SCP Universe, IKEA Store
"You sure you'll be okay here?" Adrian asked Emma.
Emma nodded, brushing her brown hair behind her ear. "Yeah. The people here are nice, and that doctor keeps us safe from the Staff. Even if he's..." She shuddered. "Really creepy sometimes."
"He's not so bad once you get used to him." Adrian glanced toward the laboratory where Plague Doctor was still examining samples. "Just don't let him try to 'cure' you."
"I won't." Emma smiled weakly. "The medical assistants already warned me about that. They said as long as we don't show signs of severe 'Pestilence' like the Staff, he leaves us alone."
Adrian leaned against the wall, watching the community go about their day. Unlike the other settlements, these people still had hope.
They hadn't been here long enough to break.
"I'll come back," he said quietly. "Once I find somewhere safe, I'll help evacuate as many people as possible."
Emma looked down at her hands. "What if you don't find anywhere better?"
"I will." Adrian straightened up. "There are surely worlds out there that don't have any major supernatural dangers."
"And if there aren't?"
Adrian didn't answer immediately. The dimensional travel node had fully recovered from the emergency jump that brought them here. He could leave whenever he wanted, but...
But he couldn't just abandon these people forever.
"Listen." Adrian put a hand on Emma's shoulder. "The doctor keeps everyone safe here. You've seen how organized they are, how they help new survivors. This place gives people hope."
Emma kicked at the floor. "I just don't want to be trapped here."
"You won't be." Adrian smiled. "Once I find somewhere better, I'll come back for everyone..."
He trailed off as Plague Doctor left his laboratory, carrying a scanning device.
"Ah! There you are!" The masked figure walked toward them. "I must thank you again for those fascinating specimens. The leather samples show good resistance to the Great Dying!"
Adrian stared at the beaked mask, and fell into deep thought regarding everything he'd learned about the SCP Foundation over the past two days. The organization contained things that could kill you just by thinking about them. Information that could rewrite reality. Ideas that could spread like viruses through entire populations.
Cognitohazards, infohazards, antimemes, memetic kill agents…
He needed more time to prepare before daring to go into that world. The Store might be endless and filled with murderous Staff, but at least the threats here were straightforward - they tried to kill you with their hands, not with reality-bending concepts.
"Actually, Doctor." Adrian cleared his throat. "I wanted to discuss something with you. I'm planning to leave this dimension soon."
The plague doctor tilted his head. "Leave? But we've barely begun our research!"
"I know, I know." Adrian raised his hands. "But I was thinking... some of your lab assistants might benefit from a vacation in another dimension once I find a safe world. One completely free of the Pestilence! And while I'm there, I could collect more samples for your studies."
Emma shot him a confused look, but stayed quiet.
"More samples?" Plague Doctor pulled out a notebook. "From different dimensions? Yes... yes! The comparison potential would be invaluable! But how will you ensure they remain uncontaminated during transport?"
"I have special storage methods," Adrian assured him. "The same way I preserved those leather samples."
"Excellent!" Plague Doctor scribbled in his notebook. "And you'll ensure the samples remain untainted by the Pestilence during transit?"
"Of course." Adrian nodded. "My storage system keeps everything in perfect condition."
The doctor pulled more equipment from his endless medical bag. "We must establish proper documentation protocols. Perhaps a classification system based on dimensional origin..."
Emma tugged at Adrian's sleeve. "Can we talk? Privately?"
"Doctor, if you'll excuse us?" Adrian gestured to Emma. "My companion needs to discuss travel arrangements."
"Yes, yes." Plague Doctor waved them away, absorbed in his notes. "Return when you're ready to establish proper sampling procedures."
They walked to a quiet corner near the medical wing. Emma crossed her arms and frowned at Adrian.
"You're really leaving?"
"I have to." Adrian leaned against the wall. "There are a couple of things I need to do in this Store. Alone. Once I'm done with that, I'll be ready."
"And then what? You'll just... go?"
"Not forever." Adrian shook his head. "Look, I meant what I said about finding somewhere safe. But I need to understand what's out there first."
Emma kicked at the floor. "What if something happens while you're gone? What if the Staff break through, or the doctor decides we're all sick?"
"The settlement is growing stronger every day." Adrian pointed toward the walls where new defenses were being built. "More survivors arrive constantly. They have good leadership, proper organization. The doctor might be obsessed with his cure, but he keeps everyone safe. Not even one person has died here in months."
