Darkness.

I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. Pressure crushed me from all sides, relentless and overwhelming. It was like being forced into a space too small for me to exist. Trapped wasn't even the right word, it was worse than that.

Wha- what's happening?

Muffled sounds surrounded me. Voices. They were distorted, unintelligible, but familiar in their rhythm. A woman's voice, strained and full of effort. Another, deeper voice, calmer, like it was trying to offer reassurance. But the words? Nonsense, I can't understand.

It felt like I was on the verge of something monumental, like my entire being was being squeezed into a new existence. My mind reeled as I tried to understand. This wasn't the void I thought I'd sink into after death. This wasn't nothingness.

The pressure grew worse, more insistent. My body, small and fragile, was being pushed, but I couldn't resist. I wasn't in control, and panic clawed at my mind as the sensation overwhelmed me.

Then came the air.

A stinging cold that rushed into my lungs, forcing them to expand painfully. My chest spasmed, and before I even understood why, my throat erupted with a scream. High-pitched, raw, and desperate.

The sound startled even me. It was completely weird, completely beyond my control. That's supposed to be me?

More sounds, clearer now. The woman's voice returned, softer this time, trembling with emotion. Warm, steady hands cradled me. Someone pressed me close, and I felt the soft beat of a heart beneath my cheek. The warmth of her body seeped into mine, and for a moment, the panic was gone.

My vision was useless. Everything was bathed in blurry light and shadow. But even without seeing her face, I knew, whoever this was, she cared about me.

Her voice was soothing, even though I couldn't understand a word. The language was completely foreign, but the way she spoke reminded me of something I hadn't felt in a long time.

safety

Is this... my mother? The thought was bizarre, but I couldn't shake it.

Another voice spoke, low and steady. A man's this time. His tone was different, measured, calm. There was no hostility, but it carried a weight of authority.

I was passed from the woman's arms into his. His hands were larger, more deliberate. He held me like I was something fragile but important. I couldn't make out his features through the haze, but his voice rumbled above me. Whatever he was saying, it felt like a declaration.

This is my father. Has to be.

Another sound interrupted the moment, lighter, higher-pitched. A boy's voice.

I found myself shifting again into smaller clumsier hands. My body, tiny and new, sagged under the uncertain grip as I squinted upward. Through my blurry vision, I saw him. A child no older than four, his round face leaning close to mine.

The boy's eyes lit up with curiosity. "He's so small!" he exclaimed in a language I didn't understand, looking back at the adults behind him. His hands, though unsteady, were careful as he held me. "Mama can I keep him? Like… like a pet?"

A soft laugh came from my mother. My mother? as she gently intervened. Her voice was playful but firm guiding my brother's hands to hold me better. "Ali is your brother Aron not a pet," she said her tone patient.

Aron's lips curled into a pout his forehead scrunching as if that was the most disappointing thing he'd ever heard. "But he cries like a kitten," he countered poking my cheek lightly with a finger.

Even through my haze I felt the small jolt of his touch. It wasn't malicious just filled with the curiosity of a young child. He tilted his head leaning closer again as though studying some rare creature.

"Hi Ali," he whispered testing my name on his lips. "I'm your big brother. You better not cry all the time okay?"

I would've laughed at the absurdity of his demand if my newborn body had allowed it. Instead all I could do was stare at him my blurred vision barely making sense of his features.

My mother's voice came again soft and reassuring. "Aron let me take him back he's so little, he needs to rest."

Aron hesitated clearly reluctant but eventually handed me back into her waiting arms. "Okay," he said with a dramatic sigh as though he'd been asked to give up something terribly important. He brightened a second later: "Can I play with him when he's bigger?"

"Of course," my mother said laughing lightly as she settled me against her chest again. I felt her cheek brush against my head. The warmth of her breath tickling my skin gently and relaxed further into her embrace as exhaustion took over once more.

So this is my family. A mother who holds me like I'm her entire world, a father who watches over quietly, and an eager brother bursting curiosity and life itself…

It was a lot to process. the unfamiliar language, the blinding light, the overwhelming sensations of this new body… My mind felt like it was running a race I hadn't trained for…

But even through chaos one thought kept grounding.

You're alive! For now, that's enough.