I liked girls before; I even had a girlfriend. But I never truly understood what love meant until I met her. To be honest, I don't think it was love at first sight like in those cliched stories—though maybe it was, and I just didn't want to admit it.

It was just after I turned 22 when I saw her. She approached me since we were both from the same hometown, stranded in an unfamiliar world with no family or friends. We connected instantly and then deeper and deeper; my feelings for her never stopped growing. Her pure, beautiful eyes always seemed to draw me into an endless abyss. She took liberties with me, holding my hand and kissing my cheeks, while I told myself it was impossible for someone as pretty as her to like someone like me, drowning in self-pity and hatred. I always fell short of showing her the love she deserved. I took everything for granted, and eventually, she gave up.

The thought that I couldn't hold the girl I loved in my arms tormented me through long nights. The idea of never seeing her smiling face again made it hard to breathe. I regret it; alas, they say there is no cure for regret, and time is absolute—it doesn't wait for anyone, let alone turn back. Now, at 24, I've kept these feelings bottled up inside. I wish you could forgive me. It's not that you weren't beautiful enough or that I didn't love you; I just wasn't enough of a man to handle your feelings. Deep down, I still long for you, but I know that just as I didn't accept your feelings back then, you won't accept mine now. Know that I have always loved you, and I wish my feelings could reach you. If only I could have a second chance! But, as Eminem said, opportunities come once in a lifetime.

I saw you with another man, and it almost took my breath away. It was then that you had enough of my pathetic self. I couldn't blame you. Sometimes I try to tell myself my heart is dead, that I could never love you or anyone else again. But whenever I see your smile in pictures, my heart skips a beat. If there is one thing I regret in my life, it's never telling you how I felt when I had the chance and never shooting my shot. If we ever meet again, I wish you would give me another chance. This time, I will prove to you and everyone the man I have become. Please reach her with this heartfelt message. They say when feelings are strong enough, they can even reach the skies. My heart is for you and only you.

Do you remember when you said you wanted my eyes? I would give them to you without a second thought. If anyone were to hurt you, I would unleash my wrath upon them, making them feel a hundred times your pain. I would become the demon lord Bai Quinlong for you, for you are my Rong'er—my heart has longed for the warmth of yours through a hundred years of wind and frost.

The second thing I regret is having a girlfriend after you left. I tried to move on, to forget you, and love her instead. But she never moved my heart. It's not that she wasn't beautiful enough or didn't try; she just wasn't you. It was my fault for thinking I could forget you by being with her. I only ended up hurting her, which was never my intention. Without realizing it, I became the type of person I had always despised—the one who plays with others' feelings. Eventually, I told her the truth, and she chose to break up. I realized my mistake and tried to redeem myself. I hope she can forgive me and find someone deserving of her love and kindness. Only you are the one for me.

You probably know whom I'm talking about. This is me: a man of many shortcomings, a hopeless romantic, and a fool—a writer whose fragile heart has weathered many emotional storms, yet whose eyes have never shed a tear. They say a man's tears are worth gold. I say that's true, but only my heart is shedding tears of blood. If I could, I would give a mountain of gold to have you by my side.

As we grow, we learn. Looking back now, I realize that I was never your first choice or even your second. But back then, in my heart, there were no choices—there was only you. I guess I'm the kind of man who, once his heart is set on someone, cannot change it. But I am not obsessive. They say that if you love someone who doesn't love you back, you must let them go; that is the greatest show of love. That is how I wanted to show you my love. I want to express my feelings and then let go of everything to finally move on.

I know I can't be with you. Even if my heart wants you, my mind can't accept it. This is the hard choice I've made. Yes, this is my story. They say that first love hurts the most, but I say that's not true. Nothing hurts more than true love. I found it and wasted my chance. To anyone hearing or reading my story: don't make my mistake. Don't hold back your feelings; show them to the other person. Don't waste time overthinking. Take a leap of faith. After all, time cures all wounds—except regret. So, live life to the fullest. Get rejected, but don't let regret consume your soul. It eats away at you slowly until only small fragments of your old self remain.

I wish upon the stars that my unfulfilled love will see the light of day one day, and that everyone who reads this doesn't have to experience what I have.