[A/N: It isn't strictly necessary, but I as the author do recommend reading the prologue.]
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I wish someone had said, "You shouldn't be poking murphy in the eye like that," to me in the last moments of my life.
Of course, I probably would have laughed them off and happily proceeded with dooming myself to fifteen minutes of agonizing pain regardless. With a little sprinkle of death.
As the memory of that unbearable pain leaked into my thoughts, my eyes moistened up, my nose filled up with snot and my face involuntarily scrunched up. I quickly shifted my focus to count the wooden planks in the roof above my head. After all, I could not move my head, or any part of my body significantly, for that matter.
Calm down, loopy me. Don't dehydrate.
It had been a week, probably, since my new life started here.
Whatever 'here' meant.
It was hard to keep track of time when all your focus was dedicated to not pissing yourself.
Essentially, I knew very little about where I was right now. Or when, assuming some timey-whimey stuff was going on.
Regardless, in all that time, I had barely moved of my own volition. At most, I could waddle my fat chubby fingers and toes and... that's about it. Yeah.
A few times a day, a beautiful and gentle giant would come around to feed me delicious milk.
From a bottle, with a sucker cap on it.
So, not my new mother. She could be a nanny, though.
The lady was somewhere in her mid twenties, well endowed in all the right places and overall beautiful with waist long crimson hair.
On the first day I opened my eyes as myself, I grew spooked being picked up by an entity ten times my size. But I soon realized what was happening and blushed, with my baby heart pumping baby blood faster and faster.
Needless to say, I was quite disappointed and ashamed in myself that day.
That day, I suckled on the sucker cap with all the righteous vengeance my toothless gums could muster, and swore to always be a gentleman to this woman till the moment I die. Again.
She would oftentimes rock me to sleep, and sometimes just continue to stare at me from the side of my crib.
Remembering her affectionate expression, I grew giddy as I felt a smile forming on my face and a high pitched giggle escaped my tiny lips. Again, involuntarily.
Damn, when can I control myself again?
Ever since I had gained a new life in this body a week or so ago, I have been in a constant tug of war with my body and mind. If I tried to control my mind and not be a loopy mood-swinging mess, my body would rebel by leaking stinky unmentionables. And if I tried to keep my bowels under check, a random memory would pop up. And needless to say, some tears would spill. Sometimes both. Yikes.
At least I am proud to mention that I have yet to throw up. But that was such a low bar that I felt pathetic about my current lifestyle all over again...
Stop. Breathe. Get yourself together, damn it!
In short, it had been a rough week. Oh well, I've seen rougher...
Changing the direction of my thoughts for the dozenth time today, I thought about my current situation again from a different perspective.
It wasn't all bad. I got to lay down all day, and as far as I was concerned, it was a much needed break after literal years of unending procrasti-Ahem! work. Unending work. Yes.
In any case, there wasn't much to go off of, the light sources were fairly limited, being reliant on sunlight and occasional candles at night. In fact, it's hard to see a couple of feet in the dark of the night, tickling my imaginations in all sorts of ways. Thankfully, I don't need to suffer much before dreamless sleep takes me. Baby perks, I guess.
In the ease of life department, there was no running water, but at least there was water, thankfully.
I was covered in a thick wool-like cloth with small gloves on my hands and feet. Probably due to the silent chill permeating in the air. I had yet to see the outside of this room, further crediting the outside being non-baby-friendly. Probably winter.
My bottom continued to itch due to the scratchy cloth tied around it. But it wasn't something I could do anything about. There were also no diapers, but then again, thankfully, the gentle giant would come immediately when my body misbehaved. All I needed to do was recall the pain and let my loopy self loose.
Heh,
There were two another, littler giants around. Whenever the gentle giant wasn't nearby, one or both of the little giants would keep watch over me. Not to say the little ones weren't gentle, but I never let them touch me.
Sometimes they would try to poke me, but a little scrunching of my face and watery eyes was enough to keep them away. Most of the time, at least.
One of them, the littlest one, would always try to test my boundaries by jumping all around me. Thankfully, the littler giant would come to my rescue and keep the littlest one's fingers off me.
Could they be my brothers? Or perhaps the nanny's children. I wonder where my birth-mother and father are though. Quite careless of them to just leave me be like this.
It wasn't like I was missing them or anything, after all, I had never met them in the first place. Everyone here would be an equal stranger to me regardless of who they were.
In fact, I never even witnessed my own childbirth, I just woke up directly in the crib, nice and prim. I didn't know when the newborns start to be aware of themselves, but I do feel like I should at least partially remember my first cry.
My source of knowledge wasn't very trust worthy, being fictional novels and all, but assuming the authors did their research, I should be waking up screaming my behind off, covered in blood and feces.
Not that I was complaining, but I did suspect there were some sort of complications during my childbirth.
As a born nerd in both the worlds, I kept analyzing my situation and comparing it with all my knowledge on reincarnation novels. Again, they weren't very trust worthy, but it wasn't like I had the privilege of opening up a kiki page or a deddit thread.
First of all, I didn't have a system. I already checked by screaming 'Status!' in my mind a dozen times. So, no luck in that department, atleast not till my vocal cords develop enough for all my words to not come out as a high pitched gargle. Second, as far as I have seen the lady and the boys, I couldn't tell if they had anything hinting at magic or stats of any sort.
A shame, really. I would have liked a little magic.
Moving on, the time period felt like it could be something medieval. Lacking electricity and the 'usual' ease of life commodities. So, no mechas for me. Again, a crying shame.
Except for the crying part. I already have that one in spades.
Fourthly, I have yet to figure what the three giants are actually saying.
I could hear them perfectly clear. I heard somewhere that hearing was developed mostly in the womb. The problem was in understanding what I was hearing. I tried understanding what I heard, but the meaning always escaped me. It was like watching anime in french with no subtitles. Annoying.
But I wasn't deterred. I wouldn't be me if I got scared by a new language in a literal reincarnation setting.
And reincarnation, what is less magical than living after dying? Nothing! Even a certain miracle performer said so.
This baby would magic, one way or the other!
But for now, this baby needs his beauty sleep...