"I guess..." Emma sighed. "Just... promise you'll come back?"
"I promise." Adrian smiled. "Besides, I told the doctor I'd bring him samples. Can't disappoint my biggest fan, right?"
Emma managed a small laugh. "I guess not."
"If it'll make you feel better..." Adrian looked toward the central meeting area where the settlement's council gathered. "I can help make this place even safer before I go."
He walked toward the collection of makeshift offices where Emil and Zachariah coordinated Black Cross' defense. The name had gained traction because of the Plague Doctor..
Emil looked up from a stack of inventory reports as Adrian entered. "Need something?"
"Actually, I wanted to offer something." Adrian gestured to the walls visible through the window. "You know I'm not exactly normal, right? Like the doctor?"
Zachariah set down his coffee. "We figured as much. The way you fight, how you can produce food from nowhere..."
Adrian pulled out a cobblestone block from his storage, setting it on the desk. Emil tried to pick it up but struggled with its weight.
"Stone barriers," Adrian explained. "Much stronger than furniture. I have enough to fortify all your vulnerable sections."
"The northwest corner needs it most." Zachariah ran his hand over the block's smooth surface. "The shelving units there are getting unstable."
"I can start now if you'd like."
Emil nodded and gathered a construction team. Over the next few hours, Adrian worked alongside the builders, teaching them how to place the blocks.
"What kind of stone is this?" Marcus knocked on the wall, producing an odd sound. "It fits together like puzzle pieces."
Adrian placed another block, watching their faces as it clicked into position. The Minecraft physics made construction simple, even if the blocks looked odd next to the Store's furniture walls. By mid-day, they had reinforced three major sections.
"Amazing progress!" Emil walked along the new walls. "The Staff won't break through these!"
Adrian stared at the stone barriers, deep in thought. Then his eyes widened dramatically as he remembered his other materials. Oak blocks. Coal blocks. 28 coal blocks and 82 oak blocks...
"Hey." Adrian turned to Emil and Zachariah. "I might have another way to help."
"Better than these walls?" Emil raised an eyebrow.
"Maybe even more important." Adrian quickly crafted a torch and pulled it out from his storage. "In this other dimension, these prevent monsters from spawning nearby. They never burn out."
Zachariah stepped closer to stare at the odd-looking torch. "And you think they'll work on the Staff?"
"We've all seen how Staff just appear out of nowhere each day, right?" Adrian created another torch. "With my materials, I can make about a thousand of these."
Emil's eyes widened. "A thousand? That could cover the entire settlement, right?!"
"Wait." Zachariah grabbed Adrian's arm. "If the Staff can't spawn, how will the Store restock? We need supplies."
"We'll avoid placing torches near the food sections." Adrian smiled. "But imagine never having to worry about Staff appearing near the settlement."
Emil started pacing, running his hands through his hair. "Do you understand what this means? We could expand! Take over whole sections of the Store! Create safe zones where people can actually sleep without worrying about Staff breaking in!"
"Get the council." Zachariah was already heading toward the offices. "Everyone needs to hear this. Now!"
Within minutes, the settlement's leaders gathered around a table where Adrian demonstrated the torches. People talked over each other, pointing at maps and arguing about placement strategies.
"This changes everything," John, the head of security, slammed his hand on the table. "We've all seen the corpses of new arrivals outside of our walls. If we can prevent that..."
"First, we need to test if they work," Adrian interrupted, placing a stack of torches on the table. "We should verify they affect the Staff before making big plans."
John nodded and selected an area near the northwest corner. "This spot gets at least three to four new Staff every day. We'll know quickly if something changes."
Someone led Adrian to the northwest corner, and he started placing twenty torches in a grid pattern while guards watched from the walls. The council had people take shifts observing the test area while Adrian spent the time chatting with Emma.
Every few hours, someone would update him on the results.
"Six hours - no Staff."
"Twelve hours - still clear."
"Eighteen hours - one Staff walked through from an unlit area, but none appeared inside the torch grid."
By the next morning, the council had reached a decision. The torches worked. Now they just needed to decide where to place them without disrupting the Store's restocking mechanics.
Six hours later, Adrian sat on top of the stone wall watching people celebrate below. They had gathered in the central area, sharing drinks they'd found in one of the café sections.
