Other heroes of best-selling isekai literature by the third chapter manage to acquire a powerful artifact (the especially quick ones in the first, if they're not too busy with brawling), a harem, and some sexual experience.
The unhurried Yuri didn't manage to acquire a powerful artifact; the only one in his harem was his handsome double, and as for sex, things didn't go well at all.
But these are trifles; the main thing is that on the second day of these rather dubious adventures, Yuri ate a lot and deliciously. And that's important.
And when the most important matter was thoroughly taken care of, the yokai proceeded to study the remaining inventory.
Yuri took his weapon in hand, pondering how to view its characteristics. A magical window helpfully flashed before him, startling him for a second.
Wakizashi
#&## ????
"Very informative," remarked Mr. Gennady. "And where's mine?"
He pointed to the pile of stuff he had dumped out of his bag. Yuri fished out two straps of black leather with silvery spike studs. The bakeneko pulled a doubtful face, taking them in her hands; perhaps they stirred memories of a wild youth.
Bracers of the Martial Arts Master
?? №??###
"Would've been better if they'd given at least the Bolt of the Martial Arts Master. How are you supposed to hit with this? Does it give any bonuses at all?"
"You can see—the description is missing. I'm disappointed myself."
The kitsune shrugged and hung the wakizashi on her belt.
"All of this is strange, of course, but at least we had a very good meal. In the game, it was very good food, restoring a bunch of points for everything. Now there were no messages, but I feel unrealistically full, so that's good."
Next were the potions. The system messages were just as informative, but they managed to determine that these were potions of health, mana, and morale. The last ones especially pleased Mr. Gennady—driven by innate intuition, he uncorked a vial with a urine-colored liquid, took a swig, for some reason sniffed his kimono sleeve, and, grunting contentedly, smiled. He definitely boosted his spirits:
"Not bad."
Yuri didn't open the boxes resembling Christmas presents. He explained that in the game, they yielded random loot, mainly components for alchemical crafting. Perhaps they'd be able to sell or use them, but it was better to carry them as boxes. They stuffed them back into the bags.
In the pouches with the jingling contents, as expected, there were coins. They followed into the bags after the boxes.
Left lying on the moss were amulets. Yuri took one in his hand:
"That's a very interesting item if it works as it should. It should help us a lot!"
"And what is it?"
A magical window opened and displayed:
Novice's Amulet
"Wel#ome to Hell %??##
##$4
"Sometimes, to support newbies in 'Grind Hell,' they give out these things. They triple the experience gained and store it until you level up, which won't happen until you break the amulet. You can't wear it if you're above the first level. They have many restrictions, and they disappear along with all the accumulated experience upon death."
"So!" Mr. Gennady posed a rather unphilosophical question. "What happens if we die?"
Yuri froze. Dying wasn't part of his plans. He hadn't thought about it. The kitsune glanced hopefully at the Tree of Wisdom—it continued to sleep. Obviously, getting an answer to this burning question anytime soon wasn't possible.
Thus, the inspection of the Mary Sue kit was completed. Maybe it was modest and gave dubious bonuses; perhaps it was a Chinese knockoff altogether, but Yuri and Mr. Gennady had nothing else.
"Oh well, it won't get worse," declared Mr. Gennady, waving his hand and putting on the amulet. "You're planning to level up on small fry? Stay at the first level to the max?"
"Yes," Yuri confirmed, overcoming his existential crisis.
"We have to assume that we're mortal. And mortal at any level. For now, there's no reason to raise it, and we'll figure it out later. The main thing is not to stick our necks out."
The bakeneko stood up, estimated the weight of the bag. Satisfied, she put it on her back and began to examine the forest surrounding the clearing:
"And now, Yuri, try to answer one more VERY important question. Can we change gender here?"
Yuri also stood up, adjusting his bag on his back:
"In the game—yes. Here? You understand, Mr. Gennady."
"Just Gena. I don't know what's up with the World's Evil and returning home. But we have to live somehow anyway, and I want to live as a man. I hope we can at least achieve that together. And we'll start with that, if you don't mind. What about you, Yuri, what do you think about it? Or do you prefer having furry boobs?"
"Not at all, Gena. Not at all."
"Then onward, Yuri! To search for our lost manhood!"
***
Despite leaving the clearing of the Tree of Wisdom on a high note, their enthusiasm quickly shattered against harsh reality. First, Gennady Alekseevich had no idea where to go, even though he was the one who dragged Yuri away from the clearing. For a while, the duo wandered aimlessly through the forest, each believing that the other knew the way and was leading. Second, when this absurdity was revealed, it also became clear that they had no plan at all.
A brief discussion of the situation didn't last long—nearby, they heard the sound of many paws, and among the trunks, silhouettes suspiciously resembling wolves flickered. In a second, about a dozen and a half creatures appeared, surrounding the players in a semicircle. Obviously, their first real battle was about to happen! Yuri stroked the hilt of his blade, and Mr. Gennady surveyed the wolves appraisingly.
