Darren's Perspective
"Then Kyoto…" I mumbled as my voice trailed off.
I tried to remember exactly how the capital switch happened but I was pretty sure half of this was stuff from videos on youtube after I had stormed out of class that day.
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"Alright, so the Fujiwara regency…" I continued. I was starting to get tired and thirsty.
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"But then they were ousted, and…" I explained. At this point my throat was dry and I hadn't slept in a while.
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"If you ask me, the Genpei War…" I continued to speak as I summarized the conflict that was history to me but news to this guy who has apparently been either fighting or chained up for way too long.
I wonder what it's like to be a samurai out of time AND space. Worlds away from what you knew.
Except I was going to be a samurai right?
Wasn't I both of those things too and one away from the third?
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"And that's the end of the Heian period," I finished, my voice hoarse from recounting centuries of history. My brain felt fried, my throat parched. "I'm really tired. Can I learn some swordsmanship now? Better yet, can I get some water?"
Kirin Edo stared at me.
He waved his hand and all of a sudden my throat stopped burning and my stomach was empty rather than feeling like it was trying to murder me.
He looked baffled and his frown deepened. "Samurai ruling the country?" he scoffed and shook his head. "Extremely combat capable advisors and guards turning into 'shoguns'? Shogunate? Such absolute nonsense! I wouldn't want most of them in a position of actual rulership if it bit them right on their ass. Give most of them a good fight and a wise ruler to serve any day, but excuse me, I don't think most samurai actually learned leadership, let alone rulership."
He paused as his brow creased thoughtfully and he frowned. "Still, I suppose the strong are often cunning as well. Can't say I'm surprised they found a way to claw their way to the top. Maybe I wasn't the only one good enough to be an emperor after all."
But then his dark eyes narrowed, his face hardening into a mask of thunderous rage. "But swords have become illegal?!" he roared, "That's a different story and it's a story that I need to hear! I need to hear it so that I can shove the story up my former country's ass. Continue with your history lesson, Successor. I need to know how such a travesty could have occurred."
"Oi, come on, ol' guy, ol' buddy, ol' teacher, ol'sensei! ol'whaanywayyyUUUhg-?!" My complaint was cut short as a searing pain shot through my leg.
I looked down to see the Sword God Emperor's hand clamped around my ankle, his grip like a vice that was perfectly okay with shattering bone and breaking reality to pretend it didn't happen.
I continued to protest verbally if not coherently as I was yanked around.
Before I could even react, he spun me around a few more times and my world dissolved into a dizzying blur of colors and shapes.
Then I hurtled headfirst into a rip in reality.
The world spun around me.
A cracked kaleidoscope of colors on crack and EDM music along with sensations that would make the standard eldritch abomination enjoyer cringe surrounded me as I felt like I went the long way around a nuclear war infused time-space-ass-crack sparta-kick only to encounter azatoth's sleeping form.
And nearly goddamn wake him.
I nearly vomited as I was flung through the reality-trip and exited into the air.
I finally tumbled through the air like a ragdoll.
As expected the sudden halt was jarring.
I bounced and rolled across the ground of what felt like sand and stopped a bit near a dune.
Then, with a bone-jarring slam I landed in the soft and sandy ground.
I wheezed as the breath had been knocked out of me and for a moment I was sure my body was pasted across the ground with what should have been at least several broken bones.
I'm pretty sure my teacher just brought me to the edge of death.
I lay there, dazed and disoriented as the taste of the desert filled my mouth.
I spat the ground back where it was supposed to be- not in my mouth and finished my joke.
"Who is also Italian, what can I do for you to get me some training?" I even had the Irish accent down. Can you at least let me finish the joke. "Bastard."
I forced myself to sit up as my head refused to stop swimming a marathon around the gym pool of reality.
In the distance I saw a sprawling city silhouetted against the horizon.
Shiganai, I thought.
My memory was hazy from the abrupt transition, but the fifth former capital of the empire was kind of iconic.
Kirin Edo's voice boomed from a shimmering portal that had opened in the air above me, a window into that strange, ethereal prison where he was held captive. "I can't leave this damned hole, but you can! So do me a favor and stop being weak. I corrected your bones for optimal swordsmanship, by the way. No need to thank me."
The fact that he wasn't just smashing me around for fun was relieving- but- "Fuck you."
He chuckled and then he gestured towards the city in the distance. "Your first goal is to head over there and learn the sword from a proper Japan-adjacent society. It's five years before I plucked you from your timeline, so if your goal is to prevent the deaths of your companions and everyone else you care about, you'd better get started. Make a mess, Darren. It's good for you."
He smirked with eyes that laughed to a joke that probably made sense to only the oldest of old bastards with too much damn hair, I was sure., "With your 'oops, am I alive again?' ability, you can always rewind a day or two if things go south. Get to my standard before I start your real training. You can thank me later."
The portal snapped shut, leaving me alone in the sandy expanse. I stood up and brushed the dirt off my clothes. I noticed a katana lying beside me. Clearly this was a parting gift from the Sword God Emperor.
"What a pretentious title..." I muttered as I picked up the katana. It felt surprisingly light and well-balanced in my hand. The 'Japan-adjacent' society Kirin Edo was talking about was clearly the empire, but why this city?
I shook my head.
I could wonder what was so special about the fifth capital of the Shin empire later.
I had a feeling this sword was going to be my best friend for the next five years.
If he picked this place randomly I would be surprised.
…..
Darren would be surprised.
By many things.