steam clung to her skin. For a fleeting moment, I couldn't help but think she looked… alluring.
Almost unbidden, my eyes wandered down… but something else caught my attention, replacing the brief stirrings of attraction with curiosity.
Lion was wearing a light tank top and shorts, revealing more skin than I was used to seeing from her. She was thinner than Saber had been– her body lacking the defined musculature I had come to associate with Artoria–, so it was hard to believe that that slim frame held much more strength and durability than I could ever hope to replicate.
What drew my attention, however, were her movements.
Ethereal was the only word I could think of to describe her usual way of moving, every little shift of her body effortlessly graceful and controlled.
And yet…. The more I looked now the more something felt off—a faint hesitance in her movements I couldn't quite put into words. Her movements were still fluid, but there was a deliberateness to them now, like she was testing each step before fully committing.
They were… cautious. It was almost unnoticeable, but every action was a little slow compared to what it had been before she left for her bath
Maybe it was just my imagination, but I couldn't help but think that something had changed.
Luckily, she didn't seem to notice my lapse in attention. She was looking out of a window, her eyes distant, lost.
"Is everything okay?" I asked, a little concerned. The fragility she had shown Astraea before dinner was back. Is she still worried about Cassandra and Daphne?
Her eyes snapped back to me, her attention focusing firmly on my eyes. "Yes, just lost in thought," she said, and approached me. "You said you needed to talk after dinner, so here I am."
I nodded, "Take a seat? I made something to drink, if you want." Lion glanced at the cup of steaming green tea, raising an eyebrow. "I promised it's not poisoned," I joked.
"Even if it was, most poisons wouldn't work on me," she said drily, and took a seat. "Perks of having a high level of Abnormal Resistance."
I hummed, "Sounds useful. That's a Development Ability, right?"
She nodded, "Probably one you won't need to get if you keep your healing artifact with you." She blew on the cup a couple of times, and took a sip. "Bitter," she whispered, but her tone seemed less disgusted and more… filled with nostalgia.
"I can make some other type, if you want," I offered, just in case I misread her. "I was just craving some flavors from back home."
"It's fine, it's not the first time I've had this." I shrugged and took a seat in front of her. Closing my eyes, I took a sip of my own, letting out a sigh of contentment. When I opened my eyes, Lion was looking at me with a small smile. "You Far-Easterners really have curious tastes. I can't ever imagine myself truly enjoying this."
I shrugged, "It's an acquired taste," I said, grinning. "If you keep letting me be in charge of the cooking, I promise you'll come to enjoy the stuff from my land."
"Kaguya tried for years to make us all enjoy your cuisine and she never succeeded. What makes you think you will?"
"That sounds like a challenge."
"Just don't get your hopes up," she shrugged and took another sip, this time letting a grimace come to her face. "So? You didn't invite me just for bitter tea, what is it?"
"Straight to business, then." I nodded, and squared my shoulders. "You heard about what happened in the meeting already, and how I challenged the members of the Apollo Familia."
"And threatened their God, too," Lion added. She tried to keep her tone chastising, but couldn't completely hide the sharp approving glint in her eyes. Like I had thought, she really hadn't appreciated the words Apollo said to Astraea. "What about it? Do you regret doing it, now that you had time to calm down?"
"No, I don't. I certainly regret showing more of my abilities than I needed to, but not my words," I said firmly. Lion nodded, something resembling pride flashing through her eyes. "It's just that-" I grimaced. "I know that I'm not strong." She raised an eyebrow at the non-sequitur.
"Astraea says that I'm advancing extremely fast, that I should be proud of my progress. My advisor feels that I'm rushing, that I'm reckless, and that I should slow down before I commit a mistake that'll kill me." I let go of the teacup and clasped my hands over the table, not wanting to unintentionally crack it with my grip.
"And you don't agree? I've seen Adventurers take years to reach the 10th floor of the Dungeon. You are about to do it in less than a month." Her eyes narrowed. "Your strengthening magic lets you hit way above someone of your Status would, and you are reasonably skilled. And that's without mentioning your healing and your weapon creation. You are doing way better than other Level Ones would."