A moment later, both were scrambling up the nearest tree. Particularly adept was the sensible Mr. Gennady, who, forgetting his problems with climbing, astonishingly quickly found himself at the very top of the tree. From there, he shouted down to the noticeably lagging student:
"Come on, Yuri! Release your 'kraken'!"
"Don't you want to try your skills in action? You won't get any experience."
"The hell with it!"
The kitsune shrugged, muttering, "Well, let's see." Her double materialized beside her and deftly jumped down. Yuri himself was extremely curious to see it in action. The experience showed both the high autonomy of the summon and the possibility of fine control—much better than in the game. Wisely deciding that directly controlling it while trying not to fall from the tree was not the best idea, Yuri simply willed the illusion to kill all the enemies.
And the double began. Unsheathing the blade in mid-air, she landed on the back of an unsuspecting wolf, driving the weapon into its skull. She rose. The pack surrounding the tree instantly switched to the new target, engulfing the spot where the kitsune had just been in a living wave. But she stepped back, cold-bloodedly delivering swift blows with the blade at full arm's length. The sharpness of the blade and her strength did their job; sprays of blood and severed body parts flew in all directions. Losing several more, the pack tried to encircle the double to attack from behind, but it was clear that their appetite had diminished. The illusion didn't wait to be surrounded and finished the fight by swiftly attacking the largest beast, obviously the leader. And when he turned into mince in a couple of seconds, the remaining wolves, snarling and growling, scattered, showing an ingenuity unavailable to game mobs.
The double stood for a while, glancing around bloodthirstily, but there were no new targets, and Yuri dismissed her. Then he climbed down from the tree and, bending over the nearest corpse, began making some gestures.
"What's that, voodoo magic?" came from above.
"No," snapped the student, who had to fight alone—even if "fight" in this case meant dropping a furry terminator on the enemy.
"I opened the status window by repeating the character's animation from the game; maybe it will work with looting too... I already mentioned the quest for 500 gonads; if we have to do something similar, I'll go crazy skinning corpses."
At first, it didn't work. But then the kitsune felt the same sensation as when using skills—it seemed she had spent mana, and the corpse suddenly stirred. The wolf's body split at the seams and unfolded like a meaty flower or an alien egg. The kitsune immediately looked inside.
"That's disgusting!" commented the voice from above. "You can dig in that yourself."
Yuri didn't dig into "that"; the result of the inspection satisfied him, albeit slightly frightened him. Although if he were faced with the real necessity of collecting a grocery list for a quest, he'd rather be given a big black bag and a scoop along with it.
After that, Yuri checked his novice amulet. Under the item's name, in the jumble of symbols, there were indeed some changes—after killing the wolves, the amulet seemed to have counted something. But what exactly and how much was impossible to understand.
All of this was starting to annoy Yuri considerably. The mysterious absence of damage messages, health points, loot acquisition that resembled a scene from "Saw"—anime hadn't prepared him for this. He had watched a lot of anime about people trapped in computer games, more than hentai, by the way! But all of it shattered against harsh reality and could help him no more than the advice of a mother's friend's son on successfully communicating with girls. And although his guesses, voiced to Mr. Gennady at the Tree of Wisdom, had a grain of truth, Yuri had forgotten about it. Returning the dubious amulet under his dress, he simply sighed wearily.
Evening was approaching; they decided to spend the night and, after developing a plan of action, set out in the morning. The kitsune returned to the tree. The yokai held a council:
"So, where should we head, Yuri?"
"Good question. If the geography matches the game's, we're now in the Everlasting Forest. To the south is the sea. To the west is the country of Sabaton—it's like an abstract Europe. To the east is the Great Empire of Jin—an abstract Asia. The difficulty of locations increases from south to north, where the Twilight Lands are. We definitely don't need to go there."
"Let's go west."
"Why there specifically?"
"Yuri, I personally don't want to go to those Chinese without any knowledge; they might accidentally eat us. I'd prefer something more familiar."
"Makes sense. But you look like an Asian. Do you think there won't be problems?"
"And you look like Brother Fox."
"Uh-huh. Well, to the north are enclaves of beast-headed ones..."
"You said the difficulty is higher there. Besides, you mentioned that we're demons. How will they treat us, considering that?"
"Oh! Stupid game lore. I didn't think about that."
"And by the way, you're a shapeshifter and can supposedly turn into a human."
"Exactly! I forgot," Yuri almost fell from the tree, remembering this.
There was nothing surprising about that. In "Grind Hell," the human form that the kitsune could take had no function other than aesthetic. Moreover, maintaining the form consumed mana. No wonder Yuri hadn't thought about transforming into a human until now. On his character in human guise, he mostly tried on different outfits and underwear, took screenshots, and posted them on various social networks to troll a crowd of jealous followers.
"Tomorrow I'll test the human form. We don't know what's waiting for us there; it's better to play it safe. Yokai—yes, that could be a problem. And they might expose us, that's a fact."
"Exactly! I forgot," Yuri almost fell from the tree, remembering this.