"To Adrian!" John raised a cup of coffee. "And to never finding hordes of Staff at our walls again!"
People cheered and clapped.
Even Emma smiled genuinely for the first time since Adrian had met her.
"Most impressive." Plague Doctor walked on top of the rampart towards Adrian. "The Staff will simply come from elsewhere, of course. The Pestilence drives them to spread, to infect, to multiply. But your barriers will redirect their flow. Yes... most efficient."
Adrian just had a strained smile on his face as the Plague Doctor kept ranting about the Pestilence.
Okay. It was time.
He'd done what he could to make Black Cross safer. The stone walls would hold, and the torches would prevent Staff from spawning near the settlement in great numbers. There wasn't much more he could do at this point.
He gathered everyone to say goodbye. Emma hugged him tightly, making him promise three more times that he'd return. John and the other council members gave him maps they'd drawn of nearby sections. Even Plague Doctor offered him an empty specimen jar "for collecting samples."
"Remember," Adrian told Emil. "Just keep them protected from damage and they'll serve you well."
"We will do our best." Emil clasped his shoulder. "Good luck out there."
Adrian waved goodbye and started sprinting down the torch-lit path leading away from Black Cross.
"Finally!" Derflinger spoke up once they were far enough away. "I was getting tired of pretending to be a normal sword around that doctor."
"You didn't like him?" Adrian jumped over a fallen shelf.
"Partner, he kills people by touching them. And did you see how many Staff corpses were in that research wing? He creeps me out!"
"At least he keeps the people there safe."
"True." Derflinger sighed. "So where are we heading? These phones could be anywhere in this endless place."
Adrian slowed to check a map. "One of their scouts had seen a phone, so I'll go there first. It shouldn't take too long to find the rest."
The next three days passed quickly as Adrian kept running through the Infinite IKEA. He passed abandoned camps, cut through Staff that attacked from once the lights went out, and chatted with Derflinger. The next two phones he collected had brought him to 90% attunement with this dimension.
But now… he grabbed the final phone from a service desk. Three hundred miles of running through endless aisles had paid off - he now had the last piece needed for full dimensional attunement.
That was when a faint buzzing sound made him freeze in place.
The noise grew louder. Adrian looked up to see a quad copter drone far in the distance flying his way. A camera swiveled on its underside, and the letters 'SCP' were clearly engraved on the metal frame.
Adrian dove under some desks, pressing himself against the floor.
"Partner?" Derflinger whispered. "What's wrong?"
"Quiet!" Adrian watched the drone come closer. "That's Foundation technology."
"The people who contain anomalies?"
"Yes." Adrian remembered what Plague Doctor had told him about the Foundation's capabilities. "We need to stay hidden from them at all costs."
The drone paused near the service desk.
"Can't you just destroy it?" Derflinger said quietly.
"And alert them something unusual is here? No." Adrian stayed completely still. "Better they think this section is empty."
The drone continued its sweep, buzzing growing fainter as it moved away.
Adrian waited five more minutes before crawling out. "We're lucky I have enhanced hearing, because that could've been bad."
He didn't wait a moment longer and quickly pressed the final phone against his head. Ten minutes later, and his blue eyes glowed softly as he fully attunement to this dimension.
"Time to go," Adrian muttered. "I need to restock in Minecraft, maybe find some new things to adapt."
He stored his Netherite armor pieces into the Crystalline Minecraft Pearl one by one, but he paused, looking at Derflinger. "We have a problem."
"What kind of problem?"
"You won't work properly in Minecraft like this." Adrian gestured to the sword's realistic Netherite body. "The physics are different there. Everything follows strict rules."
"So what are you saying?" Derflinger asked suspiciously.
"I need to store you in my Pearl for a bit." Adrian winced. "It'll convert you into Minecraft format temporarily."
"What?!" Derflinger's voice rose. "You want to turn me into one of those blocky things? No way!"
"It's just for a little while." Adrian tried to sound reassuring. "Once we leave Minecraft, I can convert you back."
"And what if something goes wrong? What if I get stuck as a bunch of cubes?"
Adrian shook his head. "The Pearl can convert things both ways, you know that I've done it with other items."
"Items!" Derflinger snapped. "I'm not some random piece of equipment!"
"You're right, I'm sorry." Adrian sat down next to the sword. "But we need to do this. I can't leave you behind, and you can't function properly in Minecraft as you are now."
