A week passed, and Martin had begun integrating into this modern family. His method was simple: win over the children.
He took Hailey out in his Porsche 911 for driving practice in quiet areas, casually discussing relationships and boyfriends.
He answered genius teen Alex's academic questions and shared stories about living with roommates whose IQs topped 150.
He taught Luke tricks to handle his prankster sisters.
He took Manny downtown, transforming a future Colombian gang leader into a cool street-style teen, earning admiration from girls.
Even Lily Tucker-Pritchett, the non-verbal Asian baby, wasn't overlooked. After Martin danced a waltz with her, she'd reach out and babble excitedly whenever she saw him.
Thus, "Uncle Martin says…" became the most frequent phrase in the Pritchett household. Of course, Martin noticed the complicated looks from the parents—jealousy over Jay and the kids favoring him. Pathetic, really.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Thanksgiving break flew by. After Sunday dinner at Jay's, Martin promised to return next week and drove back to his Queens apartment.
To his surprise, he found the science nerd quartet and Penny inside, celebrating with beer, soda, and snacks.
"Hey, guys… Did I miss something *again*?" Martin asked, habitually wary.
"Martin! How was the family reunion?" Leonard blurted, unusually upbeat.
"Not bad." Martin eyed the messy table. "What's all this?"
Sheldon, perched smugly on his couch cushion, declared: "Remember my hypothesis three months ago? The one about solid matter at absolute zero spinning at high speeds, causing atomic destabilization and non-solid material formation?"
Martin tilted his head. "Uh… sure?"
"Exactly!" Sheldon thrust a journal into his hands. "Our paper was published in *The International Journal of High-Energy Particle Physics*—front cover!"
Martin skimmed the title: *"Hypothesis and Experimental Verification of Chaotic Matter Formation via Absolute Zero High-Speed Atomic Rotation."* Authors: Dr. Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Leonard Hofstadter.
"This is incredible!" Martin said, ignoring Sheldon's side-eye at the co-author credit.
As the group toasted, the science nerds booted up the Xbox. Martin, beer in hand, only watched as his controller privileges were revoked after missing too many "Halo Nights" and paintball Sundays. Sheldon had demoted him to "acquaintance," same as Penny.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Later, Penny plopped beside Martin, wiping pizza grease off her fingers. "So… the big family treated you okay?"
"Mostly. Reconnecting with long-lost relatives takes time," Martin shrugged.
"Lucky you. My Omaha relatives just critique my boyfriends and paycheck," Penny grumbled.
Martin nudged her. "How's it going with Leonard?"
Penny grimaced. "After I mentioned worrying about our education gap, he gave me a *community college application* yesterday."
Martin nearly spat his beer. "He didn't."
"He did."
"Do what you want, Penny. I'm done with you two."
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