I pulled away. "I don't like hugs." He said bluntly looking away. "What do you mean??" I asked in pure shock. "Hugs are amazing!" I said. "I haven't had much hugs in my lifetime." He looked down. "Oh...." I said. "Well I'll hug you" I hugged him again. I took his arms and wrapped them around me. "See it's nice." I said. "It's ok."He scoffed a bit. "Shut up you know you like it." I smiled. "Ok ok that's enough hugging for now." He said letting go. He lead me to the candle lit table. It was so sweet.
After while I asked him something. "Why don't you like hugs?" I asked. "I haven't had much in my lifetime, I told you." He said. "I know but since you haven't had much hugs won't you crave it." I questioned. "No." He replied. "But-" he cut me off. "I had a rough start at life....that's all you need to know" he spoke in a serious voice. I didn't want to meddle so I just nodded "Let's dance." He said seriously. I was taken back by the seriousness in his tone. "Sure." I smiled
shyly. He took my hands gently in his. The faint music in the background played as we swayed gently. Even if we don't love each other, I sure had a great time on my honeymoon.
I smiled softly at him. He returned with a small smile. "'I had a really great time," I uttered "Me too." He replied before gently dipping me. He lifted me upright once more. I sighed a bit. "Don't sigh it's annoying.' He scowled. I giggled. "Why are you laughing?" He asked in a serious tone. "No reason, you're just extra cute when you say that now." I replied.
Later that night I had the last set of lingerie and it wasn't too bad to wear. And I was too lazy to rummage through Ian's bag. He wouldn't mind right? It's just sleepwear. And it's so comfy. I took a deep breath and exited the bathroom. I quickly avoided eye contact and laid on the bed and covered with the comforter. I heard him chuckle lightly.
He slapped my bare butt playful earning a giggle from me. I turned to him. He wasn't wearing a shirt either. He seems comfortable so I didn't want to say anything. Moreover he didn't care about my lingerie either so.
He yanked me close to him getting comfortable to sleep. I noticed how well rested he looked, rather than when we were back at home. Maybe since he was sleeping next to me? Psht nah, I'm sure he's ok.
Today we were leaving for home. I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like, while living back at home. Would he be this nice? Would he be this open? Would he talk to me? Would he hate me? So much questions flooded my mind.
Before it didn't matter. But now I know I'll have to spend the rest of my life with this man. What if he doesn't want me....What if I'm not going enough for him....
I'm dragged out of my thoughts when I heard
him whisper. "It's time to board," he spoke
holding out his hand. I took it carefully before
we walked together. Maybe he doesn't hate me. Maybe he thinks I'm not as bad as I seem. Maybe he's just covering up the hate he has for me with affection. No it can't be. He hates me. He was forced into this arrangement. He has every right to not like
me. I had so many questions. But I fear if I ask them he'd think I was weird. Isighed slightly gazing at him as we sat on the plane. He sat at the window gazing outside. I couldn't help but trace the veins on his hands, with his tattoos. I wanted to ask him about his tattoos. I wanted to ask him why he was so serious. I wanted to ask him why he doesn't accept affection. I wanted to ask him so many things.....that he didn't want me to know....