Derflinger went quiet for a moment. "Will it hurt?"
"I don't think so." Adrian picked up the sword carefully. "Ready?"
"No," Derflinger grumbled. "But do it anyway. Just... be careful with me in there, okay?"
Adrian stored Derflinger in the Pearl and immediately pulled him back out. The sword popped out in his hand, now pixelated like every Minecraft item.
"That was quick!" Derflinger spoke, sounding surprised. "Did it work?"
"Take a look at yourself."
"I... what happened to my beautiful curves? I'm all squares and straight lines!"
Adrian smiled. "Welcome to Minecraft physics. How do you feel?"
"Fine, actually." Derflinger urged him to test the edge against a nearby shelf, but it didn't fully cut through like the realistic version would. "Didn't feel a thing. One moment I was going in, next moment I'm out looking like this."
"The Crystalline Minecraft Pearl seems to preserve everything exactly as it went in." Adrian patted his chest. "Like a perfect storage space where time stands still."
"Handy trick." Derflinger's voice came clearly from the blocky blade. "Just don't leave me in there too long. I'd hate to miss out on any adventures."
"Yes, of course." Adrian checked his surroundings one last time. No drones in sight. "Ready?"
"As ready as I'll ever be looking like this." Derflinger sighed dramatically.
"Let's go find some new things for you to eat."
Adrian's eyes began glowing bright blue. The air twisted and warped around him as reality bent to accommodate the dimensional jump. Five seconds later, he vanished from the endless Store.
He appeared in a forest clearing about one mile from New Haven. The blocky trees and grass felt jarring after weeks in more realistic worlds. Adrian released his suppression of the Minecraft Physics Integration, and his body shifted to match the world's rules. Even in human form, he now looked like a more detailed version of a Minecraft player.
He pulled out his Netherite armor and equipped it piece by piece. The enchanted metal settled perfectly over his now-cubic frame.
"This feels weird," Derflinger commented from the blocky sword in Adrian's hand. "Everything's so... rigid."
"You get used to it." Adrian started walking toward New Haven.
"The physics here are simple, but they work."
When they reached the settlement's gates, the guards raised their weapons.
"Hold!" One shouted. "Identify yourself!"
"I'm a friend of Sarah and Jason," Adrian called back. "Name's Adrian!"
The guards looked skeptical. "Adrian's not human. He's some kind of monster mob."
Adrian sighed and transformed into his Primal Zerg form. The guards jumped back as he shifted back to human.
"Adrian!" Sarah's voice came from inside the walls. "Let him in!"
The gates opened and Sarah rushed out, stopping abruptly when she saw him. Her cubic eyes widened as she took in his appearance - the more detailed but definitely Minecraft-style body.
"What... how did you..." She walked around him in a circle. "You look like us now! Well, sort of. More detailed, but still..."
"Found a weird mob," Adrian shrugged. "Some modded thing that looked like a realistic Steve. When I killed it, the drop item let me transform into this."
"That's so cool!" Sarah poked his arm. "And weird. Really weird. But cool! Jason! Come look at this!"
Jason jogged over from a nearby farm plot. "No way. Is that really you, Adrian?"
"The one and only." Adrian grinned. "Nice wheat field you've got going."
After catching up briefly with Sarah and Jason about New Haven's expansion, Adrian made his excuses. He needed to check on his old den and plan his next moves.
The mountain den looked exactly as he'd left it. Adrian sat down on a crafting table and pulled out his inventory list.
"Okay, partner." Derflinger spoke from the blocky sword. "What's the plan?"
"First, we need an Enderman." Adrian scratched marks in the stone wall with his nails. "Fresh Ender Pearl means fresh Essence. But they teleport away from projectiles, so my spines won't work."
"Close combat then?"
"Yeah. Need to catch one by surprise." Adrian drew another mark. "Also need more resources. Gold for ingots, golden apples and carrots. We'll need lots of coal and various building blocks too..."
"Why not ask those other guys where to find this stuff?"
Adrian shook his head. "Endermen spawn randomly, and gold ore can be found everywhere deep underground. No point asking for help."
He stood up and transformed into his Primal Zerg form, and kept Derflinger magnetically attached to his scales.
"We'll start with mining," Adrian decided. "Stock up on materials first. Then in a couple of Minecraft days... we hunt."