I wonder what it feels like... Flying so high up in the sky like that. I wonder where those birds are going? I guess it doesn't really matter though, you could just fly anywhere you want, not being tied down like this... At best, the most I can see now is down the street. That's when I catch a glimpse of what looks to be a married couple with a kid between them holding both their parent's hands. I feel my skin grow cold as I try to warm my arms up with my hands. I want to look away from them, but my eyes are locked onto that family whether I like it or not as I try my best to suppress this stinging sensation in my heart.
"Luna-"
Once they pass out of my vision, the chilling sensation fades as I look back up to the sky to distract myself, to the flock of birds spreading their wings, flying off wherever they like. Ah... how I envy them.
"-Could you give us the answer to this question here?"
"X=4"
"...Correct."
The teacher probably thought I wasn't paying attention, but even as I answer, I don't look away from those birds out the window as I remain seated in class at the back corner of the room. Once the birds were far enough away, breaking away from my sight, I finally look back into class as I swiftly write down some notes that the teacher wrote up on the blackboard.
With the sound of the school bell, I wait patiently for the next teacher to come in the classroom.
"Cool as always, haha."
Unfortunately, with times like these, I can't have time to myself as a guy I've been sitting next to all year calls out to me. I really can't be bothered, but if I don't entertain him then he'll just continue on and on, just like he's been doing all year...
"It's not that hard of a question. The teacher should be singling someone 'else' out instead of wasting time with me."
That someone of course being the guy next to me.
"Ouch. And cold as ever, huh."
"I've said this many times, but you shouldn't get involved with me."
"You know, when someone says something like that, it only gets them more interested."
How annoying...
"Suit yourself."
"Hehe."
I honestly forgot his name, mostly because I don't care about anyone in my class, or the entire school for that matter, but I do believe that he's the only one that wears that soft expression when talking to me, everyone else just tries to avoid me; just the way I like it. Which only makes his existence all the more annoying.
But what's more annoying is this...
Right when school finished, as I go to open my locker to change shoes, I spot another letter.
"...Hahhh."
I sigh, knowing that this will only waste more of my time. I swiftly change shoes before opening the letter, and just as I expected, it's another love letter. Honestly... How can people even see me in that way? I know full well that I probably have never even talked to this person, yet they want to confess their love to me? How stupid can they be? Thinking that, I absentmindedly scrunch up the letter before throwing it into the trash after reading where the person wants to meet. Let's make this quick...
"U-uhm!"
Here I am, standing in front of the person who put that letter in my locker outside the side of the school building. Words can't describe how much I hate this. Just like I imagined, I have no recollection of meeting this person. How does he even think that this will go well? He must know that I'm going to decline, why would I accept it? I've tried my best to not get involved with people ever since...
Ever since...
("Mmwah!~ Happy birthday sis!~)
("Hehe, you too Reina!~)
I think back on the times, back when I was little, before all of this started...
("Hey hey, let's hop in the bath together!")
("Nn!")
I wasn't always like how I am now, I used to smile, looking forward to the next day that I could spend with my family; my sister... But I can't do that anymore.
"-S-so... Could you p-please be my-!"
"Sorry, I'm not interested."
I decline before he could finish his sentence. His face scrunched up, much like the letter I threw in the trash earlier. A part of me hates being this way, but I refuse to hold anyone dear to my heart again. So, I walk past him, leaving him in his silence as I walk out the school gate. How many times do I have to do this? Just when will the guys here just drop this confessing thing and move on with their lives... But thinking about it like that, I guess that's a bit hypocritical of me...
Just like usual, I walk back home alone, not that it bothers me in the slightest. But right as I cross the road, I catch sight of two white birds this time, unlike the flock I saw earlier this morning. I feel the same stinging pain in my heart as my feet remain glued to the sidewalk, as if the birds themselves petrified me, much like what you read in those Greek mythology books.
"...Sister."
Seeing the two birds together like that, flying side by side, made me think back on the memory I had earlier, and in the next moment, I feel my vision growing more and more blurred. Before a tear could spill from my eyes, I wipe my eyes clean with the back of my hand before finally starting to walk once more. Those two birds are probably mates, not sisters, yet... It still hurts to see them close like that.
It doesn't take long for me to make my way to my apartment as I quickly make my way inside, not wanting to look up in the sky any longer. I don't say anything however, as there's no one here to welcome me; just like I wanted.
