I understand, Lougee. Here's a more specific, focused revision:
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The storm rumbled again as Felipe stood frozen, staring down at the cloth-wrapped body of Alicia. His hands shook as he gripped the shovel, the edge of it sinking deeper into the muddy earth with each passing moment. The crowd around him was a blur, their murmurs fading in the deafening roar of thunder above.
He hadn't realized how long he'd been standing there, eyes locked on his sister's body, now cradled in the earth's cold embrace. Her death still felt unreal, a nightmare that wouldn't end.
"Felipe." Mang Ernesto's voice, rough and commanding, broke through his daze. The old man stood a few feet away, his hands weathered even more from the water running through his skin, waiting. "Continue the rites."
Felipe blinked, shaking his head as if to clear the fog in his mind. He swallowed hard, forcing himself to look away from Alicia's grave.
He climbed back up, Rinoâ his sister's boyfriend gestured his hands, as if to ask for permission if they begin covering her corpse with dirt. His heart pounded, each beat a reminder that he had to let go. Slowly, he raised the shovel once more, the weight of it heavier than before.
With the first strike, the rain began to fall in sheets, muddying the already soaked ground beneath him. But it didn't matter. Nothing could drown out the storm raging inside him.
Father Ruben sprayed holy water while chanting prayers to the deceased. But everything feels like a blur and he was out of sorts the whole time.
He could not stop thinking about his sister's sudden demise. And he wanted to investigate her death desperately, to the point that the shovels wooden handle almost broke because of the strength he gave off while clenching his fists.
Here's a refined version with more clarity and emotional weight:
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Father Ruben sprayed holy water over the grave, his voice steady as he chanted prayers for the deceased. The crowd murmured their responses, but for Felipe, the words were distant, drowned out by the pounding of his own thoughts. Everything around him was a blurâvoices, faces, even the sound of the rain.
All he could think about was Alicia's sudden death. The unanswered questions clawed at his mind.
How could this have happened? Why?
The need to uncover the truth burned in him like a fire he couldn't extinguish.
His grip on the shovel tightened until his knuckles turned white. The wooden handle groaned under the strain, nearly splintering as he clenched his fist.
He wasn't even aware of the strength he was exertingâonly the frustration and desperation boiling inside him.
Mang Ernesto, standing nearby, caught sight of his son's trembling hands and the tension in his frame. He stepped closer, his voice low but firm. "Felipe, control yourself," he warned. "This isn't the time to let your anger get the best of you."
Felipe's head snapped up, his gaze meeting his father's. For a moment, he didn't respond, his chest rising and falling with sharp, uneven breaths. Then, with visible effort, he loosened his grip on the shovel and looked away. The fire in his eyes, however, didn't dim.
"I'll get revenge one day," he muttered, the words bitter on his tongue. "No matter who killed you, it doesn't matter. Whether they hold power in this society or hide in the shadowsâI'll find them."
He exhaled shakily, his breath clouding in the cold air. "I'll make sure to avenge your death, Alicia. I'll bring justice to the man who murdered you, even if it costs me everything."
Her body was now covered with soil and he striked his shovel in the ground.
Patawad, Alicia.