There was nothing surprising about that. In "Grind Hell," the human form that a kitsune could take had no function other than aesthetic. Moreover, maintaining the form consumed mana. It's not surprising that Yuri hadn't thought about transforming into a human until now. In his character's human guise, he mostly tried on different outfits and underwear, took screenshots, and posted them on various social networks to troll a crowd of jealous followers.
"Tomorrow I'll test the human form. We don't know what's waiting for us there; it's better to play it safe. Yokai—yes, that could be a problem. And they might expose us, that's a fact."
The kitsune's face darkened:
"There's a class called Demonologist. In the game, they're our antagonist. Very unpleasant in PvP. And the main thing—one of their basic skills can reveal our true nature. And even my 'Distraction' won't help. Let's hope we don't meet one. And darn, there were even NPC demonologists in the game, which means..."
"We'll see. The Tree invited us; maybe we'll get lucky."
"And how will we prove it? The Tree isn't customs; it doesn't issue visas."
"That's true..."
In the end, they decided to head west. And not to rush into a big city with guards right away, but to test the waters in some village. Try to find party members, maybe take them to the Tree of Wisdom for starter kits. Find out about the Universal Evil and gender change potions. And act as circumstances allow.
The bakeneko had already settled more comfortably on the branch and, as she was falling asleep, summed up:
"What a truly stupid decision—to summon die-hard MMO grinders to help fight Evil."
'Indeed,' the kitsune agreed. 'I've seen some of those players—they co… could out-evil Evil itself…'
Yuri paused for a second. After all, nature and fresh air had a positive effect on mental activity.
"What's up, Yuri?"
"Oh, just a silly thought crossed my mind. It can't be. Forget it. Good night, Gena."
"Good night, Yuri."
The friends fell asleep. The sounds of the forest quieted down. The gigantic moon rose into the sky…
..And somewhere, who knows where, Anton Pavlovich Chekhov loaded a wad into the barrel of his faithful gun. And smiled…
***
"— So, how is it?" the kitsune asked.
"— A bit too skinny, I'd say. No curves," Gennady Anatolyevich critically examined the transformed student. "And you've still got a tail. And ears."
"— What?!" Yuri jumped up.
He looked behind him—the back of his dress was indeed bulging, unmistakably hinting at a tail.
On the morning of the third day, once again on an empty stomach, Yuri was experimenting with transforming into a human girl. In human form, Yuri looked like a young red-haired girl in a maid outfit. And everything would have been fine, but the disguise of the fox shapeshifter was hopelessly betrayed by the treacherous ears and tail.
"— Okay!" Yuri concentrated, smoothing his head with both hands as if trying to flatten his fox ears. The ears seemed to flatten but treacherously popped back up each time. "— Right. There's an explanation for this."
"— In the game, I had a button! A 'Hide something' button..."
Yuri's body shuddered and rippled as he decided to transform into a regular fox. The cute animal yipped, "Button," and transformed back into a fox-human. "There definitely was one!" she growled, grabbing her ears. She shuddered again, transforming back into the maid.
Yuri showed admirable persistence in trying to press the now non-existent 'Hide something...' button. After countless transformations, he managed to gain control over his ears and make them disappear. But the treacherous tail, despite all efforts, remained an unchanging attribute of his human form.
A simple and elegant solution to his appearance problem eluded the student as easily and inevitably as his girlfriend being led away by the mother's friend's son. He had to think again.
"— Soooo." Leaning his back against a tree, Yuri thought aloud, "— What do we know about kitsune?"
"— That she costs as much as my monthly salary?" Gennady Anatolyevich tried to help.
"— No!" Yuri pushed off from the tree and stood up straight, deftly hiding the tail under his skirt. Apparently, he pressed it against his leg.
"— According to Eastern folklore, an inexperienced kitsune can be revealed in human form because of the tail. Which she hides! And I'm an inexperienced level-one kitsune. Makes sense? Makes sense! That's it. The main thing is that the ears are gone."
The numerous transformations had drained Yuri's mana; he was exhausted and nervous. Besides, he wasn't used to thinking so much and so intensely. That's not why he enrolled in the music faculty of the pedagogical institute. He reached into his bag for a mana potion, took a sip from the vial, and perked up:
"— Well, Gennady Anatolyevich. I think we're now as ready as ever. I'll manage the tail somehow; all that's left is to make contact with the locals."
"— Excellent, Yuri, now we just have to reach them."
The bakeneko adjusted the straps of the bag on her shoulders:
"— It's a pity we don't have horses. You know, it seems to me that distances in the real world..."
The kitsune interrupted him. Yuri was very tired but VERY determined. The journey ahead was indeed not short, and the student already had an idea. He knew that Gennady Anatolyevich wouldn't like the idea, but he also really wanted to be at least somewhat like successful isekai heroes. The kitsune turned to the bakeneko, and for a moment, a demonic fire flickered in the fox's slyly narrowed eyes:
"— Gennady Anatolyevich, the distance may indeed be considerable, and we should have thought about this earlier, but I have a plan. A good plan."
The kitsune loomed over the bakeneko.