Lately, I had been feeling different. It was as if something inside me was changing with every training session, every moment I spent with Eris.
In the past, she would always annoy me, constantly teasing me like it was second nature. But now...
Now, it felt like I was opening my eyes for the first time.
Her smile...
Her mannerisms...
The way she motivated me...
All of it reminded me of someone.
But I couldn't figure out who.
---
A Mysterious Note
Reina had been giving us a bit more breathing room lately. The training was still intense, but at least we had a few hours to rest. That day, by chance, I noticed that Eris' room door was slightly open.
Normally, I wouldn't mess with other people's belongings. But inside, something caught my eye.
A notebook.
Was this… Eris' diary?
I should have ignored it. But something held me back.
I just stood there, staring at it.
As I reached for the book, an uneasy feeling crept up inside me, but curiosity won in the end.
"Maybe just reading a little won't hurt?"
I thought to myself.
The first few pages were ordinary. Complaints about training, how strict Reina was, occasional frustrations about me…
But then—
---
A Familiar Past
As I flipped through the pages, a sentence stopped me in my tracks.
"He was sitting alone in the rain. For the first time, I felt like I should hold an umbrella for someone."
My blood ran cold.
My eyes locked onto those words.
"Rain… Umbrella…?"
I kept reading.
"I smiled at him, but he didn't look at me. He seemed really sad, but I didn't know why. I just felt that if I didn't say something at that moment, I would regret it."
My heart pounded in my chest.
My breathing grew shallow.
This…
This was my past.
---
A Shocking Truth
I turned the page.
"That day, I told him, 'The world isn't that bad.' I think he was surprised to hear it. Or maybe he just didn't believe me. But at the very least, I wanted him to know that he wasn't alone at that moment."
My hands trembled.
"Then, I had to move away. I couldn't tell him, but I was really sad."
I couldn't read anymore.
It felt like my legs gave out as I sat on the edge of the bed.
Could this really be true?
Eris…
Was she that girl?
For years, there had been an emptiness inside me. I had always looked back, wondering. The girl who had pulled me out of the darkness, the one who made me feel something again—I had never forgotten her. But I had convinced myself that I would never see her again.
And now…
All this time, she had been right beside me.
I had been annoyed by her laughter countless times. I had been frustrated by her teasing.
But now, I realized—
Her presence had always given me strength.
Without her…
Back then, and even now…
I wouldn't be who I am.
---
Facing My Own Feelings
I slowly closed the diary and put it back in its place.
Should I tell Eris?
Or should I pretend I didn't know?
My heart was pounding wildly.
As thoughts swirled in my mind, I stepped out of the room.
And at that exact moment, Eris appeared in front of me.
"Eh? What are you doing?" she asked.
I looked at her.
At that moment, I saw her in a completely different light.
The person who had motivated me time and time again…
The girl who had changed me from the very beginning…
But I couldn't say a word.
I tried to smile, but I couldn't.
Eris tilted her head. "Lorien? Are you sick? Your face looks weird."
Me? Sick?
No.
I just…
Didn't know what to feel.
This was the end of the chapter.
But for me, everything was just beginning.