"I'm sorry if it seemed like I was avoiding you." Teiko spoke, her tone sincere. The sun was setting in the horizon- its rays bled through the window, casting a warm glow to the room. "Y-yeah, it's fine. I don't mind." I lied, because what idiot would tell a girl that he thought of her as a bitch? "What is it that you wanted to talk to me about?" I continued. "I... I've been meaning to tell you," she spoke with a heavy heart. "about my dad's health."
"What... what about it?" I asked, seemingly worried. "He's been in... serious condition ever since we came to Toku. I wanted to tell you about it, but I couldn't muster up the confidence to confront you during school hours, not in front of everyone." The comforting orange tint contrasted the nature of our conversation, seemingly mocking Teiko's sad situation. Words were held in my throat, stuck as I tried to formulate something- maybe comfort, to Teiko.
But nothing ever came out.
Silence filled the room, and the sun mocked us even more. We were so close, yet so far. But the lighting, it casted a façade of some romcom scenery from some cheesy romance anime. But this scene was far from that. "Its okay, Kaz. You don't have to say anything," she assured, taking the role of the comforter when it should be I, whispering sweet into her ears. "you being here alone helps a lot." she continued, a sad tone in her words of assurance, possibly dissapointed by my lack of response.
But her face, it painted a different picture of content. One that showed bravado and confidence. But I know she's still that sad little girl who'd cry over spilled ice cream. Who mourned the death of an ant she accidentally crushed. Who would try to save a butterfly stuck in a spider's net. One who would give all but ask nothing back. She doesn't have to hide anymore. Not in front of me.
So I hugged her. Seemingly the right thing to do.
And the mask cracked. Like as if I'd broken glass that was hastily put together, water poured from her eyes.
She was warm but cold.
And I knew she was tired. Tired of something. And even though I may not be able to take away that tiredness, I want to give her a momentary comfort. Though, I wanted it to last forever. Though, I wanted it to take away all the pain she had.
And just as the moment began, it passed. My arms were apart from her, aching to be put back around her shoulders. But I could only look at her contours longingly. Her face was puffy from all that crying, but she seemed satisfied to have let out all the sad.
So I held her hands. I took her out of the hellish confinements of the school, where rules dictate what we do, and took her out into the streets. I knew where her house were, so no words were spoken along the way. I kept belittling myself, for ever cursing at her. How could I? She was the only good thing, and held the only thing that was precious to me. No. To us. Even now I'm being selfish.
Along the way, a few faces looked at us with concern. Many might have assumed us to be some sort of runaways. Many with poisoned minds might have thought of me as an abusive boyfriend who has just made his girlfriend cry. Whatever they thought, I don't think it was ever "a boy comforting his girl best friend by holding her hands and walking her home".
Because that's how we humans are. We always assume the worst. And it works out for us. That's how we survive. But none of that mattered. Not now. Not when Teiko is in distress.
We eventually reached her home, and I turned to face her. She gazed downwards, ashamed of her vulnerable state. "Are you okay now, Teiko?" I asked, in as kindly of a voice as I could make. "K-Kinda. Thanks, Kaz... for that hug. I really needed it." She replied in a broken voice, tired from all the crying. "If you ever feel overwhelmed about anything, I'm here, okay?" I tried my best to reassure her. "Okay." she replied, wiping away the last tear remaining in her eyes.
I released my grip on her hand, the warmth fading away from my palm, cold replacing the comforting sensation in my hands. She reached the door, opening it with her keys she had kept in her skirt's pocket, entering into the inky threshold of her house. With one last glance, her eyes glistening from her tears, she hastily waved goodbye. With the palm I held her hands with, I too waved back.
And she dissapeared into the dark.
I went down the path that led to my home, events of today lingering in my mind.
Tomorrow will be another day.