*****
"I knew you'd fall for it"
That sentence pierced deep into my heart.
"You are so boringggg. You should thank me for real. I'm doing you a favour trust me. Your life is boring. I can't believe you actually thought Raymond was going to marry you. All those times you'd brag about Raymond to me, I felt so jealous. You didn't deserve someone like him. Ray deserves much more better. Like me. I'm beautiful and out of the shell. I'm not cooked up like you. I'm free.". She said and looked at me.
"Awww poor baby", Raymond said and moved towards Teresa. Teresa kissed him. Oh my God, this can't be happening. I'm going through a whole lot right now and this is how the world decided to unravel this evil scheme of my best friend to me? I put my hands on my face and started crying.
"Awww, cry baby. Don't cry. I promise you'll thank me sooner. I just made you famous. If I were you I'd grab this opportunity and make a life out of it. It's nothing personal, trust me.", Teresa said and pushed me to the ground.
"I want you to suffer. This was how I felt when Anthony rejected me because of you. Not only Anthony, Richard too. You've been so lucky with boys, you were just so blind, rejecting them and deciding to settle for Raymond. He was way out of your league and of course I couldn't let it happen.", she added.
"Do you need a bucket to cry into?" , Raymond asked. I go furious, stood up and slapped him. Immediately Teresa returned the slap. I was so shocked.
"Get the fuck out of my house you dirty pornographer", she yelled and I left immediately.
I cried and walked down the street searching for a cab to take me back home. I couldn't find any going towards my house. I kept on searching and I just ended up trekking the whole journey. I snuck back into my room and thankfully nobody noticed my absence. They really don't care about me. I was hungry and I could feel my blood sugar dropping. I was dizzy. I needed to eat or I'd starve to death. I went to Jayla's room and begged her to bring something for me to eat. She went downstairs and brought cereals for me. I was so famished . I started eating it very fast. I needed to be quick so I'd leave her room so no one knows she disobeyed dad's order. I didn't want to get her in trouble.
Days passed by and it was all just the same routine for me. Cry, sneak into Jayla's room for food, cry even more and sleep. I was so depressed. My mum and dad didn't even bother to check up on me. It was so difficult to believe. I wasn't surprised. My dad was a strong Muslim and I understood how he felt. He was ridiculed by the people in the mosque so he got angry and stopped going. It was all my fault. I just wanted to make Raymond happy. He didn't force me. It was my decision.
"I'm so stupid", I shouted and hit my head gently on the counter. I wanted to end it all. I stood up and walked to my bathroom. I carried my hair pins and started piercing myself. That's it. I started self-harming.
"I can't go on like this", I said and looked at my bleeding arms. I kept on hurting myself. I did it for weeks . Nothing good was coming my way. I was home cooked up and bored. I couldn't read cause I knew it won't take me anywhere. Mum and dad said if I wanted to go to college I had to work and sponsor myself. I couldn't watch tv. Dad disconnected everything. Yeah, I had no phone. He smashed it and I couldn't use it anymore.
I need a job, I thought to myself. I started thinking of what I could do to make money and distract myself from my terrible life.
I finally decided to work as a waitress at a restaurant. It was a fancy restaurant and I was surprised they actually hire me. The pay wasn't so good for me. I was to earn just $70 dollar for a month and with everything I had going on, I knew I won't be able to survive on that. But like they say;"half bread is better than none".
"I got a job", I said to my parents.
"Good for you", mum replied.
Oh God will they ever forgive me? I walked away and it was so obvious they didn't care. I went to my room and thought of self harming again but I decided not to do it. I was ruining my body. The bruises dad gave me were finally healing and I was adding to it. I decided to face my fate the way it was. I knelt down and started praying to God. I begged him for mercy and a better life, even if not with my parents or Jayla. I told God I didn't mind being alone as long as I was happy and living a good life.
"Amen", I claimed and got up to lay on my bed. I checked the time. It was 6:45pm. I sighed and closed my eyes. I slept off. I'm starting work tomorrow and I have to be there as early as 7am in the morning. It's crazy that I had to work from 7 in the morning to 7 in the evening. All these for $70. It was quite poor prior to the fact that it was a really big and expensive restaurant. I had to accept my fate.
The next day I resumed work. It was quite boring and I kept hearing side talks about myself. They thought I was into prostitution. I chose to ignore all the side talks and rumors. I just wanted money so I could go to college.
"Are you okay", a voice said from afar.
"You look lost. What's wrong?", she asked.
"Nothing", I said.
"I'm Lana, you?", she said and stretched her hand to reach for a handshake. I shook her and told her my name.
"You're pretty. You should smile often", she said and I stared blankly at her.
"I'm sorry if you find that offensive". She said and smiled softly. She was really good looking. She was tall and had a very symmetrical face. She'd make a good model for real. I felt she was cool but I did not want any sort of friendship with anyone. Raymond and Teresa taught me enough lessons already.
"It's ok", I said and smiled. Two men on black walked into the restaurant and I was asked to take their order. I proceeded to take their order. It was a very long day. I was really tired and most times I felt like working all night at the restaurant so that I could escape my hell of a home, I even had to eat leftover food because I was not allowed to eat at home. I kept working for weeks hoping they'd increase my salary as I was the one with the least payment. Which was absurd, because it's a very big restaurant and Lana gets $700 monthly. I tried talking to the manager and she said I was on probation. I knew why but it's fine, I couldn't complain. It was what I deserved for being stupid.
*****
Time flew by and like I said, it was all just the same routine. I got used to mum and dad's tantrums. I realized they were never going to forgive me. I was sad but I started getting myself a little. My wounds had healed completely, except for one scratch on my face. It got that when Teresa slapped me. I sighed as I tucked in my white sleeves into my black skirt. I hated the outfit. I decided to change the skirt. Every unit in the restaurant had a dress code. Ours was white sleeves and black skirt. I really wasn't in the mood to wear skirt so I changed into black pants. I picked up my perfume and something strange happened. I became nauseous. I felt like it was because I've been eating people's left over. My tummy started hurting and then I went to the bathroom and started throwing up. I stained my sleeves. Luckily I had 2 extra pairs. I wore another one and applied my perfume again. I became nauseous again. Then I realized it was my perfume that was irritating me. I was jumbled. It was my favorite perfume and I had never experienced such with it. I didn't want to think too much about it. I left the house and went to work.
"Look Avani. That's Jack Trevor. His dad owns the biggest oil factory in LA". Lana said and she looked excited.
"I've never heard of him.", I replied faintly.
"Don't you have instagram?? I follow him and his sister. She's so beautiful and classy. I wish I was her". Lana said with excitement. Lana and I started getting fond of each other. Although I didn't tell her about my family issues cause I was still scared to trust her.
"What are you girls waiting for? Go and take his order", my boss yelled.
"Lana please". I said and she chuckled
"Fine I'll do it". She responded.
No one else walked into the restaurant after Jack came in. I was happy that I could rest a bit. I started feeling hungry. I decided to go the kitchen where they store dirty plates cause that's where the leftovers were . That place was an eye sore. Flies were everywhere but I had no choice. It was either that or starving. I started eating.
"Why are you eating leftovers?", a strange voice said from behind.