[ This is a story of Ivan, two years before Shac meets the Yellow Duckling. ]
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"Uh… Did I forget about something?" Ivan scratched his head, struggling to recall what seems an important thing. He was outside, taking a walk towards to school, but something was bothering him. Suddenly, he stopped.
Mhm… can't remember it, must be something unimportant. He can't remember it.
Troubled, he continued his way, disregarding the thing that he can't recall. As he is walking, he finds himself looking at the vast area of grasses on the side of the road. If I were a goat, this place would be heaven.
Suddenly, he made a stop, he saw something that caught his eye. "Is that…" He raised his eyebrows, focusing on what seems to be a small creature in the grasses.
Curious by the sight, he made his way to the grasses to approach the small creature, it didn't take too long before he reached it. And grabbing it is easier, as it didn't try to run. "Well well… what are you doing here alone?" The small yellow duckling is on his palm, sitting, looking at Ivan.
"Doesn't look like you have anyone nearby here, but that shouldn't be the case." He tried looking around once again, but couldn't see another single duck. "There's no one nearby…"
How did he even manage to roam around here alone?
With the class is starting soon, he gently placed the duckling back to the grass. "Take care." He said, as he bid farewell.
"quack!"
Just as he was about to head back to the road, the duckling's quack of the duckling made him look back. "Oh…"
Seeing the tiny yellow duckling again, he smiled. "Bye." Ivan once again said goodbye to the duckling.
Now, bidding farewell to each other, they each walk to their respective destination.
× × × × × × × × × ×
That night, Ivan went to bed feeling contented. The encounter with the duckling had brightened his day in an unexpected way. But, as the clock hits midnight, everything changed.
"Ah!?" Ivan's eyes snapped open, a silent scream trapped in his throat. His lungs felt like they were burning, desperate for air, but couldn't get it no matter how he tried.
Sweat drenched his body, even when trying to clutch his chest violently, he couldn't get any air in. He was not able to breathe.
I can't… breathe…
Panic surged through his body, and his heart pounds violently. Slowly, the darkness of the room seemed to close in, suffocating him further.
"U…gh…" His fingers clawed at his throat, leaving red marks as he desperately fought for oxygen.
SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT.SHIT
His vision began to blur, and darkness surrounds behind the edges of his eyes. The quiet night was interrupted by his violent breaths and the rustling of sheets as he thrashed around.
This is it, he thought. Feeling the terror from his soul. I'm… dying.
Ivan's body began to convulse, his eyes rolling back as the lack of oxygen took its toll. He tried to call out, to scream for help, but no sound escaped his lips.
The world started to fade, slowly, as his consciousness slowly slips away.
× × × × × × × × × ×
"Haaah…" Gasping, he sat up in bed. "What was that!?"
Ivan couldn't understand what just happened, but it didn't stop him from trying to breathe in for air. "I'm… fine?"
The next day passed in a state of confusion and uneasiness, as he had just woken up from being suffocated due to the lack of air.
Breathe in, breathe out, multiple times, it looks like everything is fine… He is still alive.
Was that a dream? He wondered, unable to distinguish dream from reality. Yet one thing was certain, the incredible pain he felt that night, it was real.
But when midnight came again, the same terrifying experience repeated.
And again the next night.
And the next.
Again
By the fifth night, Ivan was distressed. He tried staying awake, but exhaustion always overpowered him, and midnight without any fail, brought the familiar and terrifying sensation of suffocation.
Again.Again
On the tenth night, he left his home, hoping a change of location would break the cycle. But it didn't.
It didn't. It didn't. It didn't.
It didn't work, nothing seemed to work, nothing seems to be working, nothing seems to be working right.
Again.Again.Again
After nearly two weeks of nightly deaths, Ivan's mind was deteriorating. Each night was a exact copy of the last one, always ending in that moment of breathless terror.
But what can he do? He doesn't know, there's no way he would know. How many times has he died now? He'd lost count of it.
Each death, each suffocating moment, was glued into his mind like a scar. The panic, the helplessness, the terrifying sensation of life slipping away… it all came rushing back as he once again woke up.
Ivan stumbled out of bed, his legs were shaking. But he gathered his remaining strength to approach the cold wind from outside the window, hoping to slow down his thoughts a bit.
He sighed deeply. "When will this end?" He muttered, a hint of sadness and tiredness from his voice.
Outside, the sun began to rise, unaware of his pain, not noticing that there is a person stuck on the same day for a week.
I wonder when will I get out of this day.
