Xhani's POV
My body froze. I couldn't believe what I'd just heard. Did Zain seriously say he'd get rid of the baby? Was he serious?
Gently, I pulled away from his hug, eyes still brimming with tears.
"What did you say, Zain?" I asked.
"I know you're not ready for this, Princess. It's a big responsibility, and it comes with a lot of headaches and sacrifices," he said, pulling my head back against his chest.
I didn't say anything. My heart felt shattered. I didn't want to lose this child.
"W-what if I don't want to get rid of the baby?" I asked, my voice cracking.
"Let's go inside first," he said, putting an arm around my waist and guiding me toward the kitchen. Carefully, he lifted me onto a chair and then fetched a cold water bottle from the fridge.
He handed me the water, gesturing for me to take a sip. After I did, he placed it on the table.
"Look, Princess, I know you're scared. You have every right to be. Pregnancy isn't easy. It's a lot of work. You'd have to drop out of school, give up your career plans, and provide for the child," he said, his tone calm.
"I'm not ready to be a father. I have dreams and ambitions. I want to graduate high school, play for the national team, travel the world… And I want to be able to support you and any child we have. But right now, I'm not in that position," Zain continued, holding my hand. "Please hear me out. I love you, and I always will. Of course I want a family with you someday, but not for the next few years. I need to focus on my career, and we both need to finish high school first. Then I promise we can start our little family."
I just stared blankly at the ground. I couldn't believe he didn't want this baby, that he was asking me to end it. Part of me understood—he made sense. But I'd hoped we could face anything together. Knowing he didn't want this responsibility made me feel selfish for even considering keeping it.
"Please tell me you're thinking the same thing," Zain said, breaking into my thoughts.
"Yes, you're right. We have to be practical," I said with a faint smile.
"Great. I'll take you to the hospital tomorrow, and we'll get rid of this," he said, hugging me and kissing my neck softly.
At some point, I drifted off. When I woke up, I felt warmth. I lifted my head to find myself in bed, with Zain lying next to me, his arm around my waist.
Gently, I slipped from under his arm and tiptoed to the bathroom, closing the door so I wouldn't wake him. I approached the sink, staring at my reflection. But I didn't see myself. I saw a murderer, blood staining my hands. That image tore a scream from my throat as I slid to the floor beneath the mirror, curling into a ball.
Zain rushed in and found me there. He quickly wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into his lap.
"Shhh, it's okay, Princess. I'm here," he reassured me, but I was too shaken.
"I'm a murderer, Zain!" I cried out, screaming the words.
"No, you're not. Look at me," he said, lifting my chin until I met his gaze. "You're not a murderer, Princess. The baby isn't even formed yet—it's just a seed. You're not killing anyone," he murmured, holding me tightly and rocking me back and forth until I calmed down.
After about ten minutes, he lifted me in his arms and carried me to the bathtub. He ran warm water and gently stripped my clothes off, adding a peach-colored bath bomb. Then he took off his clothes and stepped in with me, running his fingers across my skin, rinsing my body in the lukewarm water.
Forty minutes passed in soothing silence before he helped me out, towel-drying me. I couldn't help but smile at how tenderly he cared for me. Perhaps he was right—this was for the best.
Once we were dressed, he led me to the kitchen. He busied himself making breakfast. We ate quietly until Zain broke the silence.
"I've booked an appointment for the abortion today," he said. Caught off guard, I started coughing. Quickly, he handed me some water.
"Don't be scared, Princess. I'll be there with you the whole time," he said, kissing my forehead.
After breakfast, I put on a simple dress.
We went to the hospital, where Zain had arranged to meet his friend, a doctor. We waited in his office until the doctor arrived, a man in his thirties with short black hair, big muscles, and striking blue eyes.
He gave me a small nod before walking over and hugging Zain. Then he turned to me. "Hi, I'm Dr. Collin. I'll be taking care of you today," he said politely.
"Hi, I'm Xhani. Thank you," was all I could say.
"It's been a while, Zain," Dr. Collin said.
"You know me—been busy with practice and school," Zain replied.
"All right, everything's ready in the operating room. Any questions before we start?" Dr. Collin asked.
I shook my head.
"Okay, great. This won't take long. It'll be uncomfortable, maybe painful, but we'll give you the best care we can," Dr. Collin said.
We headed to the operating room, where they asked Zain to wait outside. Dr. Collin instructed me to lie on the bed and spread my legs. He secured my ankles in stirrups so I couldn't close them.
Nerves assaulted me—I'd never been naked in front of a doctor like this. Dr. Collin gathered a few tools and disappeared between my legs. I felt a sudden sharp pain in my vagina. His approach was rough; it felt like he was drilling a hole inside me.
I screamed as he pushed deeper with his instruments, tears streaming down my cheeks. After what felt like an eternity, the procedure ended.
Exhausted, I lay back and closed my eyes, trying to relax. Dr. Collin left my legs in the stirrups and stepped out of the room. Confused, I felt my eyes grow heavy. Just as I was about to fade into unconsciousness, I heard two voices. I couldn't make out most of the conversation, but I did catch:
"Can I have a taste of her? Since I'm doing this free of charge and off the medical records?"
Then darkness took me.