I nodded, agreeing. "That's the problem, as you said it, I can't compare myself to other Level Ones." I smiled humorlessly. "So far, there's been no monster that truly threatened my life in the Dungeon, and that was with just one Update. After I get the next one? I don't see me getting any challenge from them."
I wasn't bragging, it was just the truth. I hadn't felt that I was in risk of dying even once since that night in the forest. The monsters in the Dungeon were strong, yes, but not something I feared would be able to kill me.
Like Lion said, I had too many advantages compared to others.
There was a moment of silence as she took in my words, her expression growing thoughtful.
"You intend to go lower," she didn't ask. It was the logical conclusion: if you are not being challenged in the Dungeon then you either languish or go lower.
I nodded. "I already went to the ninth with members of the Hephaestus Familia," I said. "But after Astraea updates my Status today, I want to go even lower. To the fifteenth, at least."
"You'll die," she said simply, her eyes narrowed. "Don't underestimate the Dungeon, Emiya. You haven't even got to the twelfth floor, which is the cut off point for Level Ones– some never even reach it–, and yet you want to go to the fifteenth? It's not a matter of skill, you need the boost a Level Up gives to even survive down there."
"Didn't you just say that I can hit above my Status?" I asked, smiling slightly.
"But not above your Level, you fool!" she exclaimed and gritted her teeth when I didn't respond.
After a few moments she let out a deep sigh and massaged her temple. "If this is about Lord Apollo's Familia, you don't need to worry," When she looked at me next, her eyes were cold and sharp, like a blade. "The moment they step out of line, I will intervene, I promise you." Then her voice softened. "Don't kill yourself trying to get stronger, Emiya. I am the captain now, I will protect Lady Astraea's Familia and her newfound happiness, with my own hands if I need to."
I felt touched, really, by the sentiment behind her words, but… "Then, who will protect you, Lion? You are Astraea's happiness, as well."
Lion twitched, a slight gasp escaping her.
"We are Astraea's Familia– you included, idiot." I admonished her softly, and she looked at me with surprise. She really is an idiot, she was chiding me without considering herself? "We protect justice in Astraea's name, but we need to protect each other too… and I can't do that if I'm weak as I am now. I caused this whole situation with Apollo, so let me take responsibility."
"You can't protect anyone if you are dead," Lion said, but her voice was weak. She still looked out of sorts, as if the thought of her Familia protecting her became alien to her after a year of loneliness. "And you will definitely die if you go through this, good intentions be damned."
"I know I can be considered reckless, but I don't intend to die," I remarked with an amused smile. "Why do you think I wanted to talk with you tonight? I want you to come with me to the Dungeon."
"...What?"
I nodded, but couldn't help but grimace knowing that I was about to sound pretty hypocritical. "I know I'm not immortal. Even if I have Avalon to heal me from even the deadliest wounds, it still needs magic energy- mind- to activate. The moment mine runs out, I will die, regardless of its healing abilities."
Lion's eyes narrowed, seeming more sure of herself now that she heard the words coming from me.
I continued, regardless. "So, until the moment I know I can definitely survive on my own, will you come with me to the Dungeon? If only to bail me out, should the worst happen?" Selfish and pretty unmanly, I know. I was pretty much saying to her 'protect me, until I can protect you', but I had no other choice if I ever wanted to reach her heights. "If I have a Level Four by my side, I know I will be safe." I shrugged, an awkward smile on my face.
Silence fell between us for a moment. Lion kept watching me, her sharp eyes burrowing deep into mine, seemingly trying to discern something. What, I didn't know, but eventually, the tension in her shoulders faded and she let out a tired sigh.
"I guess it's better than you going on your own like an idiot," she grumbled. "Very well, I'll do it."
I grinned, relieved.
"However," she continued. "I will only intervene if you are about to die. Any less than that and it might interfere with your Excelia gathering." She smirked sharply. "I will consider any other damage you get as Endurance training and won't raise a finger, got it?"