Not too long after everything happened, a family friend took me in. He was caring and wanted what's best for me, but I never let him get too close to me... I couldn't. So the moment I turned 16, I asked to live alone. We then made an agreement that he'd pay for my rent until I was 18. By then, I'd have to support myself. Which leads me to going inside the bathroom to get ready.
Looking at myself in the mirror, I pull out the drawer with my makeup as I carefully color over my white eyebrows, dying them into a dark, black color. I do the same with the mascara, turning my white eyelashes into longer, thicker, darker strands. Why am I doing this? It's for my part-time job.
I'm not about to have to deal with customers looking at me weirdly. It's bad enough having to deal with that in public and at school. Of course, makeup isn't allowed at school so I have to bear with it, but at least with work, I can disguise myself to appear more "normal" like everyone else.
Lastly, after making sure I look alright, I put on a long, black-haired wig to hide my silvery-white hair. I did think about maybe wearing colored contacts for my silver eyes as well, but after seeing other people in public having silver eyes a few times, I dismissed that idea. With this, I should be okay, yet as I look at myself in the mirror now, looking at what I've become, I can't help but feel disgusted at myself. Thankfully this is only a part-time job for four hours, but I wonder what I'd feel like having to put up with this in the future, having to put up with this everyday for twice the amount of time... But I have to- no... I need to.
"Have a good day~ Thank you for shopping with us~"
I say to the last customer inside, putting on the bright smile that I need to in order to please everyone. It might be fake, but this is the only time where I do actually need to smile.
The job I do is helping out at the local library. Most of my job consists of restocking shelves with the latest novels or manga, but more often than not, I also have to handle the customers, which leads me to having this disguise. I chose this job for multiple reasons, mostly to earn money for when I inevitably graduate from high school, but also to learn. There's many books here, so when there's downtime, I often read here, further using it to study in order to help me in the future.
"Good work today. You should hurry home before it gets too dark."
My manager walks up to me, dismissing me for the night with a soft smile.
"Nn. See you tomorrow."
Walking out of the library, I immediately notice how dark it has gotten. There's still some lingering sunlight left, but in the next ten or so minutes, the whole place will be caked in darkness. I guess I should hurry back home and get this makeup off my face. I really can't stand having it on me any longer than I need to.
Just as I thought, in just a few minutes of walking, it had already gotten dark enough for the street lights to turn on. The manager cares for me, but he really shouldn't worry so much, this place is quite-
"G-Get away from me! I said I'm not interested!"
Peaceful... Is what I would've thought, but as I was approaching a corner, a scream coming from a girl enters my ears as I slowly peer my face around the corner.
"Aw, come on~ It's dangerous to be outside at this time. Why don't you come with us?"
It's there that I see what looks to be two guys, clearly adults trying to pick up a girl, but I immediately recognize her as someone in my class. I can understand why these guys might think she's an adult, especially with her proportions, but she's clearly trying to get away from them.
"I'm leaving! Like I said I'm-!"
"Hey! Where are you going?"
"Hnng!"
Just as I was about to dismiss it and carry on, one of the men stops the girl from leaving, grabbing her by the wrist, causing her to flinch in pain. Do I really have to step in? I really don't want to- wait... I'm wearing a disguise though... Maybe it's fine.
Thinking that, I step out from the corner and walk up to the three of them.
"Hey. She clearly said no, so why don't you two just drop it and leave."
"Hah?! Oh~? Another one?"
They probably thought I was a dude or something due to my heavier tone, but the moment the two guys looked my way, they quickly changed their tone as their eyes softened. The girl looked towards me, her eyes filled with tears, like a dam ready to burst open.
"Why don't you also come with us? We can all have fun together?"
"Yeah! It's dangerous outside, so-"
The moment one of the men stepped closer to me placing their hand on my shoulder, I immediately twisted it off of me before flinging him around, putting his now outstretched arm behind his back as I apply force onto his shoulder, ready to dislocate it at a moment's notice.
"A-a-ahh!"
"Like I said, we said no, so back off before the cops show up."
I noticed it as I held this man's arm, the girl now has her phone in her hands, seeming to be dialing a number. It's not really needed though.
"Khh! Get off of him!"
The other man rushes me, but I simply use the leverage I have with the man in my grasp to cast him to the side, colliding him with the other man as his body crashes to the ground, his face sliding along the pavement. I use this moment to quickly close the distance to the last man during his confusion to make a quick jab at his throat before sweeping his legs up from under him, his chin smashing onto the pavement, knocking him unconscious.
"W-w-what?!"
The girl looks at me in bewilderment, but I waste no time in taking her hand. Who knows how much time that had bought us.