He walked slowly towards the bathroom. As he stood near in the bathroom mirror, a stranger stared back at him. "This is… how I look now?" He laughed nervously, noticing that he was not himself anymore.
His eyes are sleepy, and there are already dark circles beneath his eye. And a face that shows exhaustion and terror, it's not the same him. He looked at himself again, feeling sadness upon seeing this different version of himself.
Hah… I should take a walk…
Seeing his miserable state, it made sense for him to take a walk. Otherwise, he would just be rotting inside the house, doing nothing, and waiting for himself to die again.
"Ahhhh…" Ivan walked, head tilted back, unsure of what to do. He wandered aimlessly, without a plan, simply wanting to take a breather. The vast grasses stretched out before him, and as always a calm sight. And there, just as he knew it would be, was the duck roaming around.
But something was different. The tiny yellow duckling he'd first seen as a duckling, grew into adult. Even as Ivan repeated the same 24 hours over and over, the fact that the duckling was able to grow is something he didn't not expect.
Now it's white… Is that even possible?
He tried to find a reason, but nothing seems to work, after all being stuck in a loop is already crazy.
"But, does this mean that the duck was unaffected by the loop?" He muttered, trying to think of the mystery of the duck's growth.
The duck seemed to be the only thing constantly changing…
Seeing that it grew despite me repeating the same day…
There might be something about the duckling…
"But even so…" Ivan paused and looked at the duck in the distance. "I don't see myself being able to get out." He sighed deeply, feeling helpless.
Nothing seemed to be working for Ivan's mind as he continued walking. He walked and walked until night began to fall.
As darkness fell, a familiar feeling wrapped itself around Ivan's gut. Scared, terrified, nervous...
Death was coming,. Again.
He thought about all his futile attempts to escape, trying not to sleep, changing locations, but the result was always the same. Always suffocation. Always terror. Always death.
When midnight arrived, he was once again suffocated to death.
Again.Again.Again.Again.Again.Again.Again
× × × × × × × × × ×
Then, one day, everything changed.
Fuck! Why am I here again?
Once again, Ivan walked aimlessly, as if someone had been telling him all this time to walk, walk, and walk in the same direction.
The same morning, the same road, and… the same vast area of grass, where the duck could always be seen wandering.
What am I doing here? He asked himself, unsure of what he was supposed to be doing. Losing the ability to think straight, he found himself doing nothing but walking in a straight line.
But his body was fine. He didn't need to eat, and he didn't feel weak either. So, what was the problem?
I don't know… His mind was eager to escape this body, but it was still trapped, unable to do anything.
But, as always, it was as if someone was pulling the strings behind his back. Once again, he found himself staring at the duck in the grass.
What!?
There was something different about it… Hhe noticed something about the duck that he wasn't familiar to.
He ran toward the duck. "What happened?" He asked himself as he approached the motionless duck lying on the grass.
To his surprise, what he found was a dead white duck.
Wait, what? Why is it dead? Looking around, there was nothing that could have attacked the duck. He checked the body, no wounds, no blood. But then he noticed something out of place.
"An egg? Huh…" He muttered, puzzled by the sight of the egg. "This shouldn't be the case…"
This was the first time he found an egg behind the duck, and combined with the duck lying motionless in the grass, it was even more confusing.
"I guess…" He rested, looking up at the sky. "Today is different, huh?"
Seeing the strange things happening to the duck, he never expected to find it lifeless or to discover an egg, it's the least thing he expected to happen. Although he was looping through the same day, only the duck had been constantly changing, growing day by day.
But it shouldn't be old enough to die, it's only been about two weeks… There's no way it died for no reason.
With trembling hands, Ivan picked up the egg. "I guess I'll take you to a new home." He decided to return to the house, carefully holding the duck's egg.
For the first time in a while, something different had happened. A faint smile appeared on his face as he walked, momentarily forgetting the death that is surrounding him.
× × × × × × × × × ×
Midnight has passed, and Ivan slept deeply, unaware of the difference that night. For the first time in what felt like forever, he didn't die. He woke up without any memory of dying or the usual terror.
"Did I…" He whispered, then he immediately ran towards the kitchen. But when he arrived, something was missing, the egg was gone. It's gone!?
"Did you eat the egg, Evie?" Ivan asked nervously.
"Yeah." his sister responded casually.
"Why did you eat it!?" Ivan's voice cracked with disbelief.
His sister shrugged, oblivious to the egg's significance. "I was hungry."
Ivan stood frozen, staring at her. As he struggled to process what had just happened, his legs gave out, and he dropped into a chair. It was still early in the morning, but it was as if exhaustion came over him and drained his energy.