I huffed, Ruthless woman.
"And you won't be able to use any magic crystals you get from the trip, so it will be a day of loss in your money gathering," she remarked, and I nodded, already aware. "The Guild is remarkably astute when catching people that want to stiff them, and me helping you is just that."
"I know, but I think it's worth it. The faster I grow with you, the more money I will be able to gather on my own later."
She nodded back, agreeing.
"Then, we are in agreement," she said. "I have an early shift tomorrow, but before I leave I want to spar with you again– seriously, this time. I want to know what you are really capable of, to know when to intervene in the Dungeon."
What I'm capable of, huh… Weapons circled through my mind's eye. An arsenal that could arm an army at my beck and call… and with my new Aria, more readily available than they had ever been.
I never used my best weaponry in the Dungeon, why would I, when my normal weapons did the trick and cost much less? But in these explorations, I might need to delve into my rarer repertoire.
The ones I can trace, anyway. Most of my better weapons remain elusive– Arondight, Galatine, Rhongomyniad, Excalibur, to name a few–, even after getting a goddess' blood in my veins, but I still had the Noble Phantasms I saw during the Holy Grail War, some of Gilgamesh's collection… and Caliburn, unfitting as a user I might be.
I will show her, then- the depths of my abilities.
I agreed and with another sigh, she downed the final contents of her cup grimacing, and stood up.
"If that's it, I will retire to my room. Lady Astraea is waiting for you in her room for your Update, so don't make her wait." She took a couple steps, but then stopped in the threshold of the room.
When a couple of seconds passed and she remained there, I cocked my head. "Lion?"
"Emiya." I raised an eyebrow at the coldness in her voice. "Lady Astraea might have allowed you to kiss her today, but the moment you try to force her to do anything she's not ready for…" She turned her head, her eyes chips of ice. "We will have words."
I swallowed, trying to moisten my suddenly dry throat. "Ah, she told you," I remarked, feeling some heat gathering in my cheeks in spite of the threatening atmosphere.
"Indeed," she said drily, and I could swear there was a blush on her cheeks. "In excruciating detail."
I cringed, feeling my blush deepen. "Noted, Lion," I answered, anyway. "I won't do anything she doesn't want me to."
"I think that's the problem…" she grumbled under her breath before continuing. "And, of course, if you break her heart, no one will find your body. Are we clear?"
"Crystal." I thought she would leave at that, but she didn't.
"...I should warn you," she said after a moment, her tone hesitant. "Tomorrow I might be even worse at holding back than last time."
My brow furrowed in confusion. "Hm? Did something happen?" Or was she just speaking of her anger at me kissing Astraea?
"Lady Astraea Updated my Status in the bath," she explained, her voice dull. "I'm a Level Five now."
"Ah, congratulations?" I tried to sound sincere, but there was a bitterness in her tone that confused me. It should be a happy moment… right?
"Indeed," she said, and turned. "It seems that sometimes surviving like a worm is enough of a feat to Level up. Who'd have known?"
My eyes widened, and my face paled. "Lion, that's…" I trailed off, frozen by the brittle smile on her face. By the self-hatred in her eyes.
"It's fine, I'm fine," she lied. "Just thought you ought to know, so you can keep your Avalon at the ready. But, well, the man who was brave enough to steal the Goddess of Purity's first kiss should be able to handle it, right?"
And then she left before I could truly react, closing the door behind her and leaving me no time for a response.
I sat back down with a grimace, instantly regretting freezing at that moment, not being able to offer any comfort to the girl my goddess loved.
I grabbed my cup and downed the last of my tea, feeling the bitterness more keenly than ever.
"Then, who will protect you, Lion? You are Astraea's happiness, as well."
Not even a few minutes after I said it, and she proved me a hypocrite.
Like I thought, That woman is ruthless.
-Line Break-
Astraea's room was, in my opinion, a reflection of herself.
