Chereads / Cultivation Live: My Audience is the Multiverse! / Chapter 3 - Chapter 3: Cursed Armor and Chaotic Subscribers

Chapter 3 - Chapter 3: Cursed Armor and Chaotic Subscribers

Scene 1: The Armor's Sentient Shenanigans

The cursed armor clamped onto Luo Fan's body, its spikes digging into his skin. A gruff voice echoed in his mind:

Cursed Armor:

"FINALLY! A meat puppet! Let's bathe in blood, mortal! Start with that icy wench chasing us!"

Luo Fan (sprinting through the forest):

"No blood-bathing! And stop moving my legs—I'm the one running!"

The armor cackled, forcing Luo Fan to backflip over a fallen tree as Ling Yue's ice spears shattered the ground behind him.

**[User [BloodyCultivator] Comment: "This is peak content! 10/10 would donate again."]**

Luo Fan (yelling at the hologram):

"You're all monsters!"

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Scene 2: Negotiating with the Saintess

Luo Fan skidded to a halt at a cliff's edge. Ling Yue landed gracefully on her phoenix, her frost Qi forming icicles in the air.

Ling Yue (coldly):

"Return my hairpin, thief, and I'll make your death quick."

Luo Fan (raising his hands):

"Look, I didn't want to steal it! My… uh… artifact made me!"

He gestured to the hologram. Ling Yue squinted at the floating screen.

**[User [SimpLord] Donated 1,000 SC: "Tell her she's pretty! Maybe she'll spare you!"]**

Luo Fan (desperate):

"Also, you're very pretty! Stunning! A-plus cheekbones!"

Ling Yue (blushing furiously):

"Y-You think this flattery will save you?!"

The cursed armor chose that moment to lurch forward, forcing Luo Fan into a bow so deep his nose scraped the dirt.

Cursed Armor:

"GROVEL, MORTAL! Maybe she'll adopt you as her pet!"

Ling Yue (stunned silence): "…What is that armor?"

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Scene 3: The Sponsor's Twist

Before Luo Fan could answer, the hologram flashed:

**[Ding! Sponsor "Shadow Demon Sect" Bonus Objective: "Kiss the Saintess to Lift the Curse!" Reward: 20,000 SC!]**

Luo Fan (whispering):

"Are you kidding me?!"

Ling Yue (noticing his panic):

"What did it say? Tell me!"

Luo Fan (standing abruptly):

"Nothing! Just… admiring your phoenix! So fluffy! Can I pet it?"

The phoenix hissed, spewing frost that froze Luo Fan's left foot.

Cursed Armor:

"PATHETIC! Let me take over! I'll bite her phoenix's tail!"

Luo Fan (wrestling control):

"No biting! No kissing! No—"

The armor lunged. Ling Yue drew her sword.

**[User [ChaosEnjoyer] Donated 5,000 SC: "WORTH IT!"]**

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Cliffhanger Ending

As Luo Fan and the armor tumbled toward Ling Yue, the hologram blared:

**[Ding! Viral Achievement: "Most Chaotic Streamer" Unlocked! Reward: "Demonic Twerking Technique"!]**

Luo Fan (horrified):

"I'd rather die!"

**[System Alert: Technique auto-equips during near-death scenarios. Enjoy!]**

The armor's spikes began to… shimmy.

Luo Fan (screaming):

"NOOOOO—!"

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