"Thank you for agreeing to watch him,"
The cold night wind is sipping into my bones even though I have a coat on, or is it my anxiety? I don't really know.
I don't know a lot of things lately it seems.
"That's okay," Adelaide is as bright as always even though it's nine pm.
She has her hands gripping Lucas's shoulders tightly as the male stares at me. He has one of his books in his hands and since it's a sleepover, he's in his pajamas.
I'd already told him about the fact that I had a new job interview I was going for tonight. I knew he was happy for me, he was still a bit sad that I'd be busy. I'd wanted to tell him that we could still have our movie nights but I didn't want to lie.
I lean down to kiss his forehead. "I love you,"
He mumbles a response and the amount of love he sends through our bond fills me with warmth. It feels good instantly and the urge to pack up in my arms and inhale his scent rushes through my thoughts but I ignore it.
There's already a car parked from Solis in front of our house so I walk back to it and get in the passenger seat. The driver is silent and so am I even though I have questions and I am nervous.
Last night I reached out to them. The person who had responded had been extremely friendly, especially when I stated the fact that I was an Omega. He tried to mention all the benefits and negatives of the entire thing but I already had an idea of it. Especially from Damien.
After the stunt he'd pulled last night, I realized he was right. The number of people who would pull back from taking advantage of an omega, especially now was lower than it should be but he did. I don't know why he did but I was… Grateful for it.
I needed money as soon as possible and if… If there was a legal way to make it while I still had some… Autonomy over my body then I would gladly take it. I had a son, a good boy who deserved everything the world had to offer and that was what I would do for him.
My mind flashes back to yesterday and I feel myself want to sink into the ground. I was good at playing innocent sometimes but with Damien, it was nearly impossible.
No one had ever called me out like that in years, no one. It was as if even though he couldn't remember who I was, we still had a bond that made me an open book.
But that couldn't be possible. He severed me personally years ago when he rejected me and I'd been kicked out of my pack because of it.
Because of him.
When the car comes to a stop, I feel my anxiety spike but when the driver opens the door, I feel Maia there. She's not comfortable about any of this but she loves Lucas just like I do. He was our son and we couldn't afford to be without him. He was all we lived for.
I hold my purse tighter and walk out of the car before entering the building again. Not surprisingly, the receptionist is still the same woman as before. This time, I notice her tag— Delia and smile at her the second I'm close. "H-Hi,"
Her smile is contagious this time. "Hello, Miss Finch. Welcome. We've been expecting you," She looks like a teacher trying to reassure a new student as she says, "I understand that you might feel a little uneasy but because this is your first time, we've decided to make this new transition easy for you."
She places different files on the desk now. There are pictures of men on each one as she says, "These are their files with their likes and whatnots. Be rest assured, we've done a background check on them so nothing will go awry. If it does, we've been given permission to sue and we would do so extensively—"
"I want Damien," I blurt the words out now. My body's jittering as I feel my body shaking slightly. "Damien Bloodhound, please."
The smile on her face dwindles slightly and I fear that I've said something wrong as I hear her mutter, "He said you'd say that," She leans forward now and that's when I see her face. It's worry. "Are you alright? Did he do something to you after the last time you were here?"
I'm surprised that she remembers who I am but more surprised that she thinks that he did something. "Has he… has he done something like this before?"
"No," She shakes her head kindly. "This is the first time we're having him here. It is why I ask if you're sure he is who you want. His tastes are… We'd usually keep him for someone more experienced and from what you filled on our form yesterday, I am not sure—"
"I'm fine," I feel Maia's curiosity now on what was on his file and why Delia looked so worried but I don't want to think about it too much. I know that Damien scares me but he's never… He's never truly hurt me before, except that one time. And he's familiar.
I would like to feel safe.
Liar. You want him to fuck you.
Maia isn't the one that says it, my brain does but she hears this and I can feel her silent agreement with my thoughts. Delia looks unsure but like clockwork, her smile's back now as she hands me a key, "As per the rules here, your first night must be spent on the premises for us to keep records on your compatibility and your experience. I hope you have a lovely night."
I nod, saying a quick thank you as I head to the elevator now. My body's temperature drops even lower and I can feel myself begin to tremble slightly. I haven't even met him yet and here I am, shaking like a leaf.
When I reach the floor with our designated room, I tell myself that I have to do this. My brain's panicking again, my anxiety worsening as I realize that there is the possibility I'll never be able to escape this if I start now but I push down the feelings away as I enter the room.
His pheromones are the first thing to hit me, a short gasp leaving my lips as I hold unto the door for support. It's choking,overwhelming and all I want to do is let him do what he wants with me but I fight it as hard as I can.
I shut the door and turn to look at him, grasping my purse even tighter as I take him in. He's seated on an armchair directly in front of me shirtless, his body glistening under the barely lit room with different scars scattered all over his body.
His eyes are back to the penetrating gaze they're always in me, like he's trying to see into my soul and it makes me more self-conscious than I already am.
For minutes I stand there, feeling like a prey about to be chased down by a predator as I hear him say under his breath, "Kneel."