The room wasn't cluttered or overly furnished, but it avoided feeling austere or militaristic. Tasteful was the word that came to mind. Relaxing was another.
Even the colors seemed to reflect that atmosphere, nothing too overly bright or garish, soft whites for the curtains, muted blues for the carpets, and rich brown wood for the furniture.
Specks of color were scattered throughout the room—reds, pinks, yellows, violets, and blues in the form of flowers, filling the air with the fragrance I had come to associate with her.
A big armoire made of beautiful brown wood adorned with golden bronze handles stood to the left side of the entrance of the room. At its side there was a dressing table with a wide mirror and on its surface, arranged neatly, were bottles of perfume and a couple of small wooden boxes that contained some jewelry and make-up.
In front of the door, across the room, beneath a wide windowpane, was a coffee table flanked by two comfortable-looking armchairs, their plush velvet cushions looking soft enough to sink into.
And, finally to the right of the entrance, was a four-poster queen-sized bed. A heavy wool quilt was draped neatly across it, and scattered over the top were, in my humble opinion, an unnecessary number of pillows in varying sizes. On either side of the bed stood a nightstand, each with a small lamp, and next to the right-hand stand was a closed door leading to the en-suite bathroom.
And there I was, laying shirtless on my stomach on top of the bed, the quilt under me tickling my body.
Astraea settled herself on my hips, and I could swear I could feel her eyes trace each line of the muscles of my back.
"You don't have to do this," I said softly, looking over my shoulder. "Not now."
"You're too kind, but I do," she answered back, her smile wan. "You are going to fight a Level Five tomorrow, after all."
"But it hurts, doesn't it?"
"Not more than it has ever hurt. It's just more real this time."
We were talking about Lion, of course. Or rather, about her Update.
During Updates, Gods seem to be able to observe the actions their children take while gathering Excelia. Apollo had seen me in Chryseis' Status, and Astraea had seen how many people I rescued over my first week in the Dungeon.
"It seems that sometimes surviving like a worm is enough of a feat to Level up."
And Lion had Leveled Up during the event that killed each and every one of Astraea's other children.
I didn't ask if she was okay, it was obvious she wasn't. I didn't say I was sorry– I did lament their passing, and regret not being able to meet them, but in reality I didn't really know them, not even after all the stories Astraea told me. It would sound like I was giving platitudes. In the end, I decided to do like Fuji-nee once did to me, on the day of Kiritsugu's funeral. I kept my eyes on hers, trying to convey every bit of care I felt for her through them and said, "I'm here for you, always. You know that, right?"
"I do know it," she smiled again, and this time it reached her eyes. "And I'm not doing it just because of obligation. I want to do it." I twitched, when Astraea said the word want her hands splayed across my lower back and traced my spine upwards until they reached my shoulder blades. Her wings. "Would you comfort me, my hero? Balm the wounds of my heart with the light of your soul?"
"I just said it, didn't I? Always." I whispered, trying to calm my thundering heart.
Astraea giggled softly. "You are still tense…" she whispered. "Should I give you a massage afterwards?"
I glanced at her dryly. Her eyes were alight with amusement… and something else, something hot. She knew what she was doing to me, and she was enjoying it. And dressed lightly as she was in that thin nightgown, with the moonlight entering from the window framing her profile… She was a tempting sight. I let out a breath. It is not the time, she's hurting, Emiya.
"Please, just get this over with." I knew she took delight in making me react, but I suspected that she was doing it now to distract herself from her pain. Losing herself in our newfound bond to not drown in her sadness.
"You don't need to be shy, you know?" she said. "But, very well, l shall get this over with." she continued with a gruff voice, raising a needle with her right hand.
I huffed, "Was that supposed to be me?"
"It was! Was it good?" she laughed. I raised an unimpressed eyebrow. "Hmph, everyone's a critic, it seems." And then she pricked her finger, letting a drop of blood fall on my back.
The world bathed in a soft golden glow
Astraea let out a sigh of contentment.
