1.
In the morning to go to school, just wear a long-sleeved, mom took a jacket, handed me said: quickly put on, otherwise the class will be frozen awake. Crap, this absolute pro-mom ah...
2.
Wife especially two, yesterday by the family dog to bite, the goods actually not angry. Also helped the dog a good bath, with a hairdryer dry, I was wondering, is she going to return the favor. But but but, the climax came, she magnificently bit the dog, the dog accompanied by a miserable sound escaped...
3.
When I was a kid, I did something wrong and my mom beat me, so I always imagined that my mom went to work to make money and my dad was at home; until I went to junior high school and puberty came, I grew up and resisted the beatings, and then I realized that my dad didn't beat us up when I was a kid for fear that he would beat me to death.
4.
I've liked a goddess for a long time, and in the past, when I gave her gifts, she would accept them. Recently, when I give her gifts, she always says to me, "Save your money. The goddess is so nice, she even thinks of helping me save money! I think there is still hope for me.
5.
My mom came to the Internet cafe to catch me, I hurriedly stared at the screen seriously playing the game, because the serious man is the most handsome. I must be so handsome that my mom doesn't even recognize me.
6.
On the road, the old man's bicycle accidentally bumped into a young man's car, and the car was slightly scratched. The young man yelled at the old man and asked him to pay for the damage, and he cried. At that moment, a kindly old lady in the crowd whispered to the old man, "You lie down, you know ...". The man was in a state of shock, and the man was in a state of anger. The old man's face turned red and he angrily replied: "You know your sister ah, what time is it you still want to that ...
7.
One day on the road met a bumper old lady, how to say are not going to have to ask for money, I was anxious, back to think of the paragraph on a very awesome skills, so I picked up the phone to pretend to call. Dad, give me a card to play five hundred thousand, I want to run over someone. At this time, the old lady a big slap to me on the ground, open a motorized car pretend what high-flying handsome ah. Then ... I lay down on the ground with ease!
8.
A buddy's daughter-in-law gave birth in the hospital, he waited anxiously outside the door. Half an hour later, the nurse came out and said excitedly to him: "XX, congratulations, the birth is a father, you're going to be a son". Do you think this is an orgasm? Then you're wrong, the climax is my buddy came to a more thunderous: "haha, I finally become a son". The hospital was petrified on the spot!
9.
One day I was watching TV with my mom, and on the spur of the moment I asked: Mom, do you think I'm handsome? The old man removed his eyes from the TV, looked at me with a serious face, sighed and said: I feel most sorry for you in this life on this!
10.
This winter, I super want to fall in love, I hope you can every day sweet words, coaxed me ghost, and then you cheated, I was heartbroken resulting in a sharp loss of 30 pounds.
11.
Men are often conflicted; the brain loves a woman inside, but the eyes love her outside.
12.
Losing weight is not that easy, every piece of meat has his temperament.