**ASHLEIGH.**
I called Atelier and asked her to send a carriage for me. Right after I felt so indebted with what my mother--the Goddess of Order, specifically--has stated and carried out to me, I became guilty. I stood there at the library, emptiness has succumbed to me. For a while, I thought I was freeing myself, but I might have endangered innocent lives with my decision.
Atelier readied my long cape and the covers in my head before I rode in the carriage. She had one swift wave of her hand before the carriage lifted itself from the ground and onto the air. I'm getting used with the clouds as my land, and the air touching my skin as the haze of the oxygen near the galaxy beyond. I looked out the window and rethink my thoughts.
"You are deep in thought."
I was watching the clouds past by as we are close to arriving to town. The village that I was handling, or should I say... mine and the Goddess of Order, has been suffering the consequences. I stared at her, and Atelier immediately caught it. She touched my hand, and tapped it.
"I heard the news. That's why I rushed here to call the carriage and bring you to the village."
I answered in a soft voice, "What happened to them? Did they withhold the rations?"
With the look Atelier manifesting, I know it is devastating. I gritted my teeth. Even at this nightfall, I have to visit the King and talk to her if I needed to. The village doesn't deserve to be treated like that. I had suffered in that arena, my soul has been transferred to this body, and yet, all of my decisions for this life was wrong.
What am I going to do with Devi? Me, as Ashleigh, what should I do?
The carriage went down smoothly, landing at a safe place that was enough to view the village. Atelier guided me out of the magical carriage, made sure that my cape was covering my head and ending at the chin.
The village was a stronghold, nestled in a rugged and unforgiving landscape, and it was perched at the edge of a vast forest and surrounded by steep mountains. I had a news about it with some of the sentinels that is working for me: the people living here were hardened by force and the environment. The warriors, the craftsmen, and they are known for the unyielding spirit and fierce loyalty for their Goddess.
This small village has been thriving for a delicate balance of resources and military prowess. I and my mother is leading this people, and even though I have no idea with leadership, it hits me to know that my decision has made the village in its downfall of rations. That one moment where they have been doing good and they're not on the brink of death.
The air thick with the scent of iron and earth, and the sounds of hammering and clinking of armor echo through the village. Fires produced smoke in the air, and those cooking hearty meals must be their last. They look like they're preparing for the next battle with the chaos going on.
It was thrown into one. The rations that was vital to the villagers---and they don't know the reason yet. They were murmuring and talking to each other, maybe this is because of the politics, lack of resources, or an outside threat. The tension has risen as the food supplies were withheld. I saw how much the armed forces pushed the villagers from their place and I was surprised.
Atelier and I exchanged glances. I immediately run to the old woman and helped her on her feet. The commanding officer, the one who must be bringing the news, stepped forward as I was helping the woman in the front of the crowd. She didn't recognize me for a while, and just said a hope of gratitude.
When I finished helping her, Atelier came towards me and hitched me towards the side. When the officer come forth, the people started to scream in outrage. They have been searching for the rations, and it was already night... why have they not received it yet?
Someone on the side said that they received it at morning, and even until now, there was no ration.
"Attention, everyone! I am here to announce about the rations." Everyone fell silent.
"The Goddess of War has decided to forfeit her leadership in this village and neglect her responsibilities as the Goddess in the Kingdom of Ashes. In behalf of this decision that the Goddess made, the King of Ashes has come up with the decision to withhold all the rations for this village. We have encouraged everyone in this village to pay the necessary amount for the rations."
The air in the village has turned thick with the rage and betrayal. I saw it with my eyes... the sense of unity once defined the people that now crumbled like shattered stone beneath the weight of the Goddess' actions. The Goddess of War, standing at the center of the storm, that was once unshakable authority questioned by those who once followed her without hesitation.
The Goddess stood at the side, the figure towering and regal and even her stature seemed diminished now, because the people bound to hate the leaders that promised their safety and good living. My heart aches with the weight of the curses, but deep down, it was my decision. They had burst angrily.
The fury is no longer controlled and contained by respect and fear. They didn't see the efforts that the Goddess who led them for years, and that it was overshadowed with poor decision the Goddess has made. I witnessed the rage in their eyes and the storm of people complaining left and right.
Atelier held my hand, and she hitched me away from the chaos. It was good that she had seen this coming, knowing that I don't have any clue regarding what would happen next. She dragged me towards the outside gates, and pointed at the carriage.
I stated, "What am I going to do? Why should I run from this chaos?"
Atelier dragged me to the side of the trees and made me look at the crowd. They are, once again, trying to jump up and down, fighting some of the soldiers and was beaten through on the ground. They are just commoners, normal civilians who have done nothing in this world but to trust their leader.
And yet, I failed them.
Atelier told me, "Look at them and how vicious they were. They have wanted the best for their family, but huge change can lead them to react this way. I completely understand their anger."
And again, it was my fault: that the children doesn't have any food to eat at dinner, and the commoners become tired of doing everything to survive just one more day. I become anxious, and my whole body trembled. I can see the real problem here, and I can't breathe.
"Let's go to the King," I demanded. I hurried to the carriage and Atelier hitched me back to the tree and onto hiding, but I was resistant. I nearly hitch off the cape from my head but Atelier was on my rescue.
"I am deciding for it, Atelier! I need to go to the King to fix this!"
I shook off her hand from me, decided to ride the carriage.
"My Goddess! Where are you going?!" Atelier would rather choose to have this kind of leadership than call the King out? I don't understand her. That's why, when she stopped me again, I turned to her harshly.
"You think I can let these citizens go weak without doing something? I don't think I can do that."
Atelier was surprised by what I am doing. She sighed, and told me, "You have to think it over. It's the King. It's not just a King, but the King of Ashes. We have to be careful with every word we---"
"I completely don't care about that, because this is no way he is humane!" I shouted. I put my hands on my waist and looked back at the carriage. I turned to her again and Atelier was looking down, as if she's thinking of a way to get my attention and listen to her.
"I won't listen to you and you reasons. This is a matter of me and the King. It is between us that I need to talk to," I told her. I rode the carriage and waved in the air, signaling its departure. Atelier didn't even run towards the carriage to have a ride. If she doesn't care, so am I.
I was grim the whole ride. When the carriage landed in front of the castle, in the same spot I was fetched by Atelier, the fear creeped in me.
How do I tell that the people shouldn't be dragged and that I still don't want to be the Goddess?