"Oh, oh my." She whispered, her fingers in the air, manipulating a recreation of my Falna made out of light. "You truly are…" she trailed off. Her weight shifted over my hips a couple of times until she settled once more.
Still, her hands moved unimpeded, immortalizing my actions these past few weeks into my skin, turning them into sources of strength.
I stood still, knowing better than to distract her now.
"I begin to see the reason behind your intended recklessness, my hero," she said, after a moment. "The Excelia you gathered the last few days in the Dungeon… The rate started to slow down. It shouldn't really be happening until your Basic Abilities reached rank D, and yet…" she let out a sigh. "It's still a prodigious rate, but now it's only the longer hours you spend in the Dungeon that lets you keep the same pace. You need to go lower, if you want to keep growing at this rate."
I nodded. It seems even before this Update I've been wasting some time. Putting the same effort for lower returns. My brow furrowed. If I truly want to become someone that can protect this city, someone that can protect this new family of mine… then this can't go on. I needed to impress Lion tomorrow, make sure she feels confident in my skill so she does not retract her acceptance.
"Luckily, you still more than make up for it with your actions outside..." she murmured, almost to herself, before grinning. "You Magic once more rose two whole Ranks, and it seems that mock fighting just that one time with Ryuu made your Durability shoot up, as well. Maybe I should have you spar weekly from now on, it seems to work better than the Dungeon."
I shrugged, works for me.
Finally, after a few minutes, she pressed her hands against the floating Falna and pressed it anew onto my back.
I sucked in a breath, feeling my body shift as the experience I gathered flooded my existence. I twitched my fingers, and moved my arms and back muscles experimentally. Even in those slight movements, I felt different. Stronger.
"Trace On." With the hit of the hammer of an imaginary gun, magic energy flooded my body, the streams of mystical energy feeling faster, smoother, better.
"But it's… strange."
"Strange?" I asked, feeling her press a sheet of paper on my back. "What is strange?" I circulated my Od and filled my Magic Circuits, testing their new limits and capabilities.
Astraea removed herself from my back, and I turned around. Sitting on the bed, I raised a hand and looked at it. I moved my fingers, opened and closed my hand, feeling a newfound dexterity in my movements. Maybe if I raise my Dexterity enough, someday I will be as graceful as Lion. I shook my head, feeling silly for the thought, and took the paper Astraea offered me and inspected it.
Name: Shirou Emiya.
Level 1
STR: H137 -> F 326 (+189)
END: H103 -> F 301 (+198)
DEX: H146 ->F 315 (+169)
AGI: I57 -> H 213 (+156)
MAG: G274 -> E 484 (+210)
Magic:
Skills:
{Ashes of a Beautiful Dream}
{Pursuit of an Everdistant Utopia}
Reading it, I could see what she meant. It's been a few weeks since I got my first Update, and I've been going on longer and longer expeditions, fighting monsters that put shame to the goblins I first fought in this world… but the Excelia I earned in this time barely surpassed what I got in just one week the first time.
And it's going to slow down even more. My Magic was about to reach Rank D, and from that Rank on, Excelia is supposedly harder to gather.
"It's something I felt when you used your chant for the first time in Ganesha's home," Astraea said, and pressed herself against me, her head on my shoulder, her left hand going over my stomach and hugging my side. "And just now, when I distributed your Magic Excelia… I felt it again."
"And that is?" I asked, wrapping an arm around her waist and meeting her serious eyes.
"You told me before…that in your world it was normal for gods to have children with mortals, right? That during the Holy Grail War, you faced children of gods?" she asked. "A child of Zeus, and a child of Lugh?" She was looking at me, looking like she was expecting me to grasp what she wanted to say.
I furrowed my brow, not understanding. "I did say that, yes, but what does that have to do with me?"
She watched me for a moment more, but then sighed. "What I felt in you when you declared that Your Body is Made of Blades, was something I only felt in other gods. It was faint, barely there... But it felt like Authority." My eyes widened at her words. …What? "Shirou, my hero…"
"Are you a descendant of a god?"