"Run!"
"Y-yes!"
We end up arriving at a more populated area not too far away from my apartment. She should be fine from here, but I need to make sure.
"Why are you out at this time?"
I ask that question, wanting to get straight to the bottom of this. She's my classmate, so she should be at home having dinner at this time.
"I uhm... I ran away from home."
"...What?"
But the sudden explanation leaves me in shock. She, ran away from home? What kind of idiot does that? Who would run away from family like that?
"I had a fight with my mom, so I left for a friends place."
This girl is incredibly stupid. I don't even need to hear the reason, she shouldn't be running away from something so... precious. Thinking that, I can't help but ball up my fists.
"Go home."
"I can't! That's like admitting defeat!"
She's stubborn... Fine, I don't care anymore.
"Alright, then suit yourself. I'm leaving."
I get up from the bench before walking out from the small shelter, but the moment I do, I feel something splash onto my hand. Huh? Is it... Looking up, I felt another slash hit the side of my cheek, followed by another, and then another until all of a sudden, rain poured down on top of us. I need to hurry-
"W-wait!"
In that moment, I felt my other hand get grabbed by the girl behind me as she pulls me back into the small shelter before I could make a dash for it.
"Do you live close by?"
"Yeah? So what?"
"Could I, maybe stay at your place?"
"..."
Hah~ I really don't want to, but with the sudden downpour of the rain, it'd make me feel too guilty to just leave her out here. If I knew how far her parents live and had an umbrella, I'd just take her there, but now with this...
"Please?"
"...Fine."
At least until the rain subsides...
"Haa! We made it!"
Making our way inside my apartment with a bit of running, she takes off her shoes as I quickly grab a couple towels from the bathroom before throwing one her way. The forecast said that there wouldn't be any rain, but here we are...
"Th-thank you, Luna.
"Don't mention it... wait. Huh?"
Did she... Call me by my name just now? Don't tell me-!
"Hehe. You look really different than in class, but you are Luna, right?"
She saw through my disguise?!
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. Especially after you saved me earlier..."
"...It's not like it's a secret."
I say as I take off the wig that has only been getting more and more itchy from the rain seeping in, revealing my white, silvery hair to her.
"I wear this when going out."
"You mean like a disguise?"
"Yeah."
I'm not about to say where I work to her...
"Hehe, well thank you for letting me stay here, Luna. And uhm... Sorry about earlier. You're not hurt, right?"
"You mean those guys who were hitting on you? Yeah, I'm fine."
"Mmmm! You were so cool though! You took them down like- BAHM! And WHOOSH!"
She's a lively one for someone who was just in a dangerous situation, huh.
"Where did you learn all that?"
"...From my guardian, I guess."
Growing up, ever since I told my parents' friend; my guardian that I wanted to live alone, he drilled self defense into me until he was happy, making sure that I can defend myself if something were to happen. I haven't really had much chances to use what I learnt, but I'm glad I still have the muscle memory.
"So cool~ Oh! Wait, where's your guardian then?"
"No, they don't live here."
"Eh? Then who lives here with you? Where are your-"
"I live alone."
I cut her off before she could bring up my parents as I try to steady my now beating heart. Why have I been thinking this much about it today? Even now, I hold my chest with my hand, trying to calm my heart down to a more steady pace.
"I-I see... I'm sorry."
"It's fine. Just dry yourself off. You can use the shower if you need."
"Th-thank you."
While she's in the shower, I use this time to take a seat on my bed as I look over at the bedside table where a picture frame was standing. I gently reach out, careful not to scratch or damage it as I look at the picture inside it. The only sounds that could be heard are the sounds of the shower running, followed with the girl's humming, however I'm entirely focused on the picture before me.
It's a picture of my family. My mom, dad, big brother, and also my twin sister; Reina. It was taken on one of the most memorable days we had. My brother had recently turned 10 years old, which was a big milestone for our family, but the image was taken on mine and my sister's 5th birthday on the day just after Christmas.
My sister and I are together, our arms wrapped around each other with our mom and dad on either side of us. Our brother's behind us, making bunny ears with his fingers over both mine and my sister's heads. Unlike my twin sister and I, having both white hair, our brother and parents have black hair, but despite that we're all smiling in the picture, with not an ounce of sadness to be seen, yet the me right now can only smile at it bitterly as I once again feel my vision getting cloudy as I accidentally let a tear drip down onto the glass frame. I quickly wipe my eyes before cleaning the picture before putting it back on the bedside table.
I want to go back... I want to see them again... But it's no use...